I own no one but my own people

A/N Canon divergent in that Regina split herself so that she could share her 'non evil' soul with Robin and that brings him back to life and OQ married at the end of S5. Takes place after the end of S6. Everyone's happy, everyone's married, no villains to fight, no more curses… it's all good.

"No."

"Come on!"

"No."

"It'll be fun!"

"I'd rather gouge my eyes out with rusty forks."

"I'm with the crocodile. I don't like the sound of this either."

"You're my son-in-law, you don't get a choice."

Hook shared a look with Emma who was biting back a smile and just shrugged as if to say 'she's got a point'.

"I'm not going to partake in a childish tradition," Rumple argued, ignoring the pleading look Belle was giving him.

"It is not childish and yes you are doing Secret Santa," David replied in place of his wife. "We ALL are," he added with a pointed look towards Hook.

"Well I think it'll be fun," said Robin, the first vote of confidence since Snow gathered them all at the sheriff's station and informed them all of her plan.

"Thank you, Robin. See? He gets it!"

"Of course the Boy Scout think it's a good idea," Zelena muttered, gaining a rather annoyed look from Robin who choose not to throw back a harsh retort.

Not like he would have had much of a chance because at that moment Robyn, who had playing quietly on the floor of the station with her stuffed arrows, ran over to Robin and pulled on his pant leg.

"I wet, Daddy," Robyn informed her father, looking up at him with her big bright green eyes.

"I'll change her," Zelena offered rather eagerly.

The red headed witch only saw her daughter on Wednesday's and every other weekend. Other than that she lived with Robin, Regina and Roland full time and it was such a rare occasion to see her child outside of those particular days that when she did; Zelena liked to make the absolute most of it.

Not that her daughter made it easy for her though.

Robyn responded to the innocent request by whinging and clutching Robins leg tighter, shaking her head so hard her braid hit her in the face several times.

"Want Daddy!"

Robin just chuckled, missing the pained look on Zelena's face as he ruffled Robyn's hair. "That's fine. Come on, little peanut, Daddy'll change you."

After recovering from that moment Zelena reached into her bag, pulling out a pull-up decorated with pink teddy bears. "I got a spare pull-up if you need it."

Regina took one look at the pull-up and shook her head. "No she hates the teddy bear ones, they're a bit too tight for her. She actually prefers the ones with the fish on them."

Sure enough Robin reached in his satchel and pulled out a pull-up covered in green and orange fishes and without sparing Zelena so much as a second glance but taking time to give Regina a quick peck on the lips, sealing the promise that he would be right back he got up from his seat, picked up Robyn and headed into the restroom.

"Turns out your mother isn't the only woman in your life who prefers someone else over you," said Rumple.

"Okay, that's enough of that," warned Snow, hoping to quench what was sure to become a tirade of insults back and forth between the witch and dark one. "It is three weeks until Christmas, no one is allowed to insult anyone."

Regina just scoffed, raising her brow at the woman with the pixie cut. "You've met my side of the family right?"

"ANYWAY…" David cut in, his eyes darting between the three reformed villains. "We're all doing this, no more complaints."

Snow took a deep breath, forcing the smile she had worn previously back to her lips before she grabbed a piece of scrap paper and began writing all of their names on it.

"Now, I decided to add a fun little twist to this," Snow informed them, ripping the bits of paper and putting them into Belles hat. "Rather than just buy something at a store or order something online, whatever we get our Secret Santa has to be either homemade, or it has to be something that didn't cost anything."

"Oh come on, Mom... Most of these things just have people exchanging gift cards and everyone's happier for it," Emma said above the groans of the rest of the crowd. "Now we have to MAKE something?"

"It'll mean more knowing it comes from the heart," Snow argued as she shook the hat so the names could get mixed up as Robin emerged with a freshly changed Robyn who ran back over to her pile of toys.

When the crowd groaned again, Snow frowned at the people surrounding her, her shoulders slumping and the excitement she felt when she came up with the idea draining. "I know it's gonna be a little extra work but… this is the first Christmas we've had together where we aren't separated by curses or fake identities or even death. There's no villains wreaking havoc on the town and one half the group isn't trying to kill the other half… I just thought this might be a fun way to celebrate that."

A guilty silence fell over the group. Even Rumple managed to look a little ashamed at his previous protests.

Henry, who had been silent up until now, jumped up from his chair and made his way over to Snow with a beaming grin on his face. "Well I think a Secret Santa is an excellent idea. I'm really looking forward to it."

A soft smile made its way on Emma's face before she reached over and took Snow's hand in hers. "Me too, Mom."

"Me three," Regina added.

"Here here," Hook conformed with a curt nod.

The rest of the group turned towards Rumple who just sighed and rolled his eyes with a flourished wave of his hand. "I suppose it won't be absolutely terrible…"

That was enough for the princess.

Snow beamed at the gathering before she shook the hat once more for good measure and held it out to Henry.

"If you get one of your mom's you have to pick again," Snow informed him. "It's not fair you only buy one gift and not the other."

