(A/N) If this sucks, I am truly sorry. This was one of the first fanfictions I wrote, so please bear with me. This is also the first fanfiction I've ever written and put on the internet. If you hate it, that's cool, if you love it, awesome. This is a oneshot, though there is another side-piece that goes along with it; if you want to see that one, please tell me.

I won't scream at you to review, but it'd be cool if you did.

And so we go!

The Day That Killed Blaise Zabini

Something was off. That was the first thing Draco Malfoy thought when he woke up Monday. The war was over, Voldemort was dead, Lucius was in Azkaban, and most of Draco's problems had been fixed, so what could be wrong?

Oh right, Blaise Zabini.

Blaise Zabini was Draco's (only) friend, as they had finally decided after the war that they didn't really have reason to hate each other. It had actually been Blaise's idea, as he was the more social of the two, to become friends. After the war no one really wanted to associate with a former Death Eater. Blaise's parents had not been Death Eaters, as his father was dead, and his mother was a (very) rich golddigger, all of her deceased husbands leaving her with copious amounts of gold. Sketchy, in Draco's opinion.

Blaise Zabini was a quiet person, one who preferred to study and didn't go around cursing people and insulting them. Since Draco had lost Crabbe in the war and Goyle had estranged himself from everyone, Draco was left with two choices: Hang out with Blaise and keep sanity, or hang out with Pansy and have your brain slowly turned to mush.

Needless to say, Draco chose Blaise.

Blaise wasn't outwardly bigoted like Draco, but instead resorted to beating those he deemed lesser at Quidditch and classes. Draco was fairly smart, a fact which he had only learned after his time with Blaise than with Crabbe and Goyle. (Any time spent with those two idiots will make your brain dull.) Blaise pestered Draco to study, which made Draco nickname him the 'Granger of Slytherin', a tag Blaise embraced, much to Draco's consternation.

Now, why was Draco blaming Blaise for whatever was wrong? He'd had an arguement with Blaise the previous night, resulting in Blaise casting a spell on Draco, which visually had not done a thing. Inside however, Draco felt something change.

Blaise had messed with Draco and now he would pay.

Scowling, Draco lifted his hand to make sure it wasn't missing or covered in boils. He was relieved to see neither of those had happened, but was worried by what had.

His skin was darker.

Not too much darker, but darker. Draco's normally pale alabaster skin had darkened to a rich, warm, sun-kissed tan with a scattering of small freckles on the back of his hand.

Concerned, Draco sat up and checked himself, trying to determine what else was wrong. He looked up his arm, noticing that it was considerably thinner and less muscular(not that he was particularly so), and his fingers were shorter, his hands, smaller. He was just beginning to calm down when he looked at what he was wearing and almost screamed.

He was wearing purple. Purple. And- oh no. That was definitely not supposed to be there.

Grimacing, Draco glanced over at his other arm, his left one, to see if his Dark Mark was still there. Nope, it was gone. Unfortunately for him, something else was.

Scrawled across the inner forearm in capital letters, scars not quite healed, was the word 'Mudblood'.

That was when he screamed.

'Blaise turned me into Granger!?' Draco was horrified.

Looking around, Draco discovered that he was also in Granger's room. Not that he'd been in Granger's room much, but he'd seen it several times before she slammed the door in his face.

They both lived in the Head Dorms, a separate living space where the Head Boy and Head Girl stayed. It was a new thing, something Headmistress McGonagall had come up with to help with 'inter House unity', or other such garbage.

Still quite disturbed, Draco gingerly got out of the bed, making sure he avoided looking in the mirror. He found Granger's wand and picked it up, magicking her uniform on and trying to fix her unruly hair. He didn't have much luck, which annoyed him to no end since his own hair was always in impeccable condition.

Grumbling, he made his way to the mirror and stared. He was definitely Granger. The only difference he had to her at the moment was the distainful expression he often wore, and that was a strange look on Granger's face.

