"What the hell are they doing?" Kyle asked as he stood by Tweek, who is watching Craig and Stan having a silent argument or something through the window of the blonde's coffee shop. Stan is full on glaring while Craig has his arms crossed and staring at Stan with an unamused look on his face, but the glare is also evident if you look close enough.

"I have no idea." Tweek said, shrugging.

Kyle sighed, playing with his hair that he stopped hiding under his hat to finally have it styled to look more decent than a red afro. "Let's just go in, Tweek. Need any help?"

Tweek nodded after walking into his coffee shop and nodding at the employees who greeted him. "Can you just grab the coffees to the table after I make them? Craig only drinks his cold milk tea if I personally made it for him."

"Kay." Kyle said as Tweek went behind the counter and told his employees to let him make the coffees for his friends. The redhead turned back to observe their table. Kenny and Clyde are sitting at the side not really knowing what to do but send an expression that screams S.O.S. at Kyle from their booth.

"They better not fight at my coffee shop." Tweek sighed, setting a well-made cup of iced cappuccino for Kenny and a cup of iced latte for Clyde.

"I think Craig respects you too much to do that." Kyle smiles at Tweek. "I just wish they would stop bickering over every single little thing."

"They haven't stopped since elementary school." Tweek rolled his eyes, making Stan and Kyle's iced mocha. "I mean even when they hit puberty, they have to fight on who's the tallest, who's the strongest, who's the most handsome, who dresses the best, and last but not least, whoever has the biggest dick."

The Jew chuckled, seeing that not much about the people has changed even if they moved from South Park to a way sunnier place where there it isn't cold and snowy all the time. How they all ended up there together at the same place was too big of a coincidence.

Craig and Tweek definitely wanted to stay together and agreed to apply for the same University. Luckily for Tweek, his father took this chance to expand his coffee business. It seems bad, but at least he promised Tweek would get all of the profit from that coffee shop. It sucked for a while since Tweek has to sleep in the back of his coffee shop, and Craig was stuck in dorms with the most annoyingly touchy roommate who snores loudly in his sleep due to their financial conditions. But Craig eventually got enough money to actually buy a small but fancy enough loft for the both of them with the help of his mother's friend who's a real estate agent. Tweek always suspected that he got financial help from Token or his own parents. Sure, Craig did get help from both parties but he proved that he got help from Token some other way instead of directly asking the rich friend to borrow money.

Kyle took the chance to use his scholarship and the offer given to him for his amazing scores, so he's currently living in the University dorms. Stan just needed a change of scenery and figured he would go with his super best friend rather than his ex-girlfriend since he had no particular direction for his future goals.

Lucky for Clyde, his father was the one who decided to move so he got to tag along with his group of friends. Token merely moved because his father is willing to take him under his wing as an intern for studying law and the main office is in the same area as everyone was headed to. He's the only one studying in a different campus rather than with his usual gang.

As for Kenny, he has been wanting to get out of South Park for ages. So with the crazy amount of part-time jobs he did with his undying determination over the years, he managed to not only get a scholarship and an unconditional offer with the help of Kyle but also save enough to pay for the plane ticket to fly over and rent a place with Stan.

Kyle smiled at how everyone started their lives here. In fact, most of the people from South Park moved as soon as they are able to like they were running away from the plague. He can't believe they have been here for a full year and a half already. "Remember they were fighting about who has the best boyfriend when Stan and I just got together for barely a week?" He smiled at the memory of Stan confessing to him six months ago when they went out to celebrate the anniversary for when they became Super Best Friends.

"Oh, don't remind me." Tweek sighed exasperatedly. "That was after they competed on who has the most admirers even though Craig is both taken and gay."

"Yeah, and they technically forced us to compete with each other. Like which one of us is the cutest, sexiest, most caring as a boyfriend. Heck, they even argued about which one of us is the best bottom after their little quarrel about who's the best top in the sack." Kyle added. "Eventually resulting in just competing for the best gay couple."

"Has that ever even ended?" Tweek said after finishing the last two cups. "There was nothing to compete about...You know why. They are just bullshitting for the sake of being competitive." The redhead groaned, nodding. "You have to admit though. The extra affection was pretty nice even if it's just for the sake of pissing each other off."

"You mean overwhelming." Kyle took a tray and helped take the cups of coffee to their table.

Tweek took a brownie for everyone and a cheesecake for Craig and sat by his boyfriend, snapping his fingers in front of said boy's face. "Hey, I'm over here."

Craig snapped out of the glare and turned to his boyfriend. "Sorry babe...Marsh was being unreasonable."

"I'm being unreasonable?!" Stan exhaled aggressively through his nose. "You're the one being a dick, Tucker!"

Kyle shoved Stan's shoulder before sitting down. "Shut up, Stan. You're supposed to be twenty, and you're acting like you're ten again."

"Why would I change, Ky?" Stan took his coffee and took a sip.

"At least be a little more mature and act your age." Kyle fixed Stan's red and blue cap. Even after all these years, Stan and Craig never replaced their signature headwear colors, claiming they would look too much alike when they do not wear any headwear, and other people getting their identities mistaken is not something they want happening at all.

"I am mature. It's just that someone is just way more immature than I am!" Stan side-eyed Craig, who is being completely distracted by his boyfriend.