Henry nodded as he reached into the hat and picked out a piece of paper and looked at it, smiled, nodded and put the slip into his pocket. Snow shook the hat again and offered it to Regina who reached in the black felt hat.

"Oh you've GOT to be kidding me," Regina snapped as she looked at the bit of paper. "Let me pick again."

"Sorry no take backs or switches," Snow informed her, offering the hat to Hook who grinned at his selection.

"Oh this'll be an easy one," he said as Emma picked hers, groaning loudly and flopping down in her chair.

"Great," she said rather dryly. Emma turned towards Hook and held out her paper. "Switch with me."

Hook took one look at her name and laughed at his wife's newest predicament. "I love you, Swan, but not that much."

"No switches," Snow reminded them, "and this is supposed to be a secret."

She offered the hat to Zelena then Belle, neither of whom had a particularly memorable responses, then to David who looked like he had just been handed a death sentence but unlike the rest of the unsatisfied group he choose to keep his complaints to himself.

Snow picked next, grinning wildly at the name she choose before she stuffed the paper into the pocket of her cardigan and offered the hat to Robin whose face fell when he read his name.

"You have to let me switch," he told the princess.

"Robin-."

"Please?"

"No switching. Okay, none of us are enemies anymore, we're all heroes… everyone gets the name they choose and that's that."

Finally she handed the hat to Rumple who, with a heavy sigh, picked his name and looked at the piece of paper. When he read the name his bored expression morphed into a rather dangerous smirk."

"Oh ho…. Well I thought this'll be a painful excursion but this might actually be fun."

Hooks face fell at the almost cryptic words.

"Who'd you get?" he demanded.

"Don't you worry your pretty little head about that, Pirate. It is supposed to be a secret after all…" he said with a wink towards his oldest friend and oldest enemy.

"Any bloody thing the crocodile gets me I'm not opening!" Hook barked.

"Oh relax, he isn't going to do anything dangerous," Snow assured him, although the ways her eyes darted towards the smirking man her words didn't have quite the impact she wanted. "Now, we all have our names, I'm thinking we do the gift exchange when we all go over to Regina's for dinner?"

Belle nodded. "Sounds good to me."

"Good." Snow beamed at her family, clapping her hands together. "Gosh, this is so exciting! I just know you guys are gonna have so much fun picking out your gifts and seeing the look on your persons face when they open them!"

Her exclamation was met with a few grumbles of disagreement but she choose to ignore those and instead just wrapped her arms around David, the light in her eyes making, in the prince's point of view at least, this whole excursion worth it.

Sensing that this particular meeting had come to a close the group all separated into their own groups.

"You ready to go home, Peanut?" Robin asked his daughter as he picked her up while Regina packed up the toys and stuffed them into his satchel which had, more or less, became their baby bag.

Zelena walked over to the small family, clearing her throat. "I um… I was wondering if I might be able to talk to you," said the red head when she had their attention. "I um- I know Christmas is on a Tuesday this year and it's not my day with her…"

"We're letting you have Christmas Eve with her," Robin reminded her.

"You're letting me have her from 1-6 before you come pick her up to take her to church in the middle of the bloody forest."

"Friar Tuck always does a Midnight Mass."

"And you're taking her to church, again, in the morning," Zelena argued. "How much can you REALLY stomach hearing about one magic baby? Hell, Emma was born with magic but you don't wanna stay up late to hear about her birth."

"Zelena," Regina warned. "Don't."

"Well it's not fair, Regina!" Zelena snapped. "I have gifts that I want to give her too, I have traditions of my own I wanna share with her as well!"

Robin sighed, shifting Robyn from one arm to the other. "You can't have her in the morning. She's going to open gifts with her brothers and then I'm taking her and Roland to Christmas Mass. Would the afternoon work with you? Then afterwards you can bring her round Regina's for dinner. Roland and I will be spending most of the afternoon at the soup kitchen volunteering anyway."

"No! She'll be tired from your religious fanatically and nap most of the time! She is two years old, she doesn't need to go to church much less go to it twice in a twelve hour period, Robin!"

"It's the afternoon or nothing at all," Robin told her, a finality in his voice that let Zelena know this was the end of the discussion.

Zelena debated arguing but when she saw the look on Robyn's face and saw her clutch her father tighter as if she was afraid of the red head. Zelena sighed, rubbing her temples. "Fine. Fine, I'll have her for the afternoon. But since the next day is Wednesday can I just take her back home and she can spend the night?"

"We'll see," was all Robin said before he turned to a slightly guilt ridden Regina. "You ready, M'lady?"

"Am I allowed to tell her goodbye?" Zelena muttered darkly. Without waiting for a response Zelena leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on Robyn's cheek, ignoring the fact she wiped it from her skin.

"Mummy loves you so much, my little green bean," Zelena cooed. "I'll see you Wednesday okay? Perhaps you and I can bake some Christmas cookies together."

Robyn didn't say a word and just clung to her dad tighter.

Zelena swallowed hard before she turned and left the sheriff's station, missing Robin gently chastise their daughter for not kissing her mother goodbye.

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