"Malfoy, I'm going to kill you!" roared a voice from outside.

But not just any voice, it was his voice. Draco's voice.

'Has Granger been turned into me?' Draco wondered, opening the door carefully, his hand gripping Granger's wand.

He walked out into the common room of the Head Dorm and looked around. Soon enough, his own bedroom door burst open and he stormed out, glaring profusely.

"Good morning!" Draco said cheerily in Granger's voice.

Granger, a. k. a, his body, clenched her/his fists and scowled. Draco was mildly startled by how frightening she looked doing that, and wondered if he always looked that intimidating when he scowled. No wonder everyone was scared of him.

"What did you do?" Granger growled using Draco's voice.

"What are you talking about, Draco?" Draco inwardly smirked. This was going to be fun. He smiled innocently up at Granger, slightly peeved at how short he was now. How had he never noticed how tiny Granger was before?

"I am not Draco, Malfoy, and you know that!" Granger hissed, leaning down and sticking her nose in his face.

"I don't know what you're talking about, darling." Draco reached up with Granger's hand and tapped her on the nose.

Granger growled something incoherent, pulling away and looking down at him in distain.

"Don't call me 'darling', ferret." Granger snarled, poking his chest.

Draco caught her wrist and pulled her back down to his level.

"Alright, Granger," he smirked, twirling a coffee colored curl around his finger. "You might know that I'm Draco, but Potter and Weaselbee don't, do they? You're dating Weasley, right? What if I went and snogged Potter?"

"I always knew you had a thing for Harry," Granger returned his smirk.

Draco grimaced.

"Eugh, on second thought, I won't do that." Draco decided, frowning. "Ah well, I think it's Blaise's fault. We were arguing last night and he cast a spell on me. I can't go talk to him, since I'm you, so you're going to have to ask him about it at breakfast."

"What!?" Granger cried. "I can't sit over there with those- those- those Slytherins!"

"Oh, thanks," Draco said sarcastically. "Well, we can't fix this unless we leave. The Library's out there, Blaise is out there, anyone who could help us is outside the dorm. We're going to have to go out at some point."

"O…kay?" Granger shifted nervously. "How do I act? Like, what are your mannerisms?"

"Don't shift like you're nervous," Draco advised, crossing his arms and tilting his chin up. "Act like you own everything. If somebody asks you something you don't know, glare at them until they shut up. Don't initiate any conversations unless you feel the need to insult someone. Do insult Blaise, would you?"

Granger nodded, shifting her posture so she stood up straight raised her chin arrogantly.

"Good," Draco absently sifted his fingers through Granger's bushy mass of hair, surprised at how soft it was. "You know, your hair isn't as awful as I said. It's quite soft."

Granger blinked at him, biting her lip uncomfortably.

"Don't do that," Draco snapped. "Don't bite your lip, it makes you seem unsure. Don't talk to Pansy at all, she'll take it as a sign you're giving her permission to kiss you. If you're feeling nervous and need something to do with your hands, run them through your hair or twist the ring with the snake insignia on it. Never, never, take that ring off. It's extremely important. Don't lose it."

Granger nodded, raising her right hand and slowly twisting the black and opal ring around her middle finger.

"And don't smile," Draco added seriously. "Smirk, scowl, glare, but don't smile."

"Alright," Granger crossed her arms, seeming prepared. "Do you need a rundown on what I act like?"

"Nope," Draco smirked. "Always keep nose in book. Raise hand in every class. Free house-elves. I got it, Granger, let's go."

Granger glared at him, but followed all the same. They ran down the marble steps to the Great Hall, but Granger paused before entering.

"What are they going to think if we come in at the same time?" she whispered to him, pulling him aside so that they were out of sight.

"Fair point," Draco conceded, an idea forming. A smirk grew on his face before he quickly wiped it away so Granger didn't see. "You go in first, I'll come in second. Be warned, I might end up destroying your relationship with Weaselbee by accident today."

