I have no words to thank you all for the positive feedback I got! I'll reply to each of you individually along this week, but seriously, I'm moved. It warms my heart to know you've enjoyed this piece, so here I deliver you all Shiro's pov that I had more time to work on.

I've gone back to the first chapter and fixed a few things (and the title, because it was 3am and I was almost falling asleep fkhsdlfkhs). Also, the wolf - it's Kosmo apparently. I saw both versions on the subtitles, but everyone's sticking the version with K so I fixed that too. Keith, Krolia, Kosmo. Huh.

There's another thing I want to add to this, but I don't know when I'll get around to it. Enjoy!

in your eyes, there's a heavy blue

Adrenaline kept his heart beating fast throughout the battle, from the moment the Paladins left the base to call upon their Lions to the moment he stared at Sendak's face from where he lied helplessly on the floor, defeated. Keith had been there and saved his life again, saved him from his recurring nightmare, got him sitting upright again.

Thanking Keith had been the only break he was given to catch his breath before they were fighting for their lives again, this time against a foreign, overpowered creation that easily drove Voltron into the ground. It all had been a blur of fear and desperation to save the Paladins and Earth, and his will to fight had transformed their new ship into a machine worthy of its name, slow but massive and powerful, helping Voltron defeat their new enemy.

Inside their powered down robot, Shiro hears his crew picking themselves up after the last strike, but keeps his eyes on the form of the Lions, lifting that machine off the ground and flying skyward to space. One doesn't need to be a genius to know what is going on, and he swears he can feel his heart in his throat, blocking passage and making his lungs scream for air.

It's all quiet for a few minutes. He sends a prayer to whoever is listening, begging to keep them safe, keep them alive, please. But it is rejected, his reply coming in the form of five colorful streaks falling from the sky.

His heart screeches to a halt.

As a leader, Shiro knows he can't really favor one over the rest of the team, that he can't pick sides and has to treat everyone equally - yet, he goes to the Black Lion first, the pull too strong to ignore. He worries for all of them, wonders how they are all doing, they are all important to him, but Keith... Keith has been around for so long he can't imagine his life without him, so he has to make sure Keith's fine himself.

He's shaking so much it's a wonder his legs haven't given out and left him sprawled on the wide expanse of the desert, but the Lion isn't too far. There are teams around the Black Lion preparing to head inside her open mouth, and other groups were dispatched to aid the other Lions. Garrison personnel communicate in hurried orders, poking around Black's massive jaw, and the medical team doesn't let him join them, holding him back until he's forced down on a foldable stool to make sure he's all right and unhurt.

Exasperation wells up as he struggles against them to no avail, grits his teeth and tries to push them away, watching the rescue team's every move like a hawk, so intent, afraid that he can miss anything crucial in the blink of an eye. Seconds bleed into minutes and he breaks away from their restraining hands as some of the paramedics make their way to the Lion, quieter in comparison to the others, careful as they retrieve Keith from within the cockpit and set him on a stretcher.

Hands on his chest stop him from getting closer, but even from a distance Shiro can see how injured he is, dark hair clinging to his face, blood steadily oozing from a cut that can't be seen amidst so much red, bruises and cuts where the Paladin outfit is torn. The sight sends his heart into overdrive and he keeps pushing, keeps wanting to come closer and touch him and check for a pulse himself, but two paramedics hold him back as the others accomodate an unconscious Keith on the back of a Garrison ambulance.

"I'm sorry, sir, but you can't go with him." One of them says, and Shiro has to watch helplessly as it drives away.

He doesn't look like he was ever Garrison's golden boy the way he is now, unkempt, stains on his uniform and hair oily as he paces up and down the length of the waiting room in the infirmary wing. The others are here, too, Coran, Romelle, the Holts, Hunk's parents, Veronica and the rest of her extensive family, Iverson - even Kosmo, with head placed on Romelle's thigh and looking up at her with the saddest gaze he's ever seen as she pets him consolingly. They're all worried, running on very few hours of sleep, tapping feet and biting nails in clear signs of anxiety.

