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◆ AUTHOR'S NOTES:

Oh, wow! My goodness, I never thought I would receive this kind of feedback for the first chapter. Thank you all ever so much, it means the world to me! I am sorry I haven't updated sooner. I could give a list of excuses, but I won't bother. Things happen, things don't always go as planned, and life gets busy.

Anyway, I just want to say that I'm still finding my ground when it comes to writing Kakashi. He's my favorite character, but I personally find him very difficult to write and this story is a personal challenge for myself to try and find that sweet spot. So if he seems out of character at points, please forgive me. I'm working on it and it may take a while. On a side note, though, this is also a pre-Naruto Kakashi so he isn't going to be exactly how he is from the manga/anime.

Last note before the start, I realize that my writing seems kind of, I don't know, dark a serious-ish? Well, at some point things will be getting more light-hearted and cute. So do except a shift in tone as the chapters progress. Not that this is going to be a comedy type story, but like, family-based, y'know?

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ＤＯＵＢＬＥ ＤＩＧＧＩＮＧ

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"In every walk with nature, one receives far more than he seeks."
- John Muir

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The first rays of sun shed a colorless glow from beyond the forested hills in the east, turning the damp of night into swirls of iridescent fog that cast endless, flittering shadows along the lush grounds. Kakashi stood beneath the shade of a large hickory tree; his feet balanced atop the massive gnarled roots that sprouted up from the ground, twisting and slithering away from the robust trunk. As its namesake, Konohagakure was widely known for the ancient trees that surrounded their village. Green and ever-looming, the trees were their eternal guardians, providing a natural defense by shielding the village from plain view and creating a rugged terrain that was challenging to navigate. Every so often, Leaf-nin were sent out to scour the woods for diplomats and merchants from other lands who ended up lost while traveling through the dense forest.

Kakashi had been awake for nearly four hours now, having struggled to sleep despite his body aching for much-needed rest. Since his meeting with the Hokage and the council late last night, he had been intensely preoccupied with the specifics of his new assignment, his mind thinking too hard and stopping too little. Was he supposed to buy new furniture? Did the leaky shower pipe in the bathroom pose a danger for a toddler? Would his stipend adjust accordingly to afford all the new necessities to come? Did he have to buy diapers?

If the library had been open at two in the morning, Kakashi would have happily rummaged through the archives to find a book or scroll that could provide the tiniest bit of guidance. But unfortunately for him, the library operated on civilian hours, meaning that the doors shut promptly – and rather annoyingly – at ten o'clock sharp.

So Kakashi did what he always did when sleep evaded him: he fled his small apartment in the middle of the night and made his way to the only place in the village where he could close his eyes and think in peace.

The third training ground wasn't anything remarkable in terms of geographical layout, nor did it pertain any advantages for training simulations; that was why it was often overlooked by the jōnin sensei when it came to choosing areas for their genin teams to practice. It was on the smaller side compared to the other grounds scattered around the edges of Konoha, nestled between a narrow portion of the Naka River and the beginnings of the Kyojin Forest. The clearing was flat and open, with few hiding spots or features that could be incorporated into a worthwhile battle. On the other hand, the openness allowed for the use of more explosive and destructive jutsu without causing mass damage.

Looking around the grounds, which were scarcely illuminated by the beginnings of the morning sun, Kakashi shook his head softly. By the gods, he used to hate the place.

When Kakashi was placed on a team at the tender age of five with only a single year of Academy training beneath his belt, Training Ground Three was where his jōnin sensei had decided they would meet every day for practice. The first time he saw their new designated training spot, he hadn't liked the way the sunlight reflected off the water and constantly created a blinding glare; or that the local fauna residing in the woods were exceptionally noisy; or, of course, that it was the furthest training ground from his home, meaning he had to wake up extra early to arrive on time. Minato-sensei must have drawn the short stick when it had come to divvying out the ground selections that year.

While shifting his back against the rough trunk of the tree, Kakashi's eyes landed on three awkwardly placed stumps in the center of the clearing which, at first glance, appeared to hold no significant purpose whatsoever. The sight of them, however, always brought forth memories of cold bento boxes and silver bells. Kakashi sighed as he thought back to what exactly he had disliked the most about Training Ground Three all those years ago and how petty his younger self had been.

The thing he had hated most was how much Obito had loved it.

Obito Uchiha, who appeared to have everything going for him – wealth, incredible power potential, and conventionally good looks, all thanks to his blood lineage – had been utterly smitten with the training grounds. The first early morning Obito, Rin, and Kakashi met there, having just been formed into Team Seven, the Uchiha had nearly given Kakashi a migraine from his inability to shut up. Obito seemed to have a remark for everything around them, even the most minuscule aspects. The trees were 'so tall!' and they had the river to themselves because 'all the fisherman work way downstream!' and 'it's so quiet here, are we still even in the village?'

