*Whistles* Gotta admit. I might've had too much fun torturing characters with this one shot. I was reading another fic that mentioned something about a puppy Zoro and this kicked to life. Hope y'all enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it.
Added note: Tried to put this up yesterday and what do ya know the site went down! I hate captchas protocols.
Captain's Feral Puppy
He's always known his Captain is crazy. From the first time his best friend had blackmailed him to every time afterward where he's needed nothing more than a look to know where to plant his feet and swing his swords. Now, sitting in a dark corner of a bar downing a bottle of sake he can officially say his Captain's craziness has caught onto the rest of the crew. Or rather just the Navigator and the Sniper.
"Hey, did you hear?!"
A loud call from the bar shakes his thoughts. He closes his single eye, allowing his hearing to tune out his friends in favor of listening to the group surrounding the bar. Nothing new in his opinion.
"No, what?" Really he should expect no less from a group that drunk. Especially that group.
A glass shatters causing several men to laugh but over the ruckus he hears, "That Straw Hat, Pirate Hunter Roronoa Zoro just took down a ship single-handedly!"
For a minute the group at the bar falls quiet before another, louder round of laughter takes the drunken fools. The swordsman allows his lips to twitch in something between a snarl and a smirk. Shouldn't the fools know not to mess with his Captain and crew? He hadn't done more than obeyed Captain's orders.
"Ya say so? Damn if I didn't know better it would sound like that demon is some guard dog or something."
Guard dog? The scar on his eye itches. Typically that means one of two things. Either the shit cook is talking about him or he is aggravated. He calls it a gut instinct to say it's both. Still, he's a little more than half tempted to hear how this conversation goes. After all isn't it the First Mate's duty to ensure the safety of the crew in the Captain's absence? So what if he's taking more than a professional interest in their conversation?
"A guard dog? Bwahahaha!" Apparently, the others in their group find it funny too. On the other hand, his friends seem to have fallen quiet. Could they be just as interested in this conversation? "Just what in hell makes you think that Roronoa would be a guard puppy of all things?"
The other man chuckles, goes quiet then the swordsman hears a body thump against the counter. "Don't tell me you haven't noticed. You've been on enough ships with me. Surely you've noticed!"
Noticed what? His mind goes back through the months, from Punk Hazard to now, every ship they've come across. Scratch that. Every Marine ship they've come across. To the First Mate, nothing comes to mind. His strikes have been clean, every step and every Marine he's had to fight he's taken down without a problem. Then what's the issue?
Every Marine scattered around the bar appears to have cottoned onto the conversation for they fall into somewhat of a drunken quiet. "What do you mean?" A soul from somewhere on the opposite side of the bar speaks up. Zoro can practically hear the confusion dripping in the man's voice.
The first Marine, the leader of the conversation snorts. A rustle of cloth follows the sound and Zoro assumes the Marine has turned to look at the second. "You really haven't seen it, have you?"
Zoro opens his eye in time to see many of the gathered Marines shaking their heads. The Marine, a boy no older then maybe nineteen with buzz cut green hair a few shades lighter than the swordsman's own frowns, looking back and forth between his colleagues.
Sea-Green, as Zoro decides to call him, smirks, leaning forward as if to whisper a secret. "Roronoa Zoro is really the Captain's pet." He throws his head back with a hearty laugh at their confused expression and adds, "Why else do you think he never attacks unless Straw Hat Luffy says too?"
Beside him, Usopp blows a perfect spit-take nearly blowing their cover until the sea witch seated on the Sniper's opposite side spins a part of her staff. Zoro catches a murmur of "Mirage." from the Navigator which he knows to be a good thing. Especially with every Marine in the bar turning to look in their direction. They don't see past the mirage, turning back to Sea-Green and asking yet another question.
"So what? You're saying Straw Hat's First Mate is like some kind of feral dog?"
Sea-Green grins. "That is exactly what I'm saying." The swordsman growls, his hand inching toward Shusui's hilt. Itching to draw the blade and strike at the sea-green haired bastard. Only the reminder from Nami to stay quiet stills his hand. He really doesn't need his debt raised. "He's almost like a feral dog that only listens to his master. Why else would 'Pirate Hunter' Zoro of the East Blue be in the New World?"