"Thank god for Tweek's presence." Clyde sighed in relief. "And I get to see the rare moments of Craig making goo-goo eyes. OW!" He rubbed his shoulder from being punched by his best friend. "Jeez, he won't admit it." He dodged another punch and ended up getting the finger instead.

Kenny, who ditched his orange parka since a long time ago, pat Clyde's back. "I feel ya. Though technically I always see Stan's vulnerable moments." He then coughed and muttered very quickly, "Like when Wendy ended it." and coughed again.

Stan glared at Kenny before returning to his boyfriend. "Yes, she was the one who kept on ending it. I don't know why she won't leave me alone now that I'm dating Kyle."

"She probably thought you'd go back to her as usual." The Jew rolled his eyes. "I've been on her list ever since we let people know we're together. Though I never took Wendy as such a vengeful girl. She's still trying to find ways to sabotage me even though she's in miles away from us." Kyle sighed. "Have you seen her threatening posts on my coonstagram whenever I post anything related to us? Or even not related to us and she thinks I'm boasting about us somehow? She and Cartman would go well together with how manipulative they are, twisting our words and all that."

"She's a stubborn one." Kenny added, drinking his drink.

"Oh, please." Clyde said. "She hates you so much that she's giving Crag ideas to sabotage you."

Stan caught Craig's smug look for a split second before hearing Clyde continue. "But because Craig is a reasonable person, he didn't do any of what she told him." The brunet unlocked his phone to read out some examples. "Like this one." He cleared his throat and put on the girliest voice he can manage. "'Hey Craig! You hot stuff! I know you despise Stan Marsh and I have a few ideas for you.'"

Kenny read over Clyde's shoulder. "To which Craig replies…" He put on his best Craig Tucker impression. "'I am fully capable of pissing Marsh off on my own.'"

"'But just hear me out, ok? I hate him just as much as you do. I was thinking maybe you can piss him off by using this picture I've made of Kyle kissing David Rodriguez?'" Clyde showed everyone the picture, it's not even a good edit and David is nowhere near them which just makes it ridiculous.

Tweek giggled at Clyde and Kenny roleplaying the texts as Kenny replied with an overly dramatic monotonous voice, "Why would I do that when I can just show up next to him and have the same result?"

Kyle burst out laughing while Tweek hid his giggles behind his palm.

Stan scoffed. "What are you, Tucker? A teenage girl sending screenshots to her best friends?"

"We find stuff to make fun of, Marsh." Craig said simply. "The Craig's Gang group chat never died unlike your own."

"We're happy with what we have and grew up, unlike you!" Stan retorted.

"You two should stop fighting. What is there to be competitive about anyway? You two have different interests, different personalities, different beliefs, different talents, yada yada yada." Tweek listed off.

"Yeah, Craig likes space so he's studying aerospace engineering. Stan likes animals so he's studying zoology." Kyle added. "Craig is stoic and ice cold the majority of the time to everyone besides his guinea pig and Tweek. Stan is so emotional that the ex jock even hung out with the emos once."

"They were goths, Kyle." Stan corrected.

"What's the difference?" Kyle rolled his eyes.

"Pete said emos are posers." Tweek shrugged. "That goth darkness is nihilistic whereas emo is cynical."

"Wait, I thought goths were cynical." Stan wondered.

"Pete made it clear to me that emos are cynical." Tweek clarified.

Clyde chuckled. "Then Craig would make a great emo if he wasn't the most apathetic and deadpan person I know."

"You talk to one of them?" Craig asked the more serious question, ignoring the brunet.

"Actually, three of them moved here a month ago. They all work at this cafe for the night shift." Tweek explained. "Well, except for Pete. He left about a month ago to pursue his career when he had the chance of becoming an intern. Michael and Henriette are just looking for extra cash so they stayed here while still studying. I heard Firkle stayed in South Park."

"Well, the bottom line is Craig and Stan should stop competing over nonsense." Kyle clarified. "There is no point for them to be arguing over anything."

"Yeah!" Tweek agreed.

"Oh no no no, my dear Tweek and Kyle." Kenny ignored the possessive glares. "You don't get it. They do this, not only because they were once from two gangs in elementary school and listed the hottest boys in high school, but also because they practically look like each other."

"What?" Kyle took in the general details between Craig and Stan. "No, they don't!"

"They totally do." Clyde agreed. "So, it ends up like the twins trying to one-up each other all the time."

"But they already have siblings." Tweek said.

"Correction, I have an older sister. Which makes me the sweeter, non-forceful, unaggressive one between the two of us." Stan stated.

"Which also explains why Cartman was practically the one leading the gang back then though you claim you're the leader." Craig added, causing Clyde to snort. "Unlike you, little brother." The stoic boy said with the same slight tone of smug. "I am born to lead since I have a younger sister who I have not only known but also helped my parents raise most of my life with my tremendous leadership skills as an older brother."

"Enough enough!" Kyle held Stan back before he can retort. "Look, you two are completely different people. Anyone who knows you two well enough should be aware of the difference."

"Yeah, and I don't love Stan like I love you." Tweek smiled sweetly at Craig, earning him a kiss on his forehead. "And I'm pretty sure Kyle won't love Craig even if Stan started dressing up like him."

Kenny raised a brow. "Now that's an idea. Having these two change clothes."

"What?! No!" Stan exclaimed, slamming his hands onto the table.

"As if he can handle my style." Craig said, petting Tweek's hair.

Clyde shook his head. "No, I'm pretty sure you guys will just look like alternate versions of each other."