Kakashi hadn't understood the fuss. It was just a dull patch of land that hadn't been built upon yet. There were other parts of Konoha that had the same type of trees, and the river had several access points throughout the village – including the Academy, which often used the waterway during class. As for the quietness, well, Kakashi lived in what was essentially Konoha's backwoods, where not many chose to live for convenience sake, and was thus accustomed to being surrounded by silence. Rin had seemed indifferent to the matter, but smiled and nodded at everything Obito said, which only encouraged him. Kakashi had never understood how she had managed to put up with their teammate's obnoxious and immature behavior. 'Then again,' he reminded himself that, in hindsight, she had dealt with a young Kakashi's constant brooding and condescending attitude, as well.

He smiled. Rin had been one of a kind.

With the rustling breeze, a flock of crows departed from the tree he stood beneath.

Kakashi idly watched as they swarmed through the sky in a black cloud, their shrill cries echoing off the hillsides; wholly in sync, the flock arched up and down through the air before finally disappearing over the treetops. He may not have enjoyed the small patch of land years ago when he was young and full of a stubborn need to succeed, but now that he was older – and wiser, he'd like to believe – he appreciated the area and thought it to be one of the better places within the village.

A hand unwittingly traced the outer corner of his hitai-ate and pressed down on the silver metal plate that concealed the left half of his face. Maybe it was after Obito had given him his eye that Kakashi had finally been able to, quite literally, see the beauty and value of Training Ground Three through Obito's perspective.

In the distance, he heard the rumblings of metal carts being wheeled down the cobbled streets of the Market District as the early morning vendors began their set-up for the day, and realized that it wouldn't be long until his second appointment with the Hokage later that morning. With a deep breath, he hopped away from the tree roots and finally made his way toward the center of the clearing. He hadn't wanted to disturb his friends too early, but if he waited any longer then he wouldn't have any time to talk.

As he walked through the dewy grass, Kakashi's fingers nervously itched at his thighs from within his pants pockets. His pace was slow, feet lightly dragging behind.

His body had reached its limit two days ago, and now he'd gone nearly three days without proper sleep. He was running on fumes at this point, and just moving his body took a great deal of effort. Kakashi was frustrated with himself for not trying harder to sleep. Still, he knew that he needed time alone before the day and his apartment was the worst place for that.

'Talking to them should help,' he told himself. He could always rely on his friends to help him sort through whatever was on his mind.

At the edge of the green field was a large, triangular piece of slate that jutted into the sky like a beacon. It was the dedicated marker for all those who had fallen in the name of the Leaf. The first time Kakashi's father had taken him to visit the stone many years ago, he was told that it was one of the oldest landmarks in the village, older than the first face on Hokage Mountain, even.

While the nostalgia of better days that the training ground gave him were nice, it was this specific feature that kept drawing Kakashi back.

Seven years had passed since Obito's death, and four since Rin's, yet the Copy Ninja continued to visit the Memorial Stone every day. He would pay his respects and, if he had any, share his thoughts and feelings. Coming to the Stone was just as much part of his daily routine as waking and eating. He felt wrong and off-balanced if he neglected to visit.

But why did he feel so obligated to make a daily appearance, even so long after his friends' passing? He wasn't all too sure. Shame most likely, as well as believing there was still a debt to be paid. Or maybe his reasons were more masochistic in nature. Did he visit only to lacerate the emotional scars that had never healed properly until they throbbed and bled once more? Perhaps to scratch and tear at his inner subconscious until one day he went mad?

Yeah, that could have been it.

He untied the cloth band from around his head and carefully tucked it into a pouch on his belt. The pupil in his left eye dilated as it adjusted to the light; already, Kakashi felt a slight ache building in the back of his skull. It was during these visits to the Stone in which he would allow the demons he oh-so tirelessly fought back each day the chance to consume him. Because, gods above, if there was one thing Kakashi Hatake didn't get, it was why he was still alive while everyone he had ever cared about continued to die in front of his eyes.

He was cursed to survive, seemingly since birth, with his mother as the first victim. And as far as he could tell, that had yet to change.

'And now I'm supposed to care for a child, one who deserves more help than I could ever hope to offer,' Kakashi quietly thought to himself, dread washing over him. With the current mortality status of those he had been charged with protecting in the past, Kakashi couldn't help but think that Sasuke would be better off anywhere else.

His hand brushed over the slab of rock before him, wiping away the water droplets that had formed in the night, leaving the black obsidian glistening in the wake of his touch. The pads of his fingers slowly traced over each engraving that adorned the face of the cenotaph.

"It's been a while, hasn't it?" he said aloud, the corner of his eyes crinkling with a smile when he felt the names of his friends beneath his fingers. "I've been out of the village, so you'll have to forgive me for not visiting recently, but don't worry, I won't be leaving again for a long while."

The Hokage hadn't said anything about prohibiting Kakashi from leaving Konoha, but if he were the sole caretaker of a toddler, and with his ANBU duties stripped away, he couldn't think of a reason why he would need to now. Kakashi knelt in the grass, the blue fabric of his pants dampening at the knees and chilling his skin beneath; the open-toed sandals he wore allowed his toes to dig into the moist soil. When he was young, Kakashi had liked to play in the dirt with his father's ninken. He had loved the smell of freshly tilled earth and, strangely enough, enjoyed the feeling of dirt caked beneath his fingernails. Since moving into the downtown Market District, he usually only experienced those pleasures while out of the village.