Forget Shusui, the swordsman grips Kitetsu's hilt tightly. If the cocky Marine wants to see a rabid dog then Zoro's more than willing to sink his teeth into the man. He's about to do so until his Haki picks up on a familiar presence standing outside the bar. How he's not felt it earlier he doesn't know, but judging by the emotions flaring up in his Captain he has a feeling something bad and hopefully fun will happen.
Downing the rest of his drink the First Mate gets to his feet, gesturing his friends to follow him. Though confused, Nami and Usopp follow him. All three exit the bar without the Marines noticing, finding their Captain wearing a very unusually stoic expression.
"What are you gonna do?" Luffy tilts his head, looking the swordsman in the eye.
Zoro shrugs. "Up to you."
"Good, I have an idea." His Captain grins. The First Mate already has a bad feeling. Luffy's devious grin just makes it worse.
He doesn't miss the way Nami glances between them, a flare of confusion showing in her expression before she covers it up. None of their crewmates would understand— couldn't possibly understand—the way he and Luffy have always been able to communicate without speaking a word. It's something he himself can't quite describe. The bond he and his Captain have had since day one in East Blue.
It's this bond that leads him to trust his Captain with whatever the crazy nineteen-year-old plans to do. Somehow the swordsman has a feeling it's going to be just another way to mess with the Marines. Still grinning, his Captain turns to Usopp and Nami. "Usopp, can you find some felt and fur?"
The Sniper tilts his head, looking between Luffy and Zoro before shrugging. "Easy enough, but I don't have money to buy anything."
Luffy looks to Nami, his eyes going wide and round to plead with the Navigator. "Nami, can Usopp borrow some money? You'll make it back in the bets."
Zoro looks away. He out of everyone knows that when his Captain wants something all the teen needs to do is utilize the puppy pout as he and everyone else on the Sunny have so affectionately dubbed the expression. Not for the first time is he grateful he hasn't broken under the expression since their first few weeks together. In front of the others at least.
When he hears a loud sigh he looks back to find Nami reaching into the bag at her side. "Fine, but if I don't make it back I'm adding it to your debt, Luffy." His Captain just waves it away, a familiar gesture Zoro knows to mean that Luffy is absolutely positive his strange and eccentric plan will work.
When does it not?
The swordsman snorts, gaining Luffy's attention and the Straw Hat Captain turns back to him. "Let's go back to the Sunny. There's nothing fun to do here."
It isn't until later, when Usopp has returned to the ship with a small bundle of supplies that Zoro begins to worry about what plan his Captain has in store. He worries about it no more than usual though. After all, what can go wrong when the greedy navigator, the miniature inventor/prankster and the prankster champion himself get together?
Quite a bit actually.
Since the sun has set the Sunny has been on the move, already sailing toward the next island. Zoro, as is his way, is in the observatory working with his weights when he hears his Captain calling for him. He groans but gently sets the weights down, draping a towel around his neck before sliding down the ladder to the grass deck.
He doesn't even have to look before he begins heading in the direction of Usopp and Franky's lab. Where ever his Captain is he can find his way. Opening the door he scowls, his sole eye glaring at the trio. "What? You know I don't like being bothered while I'm training."
In return all his Captain does is grin. That's when he notices both Nami and Usopp sharing an malevolent grin. Usopp steps aside revealing a closed suitcase resting on the desk. He sets a hand on it, looking up at the swordsman. "Luffy here decided that since those Marines want to spread rumors we're gonna play with them a little."
His scowl turns into a frown and he crosses his arms over his chest. "Okay, but what does that have to do with me?"
"We can't tell you." To his dread Luffy giggles, bouncing back and forth on his rubber heels in excitement. "Not until you agree."
The First Mate narrows his eye. On any other ship agreeing before finding out the details would mean signing oneself over to Hell. On this ship, it means going along with all of the Captain's whims.
Didn't I agree to that at the beginning? Zoro wonders at the thought for a moment. That moment is all he needs to know there's no backing out of this. He shrugs. Might as well do it again.
"Fine," He growls. "I agree to whatever this stupid plan is."
Like that Usopp steps out of the way, allowing the swordsman to approach the suitcase. Warily he flicks open the clasps, glancing back at his Captain for a second before opening the case. Upon finding what is inside he groans, one hand rubbing his face in irritation.
Of all the things…
XxX
"Sail ho!" Half dozing as he is, back against the railing the First Mate really truly hopes said sail isn't a Marine. For once in his life, since he left his dojo Zoro doesn't want to fight a Marine ship. Not if means…
"What is it, Usopp?"