"I honestly don't think they look alike at all." Kyle said as he ran a hand through his curls.

Kenny sighed and gave Clyde a look. Clyde caught it and nodded, suddenly tugging off Craig's dark blue beanie as Kenny snatched Stan's cap off at the same time.

"Hey!" The two shouted in unison, glaring at their friends.

"You see?" Kenny gestured to the hair.

Tweek shook his head. "No, even if they have the exact same color, Craig has flawless shiny hair. It has more volume, it's floofier. It's slick, it's soft, it's smooth, and it's brushed neatly to one side. Even Clyde asks Craig about the secret to his hair."

Craig smirked while Clyde ran a hand through his mess of small brown curls on the top of his head. Clyde had adapted to the kpop pretty boy look after hanging around the Asian girls too much during high school, and he knows Craig's hair is something the noirette is extremely proud of. Which was why he asked Craig for advice to keep his hair floofed up. Ever since Tweek first ran his fingers through Craig's hair and never stopped complimenting about it, he took even better care of his naturally perfect hair just for the blonde.

Kyle, who never really paid attention to the difference between Craig's and Stan's hair can't help but notice it once Tweek mentioned so. "Hey yeah...Stan's hair has messy bangs that don't exactly go anywhere and is much thinner." He giggled at Stan's pout. "Aw, don't pout, Stan. Some things are just true instead of opinion."

"Ok, you two can obviously tell the difference because you two are dating the infamous 'twinsies'." Clyde laughed at the sour look he got from said people. "But can everyone else do the same?"

"Actually, this can be a good way to test people." Kenny chuckled at his idea. "Even your own boyfriends to see if they do love you for your personalities."

Tweek and Kyle raised their brows. "Are you doubting us? Seriously, Kenny?" The redhead rolled his eyes and leaned on Stan's shoulder.

"Craig and I have been dating since elementary school. I know him like the back of my hand." The blonde said with a look of indifference, something he has been heavily influenced by Craig over the years.

"And Stan and I have been friends since we wore diapers before dating. I know him like the inside of my eyelids." Kyle added with a determined look on his face. "I think that is self-explanatory."

Just then, Bebe walked by and immediately ran to Tweek. "Hey guys!"

"Hey gorgeous~" Clyde said, wiggling his eyebrows.

Bebe rolled her eyes and ignored Clyde but her face held a small smile. "Tweek, your brownies are superb! The girls and I bought two for each of us! It's our cheat day for our diets."

"Thank you." Tweek smiled, grateful for the compliment. "I made those just this early morning."

"Yeah, and I was hoping you can bring some of your amazing baking to my reunion party tomorrow. If you could?"

"Well uh...I don't know." Tweek rubbed the back of his neck, scooting closer to Craig. "Who did you invite anyway?"

"I invited you guys, some friends I made from my acting classes, some of their friends, and heck, I even extended invites to people from South Park who said they might be around!" Bebe replied.

"That's...so many people!" Tweek already started worrying about how much of a batch does he have to make.

"Oh come on, Tweek! Please? We need some sort of dessert on the food table and you know how store-bought stuff is no match for your amazing baking!" Bebe pleaded. "We just need a little bit more on the sugary table other than cheesecake and cookies and even jello shots."

"I thought your parties only have one theme and it's pure alcoholic drinks of all sorts." Kenny said.

"It's when someone got terribly sick that I learned drinking alcohol on an empty stomach is terribly bad. So, I'm providing food this time so I won't get in trouble again." Bebe explained. "Please Tweek, please? I promise I'll pay you!"

Tweek relaxed in Craig's arms that are wrapped tightly around him. "Fine...but I hope I get some help. Isn't easy making such a huge batch."

"I'm sure these guys would love to help you!" Bebe said with a big grin while gesturing to the people sitting at Tweek's table before switching to a threatening menacing expression. "Or they're not invited to another one of my parties ever."

"It's not like I care." Craig mumbled.

She then grinned again saying, "Thanks guys! Nice NASA t-shirt, Stan!" And walked off to her table.

Craig's right eye twitched as he emitted a low growl from his chest, flipping Clyde and Kenny off after both of them shouted 'I told you so' in unison.

"I, for one, can't believe she said that." Stan palmed his forehead. "It's no secret that Craig is a dork for space." That earned him the middle finger. "And he's holding Tweek. Anybody who lived in South Park for even just two weeks is aware how whipped Craig is for Tweek."

"Excuse me, it's called 'love', Marsh." Craig retorted. "And I love Tweek with every fiber of my being."

"Gross." Stan gagged.

"Then loving Kyle is gross, too?" Tweek spoke up, surprising everyone.

Kyle turned to Stan with a frown. "Yeah Stan! Is loving me so gross?"

Tweek can feel Craig's stare full of pride directed at him. "Craig, don't look at me like that." He muttered, shy.

That is until Stan thought quick and replied with the most smoldering and charismatic look he can put on, "If that's the case, I'll be gross with you."

"Aw~" Kyle cooed as Stan internally sighed in relief. "Well anyway, obviously Bebe was trying to get on Craig's nerves for his statement. She isn't that stupid." He said, snuggling up to Stan after said boyfriend pull him closer.

Clyde shook his head while Kenny rolled his eyes, both guys snickering at each other. "Why are we single, Clyde?"