He thought of his most recent mission in Kumogakure, where he had been spying on the Hidden Cloud ninja to gather more information pertaining to the Hyūga clan. During the entirety of his stay, Kakashi had taken shelter in the rocky cliffs upon which the village was built. The climate had been cold and dry, and barely any vegetation grew there. The few trees that did were brown and leafless; a small variety of shrubs and weeds that poked out of small crevices along the mountain. For two months, Kakashi had longed for the sight of the ageless green trees, and to smell the crisp scent of petrichor that wafted through Konoha.

A small beetle with a mossy green shell crept onto the Memorial Stone, inches away from Kakashi's hand; its wings flared up before settling back down, making its presence known. Kakashi was curious if the bug was one of the Aburame's, come to pay its respects to a fallen clan member. While he may have been the most regular of visitors, he was far from being the only. The beetle meandered across the stone surface, which Kakashi mindlessly watched for several long moments.

Sometimes, when his life felt over-burdened, Kakashi wondered if it were better to live a short life as a creature, even one so fragile and vulnerable, to be free and without any conscious, without obligations or rules to be bound by. There would be nothing to worry about except food and survival. Animals weren't troubled with the perplexities of society. Perhaps in his next life he would be reborn as such, maybe a bird or a turtle that bathed in the sun all day, and allowed a short break from everything. 'That could be nice,' he thought.

With the beetle crawling out of sight, Kakashi returned his attention to the Stone and said in a slight drawl, "I have a new mission. I don't know how it'll go, though. Haven't done anything of this sort before." Kakashi had to hold back a scoff, "They sure didn't teach us how to prepare for something like this back in the Academy."

The lessons taught back during his short enrollment at the Academy had been very intense with almost all time spent on battle techniques, leaving little room, if any, for exploration into other schools of thought. It was all about jutsu and weapon mastery, with the occasional light sprinkling of enemy country geography. Of course, it had to be that way at the time, with Fire being in the middle of a war and all. It hadn't even been two weeks before Rezā-sensei had passed out newly forged kunai to the class of first-years. At just a mere four years of age, adults were trusting Kakashi to responsibly wield a blade that could have easily sliced through a tendon or artery with one slip-up.

'Desperate times,' he reminded himself.

Nowadays, with all villages signed into peacetime, Academy students didn't touch a weapon until the end of their first year. Lessons were balanced, and the Academy incorporated a more in-depth scholastic curriculum, with broader subjects such as history and politics, writing and foreign dialects, and even arithmetic's. Students also had the option to take elective classes in more focused areas such as code encryption, animal care, weapon forging, and basic medical aid. It gave Kakashi hope that the generations of Leaf-nin to follow would be much more well-rounded and adapt for shinobi life.

No longer would children be pushed through classes and graduated so villages would have a supply of bodies to place on the frontlines.

Kakashi looked down, his fingers tugging up the strands of grass by his knees. The wet blades squeaked when rubbed together. Sasuke Uchiha was three years old, meaning that it wouldn't be long until he would enter the Academy; though if he had a shred of Uchiha talent, then it was very plausible that he could begin even sooner. He wondered what kind of classes Sasuke would want to take, what kind of future he would want for himself, and what choices he would make to reach his goals.

'Does he even want to become a ninja?' he pondered. Would what Sasuke experienced fuel the desire to learn the same skills as his brother, or would he want nothing to do with the lifestyle that brought forth the destruction of his family? What would the Hokage say if Sasuke wanted to live a simple life as a merchant or farmer?

Kakashi's palms opened, releasing the clumps of grass from within, allowing them to fall back to the ground. "You guys will be shocked to hear this, if not completely in total disbelief, but I think I might be a little out of my depth here."

If Obito had been there to hear him say that, the Uchiha would have been laughing until his gut ached.

Kakashi Hatake, the prodigy of his generation, was out of his league. And it frightened him, truthfully. He had felt more comfortable when his father had taught him how to properly slit the throat of an enemy so that they bled out quickly and with little mess; that was a skill Kakashi knew he'd have to learn one day. But to watch a child? That wasn't the responsibility of ninja.

"There's this kid," Kakashi continued speaking to the monument, his voice slightly ragged in tone. "He needs my help because I'm the only one in the village who can, I suppose. It seems a bit ridiculous, and I feel like there are other solutions to this problem, but..." But what? He was given an order and who was he to disagree with the Lord Hokage? It wasn't like he had ever taken issue with assignments in the past. What was he so unnerved by?

It was Itachi, he came to realize as his reflection stared back at him from the shining black stone. Itachi Uchiha, a mere child himself, had just done the unthinkable and Kakashi hadn't seen it coming. During Itachi's short stunt on team Ro, he had respected the boy; he was young, determined, and undeniably very talented. Kakashi saw himself in Itachi, and maybe that's what scared him the most.

If he had allowed the darkness to take Itachi, how was he supposed to stop it from corrupting Sasuke?

