Disclaimer: i do not own My Hero Academia/Boku no Hero Academia.

BAKUGOU'S BARMAN ADVENTURE

(Prologue: Shota Aizawa needs redbull.)

Shota Aizawa muffled a yawn, covering his mouth and scratching his chin. The light from his computer screen was making his head ache from tiredness, and the cup of coffee on his side had been empty for a long time.

Being a teacher in UA High demanded many things from the dark-haired pro-hero, like dedication and good-judgement when training and teaching a classroom full of teenagers. Of course, his sternness was rather infamous among the school grounds: he had been responsible for more than one case of mass expulsion, something that, in his mind, made perfect sense. If a class isn't hero material and had no potential, it's people had no reason to be there at all.

Such was a teacher's duty. And another one of those duties was the fuck-ton of papers and essays he had to avaliate, to Aizawa's dismay.

"Almost there…", he growled, seeing that the list was getting shorter, although in a slow pace. For the last 5 hours and into the depths of night, his life had been nothing but tests and authorizations to fill, like a jungle of black and white symbols that stopped making sense long ago.

"Mina Ashido… hm, probably an F", he sighed tiredly, almost forgetting to check if the acid quirk user's answers were actually wrong.

Turns out they were. F it is.

"All Might requests a class leave to visit the Hero National Museum…", another yawn, one he didn't bother to muffle. "Yeah, yeah, approved."

He passed along the final steps of his work, begging it to be over. An A there, a B here, another request from some student, something about trash collecting being rotated, yes, yes, approved; a message from Ms. Joke asking him on a date, yeah, sure, why not…

The last one. Thank god.

"Yadda yadda, Ms. Ashido Mina requests authorization to, blah blah, hold a party at the Class 1-A dorm, permission to bring alcoholic beverages, etc etc", he mumbled, the words losing all meaning while the teacher fought the weight of his eyelids.

The word 'alcohol' was brought to his attention. Ugh, I could use some whiskey right now.

He couldn't take it anymore. His body-blanket was practically calling him home.

"Fuck it: approved", he groaned as he pressed enter, before immediately falling back from his chair and plopping on the body-blanket, his hand closing the zipper automatically.

Mina Ashido yawned, her barefoot steps echoing on the empty dorm's common room.

While the pink-skinned girl wasn't know for being an early riser, she made an exception of this particular saturday: the day before had been so tiring and frustrating that the girl simply hooped on her bed as soon as she reached her dorm. A surprise test was not what she expected of a friday, and the stress that came with it had rendered her a pile of nerves.

"Ugh, I hope it went well", she sighed, scratching her head and heading for the kitchen. It was empty, so she could enjoy the benefits of having its contents all for herself. Namely, Sato's cookies. "If not, guess I'll have to actually study hard for once."

She opened the fridge, revealing the cookies inside. She licked her lips, grabbing two… no, three for herself.

The usual early risers were always Iida, Midoriya and Todoroki, going for a morning jog or training outside the dorm. As such, no one would object this many cookies were missing, right? Yeah, put the blame on the hard-working ones.

"Man, this is so boring", she said, plopping on the couch. "No one awake to talk to, nothing to do, no plans… gonna be a boring day off."

She sighed, swinging her foot back and forth. Going back to sleep was a no go, so she settled in watching the sun slowly rise through the glass walls on the front door.

After a while, she heard footsteps coming from the stairs in a dragging and sleepy way. Turning her head, she saw Katsuki Bakugou approaching the kitchen with his usual scowl. With his eyes semi-serrated, he seemed to be having a rough morning too.

He ignored Mina and went straight for the fridge, grabbing a cookie a munching it aggressively.

"Mornin' Bakugou", she chirped, grinning. "Fell out of bed?"

"Fuck off", he growled. "Unlike certain people, I don't stay in bed the whole damn morning."

"I hear ya, I hear ya", she answered, snorting.

While she wasn't a big fan of Bakugou, she had to admit the guy was making an effort: when the year started, all she could hear from him were yells and swearing, stomping people down and avoiding any form of contact with the rest of his class.