The clock on the wall ticks away and time never seems to pass, crawling at a snail's pace, making him go mad slowly. Shiro refuses to sit, so Sam joins him and holds him in place with a hand on his shoulder. This simple contact, this silent support, has his throat closing up and eyes prickling, so Shiro holds his pieces together and averts his gaze.

Hunk's parents are the first to go in when they have him stabilized and presentable enough. Shiro is happy for them, happy for Hunk that wanted to reunite with them more than anything else. His mother is sniffing gently as they follow the nurse out of the waiting room. Coran and Romelle go next, the orange material of her uniform moving unnaturally with every step, a giveaway that she's sneaking the mice into the room. Shiro, of course, doesn't say anything - Kosmo is here after all.

The Holts and Lance's family are called almost simultaneously. His little brothers are teary eyed, holding onto Veronica's hand tightly, so very quiet. Colleen takes Shiro's hand in hers and gives it a squeeze, murmurs a few words of encouragement before they take their leave, too, hand in hand. They're an inspiration, still together and strong after so many years.

Iverson gets him to sit down and Kosmo immediately comes to his side with a whine, perches his head on Shiro's knee and closes his eyes when the spot behind his ear is scratched. He lowers his face to his new prosthetic and closes his eyes to wait.

"Shiro." Iverson is touching his shoulder, shaking him lightly, and Shiro lifts his head to blink bleary at the man. Had he fallen asleep? "We can go see him now."

He's on his feet before Iverson is done talking. Kosmo walks by his side and between him and the wolf, Shiro doesn't know who's more anxious to see Keith. The nurse stops outside the room, smiles at them sadly and excuses herself. He doesn't dwell on the sorry quality of her smile and turns to Iverson, but the man simply shakes his head and tells him to go inside by himself without outright saying it. Kosmo sniffs at the crack between the door and the floor and Shiro steels himself before pushing the door open.

His composure falls apart when he lifts his gaze from the floor. Keith is so pale he can see his veins on the uncovered spot of his inner elbow, and the harsh lightning of the room does little to make him seem like he's not fighting a war against death. His hair is matted with dried blood still, a bruise on his left cheek, arms and legs are carefully wrapped, hiding cuts and other injuries from view, hands bandaged up to the knuckle. Shiro takes it all in and it's too much, even the chapped lips seem too painful.

Kosmo bumps his snout on Keith's hand, whines when he doesn't answer to the touch.

Shiro collapses on a plastic chair beside the bed and tries to find comfort on the steady beeping of the machine.

Days later and the Paladins are still unconscious. The doctors are optimistic that they will make a full recovery, and Shiro wants to believe them wholeheartedly, but it's so hard when he has to see all of them lying in bed so broken.

He visits the others daily, but stays by Keith's bedside the most, not wanting to impose on the others' families, but staying away from Keith at this moment in life seems almost impossible. Kosmo remains in the room all day long and refuses to budge, so Shiro has started bringing him bowls of food and water so he doesn't have to leave Keith's side.

Shiro's brought more than that, actually. At night, he tosses and turns in bed in his room, too worried, too afraid of what can happen if he's not here, so he's moved into the hospital room almost completely. His own toothbrush is in the cabinet of the adjacent room, a few change of clothes occupy the dresser; his pajamas, blankets and pillow stay on the bench by the window when he's not using them.

Keith remains unresponsive. Kosmo tries in his own way, sniffing and licking, but goes ignored. Shiro talks to Keith to keep himself sane, in hopes he will reply at some point, but he's met with silence. There isn't much he can do but wait, and he hasn't been feeling very patient lately to do that.

A knock on the door rises his from his musing and he pulls his hand away from Keith's as it opens and Sam comes into the room. "How is he?"

"The same as ever," he tries not to sound too disheartened and knows he's failed when Sam frowns his lips.

"They will come around, Shiro." He says in that sure tone of voice only he can pull off. "All of them."

Shiro hopes so, scrubs his face with a hand to keep the tears at bay, ignores the stubble growing along his jawline. "Did you manage to contact her?"

