Spoilers for Shadow of the tomb raider ahead do not continue.

Peter and I go back a number of years. It was my maiden voyage. I can't remember exactly what I was doing when we first met at ESU. I think it was a party or something else. Months later I remember Sam saying I needed a camera guy. Or at the very least someone other than her with a camera. Someone who could keep up with me and all my "Insane climbing" as Sam put it. Through whatever means it ended up being Peter. He definitely had the credentials with his taking Spider-Man's photos all the time. We knew Peter would be fine under pressure since he dealt with super villains on a daily basis. And to my surprise he scored higher than me on the teams fitness exams. In fact he scored the highest of anybody. Though we could all tell he put in a lot of work if his breathlessness was any indication. Now I know to say "pffft yeah right" to the notion of him getting tired.

So he came with us on our Yamatai adventure. I remember him getting along with Sam, Roth, Jonah, and everyone really. I especially remember him and I just... I don't know we just clicked together. I suppose we could both understand the pressures of living up to a great man's legacy. My father and his were both famous the world over. Though mine for archeology and his for biochemistry. I remember trading stories with Peter well into the night.

He was so easy to talk to. Like he could understand your problems. Like there wasn't any pain he couldn't relate to. I was raised by my step mom and he by his Aunt and Uncle. We both knew what it was like to be orphans. I think that's what helped us grow so close.

That and all the close calls. I remember when the ship crashed right before Yamatai Peter was in my room. When the problems with the storm first occurred Peter warned me. That's when I had him start rolling the camera. I remember telling him not to interfere if I got myself into trouble. I don't know what came over me.

I remember during that whole catastrophe on that cursed island Peter never once helped me. I'm so grateful for that. Especially now knowing that he had powers the entire time. I became a much stronger woman because of my ordeals. And every time Peter was always there behind me. His presence always helped me focus on getting us both out of our predicaments alive. Although I was the one who dragged him with me to fight the storm guardians and the deathless so it's more like my predicaments.

He was just my camera guy. Always able to hide himself when he needed to or help fight if the situation was truly desperate. As I began going to dig sites all over the world I realize now there was one constant presence I demanded on every voyage. Peter!

In all that time he and I became flirtatious. I remember for me it started after he and I went to sleep one night. We had only one sleeping bag between us and he almost insisted on sleeping outside the bag on the cold ground. I wasn't about to let his male chivalry get either of us killed. I remember pulling him in the bag at gun point and holding it to his chest until we both fell asleep. That night I had my first dream about him. Pardon the fantasy but it was about me holding a gun to his head while we had sex. Obviously you could see what inspired that one.

The next morning I woke up to find Peter had killed an anaconda with his bare hands. I remember remarking that Peter was stronger than I thought. I should have recognized then that he had powers. Or even that something was off about him. But rather it was me wanting to look the other way or genuinely my not having considered Peter to be an enhanced person didn't matter. I eventually found out before Antarctica.

Peter's job as my camera man was pretty dangerous. I should have known no ordinary man could handle it. I'm sure you've all seen or played those Tomb Raider games about my life. They are inspired by real events I've been through. And those interesting camera angles that follow me around in those games? I'm sure you've guessed by now but those are based on video shots from Peter following me through my adventures. My fights with wild animals are wildly exaggerated but the basic events still transpired.

Now the day I discovered that Peter was Spider-Man was in Paititi. Now I know the games would have you believe that Unuratu was dead but she's not. She can't walk but she's still alive. It was the one time Peter ever intervened but it was enough for me to see the he was Spider-Man. Talk about wake up call. That and the people of Paititi weren't exactly the right people to showcase his powers on front of. I mean if you're thinking that they thought of him as some god you're not far off from the reality.

Now to talk about Antarctica. That was another trip where we found yet another lost civilization. It nearly killed Sam, Peter, and I to find it but we succeeded. Sam kept trying to pressure Peter and I to get together. I'll admit it was both cute and kinda sexy seeing Peter all flustered with Sam constantly flirting with him on my behalf. Don't get me wrong I tried stopping her but she just ignored me. Eventually while searching for the entrance to the city Peter and I got separated from Sam. That's where a second sleeping bag incident occurred. I've mentioned it before so I'll not go over it again but before now the only time Peter and I were ever intimate was years ago.

Sam had encouraged me to join a threesome with herself and Peter. I didn't know this at the time but apparently Peter had agreed to nothing so the entire ordeal he'd been caught off guard by it all.

Still shortly after that we all discovered something. The people of this ancient city knew who Peter was. They called him the successor to the Great Weaver Anansi the Father of Fate. Now as an archeologist I recognized the name Anansi but I never heard of him being called Great Weaver. Still the people declared that what I was looking for was in a temple that only someone with divine blood in their veins could enter. Stubbornly I tried to enter actres anyway but a force kept me from actually walking in. It was like some insane wind was keeping me away. Peter didn't have a problem entering. The natives explained that it was no surprise given Peter's destiny.

Still it didn't sit well with me that I couldn't look inside such a wonderfully persevered temple. That night... Well I'll just come right out and say it. That night I seduced Peter. Shocking I know, me Lara Croft actually pursuing a guy. I remember informing him that I was on the pill and that it was safe for him to... Well do I really need to say it. In all our years together Peter had become a form of... stress release of you will.

The next day I felt different. I felt refreshed in a way that great mind boggling sex doesn't give you. And that's when I decided to try again and this time I entered the temple. So naturally Peter and I entered the temple and he recorded me retrieving the artifact. When we came out one of the priestessess examined me and she mumbled the one word that would change my life forever. Kulkulkan!

So let me explain a few things. I like weird pairings. Peter and Lara Croft is one of them. They have so much in common that you could see it but at the same time they have so many competing views. The similarities: they both can stay calm under pressure when needed. Both get lost in their work. Both rarely see things from other peoples perspectives and if and when they do they ignore those perspectives. Both I assume are worthy of some legendary things. (Lara has lifted Mjolnir and defeated gods before so don't tell me she couldn't hang against Spidey's enemies. and As for Trinity. Well that's basically Hydra to me.) Both are stubborn as all hell.

So what are their key and massive differences? Lara is perpetually rich. I don't need to say much about Peter do I? Both are stubborn as all hell. (Please think about the way in which they are stubborn) Peter can't ignore a crime. Lara can't either but only in regards to the adventure she's currently on. So if she saw an attempted rape she'd probably kill them. And that brings us to that great difference. Lara has killed in the hundreds to thousands and this could include gods. Spidey I think you can count on one hand if that. Lara seems like she'll never want kids or settle down. Reaching that point is all Peter wants.

Still you can't tell me you couldn't picture the pairing.

(Spoilers for Shadow of the Tomb Raider Ahead Do not Continue)

Moving on Peter as Anansi's champion has a divine essence in his blood. Low level sure but it is there. So basically his seed sparked the Divinity left over from when Lara was Kulkulkan. Essentially returning her to it but since the Apocalypse was already stopped she gets to stay one with Kulkulkan. In layman's terms Peter fucked the godhood into her.

What I like Myths.