He paused, debating on whether he should share with his friends the happenings of the massacre. Of course, Obito deserved to know – they were his family. But how was he supposed to explain when he himself didn't understand why it had happened?

Kakashi found himself wondering if Obito's grandmother had still been alive at the time and was one of Itachi's many victims. Then he felt guilty for not keeping better tabs on the old woman's whereabouts, especially when she had been so kind to him over the years, even going as far as to bring him homemade bread.

Kakashi thought back to the previous night, when he had seen the Hokage at a loss for words when describing what had happened in their village. How could he possibly justify to his friends that he hadn't been able to do a thing to stop Itachi Uchiha when it was his job to look after him as his ANBU captain?

'And now they want to give me Sasuke in hopes that he doesn't turn out like Itachi,' he bitterly thought. How could the Hokage or council trust him, when he couldn't even trust himself?

He sat in the morning mist, silent with contemplation, for another hour. His shoulders hunched and eyes closed. Kakashi would have to ask for Obito's forgiveness in the future for not sharing more, but it hurt too much to do then.

When the sun finally rose above the Hokage Mountain, lighting the waking village with its warmth, Kakashi knew that it was time to leave. He slowly stood and stepped back into the dew-covered weeds; he made sure to correctly re-adjust his hitai-ate over his scarred, red sclera eye. "Sorry for being so quiet," he apologized. "There's more I want to tell you, but I have to go now." He looked to the south entrance, where he could hear the downtown start to come alive with its usual morning activity.

"It's a big day." He forced a smile beneath his mask.

Kakashi reached down and grabbed the bushel of dried sunflowers that he had brought before he had departed for Kumo. He would stop by the Yamanaka's shop at the next chance and buy a fresh bouquet to replace the old one; he thought lavender could be nice. Obito and Rin had both liked the smell of lavender. "I'll see you both tomorrow, then," he spoke coolly, bowing his head before turning on his heel and leaving the grounds vacant once more.

As he walked away, Kakashi wondered if he would ever want to bring Sasuke with him one day.

When he arrived at the hospital shortly after, only a few nurses and aids were on duty, milling through the halls with clipboards and miscellaneous medical equipment. He was glad that it was still early enough that the lobby was mostly empty; there were just a handful of civilians occupying the purple vinyl chairs that lined the walls. As he looked around, Kakashi made sure that his mask was secured over his nose, acting as a barrier between the stale air and his nostrils. He hated the smell hospitals; it always seemed to be the same combination of bleach, urine and sweat, with a slight metallic after note.

It was nauseating. The sooner he could leave, the better.

Stepping up to the reception desk, Kakashi tapped his fingers lightly on the green linoleum counter to garner the attention of the on-duty nurse. When she turned her head from the computer screen to greet him, her blue eyes widened in surprise. "Why, you're Kakashi Hatake!"

'Oh no,' he sweated, 'not one of them.'

Being one of the best shinobi in the village – not to toot his own horn – came with quite the trove of perks like top-rate missions, better pay, and more discretion on client approval. However, it also came with a fair amount of disadvantages – like girls constantly fawning over him. Kakashi had discovered that his talents brought the unwanted attention of many during his first year at the Academy, and as his fame – or notoriety, in some cases – rose so did the number of people who wanted to bombard him with affection. It turned out that with great power came great popularity. Not that he liked being so recognized. He didn't attend the Academy to make friends.

Ironically, this surge also made Kakashi very unpopular in the eyes of others; mainly those who were jealous of the adoration he received. Obito had been a prime example. Before becoming teammates and later friends, he had strived to disparage and call out the absurdity of the shallow adoration Kakashi received. It seemed that while most of the girls loved him, almost all the boys felt some form of animosity toward him. He had tried to explain that he didn't ask for the attention, but young boys easily became green-eyed when girls were involved. Luckily for Kakashi, as he grew older, the others matured as well and realized that he had never wanted the attention in the first place.

What Kakashi hated the most about it all was that those who fawned over him didn't even know him, not personally, at least. They weren't his friends, and he'd hardly call them colleagues, just strangers who viewed him as a sort of village celebrity. They didn't know his story or his struggles or his failures. They only liked the idea of him and what he could do. He was the son of the famous White Fang. He was born with a name that meant something to some, and people wanted to latch onto that recognition.

Asuma had told him he overanalyzed the situation and his bitter attitude toward people being friendly to him was why Kakashi had no friends. But he thought Asuma could be a prick sometimes. 'Like he can talk, leaving the village to be some wannabe rebel…'

Meeting the nurse and her unwavering stare, Kakashi was about to come up with some cold, off-hand excuse of how he had to go while still sounding polite enough, when the young woman stood abruptly, slamming her hands down and leaning over the desk. He noticed that her look of surprise had taken a turn toward irritation.

He blinked. 'That's different.'

"I've been warned about you!" she huffed, abruptly shuffling through the dark blue files on the desk. She bit at the inside of her cheek until her eyes lit up, having found what she wanted. The nurse produced a stack of papers and read over them, nodding her head slightly every few lines. Kakashi began to worry. Just how horrid was his reputation here that faculty members were put on alert by his mere presence? He didn't remember being that rude during his last appointment.