"Because we aren't as notoriously gay as these two." Clyde answered. "You know what the girls always say. The good guys are always famous, gay, or taken. We aren't any of those. I'm straight. You're pan." He and Kenny burst out laughing after high fiving each other.

"You just love pussy." Craig said simply.

"Correction. I love women. If I get into a committed relationship, then I'll just love woman." Clyde explained as if he's making the most sense in the world. "And that would be too big of a responsibility and commitment for me."

Craig scoffed, knowing Clyde has the biggest crush on a certain curvy blonde girl who also moved to LA with them. Her reason? She wanted to become an actress, basically very self-explanatory.

"Too bad we don't all have the luxury of both being gay and forcefully paired together with the love of our lives since young." Kenny sighed dramatically. "Our lives are so hard."

"Yes, being swarmed by girls from everywhere after you set up your so-called modeling coonstagram is very hard." Stan rolled his eyes. "I'm sure all the attention towards you two is suffocating."

"Actually, that coonstagram account is managed by Token and includes me, Kenny, and our beloved homosexual Craig." Clyde clarified. "And would you believe it or not, the one that gets the most likes and comments and declarations for more from girls is the one that isn't even interested in girls." He sighed dramatically.

"I don't blame them though." Kenny chuckled. "I'd go for Craig if he wasn't taken. Boy got a hot bod. No doubt he's also got a package on him. Remember when we hit puberty for a while and Cartman dumped water all over Craig in the boys' locker room for some sort of revenge, and he was only wearing his boxers? That fucking bulge! Imagine his size now! Tweek's hella lucky."

Tweek squeaked and hid his face into Craig's chest, flushed. Craig chuckled lightly as he pet his boyfriend. "That's for us to know and for you to never find out."

"I thought you two fought over penis sizes." Kyle looked at Stan with a curious expression.

"We never really measured each other for clarification. I mean, that's just indecent, even if we do hate each other" Stan explained with a shrug.

"Oh but I wanna know who wins." Clyde smirked. "And it's up to the most truthful people of this table to tell us winner!"

"What are you talking about?" Craig seriously wonders why he's best friends with this guy.

"And the people who are going to give us a winner aaaaare…..!" Clyde spoke like some game show host as Kenny cooperated with a drumroll. "Tweek and Kyle!"

"Huh?" Tweek and Kyle looked at each other then back to Clyde, beyond perplexed.

"Look obviously you two have been fucked by these two. No doubt. No question. I once heard their fuck session after Craig forgot to hang up his phone after a slight stutter saying he's busy, and I saw hickeys on the inner thighs when Kyle was wearing shorts and fucking limping down the hallway." Clyde started, not ashamed to admit he was the witness of the proof of these two couples fucking. "So it's only logical for you two ukes to know how big your semes are."

"Did you just use the terms we learned from the whole Asian girls drawing Craig and Tweek fiasco?" Kenny laughed, giving Clyde another high five.

"It's better than saying 'the ones getting it in the ass' and 'the ones thrusting it in'."

Kyle palmed his face in his hands while Tweek's mind is desperately trying to figure out a way to get out of that seat without being noticed that he just abruptly left...which is impossible.

"Or just top and bottom would work, Clyde!" Kyle shouted, face as red as his hair.

"You can top by being a bottom, Kyle." Kenny said, with a smirk. "I bet Tweek is one kinky power bottom." He chuckled, followed by Clyde's wolf whistle.

Craig's face slightly turned red but Tweek is practically trying to dig into Craig and hide inside the guy. "Will all of you please shut up?!" Tweek's shouted but his voice muffled.

"He didn't deny it." Kenny smirked with Clyde.

"Soooo? Do we get any answers?" Kenny asked Tweek and Kyle again.

Kyle simply glared with his face flushed while Tweek continued pressing his face onto Craig's chest, but held his middle finger up, making Craig even prouder.

"I'll bet Tweek is a size queen. With how tall and naturally buff Craig is, no doubt he's huge." Clyde said. "Makes me kinda jealous. I had to work hard to get this bod." He flexed.

"You say as if Stan and I weren't at the gym with you." Kenny said with a snort. "I've seen Stan in the changing room, he's a decent size himself."

"Can we stop talking about penis sizes please?!" Kyle exclaimed, palming his face. "I'd like to enjoy my drink without dicks in my mind!"

"As if you mind it when it's Stan's…" Kenny smirked as Kyle groaned.

Suddenly, a notification ding came from Clyde's phone, luckily ending the talk of penis sizes for Tweek and Kyle. The brunet pulled out his phone and turned on coonstagram. "Check it out. Token just told me that he got the editing done with Craig's latest shot." Clyde said, going to the profile that was Token's business account. The gallery just shows all of Token's photography products and accomplishments, while the aspiring models each have a separate business account of their own apart from their personal one, the galleries filled with shots taken by Token and even other modeling gigs they accepted.

Clyde's shots have a theme of sports and other activities that practically is himself boasting how superior he can be compared to other guys. He poses with all sorts of balls, rackets, his medals, his trophies, and sometimes his uniforms. He even has some custom made jerseys and letterman jackets all themed around him and him alone. His expressions have a combination of determination and very sunshiney optimism. This all gave him the nickname of 'The Jock' which doesn't come out as a surprise.