"Yes, I did. She spoke with me a few days ago." Sam stops at the foot of the bed, reaches out to pet Kosmo. Everyone's been doing that lately to give him some comfort. "She's on her way, said she'll come as fast as she can."

He nods, rubbing a hand over his mouth. What is he even going to say to Krolia when she arrives? How can he even face her when Keith is lying in bed like this and Shiro was powerless to keep him from harm? Keith is always protecting and saving him, and sometimes Shiro feels like he doesn't do enough for him.

"Why don't you sleep?" Sam nods to the seat by the window, large enough that one can lie down on it, but too far away from the bed that Shiro doesn't consider it a viable option. "I'll keep an eye on him."

Shiro only complies because it means he can escape this guilt for a while.

The briefing had dragged on and on, and now he hurries down the hallway of the infirmary wing, eager to return to Keith's bedside after hours apart, after learning that he'll have to give it up to help with the planet's own recovery after the Galra invasion. Shiro's already thinking of someone he can trust to stay with Keith while he's away, someone who will keep him updated throughout the day, running over a mental list of capable people. He'll pay a nurse if he has to, nevermind that he hasn't had a source of income for the past years.

Into the room he goes, stopping in his tracks when he sees two figures by the bedside. Krolia and Kolivan are here much earlier than he'd expected and Shiro realizes belatedly that he still has no words to say to her, doesn't even wonder how they got here so fast. Kolivan acknowledges him first with a nod, face grim and serious yet more relaxed than Shiro remembers it ever being. Krolia caresses Keith's hair so slow and gentle it hurts to see - Shiro's done the same thing, afraid he'd break under the touch - and finally looks at him, all her hurt visible in her eyes. God, Keith looks so much like her.

Shiro squares his shoulder, presses his lips together - and crumbles in the next second. "I'm so sorry." His voice cracks with a sob. "I'm sorry I couldn't do anything. He - he saved me so many times and I couldn't do the same - I - I'm very sorry, Krolia."

He finds himself in her arms. Krolia isn't as tall as other Galrans they have met, but she's fierce and strong, and wraps her arms around him in a firm hug that has him bending to shove his face into her shoulder and hide the evidences of his crying. "You know how selfless he can be. Don't blame yourself for it, Shiro."

She holds him until his shoulders aren't shaking anymore, until he picks his pieces up and tries to mend them back together. Kolivan has his gaze set on Keith, which Shiro suspects has been there since Shiro opened his mouth, and he's grateful that he didn't bear witness of his tears. She pats his shoulders gently and smiles, forgiving and loving. Keith doesn't deserve any less than this.

"Thank you for keeping him company," Krolia eyes the bundle of fabric on the corner of the bench. "You can return to your room, but only if you'd like."

He seizes her offer instantly. "I'd rather stay."

She smiles knowingly. "Then the night shift is yours."

Lance is the first to wake up and Shiro visits him in the evening when he's free of his duties. He doesn't have any deep gashes like Hunk and Keith, but he's got more cracked ribs and a sprained wrist to make up for that. Something that's completely untouched is his face and he makes a show of being overly relieved about it, because his face is so handsome, his features so unique, and Shiro laughs along because one of the Paladins is finally free from the clutches of a coma.

"How's Allura?" He's leaning forward on his bed, fingers curled loosely around the sheets, so openly concerned for her well being Shiro has to wonder he looks the same when he asks the doctors about Keith.

"She's fine, making a speedy recovery." Shiro sits down on the edge of the bed, flips through the charts like he can understand what's written in them. "Hunk and Pidge are, too. The doctors think one of them will wake up by the end of the week."

Lance nods and sags against his pillows with a sigh. "I'm so glad - wait a second." He shoots up, yelps when his ribs protest and has to take some time to breathe until the pain fades. "What about Keith?"

Shiro's insides go cold.

"I was in that ambulance, Shiro. There was so much blood." He chokes. "How's he? Is he - is he okay?"

"He's injured more than most, but he's alive." Keith's alive, and these words are what keep Shiro moving through the day.