The nurse frowned and took a deep sigh; the expression on her face was a fusion of disappointment and perplexment. "Mmm-hmm," she hummed softly to herself, reviewing the notes in her hands, "Nana wasn't joking around when she told me about you. Though I'd say you're much more handsome than she made you out to be..." Kakashi was glad his mask covered the shade of red that tinged his cheeks. He had a feeling that Nana was the nurse who had been stuck helping him during his last visit.

"Uh, I'm sorry, I'm a little confused," he lightly chuckled, trying to sound innocent, "have I done something wrong?" Kakashi just wanted to know which wing they were holding Sasuke in.

The nurse, whose name was Chi-Chi according to the small brass nametag on the lapel of her uniform, gazed up at Kakashi, a manicured eyebrow arched sharply. "Let's see... your last check-up was nearly one year ago, your last physical even longer. You're missing several vaccinations and are due for two immunization boosters, vitals need updating, several blood panels were never finished, and you never showed up for your hernia or lung exam!" she read, head shaking with disappointment. "There's even a note here – well, a list really – of doctors and nurses who refuse to work with you! I don't know if I should kick you out the door or call in security to strap you down for treatment!"

Hearing the summary of his medical records read aloud – which he feared would turn into a full-on lecture very soon – was not what Kakashi had expected this early into the morning. Yes, he was aware that he skipped the last few examinations he had been scheduled for, but all for good reasons. Three of those times he was away on a mission, once he was busy helping Genma with document sorting that would have otherwise taken an additional day, and, well, he hadn't felt like going the most recent time he had received a hospital summons.

Besides, it wasn't like he was dying; he'd received no injury that he couldn't treat himself. While the dark circles beneath his eyes and the bruises that peaked from beneath the cuffs of his shirt were misleading, Kakashi was in excellent health and his body at its prime. And if he ever were in dire need of medical attention, then yes, he would go to the hospital. The occasion had just never arisen.

He could tell that Chi-Chi was still very new to working there. Her eyes still shone with a hopeful naivety and lacked the circles that so many of the other hospital orderlies had beneath theirs. He saw that her blue scrubs remained untarnished from any bodily fluids and were wrinkle-free; Kakashi would have guessed that it was still her first week. That meant that she was unaccustomed to his crafty ways of shaking all medical obligations. Though with her young and determined attitude, she may have just been bold enough to try and force him to receive his shots. He had to get out quick.

"Well, Miss, while I'm sure your files are in pristine order, I'm not here for myself today." The only time he'd come to the hospital for himself willingly would be if he were two breaths from dying. "I'm here to meet someone. And while I would otherwise humor you and allow a proper update regarding my files, this is rather urgent, I'm afraid. I'm supposed to meet the Hokage here."

The nurse froze, her face falling flat. "The Hokage?" Chi-Chi asked, brows furrowing. He quickly realized that she had no idea that the most significant person in Konoha was spending his morning at the hospital, too. Judging by the few heads that had turned at the mention of the Hokage's possible presence, it seemed that his visit hadn't been discussed at that morning's meeting.

Well, if the nursing staff didn't know where the Hokage was, they could surely point him to the room Sasuke was being held in. "I'm here in regards to the discharge of Sasuke Uchiha into my personal care." Saying those words aloud, and to another living soul, felt strange. He sounded like a worried father who had come to pick up his child.

Chi-Chi paled, and a look of worry overcame her gentle features. "I heard rumors about that poor boy. The only survivor of that horrendous incident, oh, it's just too horrible to think about!" she cried. "But I'm afraid that there's no Sasuke Uchiha in the hospital at the moment. And I would know because I've been working admissions for the last week."

'What?' That couldn't be right. He was sure that the Hokage had told him to meet at the hospital. With another glance at Chi-Chi, and then noticing that speaking the name Uchiha gathered some unwanted attention, Kakashi decided on another course of action. He wasn't going to get any answers from anyone there.

"You know, I may have made a mistake in where I'm supposed to go," he lied, wanting nothing more than to get out of the sterile waiting room. He would go to the Hokage Tower next; surely someone there could offer some insight on the village leader's whereabouts. "I think the rendezvous point was somewhere else!" And before the newly minted nurse could get one more word in, Kakashi had turned and walked out the doors, ignoring the faint whispers that followed him out.

He really did hate hospitals.

Outside once more, he breathed in the fresh morning air, allowing it to fill his lungs. It was already warm out, and the wind carried the sweet scent of fresh dango being sold from down the street. Kakashi's stomach grumbled, and he realized that the last time he had eaten anything was before he had been back in the village. 'I'll make just one quick detour, first,' he told himself, making his way down the street.

Kakashi never had much of a sweet tooth, but when he came upon the street cart selling freshly made rice flour dumplings, his mouth was near drooling. 'This will surely get rid of this antiseptic taste in the back of my throat,' he rationalized, eyeing the glazed balls of dough. Maybe he would buy one for Sasuke, too. Kids were supposed to like sweet things.