The First Mate keeps his eye closed, listening to their Navigator call out to the Sniper in the observatory. As the hatch opens a sliver of dread drives into his gut when he hears the liar's dark chuckle. Sure enough not two seconds later the Sniper is calling to him.
"Get ready, Zoro, it's your time to shine."
Damn it. With that thought in mind, the First Mate gets to his feet, a dark glare aimed at the long-nosed teen. "This better be worth it, Usopp or I'm throwing you overboard."
To his credit, Usopp doesn't squeak in fear like he would've once done. Instead, he grins, pressing his thumb to his nose. "Trust me. This'll be great for all of us."
Zoro grunts, shuffling over to the tree with the swingset. There he finds the suitcase Usopp and Nami had put together some weeks back for the next time they were to meet a Marine. He doesn't know if it's good or bad luck they haven't seen any Marine ships for the past few weeks but he does know that he's not the only one itching for a fight.
How good that fight is depends on the Marines.
Sliding the last part over his ears, the First Mate walks over to lean against the main mast, his swords a comforting weight on his hip. From there he spies the dark teal green ship sailing toward them off the port bow. If what he's seeing is to go by it looks like the ship is trying to ram them. Until it turns broadside, its starboard cannons firing once in range.
None of his crewmates move. No, they wait just as planned.
"Zoro." Even where his Captain stands on Sunny's head, the swordsman can hear the unspoken command. Fetch.
If it were anyone else, Zoro would slice them muscle by muscle and use them as fish bait for even thinking of ordering him around like a dog. But this is his Captain. He knows Luffy wouldn't treat him like an actual mutt. No. He'll go along with this game because it's fun and he wants to terrorize the Marines. As such he rushes the railing, one foot pushing off the white wood to launch him further into the air.
With only Wado in hand, he sends the cannonballs back at the Marine ship, relishing in their cries of surprise and anger. One of the cannonballs strikes the ship's mast, the blatant explosion toppling the tower. As it is, the ship is close enough for both sides to trade blows. Usopp firing from where he stands on Sunny's upper deck.
Landing to stand on the railing he grins when the attacking Marines freeze in their forward charge. That is how he knows they've finally noticed him. That is how he knows they've seen the furry tail attached to his haramaki by a thin leather belt, the black collar covered in short dull spikes, and the dyed dark green ears sitting blatantly on his head by a thin piece of metal wrapped in green fabric.
His grin darkens when he catches sight of the Marine that had been spouting the rumors staring at him in shock in the middle of the crowd. Beside him, he hears his Captain's sandals slap against the wooden railing. He can practically hear the laughter the raven-haired boy is trying to bite back.
"Zoro," Luffy grins, his eyes focusing in on Sea-Green. "Sick 'em." To add to their little game, the swordsman barks a short yap that makes the pale Marine take a step back in fright. That step is all the First Mate needs.
He lurches forward, his grin nearly demonic in his bloodlust.
XxX
Hinston Seamus, or Shay as his friends and family call him has always loved a good story. As a child, he would sit in front of the fire and listen to his Grandpap tell stories of his days as a young Marine sailing the open seas and fighting off the accursed pirate scum that would attack innocent civilians and raze entire towns to the ground.
So when he turned fifteen he sought to follow his Grandpap's steps, joining the Marines and working his way up the ladder to do great things. How could he not? The sea called to his blood, urging him to sail her beautiful and deadly waves. Now, fifteen years later as a Captain of his own ship—in the New World no less—he'd thought he'd seen all there is to see of the sea's mysteries. At least...that is what he'd thought until he heard of the Straw Hat Pirates.
Anyone and everyone from new recruits to retired vets has heard of the up and coming crew and their lunatic activities. More particularly that of Captain Straw Hat Luffy and his First Mate Pirate Hunter Roronoa Zoro. Who wouldn't when their very names have echoed across the seas since before they left the East Blue?
When Seamus had heard they'd entered the New World he'd known there would be a very good chance he and the men under his command would run across the crazy bastards. Which is part of why he'd ordered the men to dock in a town to restock for a longer than typical stint at sea.