Lance smiles like he knows and understands how worried Shiro is, how it's eating him alive - and maybe he truly does. Shiro had been there, technically anyways, to see from up close how worried he'd been for Allura on numerous times, and heard that he shoved her out of the way, placed himself in the direct path of the radiation belt to save her life.

"Keith is a fighter, Shiro." He says and it's hard to believe these two were at odds in the beginning of their journey. "He won't give up."

Around forty hours later, he's notified that Hunk is awake, too. When he arrives that night, Hunk is almost completely hidden behind his parents' bodies as they hug him tightly, only his arms covered in bruises visible where they''re wrapped around their torsos. They were saying goodbyes and greet him before leaving, his mother wiping her face with her fingertips and her husband pulling her closer into his side to kiss the crown of her head. Shiro gives Hunk a moment to collect himself and clean his face, and claims his usual place on the edge of the mattress.

"How long have I been sleeping again?"

Shiro smiles at him. "About fifteen days."

"Ugh. Would you believe me if I said I could sleep for another two weeks?"

"I would, but we like you better awake." He pats his shoulder, mindful of his injuries. "Lance's awake too and he might get some clearance to leave his bed soon, so he can come visit you. You can keep each other company."

"I'd like that." Hunk traces the bruise on his arms and looks up with a frown on his face. "What about the others?"

Shiro fixes a smile on his lips even as his stomach plummets to the ground. "On their way to recovery."

"Great, that's great. That might have been our toughest fight up to date." Hunk wrings his hands on his lap. "And I thought Sincline was bad."

Shiro nods in silent agreement, thinking of everything the Garrison's been doing to track down every piece of that mysterious machine and try to figure out where it came from exactly and just what it can do. There are pieces scattered everywhere, some that landed on Earth and others that are floating in space. Some alien races that have come to their aid are helping with that, Ryner and Sam leading the search.

Hunk nibbles on his bottom lip for a moment. "Hey, Shiro, when Keith wakes up, can you tell him I wanna talk to him?" He grins, so bright he looks five years younger. "I really want him to meet my parents."

There it is again, that pain and helplessness taking place inside his chest, squeezing until he can swear his heart is going to shatter. "Sure, Hunk. I'll tell him."

On the following day, Shiro leaves his vigilant spot by Keith's bedside at the break of dawn to check on Pidge, who has just woken up, and leave for work afterwards.

She's watching with disinterest from where she lies as a nurse fusses over her vitals. Pidge's small, too small, and she could've easily been the one that got hurt the most, but thankfully it's not the case. Her injuries are light and non life threatening, the more serious one being a scrape on her shoulder that she hit hard enough to draw blood. Zethrid hadn't been wrong to think they were all fiercely protective of Pidge - her young age and size definitely spark that instinct in them.

Her face lights up with a smile, eyes still heavy with sleep. "Finally a familiar face. Hey."

Shiro ruffles her hair gently. "Hey, Pidge. Your family's been notified already, they're on their way. Matt's here too. How are you feeling?"

"Oh, you know when kids shake a plastic bag and there's a fish in it?" She makes a vague gesture with a hand. "I'm the fish. But you, Shiro, you look like that, too." She winces as the nurse pricks her skin with a needle to draw blood. "Are you okay?"

He has been ignoring mirrors lately, not in the mood to see if he looks as tired as he feels. "Yeah, I... I've been staying with Keith during the night."

Unseeingly, she holds a cotton ball to her inner wrist, her eyes now clearer and sharp, watching him. "How is he? And everyone else?"

"He's in pretty bad shape, but stable. Lance and Hunk are already awake and the doctors believe Allura will wake up soon."

"And Keith?"

Shiro shrugs his shoulders and it feels like he's admitting defeat. "There's no prediction."

With three Paladins now awake, Shiro feels more hopeful than he had since witnessing their fall, but only minutely. Krolia and Coran never lose hope, yet their fears are almost palpable, and the others are getting increasingly worried as well. At this point, he can't recall the last time he had ever been at peace, able to get a good night of sleep, able to look at and think of Keith without having his heart seized by immeasurable pain.