'Itachi liked dango,' Kakashi suddenly reminisced, thinking back to a night that seemed like millennia ago.

It had been during monsoon season, and Konoha was flooding. Kakashi had just finished briefing the Hokage on Team Ro's recently completed mission and was headed back home when he had come across Itachi, sitting in the middle of the street, ignoring the torrents of rain smacking against his lean body. Red flags flared in Kakashi's mind, and he promptly went to check on his new teammate.

Itachi had been very still, statue-esque, even. He sat with his back straight and legs neatly tucked beneath him, and his head bowed low so that his face couldn't be seen from far away. Kakashi had made sure to approach the boy slowly, careful not to startle him; he sent out a small wave of his chakra, too. Shinobi were taught early on that when advancing on a fellow ninja, it was never a good idea to frighten them; the number of kunai piercings and occasional face gouging spoke to the importance of this practice.

No one else had been around, the streets having been deserted in search of dry shelter. As Kakashi carefully came around to Itachi's front side, he noticed the ANBU mask, marked to resemble that of a weasel, resting upon his thighs. Itachi's hands were clenched into tight fists, the thin skin at his knuckles white.

As Kakashi began to kneel, Itachi's head snapped up. He still vividly recalled how the red of Itachi's Sharingan had glowed in the darkness of that night.

"How is it just to kill so many for the benefit of one person?" he had asked. The tone of his voice had been hard to place, as he hid his emotions so well. Even Kakashi had trouble getting a good read on the boy most of the time.

Knowing that Itachi was referring to the details of the mission from which they had just returned from, Kakashi took a moment to think over his response to the inquiry.

It had been Itachi's first mission as an ANBU operative, having been promoted to the rank not even a week ago. The task was simple: Ro was to discreetly infiltrate a small insurgent group that had formed outside of Wind Country's capital. Then, when the time came, destroy it from the inside out.

Konoha had received word that a group called Sons of the Desert was staging violent demonstrations in small villages, having become tired of the Wind Daimyō's apparent favoritism of Leaf Shinobi. It was believed that they were planning to assassinate the Daimyō. Realizing that Suna would have taken side with the insurgency, as the coup d'état would ultimately boost their profit, Konoha had been forced to step in and stop the attack. Ro was chosen for their efficiency and covert ability.

After staking out the group for two days, none of whom were shinobi but disgruntled civilians who wanted a revolution for their country, the ANBU team had struck. It was quick, reaching their desired results within minutes. Ro returned to the Hidden Leaf immediately, leaving seventeen dead in their wake.

The details of the mission had not been discussed previously with either the Wind Daimyō – who was seemingly oblivious to the unrest of his people – or the Yondaime Kazekage, who was becoming more agitated with Konohagakure each year. So Ro's mission was that of top classification, as it was a time of peace and interfering in another nation's government was strictly forbidden.

"I think that there's always a bigger picture to see, and sometimes it can be clouded by the actions we must make in the present," Kakashi had finally said. Killing the insurgent group was ruthless, and who were they to decide the dealings of another country? But he knew the truth, and that was that politics and shinobi business often became one and the same.

After the Third war, Konoha had been in desperate need of money for damage repair, and the Fire Daimyō could only fund so much. When the Wind Daimyō became willing to provide extra resources, now viewing Konoha as a stronger Hidden Village due to their victory, the Hokage couldn't refuse. So if the Wind Daimyō's seat of power were suddenly overthrown, then Konoha's economy would have quickly crumbled away.

Kakashi hadn't necessarily liked the idea, but he didn't have to. It was his job, and a true shinobi always followed orders. Even if it hurt the Hidden Sand Village, who they were supposed to be allies with.

'Only in the event of teammate jeopardization should mission orders be disregarded.' That was what Kakashi had come to accept.

"Sunagakure will retaliate," Itachi spoke, his voice cold as the rain. A splattering of black blood had stained his fair and otherwise unblemished skin, refusing to wash away even in the heaviest of downpours. "War helps nothing and only leaves good people dead."

Sometimes, hearing the way Itachi spoke, Kakashi had wondered why the boy chose the path of the shinobi, having harbored so much distaste for violence. Of course, his skill with the blade would never betray those feelings. And he didn't think that with his father being the acting clan head, Itachi would have been allowed any other option. Anything else would have been a disgrace to the Uchiha name.

There had been many things Kakashi could have done then in the pouring rain, but after a final moment of thought, the ANBU squad leader had reached out and helped to hoist his teammate back onto his feet. Itachi, no matter how skilled or smart he may have been at the time, was still a child. And there were a lot of things that took time – and occasionally trauma – to fully understand.

"Do you trust the Hokage?"

Itachi had looked up at Kakashi. "Of course," he replied, surprised that his leader would ever ask such a question. "The Hokage keeps the village safe and protects everyone who lives here. That's what I want to do, too. To keep my precious people safe."

That had been good to hear, and Kakashi had nodded his head in approval. "Then you have to trust that the Hokage knows what he's doing when sending teams out on missions. Even if they may seem wrong at the time, the Hokage always has the best interest of his people in mind."