He'd known the best way to come across the pirate crew would be to meet them on the sea. Something he hadn't taken into account though—as rookie as it sounds—would be that the Straw Hat Pirates had in fact needed to resupply as well. Seeing as the next island the log pose would jump to is over two months away, thinking back on it, he should've known they'd be stopping as well.
Anyway, as his Grandpap used to tell him, hindsight on the high seas is twenty-twenty.
After finding out the pirates had docked then left while his First Mate and crew were busy having fun at a bar of all the damn places they could be he'd sentenced each and every one them to some monotonous yet essential chore at one point or another in their trip and pushed the rest to chase after the brightly colored brig sloop at full speed. Either way it had taken a full three weeks just to catch up with the speedy ship.
Buuut…
Staring at the sight that greets him and his men with their ship pulled up alongside the pirate's he's not quite so worried about that anymore.
Those stories he so enjoyed as a child? He still enjoys them. When he goes to visit his wife and children he gets to settle down and tell his own, allows his children to hear of his own antics at sea. As such he may or may not have exaggerated a few details to make them more interesting but never, never in all his life would he think that an exaggerated tale could lead to this.
Rumors are sure to run amuck about any infamous figure, pirates no less. And yes, he'll be the first to admit that he's guilty of keeping half an ear to the tales. One of which being about the Straw Hat First Mate.
In fact...wasn't his own First Mate rambling something about the green-haired man being some kind of feral dog? Yes. He thinks dryly, eyeing the odd swordsman. A feral dog indeed. One capable of slicing our ship in half with one stroke of those swords.
Watching his First Mate backpedal at the swordsman's odd...attire, he has to say that the pirates have a sense of humor. He'd warned the damn blockhead that his mouth was gonna be the death of him. Particularly when it comes to riling up pirates of the New World.
The Marine Captain knows he should be down there with his men, attempting to fight off the swordsman, however, if he does step in how would his First Mate ever learn a lesson? What better to teach the numskull to keep his trap shut then a pirate? In fact, if he's counting right he'd say that it's rather lucky this is happening with Straw Hat then with another crew that may be less inclined to joke about such matters.
Pirates or not, Seamus now puts those tales to use, wandering over to the railing closest to where the raven-haired teen of a captain stands on the railing watching the green-haired swordsman play with his men.
He clears his throat, calling out the captain. "Straw Hat Luffy, I presume?" He knows who the boy is, he's seen the wanted posters, but he'd rather play the polite card then elicit more anger from the crew. Said captain tilts his head, acknowledging he's listening even if his eyes never leave the fight. "Could you be so kind as to call off Pirate Hunter Zoro?"
He will never admit it, but watching the young captain pull his eyes away from his swordsman to turn said dark eyes on him is nerve-wracking. Looking into the onyx depths he can understand why his superiors are afraid of a boy who can't be any more than eighteen years of age. There is a certain amount of—anger wouldn't be the right word—protectiveness mixed with something akin to dark amusement hidden behind a joyful grin.
Straw Hat frowns in mock confusion, an expression Seamus thinks would be able to fool many other people, Marines and civilian alike if it wasn't for the fact he has a pretty good idea of why the pirates are behaving like this.
"Ne, why would I do that?"
The Marine Captain bites back a sigh. What was it his GranGran had said? You catch more flies with honey than vinegar? He's really gonna have to pick his words if he's gonna get his First Mate out of this alive. Going by the fact that most of his crew is already laid out on deck he doesn't have much time left. Gods, he hopes they're just unconscious.
XxX
Luffy grins. He's enjoying watching how badly the entire ship is thrown off by Zoro's sudden change in appearance. Really, when he'd proposed the whole idea he just wanted to prank Zoro into wearing something like a dog costume. But after seeing how angry his swordsman actually was by the fact he decided that it would be a good chance to up his pranking game a tad bit.
While including Usopp in the matter may have defeated the purpose of beating the prankster at his own game it's still a good bit of fun for the whole crew. Particularly if Nami's bets are anything to go by.
Speaking of which, here comes the Marine Captain.
Luffy knows he's there, he knows the Captain is waiting for him to acknowledge him on a level akin to equal ranking but really, where would the fun be in that? The only Marines he would give that kind of greeting to are Smokey, Coby, and...okay Gramps doesn't count.
That there is a turn tail and run kind of situation.
"Straw Hat Luffy, I presume?" Luffy tilts his head, showing the Captain he's listening. He won't give much more than that though, not while he's itching to jump over and throw a punch or two with Zoro. He really really really wants to but he knows it would blow a hole through every bet Nami has made as well as increase his own debt exponentially.