Three days later, Coran is rewarded for his patience with the sight of Allura's blue eyes open wide and bright with unshed tears. She's the one to get more emotional upon awakening, clinging to her old friend and father figure tighty, dragging Romelle and then Shiro into the embrace. Her mice squeak as they cuddle close to her on her lap.

"I'm alive?" There's so much shock coloring her voice, hands trembling as she wipes her eyes.

That is something Shiro had never considered: what had gone through their minds as they soared up high with a ticking time bomb, and he's not sure if he wants to know. They could have died, evaporated as his original body had, or left torn and lifeless inside their Lions to be found by the Garrison teams. Of course he would rather have Keith with his eyes open right now, but having him sleeping and breathing is much better than not having him at all.

Her grip on his arm is strong and uncomfortable, but he meets her eyes head on without flinching. "Shiro? What about the others? How are they?"

"They're alive and well, Princess. Don't worry." He squeezes her hand in reassurance, but she's not even close to winding down.

"What about injuries?" Urgency shows in her voice and eyes. "Is everyone awake?"

Shiro falls silent. From his peripheral vision, he can see Coran and Romelle on the other side of the bed, the former turning his face towards the window and the latter lowering her head. Allura sucks in a breath and her worry melts into sadness, piercing him like an arrow to his heart.

"I'm sorry, Shiro." Her whispered words reflect his own hurt. "I'm so sorry."

Shiro speaks with Krolia and Kolivan on a daily basis, their concern for Keith's well being binding them closer emotionally. The three of them look absolutely wrecked and there's a pain on his neck and shoulders that might just lodge itself there forever, yet he doesn't leave, doesn't even dare to consider that option, sitting faithfully by Keith's bedside.

He touches him a lot, usually only with his human hand so he can feel his warmth. It brings him some comfort to know this is real and not just his mind playing tricks on him. The bandages around Keith's hands are rough and his hair needs some serious scrubbing and trimming, but Shiro treads his fingers through it like its made of the finest silk. His cheeks are pale but warm, and when it all gets too much to bear, Shiro lays his head gently on his chest to listen to his heartbeat, because it can't compare to the mechanical beep of the machines.

Today he has pulled an all-nighter, nursing a glass of water and trying to work on some papers, but all he can do is look at Keith and hope. It takes another near death experience for him to realize his feelings once again, and now he regrets never acting on them when they were both conscious. Shiro tries not to think of what ifs, but sleep deprived as he is and filled to the brim with longing and wanting, it gets progressively harder to evade the daydreams.

When Keith wakes up, Shiro will tell him everything, he promises himself that.

Kosmo lifts his head from where he's sleeping alongside Keith, tilts his head further into Shiro's palm when he reaches over to stroke his muzzle, a small noise coming from him.

"Me too, Kosmo," is all he says, smiling sadly at the wolf. "I miss him too."

He heads into the bathroom to prepare for his day, showers and brushes his teeth, slips into a fresh uniform that is infinitely cleaner than his last one, rumpled and dirty and sweat stained. Shiro taps the shadows under his eyes and decides he doesn't care about his appearance on television. These are a testament of how much he cares for the man lying on that bed.

Keith looks exactly the same when he emerges from the bathroom. The doctors say he's looking better, that the tests they run encounter no issues and that his bones are mending well, but Shiro can only see that he's getting slimmer as the days pass. He sits on the edge of the bed, traces healing cuts on Keith's fingers with his thumb, studies his face carefully because his lashes might flutter, who knows? Shiro only grows more disappointed when they remain perfectly still. Keith's eyes don't even move behind his closed eyelids.

"Please, Keith." Shiro asks, begs once more, and he'll do it again and again without shame until this rouses Keith from his sleep. "I need you here with me."

The fingers under his hand remain immobile and Shiro moves up to cup Keith's cheek instead, touching their foreheads together. "Come back to me. Don't go where I can't follow."

Keith had saved him from disappearing completely with just his words once, and Shiro wishes his own could be as powerful and effective, but there's not a single hitch in Keith's breathing and Shiro has to bite back the urge to cry again. He's done it too many times these past days to count, letting the tears mingle with the water from his shower or wiping them away in the dead of the night before Kosmo can notice.