Itachi hadn't said anything back. His chest slowly rose with each breath he took, and his eyes, having returned to their natural dark coloring, were focused ahead at the empty road.

Kakashi had placed a hand on Itachi's back and smiled. "Why don't I walk you home?" Itachi slowly nodded, accepting the offer. "But first, I know a place that's open late to grab a bite to eat, my treat." He hadn't wanted to leave Itachi alone at the time. As the squad captain, it was his job to make sure that his subordinates remained sound in both body and mind. Not that he had been all too worried about Itachi; the young boy was merely recovering from his first real mission. That was common for every ninja.

The two ANBU members, soaked to the bone and splattered with enemy blood, had moseyed down the backstreets of Konoha, seemingly ignorant to storm that beat down upon the village. "You said once that you like sweet foods, right?"

Blinking several times, Kakashi brought his thoughts back to the present. He now held two skewers of rainbow-colored dango in his hand, having unconsciously bought the delicacies while lost in the memory. He had forgotten all about that night until just then; it seemed so long ago, more like a dream than actuality. He wondered when Itachi had stopped believing in the Hokage and if that had been what led him to kill his family.

'Does Sasuke still believe in the Hokage? In our village? Does he even understand what that means?' he wondered as he carefully placed the sweet dumplings into containers.

"Kakashi!" came a voice from behind. "There you are!"

Turning around, Kakashi watched as Raidō Namiashi, came jogging down the street. Kakashi quickly nodded his head in thanks to the dango vendor one last time before walking up to meet his colleague in the middle of the road. "Yo," he greeted casually. He and Raidō didn't often work together, but they talked when both found themselves at the jōnin station.

"I've been looking for you!" Raidō responded hastily. A faint tinge of red graced his cheekbones, possibly from running around the village while searching for him. "The Hokage is waiting for you at the hospital."

Kakashi frowned. No doubt he would receive an earful later from one of the higher-ups for making the Hokage wait on him. "I was just there," he explained, pointing in the direction of the hospital. "No one knew what I was talking about when I mentioned him. And the nurse had no records of Sasuke having even been admitted. Figured I'd make my way to the Tower, but I got a little caught up thinking about some things. Sorry about that, Namiashi."

Raidō looked a little sheepish now and scratched his cheek. "No, I'm the one who should apologize. It was my job to keep an eye out for you and guide you to the proper location. I should have told them that we were at least expecting you."

"Lead the way, then. I don't think I can afford to piss off the council much more."

The two men jumped to the tiled rooftops and began running toward the hospital. Kakashi held the small paper bag containing the two orders of dango close to his chest. If he were lucky, they'd still be warm by the time they got there.

"We're keeping the Uchiha in a private wing that's held for village elites and visiting diplomats. It's a small annex building right off the back of the hospital. Looks more like an equipment shed than anything else from the outside," explained Raidō with a soft pant of breath. None of the civilians who walked along the streets beneath paid any notice to the two ninja as they blurred across the rooftops.

"The Lord Hokage wanted to keep all information regarding Sasuke Uchiha private and shared only between the need-to-knows. He didn't want any information getting out that could create a possible threat."

Kakashi understood the logic. They would have wanted to keep Sasuke out of the hospital's general population in case of a second attack – though the likelihood of Itachi returning while the entire village was on high alert was very unlikely. Also, due to the stress and gravity of trauma, Sasuke would have probably required specialized treatment that the civilian medics may not have been adequately equipped to handle. He wouldn't have been surprised if the Hokage assigned a team dedicated to treating the boy.

He then grimaced for a short moment, realizing that he had maybe given away too much information when he had gone to the hospital earlier. Kakashi had mentioned both the Hokage and Sasuke by name, and he knew that a good number of people present at the time had heard him. It had been a rookie mistake, made because he still wasn't in the mindset of taking this responsibility as a real mission. He would need to tell the Hokage of a possible information leak that could follow if any of those nurses decided to get gossipy later on. Kakashi was upset that he allowed himself to make such an error.

'This isn't about me, anymore,' he told himself sternly as their destination came into view. 'A kid's life is going to be affected by my decisions from here on out.'

The two ninja quickly arrived at the hospital, and Raidō guided Kakashi around to the back where they came across a small square building. It barely appeared larger than Kakashi's apartment. Raidō, noting his colleague's skeptical look, said, "Appearances can be deceiving. This is actually one of the most fortified areas in the village, believe it or not. There are even underground passageways in case of emergency."

'Huh, is that so?' Kakashi mused, giving the small building another look-over. And here he had thought that he knew all of the secrets in's and out's of the village. He then wondered why he had never been made aware of its existence, especially as an ANBU captain.

Raidō gave a small, quick series of knocks on the metal door; a moment later, it opened with an ANBU standing in the doorway. Kakashi knew that the man wearing the orange painted lemur mask was Gin Tetsuo, one of the older members of the elite force. The hollow, pinprick eyes of the mask didn't allow any kind of emotional display, so he could only wonder if Gin was surprised at Kakashi's current mask-less presence, or had been briefed and was fully aware of the situation. 'Does he think less of me now that I'm no longer one of them?'