Stupid Nami and her tangerines.
He's brought out of his drifting thoughts by the Captain speaking again, this time drawing more of his attention with what he considers to be a really stupid question. "Could you be so kind as to call off Pirate Hunter Zoro?" Why would he do that? Zoro looks like he's having a ton of fun. Frankly, he should be over there with him, having fun beating up the stupid Marines. He scrunches his nose, frowning in confusion as he goes through the agonizing steps of trying to figure out why he should end Zoro's fun. After a minute he looks at the Captain.
"Ne, why would I do that?"
To his credit, the Marine Captain doesn't get angry and yell like Sanji or Nami do when he gets confused. Instead, the Captain's shoulders slump in a sigh and he turns his chin to the fight. "Because my First Mate doesn't know when to keep his mouth shut and I have a feeling that may be why your swordsman is toying with him."
He's not wrong on that aspect, Luffy knows. Every other crew member that has come at the green-haired swordsman has been knocked out in a few seconds and yet Sea-Green, the one who started the whole problem is still up, desperately swinging his sword to block blows the raven-haired teen can tell are only half-hearted.
When the Marine stumbles, Luffy decides Zoro's had enough fun. After all, the Marine Captain is a lot nicer than Sea-Green or any others save possibly Smokey that Luffy has met since they entered the New World. Deciding it's gone on long enough, Luffy sticks his pinkies in his mouth emitting a loud wolf whistle.
His First Mate pauses with Sea-Green's sword locked between two of his and looks up at him. Locking eyes, Luffy tilts his head over his shoulder.
"Come on," The teen tells him. "this fight is done."
Zoro snarls, pushing on his swords. "He can go longer."
Luffy frowns, shaking his head. "No, this fight is over."
When the swordsman rolls his eyes, Luffy crosses his arms over his chest, arching an eyebrow at him. "If you don't finish it, I tell Sanji who really drank the wine he bought for Nami and Robin."
He knows the warning is clear in his words but his First Mate still pushes back. It's not the first time they've had arguments like this, after all, First Mates are supposed to balance out their Captain's own eccentricities, the same often going both ways. He and Zoro especially.
Finally, the green-haired First Mate gives in with a huff, unlocking their swords with a twist that sends Sea-Green to the deck even as he walks away returning his swords to their sheaths. The Marine Captain looks on in amusement and Luffy thinks in a spare thought that the man understands the conversation he and his First Mate just had.
Instead of bringing it up though, he merely nods. "Thank you, Straw Hat, I'll see to it my First Mate learns to keep his mouth shut in the future."
The teen shrugs. He doesn't care what the Captain does. All he knows is that Zoro had fun, his crew got a good laugh, and if he's to go by the sly look he glimpses on Nami's face then Zoro may have a chance to take a bite out of his debt. He turns away, trusting Sanji to watch his back.
"Set sail!" He wants to get out of here, leave the Captain to his own mess and continue on their adventures. His crew rushes to their stations, the Sunny pulling a good distance away from the Marine ship before Nami relaxes enough to pull her betting book out of her back pocket and begin calling out.
"Sanji, you owe Chopper three Cotton Candy sticks for the number of wounds. Usopp you owe Franky four bottles of cola for amount of damage and Robin," The navigator grins. "You owe me thirty thousand beris for the disobedience."
Zoro snorts, taking off the tail and ears and placing them back in the suitcase. "It was not disobedience." The collar remains around the swordsman's neck but Luffy makes no move to mention it. If his First Mate likes it then he has no reason to challenge it.
The Navigator waves off his comment, grabbing the bag of beris off of one of Robin's extra hands as she approaches the swordsman. "Actually I have a proposition for you, Zoro." Luffy can already tell Zoro won't want anything to do with it, not until she adds, "it's a way for you to reduce your debt."
That has him and the entire crew freezing to listen to her words. It's not every day the treasurer allows someone a chance to make a dent in their debt, especially if it's as large as Luffy thinks Zoro's is. With everyone there, they can serve as witnesses for such a rare moment.
Somewhat interested, Zoro arches his eyebrow. "Alright, witch, what is it?"
She grins. "Wear the puppy suit the next five times we fight Marines and I'll erase your debt."
The End
Grizzly out for the night.