"You'd better not," Granger growled, poking him in the chest again. "Alright, I'll go first."

Draco nodded and let her walk to the entrance. She stopped in the doorway to watch everyone, so Draco took this chance to set his faultless plan into action. Breathing quickly and in deep pants, he ran to the huge doorway, grabbing Granger's arm and pulling on it. She whirled, not expecting him to be the one on her arm. She stared wordlessly, confused as to what he was doing. Draco shot her a smirk before wiping his face clear and beginning his act.

"Draco, how could you!" he cried, having some difficulty holding down his laughter.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Granger," she said gruffly, widening her eyes at him to tell him to shut up.

"Don't know what I'm talking about, huh?" Draco crossed his arms over his chest and pouted at her. "Stop lying, Draco!"

"'Mione?"

Draco whirled.

Ronald Weasley and Harry Potter were both walking over, looking concerned.

"What?" Draco snapped, blinking his eyes rapidly to look like he was holding back tears.

"'Mione," Weasley began, looking sympathetic. It sickened Draco. "What happened? Did Malfoy hurt you?"

"Oh, he hurt me alright!" Draco screeched, turning back to Granger, who was glaring again, and hitting her in the chest. "How dare you!"

"How dare I what!?" Granger shoved Draco back, scowling.

"Oi!" Weasley yelled, stepping in front of Draco and pointing his wand at Granger. "That's my girlfriend you're touching!"

"Oh, Ron," Draco pretended to simper. He was mildly disgusted by being called 'girlfriend', but that was crucial to his plot. "I'm sorry, but…"

"But what, 'Mione?" Weasley turned and placed his hands on Draco's shoulders, looking worried. "What did Malfoy do to you?"

"I can't tell you!" Draco faked sobbing by covering his face with his hands, his shoulders shaking. In reality, he was shaking with silent laughter, but they didn't know that.

"Whatever she's saying, it's a lie!" Granger snarled, desprately trying to reign in the situation.

"What happened, Hermione?" Potter asked worriedly.

Draco shook his head and pushed Weasley's hands off, gently(it pained him not to shove Weasley) moving him out of the way and running to Granger, throwing his arms dramatically around her neck and sobbing extravagantly into her chest.

"What are you doing?" Granger hissed into his ear, trying, unsuccessfully, to pry him off.

"Hermione!" Potter cried, sounding shocked.

Draco, still offended at his new height, jumped onto Granger's toes and stretched himself up, yanking her head down with the hands still behind her head.

"I'm ruining your relationship, Granger," Draco smirked, stretching up just a bit more so he could kiss her.

"MIONE!" shouted Weasley, aghast.

Granger jerked back and shoved Draco off, looking angry and disgusted. Draco replaced his mask of sadness, throwing himself after her, but falling short.

"But Draco!" Draco sobbed, reaching for Granger. "Please take me back, Dray!"

Granger looked horrified, and was backing up towards the Slytherin table.

"You've been dating Malfoy behind our backs!?" Weasley roared.

Draco turned to the Weasel, wiping his dry eyes and pushing his bottom lip out in a childish pout.

"I'm so sorry, Ron!" Draco collasped into Weasley's arms, burying his face into Weasley's shoulder, while inwardly retching. "I wanted to tell you so badly, but I couldn't bring myself to end your happiness! I was just so in love with Draco…I thought we'd actually make it. Oh, Ronald!"

Granger, who was standing behind them, curled her lip in revulsion, walking forward and dragging Draco off of Weasley.

"Come on, you stupid know-it-all," Granger growled, pulling Draco back out of the Great Hall.

As they left, a certain Blaise Zabini smirked to himself, knowing full well what had just transpired, and knowing that when the spell wore off the next morning, the Head Boy and Girl would most likely come and murder him.

Ah well, he still had time.

(A/N) Did that suck? You decide. And please tell me what you thought as well. :D