Kenny's often include a drink, either alcohol, coffee, or even just plain water. He sits, sometimes looking gloomy or thinking when holding anything, even a flower, or sometimes smirking while looking at a Playboy magazine. While he stands, he's either carrying a weapon with blood or wearing battle scars or both. He hasn't smoked ever since he graduated high school for he doesn't want to be the one encouraging other people and being a bad influence, especially for his younger sister. Yet, his bad boy reputation built from coonstagram made him sometimes require to pose with a fake cigarette just for fulfilling purposes. He then got the nickname 'The Deviant' after that. Needless to say, it worked better than expected.

Craig's pictures, in general, are posed very well with his toned body, long limbs, broad shoulders, but the same stoic facial expression, giving him the nickname 'The Ice Prince' from coonstagram when Craig himself is pretty sure it should have been 'The Asshole' to which he friends all agree. Most of his pictures he looks like he's being captured without him noticing. Craig doesn't look at the camera, suggested by Token since he generally looks like the camera offended him someway, and he doesn't purposely pose. He does glance sometimes, giving the feeling that he knows but he doesn't care, which the fans dig. However, when it comes to formal wear, Craig is usually the one pulling it off out of the three, even if all of them look good in dress shirts and form-fitting dress pants. Craig, himself, just gives off a very noble person of high class in formal wear. Sometimes, Kenny joins him and one gets portrayed as the ice cold wealthy successor and the other would be the rich fun quirky playboy that people see a lot from stories.

Modeling is like roleplaying for them in a moment to be who they aren't, which is fun. Kind of like playing pretend under the camera. Kenny can escape his life is being just the poor guy of the group, though he doing very well for himself now. Clyde can become all of the people who he dreams to be in front of the camera. And Craig can escape the boring reality that is life. If Craig only can bring Tweek into this world, he can't imagine how many things he'd want to do with his lovely blonde boyfriend.

"But of course, we must have his number one fan do the honors of liking and commenting first." Clyde chuckled, noticing how Tweek's trying to take a peek. "Hey, Token, tag Tweek first before posting, will ya? His eyes might just pop off and roll onto my phone." He said, sending a voice message.

Tweek gasped and pulled out his phone, tapping on the messenger app, and sent Token his own voice message. "Do not do that! Everyone will end up stalking my private account! I'll just stay on the app be there when you post!" He constantly refreshed the page on the coostagram app to be the first to like and hopefully comment. Craig is his boyfriend after all.

Craig watched in amusement as Tweek flinched at the notification sound and let out a squeak as his phone shaking hands stumbled to tap on the new post and quickly double tapped on the picture before leaving a heart in the comments.

"Did you even look at the picture, Tweek?" Kenny laughed when Tweek set his phone face down only to immediately pick it back up.

The blonde's breath hitched as his eyes landed on Craig's eyes on the photo staring straight at him. He had the same stoic face and piercing icy blue eyes penetrating through his beating heart. Tweek's pupils dilated at the photo of Craig in just a blue flannel with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and top three buttons undone, his long legs covered by black ripped skinny jeans matched with blue and black high tops. His hands are stuffed into his jeans pockets, but his thumbs hung out. The raven black hair was styled up, on his wrist is a black watch, and on his right ear has a black stud with the words 'FUCK YOU' on it.

By the time he realized he's not alone and is out in public with his friends, comments and likes have overflowed the post. Plus, Stan and Kyle also have their phones out on the same page.

"Damn Craig!" Kyle exclaimed, ignoring Stan's glare and pout.

"He says that about every single picture of Craig." Kenny pointed out, adding fuel to Stan's fire.

"This is the simplest and most casual outfit we've ever done on Craig. And believe it or not, we found all these clothes from his own closet." Clyde explained.

Tweek immediately turned to Craig with a questioning look. All he ever saw Craig wear are dark colored t-shirts about space and old jeans when he's not modeling or going out for something special. He didn't mind, though it's disappointing how Craig doesn't try to look good for him.

Craig merely shrugged. "I was visiting my family once day and Tricia had some sort of stupid show and tell thing and I became her target. She said she doesn't want me to embarrass her, so she persuaded mom to take me on some shopping spree bullshit."

Tweek giggled. "I bet your mom was elated, especially after you became a model. She's been dying to change your wardrobe ever since you picked your own clothes."

"You're one to talk, wearing the same color and same buttoned up shirt with the same color jeans and the exact same shoes every single day." Craig retorted, but still monotonous.

"Well! It's not like my parents care! And I don't like you buying stuff for me! I'll feel guilty!" Tweek pouted. That answered why Craig doesn't dress up because the blonde himself doesn't dress up. But it's not like he can with his limited amount of clothing and he doesn't know how to dress up. Craig becoming a model only gave him too much pressure about his clothes and Craig knows that hence why Craig still looks to be as average as he can be and donate most of his fancy clothes away.

"And you don't spend your own money." Craig added. "What am I to do with you? I'd like to spoil you with things and you never gave me a chance. And we've been dating for years. It's not like money is a problem for me right now." He said, proud of the accomplishment he made with his modeling career thanks to that fateful day when Token had the idea of starting a coonstagram modeling account for the sake of his photography class project. Not only is he getting gigs, earning money easily not really having to do anything, but he was able to afford his own place with instead of living in the crowded lousy dorms, and away from his dad who cares a little too much about his relationship. Not to mention he is able to get Tweek to stop sleeping in the backroom of his coffee shop.

"Then don't bother asking for his permission." Stan rolled his eyes. "Like I do with Kyle and he loves it in the end."

Kyle blushed but glared at his boyfriend. "You make me sound so materialistic."