Not that he stopped being an ass, mind you, he simply seemed to be getting… a little more tolerant. He didn't threw fits as much as before, and now seemed to engage in actual conversations with people (mainly Kirishima, Kaminari and herself).

Did that mean they were friends? Well, if Bakugou actually had friends, she and the other two were the only ones that he could call it so.

Except Midoriya. Man, she did not understand their relationship, and probably never would.

"You making coffee?", she asked as soon a she heard the coffee machine turning on.

"Yeah?", he barked as a response. "What of it?"

"Can you bring me a cup, pleeease?", she begged, turning her head to look at him with pleading eyes.

"Fuck no. Get it yourself", he answered, scoffing.

"Come on, ma~n, don't be mean", she insisted.

Bakugou growled again, losing patience. Looking at the pink girl, he got even more irritated at her pouting expression and puppy eyes.

'What in the fuck hair-for-brain sees on her annoying ass, I'll never know', he thought.

"Fine, geez", he gave up before popping a vein. "Just go get the fucking mail while I finish. Make yourself useful."

"Thank you, blasty~, love ya!", she commemorated her successful persuasion, to which he scoffed, before she blinked in confusion. "What? Mail? Do we even get mail?"

Bakugou growled again. "There's a mailbox right beside the door, in case you haven't noticed. You dumb or something?"

Mina frowned. "I'm not dumb", she answered, turning to look at the door. To her amazement, there actually was a mailbox close to the door. "Uh… why would we receive mail? Couldn't they just e-mail us?"

"How the fuck should I know?", Bakugou scoffed back in a low tone, now getting really annoyed with her constant questions. "I can see there's a letter inside. Just go get the fucking thing."

"Ughh, fine", Mina sighed, jumping off the couch and walking towards the entrance.

Using her hand to shield her eyes against the sunlight, she opened the metallic switch and grabbed the only piece of paper that was inside the box. 'Huh, guess blasty was right.'

She turned her back to the door and analysed the letter: it was a standard UA High envelope, probably some kind of report or warning, or whatever the geezers from the school administration thought was worth sending a letter for.

For a moment, she considered dropping the envelope on the common table and leave it to someone who was actually interested on it. Either from curiosity or boredom, she decided to open it: the letter came out and she straightened it to properly read the thing.

Sporting the UA symbol and the signature of their homeroom teacher, she grimaced as she started to read it: maybe it was the results from the surprise test, something that Mina did not want to read first thing in the morning

To her surprise, she recognized what was written: her 'formal request' to throw a party at the Class 1-A dorm. She snorted lightly, remembering how funny it was to send the request as a joke, even if it would be summarily denied and the class would receive a light scold from Aizawa.

"'Hm, permission to bring alcoholic beverage', hehehe, man, what was I thinking", she snorted as she kept reading. "Yadda yadda, 'your request has been evaluated and Shoto Aizawa has deemed the suggestion denie…'"

Mina blinked.

Where the word 'denied' should be, there was actually a big 'approved' written, with a green stamp on top of it.

Green. Means that something is approved.

Red is bad. Green is good. Green is 'approved'.

Her request had been approved.

"What the fuck", she managed to mumble, her eyes wide and body shaking.

"Oy, what does it say?", Bakugou demanded with a yell from the kitchen.

Mine couldn't believe in what she was seeing with her own eyes. She scratched the authorization with her nail, to see if it had been a prank from Kaminari or Mineta, but nothing happened: the seal of approval was still there, clear as day

"OY, PINK BITCH! What does it say?!", Bakugou yelled louder, now furious with the girl's sudden silence and dumb expression.

Her response came a few seconds later.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!", Mina shouted at the top of her lungs in disbelief, the sound of her scream echoing on the floors above.

A/N: As of last week, two MHA fic ideas came to mind: one is "Amazing Powers of Observation" (first chapter available on this very site), a (mostly) light hearted romance fic. The other one is the dumpster fire you are reading now.

Oh man, I'm gonna have fun writing this. Maybe more than you guys will have reading it, but no one is perfect.