He wonders if he's doing something wrong, if his pleas aren't working because he doesn't love Keith enough. Impossible, he thinks, because he can't remember how not loving Keith feels like.

The door opens some time later when the sun is way higher in the sky and three pairs of feet enter the room. Two of them are Krolia and Kolivan, he knows without looking, but he doesn't acknowledge them and keeps his head bowed and close to Keith's.

"Shiro."

If Iverson is here, then it means it's time for him to go. He'd been granted some hours to himself this morning to rest before the speech. He rehearsed it five times throughout the night, stopping his pacing to look at Keith's still form and ask him what he thought, imagining possible answers and adjusting the speech accordingly.

Kosmo's tail thumps on the mattress when Krolia walks up to give his ear a scratch. Shiro doesn't move, just breathes in the same air as Keith, feels the steady pulse against the thumb resting at the base of his throat. He hopes it never wavers, hopes Keith will never go cold.

"Shiro," Iverson tries again, but it seems he can't bring himself to sound stern when Shiro's hurting this much. "It's time."

He lingers there for some seconds more and slowly peels himself away. Kolivan gives him an encouraging nod and Krolia tugs at the collar of his uniform, brushes imaginary lint from his shoulders and says a few words of support.

Keith is still unconscious when he looks back one last time.

The news only reach him once he's done with having meaningless small talk with important people after his speech. At least two nurses have reprimanded him, but Shiro runs down the hallways of the infirmary wing regardless, skidding on the floor twice before he reaches the open door of Keith's room.

He's asleep again but the confirmation from Krolia that he had been awake earlier makes a wave of relief wash over him, so strong his knees finally give out under his weight and Kolivan catches him just in the wink of time. They have him sit down on the chair that belongs to him at this point and he weakly palms away at the tears slipping down his cheeks, not minding them in the least because Keith is okay. Keith opened his eyes and stayed with them however briefly before the medicines claimed him again.

Even Kosmo seems happier.

From here onwards, it's a challenge for Shiro to find him awake. In the first days, Keith can barely keep his eyes open and Krolia relays to him what he's said in his few minutes of consciousness. At night, Shiro can't bring himself to wake him up to talk. Keith needs rest, needs to recover, and he doesn't want to be the reason why his progress is delayed even if all he wants to do is hear his voice again.

So he waits. He's preached enough about patience to know that's exactly what he needs right now, so he hears from the other Paladins that managed to catch him awake, talks to Krolia, Kolivan and the doctors, never falls into deep sleep in case Keith wakes up when it's dark outside.

That last tactic proves to be useful when fingers play with his hair at some ungodly hour in the night.

Seeing him awake after so long can't be compared to anything Shiro's ever felt before. He becomes aware of his hand holding Keith's at some point and pulls away. Shiro promised himself he'd confess, but now doesn't know if he should, it doesn't feel like the right time, and immediately he feels the air between them shift. The distance he tries to create feels like a chasm and he doesn't want it. He shouldn't do this, not after all he's wanted lately was for Keith to open his eyes and talk to him, not when all he wants to do is scoop Keith up in his arms and protect him like he couldn't before.

But Shiro realizes they might never have a right time for this. They're fighting a war, no one knows what will happen tomorrow or the day after, and if he postpones this for too long, he might lose his chance.

"Please, I don't want to test that theory and risk losing you for good."

"Shiro, I'll never leave you for as long as I live."

It's an echo of a promise from their past that tumbled from Shiro's lips, to never give up.

On his bed, Keith is a line of warmth along Shiro's side and he fits nicely tucked there. This proximity gives him more comfort than any other touch, than holding a limp hand or stroking a pale cheek. Keith's words creates roots in his mind, and Shiro's horrified to realize he'd began to forget the exact timbre of his voice.

"Whatever happens, we'll stay together," Keith says in a whisper. "I won't lose you again and you won't lose me either."

When Shiro wakes up and sees the deep blue of Keith's irises, he understands the meaning of getting lost in one's eyes.