"Then this just proves you don't know how stubborn Tweek can be." Clyde chuckled.

Kenny scrolled through the comments of Craig's post since said male never ever cared about what happens after his shot. But a couple of comments caught the orange blonde's eye. "Clyde, check this out."

Clyde looked over and smirked. "This is a fantastic idea!" He showed the comment to Craig. "Craaaaaigypoo~ this might just be your dream come truuuue."

"Don't call me that." But Craig read the comment regardless.

"So? What do you say, buddy?" The brunet grinned his crooked grin.

Craig went quiet. Of course, he would be up for it, and that also means he can spend Token's money on Tweek, but he wouldn't show that. "If Tweek's ok with it."

"Aw, even asking for his permission." Kenny tsked, shaking his head. "These two are hashtag couple goals."

"Please don't talk like that." Stan commented.

"For once, Marsh and I agree on something."

Tweek tilted his head curiously. "What is it?"

"How would you like to be a part of this modeling coonstagram account, Tweek?" Clyde asked, shoving his phone into Tweek's face only to be pushed away by Craig.

"What? As what? Account managing?"

"They meant to ask you to model with him, Tweek." Kyle clarified.

"Yeah, what Mr. Know-It-All said." Clyde nodded. "Some of Craig's fans wanna 'meet' you. What better way to introduce you than have you model by Craig?"

Tweek went silent for three seconds. "W-WHAT?!" He shouted, not caring the whole cafe can hear him. He practically owns the place he can do whatever he wants. "I can't do that! I might just ruin all the progress you guys have made on that account! I'm-I'm...I'm not a looker like any of you guys!"

"That's not true, Tweek. You're adorable. Something that's completely missing from their account, to be honest. You'd definitely spice things up. What's even better is that you're Craig's boyfriend. That's like the perfect kind of promotion for the account, the partnerships, and your relationship." Kyle commented.

"Why would they need to promote their relationship?" Stan asked, giving his boyfriend a weird look.

"Have you forgotten how they ended up together?" Kyle glanced at Craig and Tweek with a knowing smile. "They are the perfect gay couple to the point where everyone accepted their relationship from the start. And I'm sure when they introduced Craig as a model, his character sheet would have said he's taken and gay. People have been curious from the start."

"Oh gawd, when we hadn't turned off the private messaging for our new modeling persona account, we received so many dick pics AND videos for Craig, calling him daddy." Kenny laughed. "I'll admit some of them look really good though. I even saved some into my own phone."

"You're a fucking pervert, Kenny. You better watch it in case those pictures are from a minor." Kyle rolled his eyes. "But what I'm saying is can you imagine the hype and popularity that account will get if Tweek joins in?"

"Now I'm definitely up for Tweek joining. Token did mention that one of the companies whose theme are along the line of feminine and pastel goth, or something... want to sponsor us? Obviously, none of us three would be wearing something like that. Token wants someone slender and not as bulky and broad as we are, and he kept emphasizing gender doesn't matter. Tweek is perfect! He's all curvy and petite and dainty with a pretty face! Craig's words, not mine." Clyde added, pointing at Craig.

Craig sighed through his nose, watching Tweek's anxiety slowly creep out again. He laid his chin on top of Tweek's head, hugging the blonde tightly. "It's ok if you don't want to, Tweek. But you agreeing would have made me soooo happy."

Tweek chewed on his lower lip, contemplating about it. He has never done such a thing before and is very worried that he will be the cause of the coonstagram account, and Token's hard work of being a photographer. "I'm...not sure."

Stan suddenly choked from being elbowed by his boyfriend so he'd say something, though he doesn't why he himself has to be involved in this but Kyle is always willing to 'help' people...by that Stan means be extremely nosy even when it doesn't concern him. He cleared his throat, slightly glaring at Kyle. "I think it doesn't hurt to try things, Tweek. I mean, you own this coffee shop here in LA. And from that, you both tried and succeeded in drama and piano. I've heard all about how you influenced Craig to try for himself from Clyde."

Clyde pretended he's busy typing on his phone so he can hide from Craig's glare.

"Now I know Craig is fluent in sarcasm because it's practically what he speaks since he was out of the womb, but now he's actually starting fuckin' Mandarin in addition to knowing how to play bass and sing. I didn't even know the fucker can actually sing!" Stan glared at Craig. "Slow the fuck down, will ya? How am I supposed to beat you in so many things?"

"Not my problem. And you play the guitar, shut up." Craig said monotonously. "Besides, you got the whole damn school to sing your 'Make Bullying Kill Itself' song. And somehow got me to be one of the main singers walking backward facing the camera. How can you not know I can sing?"

"I remember. I was also one of the main singers!" Clyde reminisced.

"You both were only chosen so your low and nasally voice would work with the harmonics or whatever." Stan grumbled. "Who knew that puberty would also slightly smooth out that voice of yours."

"I know right? He sounds all sultry and charismatic now." Tweek giggled with a slight blush. "But I'm more surprised how none of you guys tripped backward in the recording process of that music video. I'm glad I was just standing at the side." He added.

"All I remember are nightmares of Cartman in a dress." Kenny said.

"Do not remind me!" Clyde groaned. "It was horrifying! I mean the makeup wasn't bad but it scarred me for life!"

