Memories

Summary: When Merlin and Arthur found Gwaine in Ismere, the Diamair gifted Arthur with a stone filled with memories, not all his own…

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin and no profit is made from this work of fiction.

Chapter disclaimer: Words and scenes are taken from S01E07, S01E13, S02E01.

Chapter 1: A Gift

The creature before them smiled at Gwaine's reassurance that Merlin and Arthur were friends. For a moment, it looked like it was going to turn around and slip off into the depths of the caves but then it stilled and gave Merlin a deep penetrating look. Arthur glanced between the two but before he could discern the meaning of the look, the creature gave a slight bow and held out a hand to Arthur.

"A gift, great king. May this help you on your journey to becoming the king you are destined to be, the king of prophecy."

Arthur held his hand out to receive the stone but paused at the end of that sentence. Prophecy? Before he could ask, the stone was deposited in his hand and the creature quickly disappeared into the depths of the caves.

Arthur pocketed the stone, he did not have time right now to think about it, he had to save his knights.

Returning to Camelot, Arthur reported all that happened in Ismere to the council before retiring for the night. It was only as Merlin helped him undress that he remembered the stone the creature had gifted him with.

Taking it out of his pocket, Arthur stared at the stone as Merlin took a step closer.

"What is it?" Merlin asked.

"I'm not sure, perhaps we should ask Gaius."

Merlin nodded and without Arthur even asking, he went looking for the physician.

Arthur twisted the stone around and as he placed it on the table, an image appeared before him:

Arthur stood in a lake with a girl on his right and a man on his left. He was not moving, just standing between the two as they talked.

"Go, they are waiting for you." The man said. "I don't understand, you're coming too." The girl replied.

"Only one of us can pass through. This was never meant for me."

The girl looked shocked and tearful as she replied:

"I only wanted this so we could both return to Avalon."

"Your destiny is on a different path to mine. It is my fate to live a mortal life."

"I do not want to leave you."

"You must! Once the ceremony begins, you have to go through with it. The elders expect a soul. If they don't get his, they will take yours."

"Goodbye. I will never forget you." Sophia tearfully exclaims before taking Arthur's hand and leading him into the lake.

He remembers them now, Sophia had been a beautiful girl and Arthur had been quite taken with her. Yet, he did not remember any of this.

The image changed then, and Arthur could only look on in shock as Merlin made his way into the lake, screaming Arthur's name and diving down every few moments in search of him. How he knew Arthur was in the lake was a mystery, just as much a mystery as to where Sophia and her father had disappeared, but as Arthur watched, he could see Merlin dragging the Arthur in the image out of the water.

Arthur remembered that Merlin had caught up with him and knocked him out with a lump of wood in order to return him to Camelot safely, or at least, that's what he remembers being told.

"What was that?" Arthur turned to find his wife had come in at some time during the scene and held out his arms. "I don't know." He answered. "I don't know."

The door to his chambers opened and Gaius and Merlin entered. Arthur looked at them, then at the stone and picked it up.

"Do you have any idea what this is Gaius? It showed me an image just now, an image of Sophia and her father, you remember them?"

Both looked shocked at this information but Gaius moved forward and took the stone from where Arthur held it out.

"This holds powerful magic, your majesty, the runes inscribed on it are powerful indeed."

Merlin took a step closer, looking at it carefully. "Is it dangerous?"

Arthur looked to Gaius at the question, also wanting to know.

"I do not believe so. The stone holds memories, a lot of memories if I'm reading the runes correctly but they hold no danger to the one using it. The greatest danger would be if you acted on any of the memories without ascertaining their truth."

Arthur looked up sharply, "I know, Gaius. I would never do that."

Gaius nodded and handed the stone back to him.

"Then I believe that there is no need for me to tell you that you should put the stone in the vaults and never speak of it again." With a raised eyebrow, Gaius bowed and exited the room.

"I will take it down tonight, after bringing your supper," Merlin said as he gathered the lunch plates and goblet.

Arthur gave him a look before shaking his head. "No, no need. I'll take it down myself when I have the time."

The look Merlin gave him told Arthur that he was not fooled, that he knew Arthur had no intention of locking the stone up in the vaults.

"Be careful." Was all that Merlin said as he opened the doors and went to fetch supper for his King and Queen.

Arthur picked up the stone and with a last glance at the door, he turned it over again beckoning Gwen closer.

An image of Gaius and Merlin in the Physician's chambers greeted them.

"This is no ordinary beast, Merlin."

Merlin was holding a sword and turning it around in his hand. "Don't worry."

"No, listen to me, you don't understand." Gaius said as he walked closer with a book in his hands.

"Uther may not respect the old religion, but it is very real."

Merlin paid a bit more attention to Gaius then.

"To face a beast such as this, you must understand where it came from."

"What do you mean?" Merlin asked, still inspecting and cleaning the sword.

"At the very heart of the old religion, lies the magic of Life and Death itself. The questing beast carries that power. One bite, you die, and there is no cure."

The seriousness of the situation reflects in Merlin's expression.

Arthur stared at the image in puzzlement. Why on earth was he showed this? Before he could think on it further, the image changed.

Arthur and Gwen were quite confused at first, as it seemed the image started in the middle of a conversation, not the beginning.

"So you know what I've come to ask…" Merlin stated.