Craig held back a shudder at that memory. Cartman wouldn't leave him alone dressed like that when he was chatting with one of the Raisin Girls because he needed to make sure Clyde wasn't being an idiot. He shook his head, needing to change the topic. "Babe, you think you can help me with this Chinese poem I'm trying to learn tonight?"

"After I measure exactly how much ingredients that I need for the brownies, sure!" Tweek smiled.

However, Kyle was both confused and in awe, focused on some other factor that was mentioned. "No, wait! What's this about-when in the world did you start learning Mandarin?"

"About the same time Tweek was invited to that opera house for playing the piano for a ballet show." Craig answered.

"I never saw you near a Chinese character before." The redhead retorted.

"I haven't gotten writing down yet. The pinyin does make speaking easy though." Craig shrugged.

"I've never heard Craig speak mandarin before." Kenny spoke with interest. "How about showin' off a little, bud?"

"He speaks like he's from the place." Clyde pointed out.

"I'm gonna need proof. No doubt you wanna prove to Stan that you're not bluffing, right Craig?" Kenny said with a cheeky grin.

"Fuck off, McCormick, but fine." Craig said, noticing Tweek's look of anticipation. "What do you want me to say?"

"How about describing each of us in one sentence?" Kyle suggested.

Craig rolled his eyes. "Fine. 克莱德是个无聊的白痴。肯尼是个色情变态。凯尔脾气火爆。斯坦只是我的A货。"

Everyone except Tweek stared at Craig in disbelief. "The fuck did you say?" Clyde broke the silence.

"He said Clyde is an idiot. Kenny is a perverted retard. Kyle has anger issues. And Stan is a bad copy of him." Tweek explained then turned to pout at the noirette. "What about me?"

"你是我家看似很纯洁的小恶魔。" Craig smirked.

Tweek immediately smacked his boyfriend's shoulder, lightly blushing. "Shut up!"

"I do not have anger issues!" Kyle shouted.

"No, Ky. You pretty much do have an anger problem." Stan said, dodging Kyle's swing of fists. "But I am not a fucking copy of you!" He shouted as well, to which Craig ignored.

"Wait! First of all, how the hell do you know what he's saying?" Clyde looked perplexed, as he ran his fingers through his hair. "I thought Craig was the only one who was learning Mandarin."

"Craig sometimes needs help when he wants to make sure he memorized them correctly and apparently it's really easy to get roped in." Tweek explained. "I learned to listen, but not read or speak."

"That's great." Kenny said with a hint of sarcasm. "But what did Craig say to you?"

Tweek blushed even harder. "Um...well if directly translated, he would be saying 'I'm his seemingly innocent little devil'." He tried to ignore Craig's chuckle. "But I'm pretty sure the actual meaning was 'minx'."

Kenny snickered. "He's not wrong at all. Have you seen yourself in a mirror, Twitchy? You got that beautiful figure going on. I don't mind dying from being crushed by your thighs and suffocated from your ass."

"You have a death wish, McCormick?" Craig growled, glaring daggers at Kenny. "If you eye up my boyfriend again, I won't hesitate to gouge your eyes out and feed them to my guinea pig."

"Can you really blame me though?" Kenny smirked.

Tweek, meanwhile, is hiding his face into Craig's chest, face flushed pure red. "Please don't feed Kenny's eyes to Stripe."

Craig flipped Kenny off and buried his fingers into Tweek's hair.

"You two are too damn cute." Clyde stared at them with his glossy sparkling fanboy eyes. "But back to the matter at hand, Tweek. What's your answer?"

Tweek stayed hiding but then pulled away. He pondered for a moment, looking at Craig then turning his head and raising a brow at Stan with a slightly crooked smile on his face. Stan can't help but feel like something bad is about to happen.

"I'll join...if only Craig and Stan switch clothes to go to Bebe's party." Tweek smiled innocently at his stunned boyfriend. "And if you guys help me with the baking."

"Betrayed…" Craig muttered. "By my own love...how could you."

"Chin up, Mr. Dramatic. It's just Stan's clothes." The coffee lover giggled.

"It's going to stain my skin." Craig said miserably. "And I'll have to burn off the clothes he contaminated."

"What are you? Ten?" Stab rolled his eyes. "What makes you think I'm happy about this shit? I didn't even agree! I could care less about you and your stupid coonstagram account."

"But Kyle cares." Tweek innocently pointed out, pointing at the redhead who currently has his arms crossed and is staring indifferently at Stan.

"Babe, please...not you, too…" Stan said in a pleading tone.

"I actually don't care about the coonstagram account." Kyle pointed out. "But I really wanna see you and Craig switch outfits."

Tweek and Kyle looked at each other with the same grin, as if they were talking telepathically.

"Babe, I don't scare easily, but you're seriously freaking me out right now." Craig said after a moment of silence.

"I actually just want to see you in clothes that aren't your dark colored NASA t-shirts." Tweek explained. "Who knows? You might actually look good in one of Stan's cheerful outfits."

"Stan does have style." Kyle added.

Clyde snickered. "Yeah has both style and Style." He elbowed the golden blonde sitting next to him as they laughed together.

Tweek shook his head. "He meant your ship name." He said, answering the confused faces.

Kyle had to stop himself from rolling his eyes. "Anyway, but let's make sure of something." He eyed both Craig and Stan. "You two cannot make the other look like absolute shit."

"Whaaaaat?!" Stan groaned. "You completely ruined my plan!"

Tweek sighed, acknowledging Craig's subtle pleading look. "Please don't sabotage each other's looks. What's the point in making each other look as hideous as possible if you guys have fought over who dresses better? Doesn't that defeat the entire purpose and you guys fought over nothing? Craig, I know you don't like having your time wasted right?"

Craig narrowed his eyes but sighed, glaring at Stan. "Fine." He mumbled. "You're lucky I love you." But Tweek's bright grin made it all worth it.

Kyle looked at Stan expectedly, with a hint of threat in his eyes. Stan gulped, not wanting to know what would happen if he refused. "Fine fine." He said reluctantly, returning the glare to the noriette sitting across from him.

"Wow. And they say they aren't whipped, Kenny." Clyde said.

"No, we just don't exist." Kenny added, finishing his cup of coffee. "If only I have someone who can make the rest of the world disappear by just looking at them."

"Are you talking about when they stare at their respective boyfriends or are you talking about how much they hate each other that the rest of the world disappears when they have a glare-down?" Clyde asked.

Kenny exhaled through his nose, crossing his arms behind his head. "I'm talking about finding someone I actually love."

"You? Wanting to settle down?" Clyde snorted. "That's new. Though I bet it's hard finding a type for ya, buddy. You're not known for being satisfied with just one type of personality."

"At least I do get laid, Clyde." Kenny raised a brow, smirking at how Clyde's body tensed up.

"How would you know if I got laid or not, Kenny?! You're not me!" The brunet clenched his fists, trying not to react too dramatically.

Kenny leaned back on his seat. "Clyde, you're a sweetheart. Not a player." The golden blonde explained. "Sure, you go on dates with all these beautiful ladies, but you're just searching for 'The One'. Granted, I don't know if you slept with any of these women. I know you lost your virginity since high school with you boasting about it right on the next day."

Clyde flushed slightly, ignoring Tweek's giggle and Kyle's judgemental look. "Shut up, Kenny! This is supposed to be about you!"

Kenny shrugged. "I get tired of switching around, too, man. It gets lonely since some are only with me for my looks, the chance to show off, or even money, which I never thought I'd ever say."

Clyde pat Kenny's shoulder. "I can't believe you say that when your sexual preferences aren't at all picky about who you're with."

"You know that cliche saying." Kenny laughed. "I'm in it for the personality. Though, I'll be honest and say I don't think I can accept it if I find the one with the perfect personality and he or she looks like a bulldozer ran over the dude or dudette's face."

"Who in the hell says 'dudette'?" Kyle said, waving a hand in front of Stan's face. "Hello? If you're done staring at Craig like he's the only one you need in your world, I have class in half an hour. We better get back to the campus if you don't wanna be left alone."

Tweek gasped. "Oh, me too! We have business class!" He jumped a little on Craig's lap, causing the taller one to grunt.

"You seriously have to watch where you're having your over-the-top reactions, honey." Craig mumbled. "You lucky you didn't break anything."

Tweek covered his mouth. "Oh my gawd, I'm so sorry Craig!"

Kenny leaned over with a smirk. "Just make it up to him by kissing it better, Tweekie."

Craig sighed as he pets Tweek's hair, knowing his boyfriend is probably blushing again. He's already mentally tired of the people around him and it's only 1:00 PM. "Shut the fuck up, McCormick. Let's just go. Remember we have to get to Token's for a meeting or some sort." He turned back to Tweek. "I'll pick you up after your classes. Text me, k?"

"Yes, boo." The smaller blonde giggled.

Everyone stood up and stepped out of the cafe, groaning from the blaring sunshine outside. "What did Token say about the meeting?" Clyde asked, shielding his eyes. "Fuck, I really should have brought sunglasses."

"Something about model recruiting and the current sponsors and our next gigs." Kenny answered. "At least it's not painfully hot right now."

"Token's like our actual manager." Clyde chuckled. "Good ol' mama Token."

"Looks like I'm the one with nothing to do today. I have night classes." Stan stretched. "I might as well continue my job hunt today."

Tweek gasped again. "Oh yeah! Stan!" He turned to talk to the other noirette, much to Craig's distaste. "I saw a pet shop nearby the tennis court that needed help! Maybe you can go see if they'll hire you."

"Perfect for you resume, too." Kyle added with a smile.

"Thanks Tweek! I'll go there right after!"

Tweek shook his head. "No problem! You did ask us to keep an eye out for you."

"Ok ok. Enough gratitude." Craig pulled Tweek back to his side.

Kyle shook his head. "He's so possessive. How does Tweek even stand that?"

Stan rolled his eyes, knowing the redhead can be even scarier than Craig when he gets possessive. "Some people like the feeling of being wanted and treasured, Ky. And seeing how Craig is an ice cold bastard, he obviously doesn't get much skinship. He's probably vomiting all the affection he had stored up to the only person that he believes deserves it."

"Am I dreaming or are you defending Craig?" Kyle chuckled, shoving his boyfriend playfully. "Who are you and what have you done with Stan?"

Stan laughed, wrapping an arm around Kyle. "I may hate Craig." He started. "But for the sake of my safety and looks, I might as well be nice to him for now so he won't ruin me on the day of the party."

Hello! Welcome to my first ever South Park fic! I am a new member of the fan club so please don't judge me too harshly~ However, I must say I am very obsessed with Creek, so if I end up paying more attention to them instead of the other ships, please forgive me! And please leave a review to tell me how I did~ Thanks!