"Yes" a lady answered.

"Will you do it?" Merlin asked.

"I do not have the power to mirror life itself and yet give nothing in return."

"I know that a price will be asked." Merlin stated strongly.

"To save a life, there must be a death. The balance of the world must be restored."

"I willingly give my life for Arthur's". The conviction in Merlin's tone was clear to all.

"How brave you are, Merlin." The lady said with a mocking smile. "If only it were that simple."

"What do you mean?"

"Once you enter into this bargain, it cannot be undone." She answered instead.

"Whatever I have to do, I will do. His life is worth a hundred of mine."

The lady turned to the altar and suddenly held a gold goblet.

"The cup of life, blessed by centuries of powerful sorcerers. So that it contains the very secret of life itself. If Arthur drinks water from the cup, he will live."

Arthur and Gwen exchanged a troubled glance when they heard which cup it was.

Merlin slowly stepped up to the altar and took hold of the cup, his decision made.

The lady incanted something, it now clear that she was a sorceress, and it started raining.

Merlin collected the rain in the cup and the sorceress poured it into a small container.

"A bargain is struck." She said and grabbed Merlin's arm, a coy smile on her face. "I hope it pleases you."

The image ends there and Arthur waits for whatever happens next but no other image is forthcoming.

Frowning, he set the stone back on the table. It seemed that the more he watched, the more questions accumulated in his mind.

Why had Merlin done that? He could discern that it had been after he was bitten by the questing beast so he didn't wonder about when, just why?And how had Merlin survived? How had he even known where to go and what to do? The only explanation he could think of was Gaius.

That did not explain the outcome, however. He was fairly certain that the sorceress would have kept to the bargain, she would not have spared Merlin. Her words and sinister demeanor led Arthur to believe that she had indeed taken a life in order to keep up her bargain but it had clearly not been Merlin's life.

Arthur could not help but dwell on the thought that someone had died in his stead. Someone had taken his place when he should have been the one to die at the bite of the questing beast. This was not the same as a knight fighting in a battle for him, this was something deeper, something far more profound. It was something Arthur was decidedly uncomfortable with.

Merlin fluffed the pillows and pulled the blanket up before turning to pick up the breakfast tray.

Arthur watched in silence as his friend and servant cleared away the dishes. He wanted to ask Merlin a lot of questions but he didn't know where to start.

"In Annis's castle, you mentioned something." It was not quite what he wanted to say but it seemed this was what mind had decided on. Merlin stopped and turned to face him.

"Yes?"

"You said that you have many talents I fail to notice. Care to share some of them?"

Merlin's confusion cleared a bit but there was a hesitant expression on his face like he also didn't know what to say, where to start.

"It's nothing, I was just upset and rambling a bit. You know me." The smile on Merlin's face, sheepish, innocent and just a bit forced would have been enough to satisfy Arthur once but he had come to know Merlin well over the years and he knew there was more to it than that.

He wanted to push, to pry, but also knew that Merlin wouldn't answer. Merlin might be an idiot at times but once he clammed up about something, you couldn't get him to talk, no matter how you tried.

"Very well. That will be all, Merlin. Good night."

Merlin gave a half bow and exited.

Arthur waited for Gwen to return to their chambers. They had decided that the stone would not be put away in the vaults as Gaius suggested but that they would watch whatever memories it held together.

Arthur didn't look at Gwen as they watched the next scene, he knew what her expression would be.

Merlin was mucking out the stables and didn't notice when a smoking ball of some sort was thrown in behind him. It took mere seconds for him to fall over, unconscious while a man looked on from the window outside.

That same man released the horses. "Go on. Go and have some fun. Go on."

The horses raced down the street and, in the image, one of the guards pointed them out to Arthur.

Both King and Queen watched as the Arthur in the image crouched down next to where Merlin's head lay in a pile of dung. Arthur didn't have to watch the scene, he knew exactly what happened, but he couldn't help but cringe a bit at his own behavior. He had done what was necessary under the circumstances but knowing now what had really happened, he couldn't help but feel a bit guilty. He watched as this younger version of himself sent Merlin off after giving Cedric the honor of serving him that night.

The scene changed then and Arthur's guilt only increased as they watched.

Gaius cleaned Merlin's face as best he could.

"I am not an idiot." Merlin said softly.

"What happened?"

Merlin sighed and shook his head.

"I just want Arthur to trust me, and to see me for who I really am."

"One day he will." Gaius assured.

"When? Everything I do is for him and he just thinks I'm an idiot."

"Not everyone thinks you're an idiot.

Although, looking at you now…" Gaius continued with a smile and Merlin couldn't help but give a reluctant smile and chuckle as well.

Arthur and Gwen looked at each other, smiles on their faces. Yes, Arthur felt a little guilty at how he had handled the situation but he had learned since then that Merlin was not really an idiot, or, not only an idiot.

"You were a bit harsh with him, don't you think?"

"That was nine years ago! I know he's not an idiot and you know that I value his opinion. He had only been in my service for a little over a year at the time." It was a feeble excuse but Arthur had no other to give.

"I know, Arthur. I know you value him as a friend. And he knows it too, now."

Arthur took comfort in her words and in her arms, turning her toward their bed and slowly stripping them of their clothes.

"Enough about Merlin…"

End Chapter 1