Kakashi had never said anything to Gin in the past, but he highly respected the man's devout work ethics, and that he was known to be one of the best swordsmen in the Eastern Shinobi Nations. It was likely that only Kakashi's father would have been able to best Gin in an honest sword battle.

While all these thoughts poured through his mind, Gin Tetsuo remained stoic and silent. He gave the both of them a quick once-over and stepped to the side, allowing them through without a word. The door closed and locked with a reverberating click behind them.

Kakashi's eyes were forced to readjust to the brilliant white light that filled the building. The annex building was simple in design; a sizeable general room for the chosen medics to go over charts and other basic needs, and then several closed doors, marked to show what kind of room was on the other side. Kakashi observed that there were two operating rooms, one room for examinations, one for quarantine, and one for recovery. He assumed the others where he couldn't read the signs held more equipment and supplies. The specialized hospital branch was clearly only capable of treating a small handful of patients at one time.

At the center of the room was a circular desk, free of clutter and stacks of paperwork, unlike the counter at the main hospital's entrance. It was there that the Hokage was patiently waiting.

"You're late, Hatake," spoke the Sandaime. This was one of the rare occasions that Kakashi saw the Hokage without his trusted reed pipe. He assumed that the village leader wanted to respect the basic rules of the hospital, even though he had the authority to bypass them.

Kakashi bowed deeply. "Apologies, Hokage-sama. There was a confusion at the front desk earlier." He shuffled the dango bag under his arm, hiding it from view. The Hokage didn't need to know of his slight diversion along the way. "And I also need to confess that I may have shared more information than I should have. It was a foolish error on my part and it will not be made again."

The Hokage laughed lightly as Kakashi straightened his posture. He hadn't thought the Hokage would take the news of an intelligence leak so lightly; in fact, the Sandaime seemed to be in an unusually jovial mood at the moment. A stark contrast to his behavior the last time they met.

"No need to fret, my boy, no lives have been put at risk by your delay today," he said. "I'll have Yamanaka's team stop by the hospital soon, though, just to be safe."

Internally, Kakashi blanched. But weren't there? Wouldn't Sasuke's future wellbeing now wholly be dependent on his actions? Could his perpetual lateness somehow cause an event that would lead to Sasuke's demise? He didn't feel so calm anymore, realizing that the boy he was about to take under his wing indefinitely, was waiting just beyond one of the doors in front of him. The reality of the matter washed over him again in full-force.

He should have told Obito and Rin the full-truth earlier. If he could have talked about everything, really told them how anxious he was at least once, it might've helped his nerves.

The corners of the Hokage's lips quirked upward. "Don't worry, Kakashi," he soothed. "Knowing how your mind works, you are overthinking too many of the details." The Hokage picked up a glass of water that had been sitting on the desk but didn't take a sip. "It's just a boy, Kakashi. And as I recall fairly well, you were one not all that long ago."

Kakashi wasn't sure if that was supposed to make him feel better. Because with time, he had become well aware of how troublesome he had been for other people to deal with. 'The Hokage thinks that I'm fit for this responsibility, that I'm the one who should be entrusted with taking care of this kid. I have to believe in his decisions.'

It was like he had told Itachi years ago: the Hokage knows what's best for the village. Kakashi had to keep trusting that judgment.

"Why don't I introduce you now?" the Hokage offered and gestured a robbed arm toward the door closest to them. "He's been fairly quiet all day, but I'm sure that you two will be able to get along soon enough."

The Hokage walked up to the door, where two more ANBU stood on either side of the entrance. Kakashi didn't recognize either of them, however, and realized that they must have been new recruits; the swirled tattoos on the upper biceps were still fresh and scabbing over. He wondered if either knew that just a day ago, Kakashi would have been their superior in rank. The guards bowed and stepped out of the way, allowing the Hokage to open the door.

Kakashi's heart was beating exceptionally fast, but his face would never betray his emotions. He was the perfect picture of calm and collected, always had been. And he sure wasn't going to have this kid's first impression of him be that of a nervous wreck.

Kakashi wondered how Sasuke was feeling, if he was nervous too. 'Terrible, I'm sure,' Kakashi chastised himself. After having his entire world thrown up in flames, there was no conceivable way that Sasuke would feel anything else.

'Well, other than anger, sadness, confusion and everything else a kid that age feels,' he surmised. It would be foolish of him to try and think that Sasuke's thoughts and current emotional state could be so easily categorized right then. Sasuke was a distressed three-year-old who would be battling with emotions and hardships that no child should ever have to face. He knew that with time, he would have to address each aspect of Sasuke's trauma individually and with care, not pigeonhole the boy into one personality trait.

This really would be the hardest job Kakashi had ever taken on.

The Hokage turned the brass handle and pushed inward. Kakashi stayed behind, pausing for just another second longer. 'You can do this, Hatake,' he told himself firmly. 'It's just another mission. Another duty to be fulfilled. You've trained your whole life to adjust accordingly to the situation at hand.' He caught a glimpse of dark hair in the other room.

'Well, it's time to adapt.'

"Sasuke," he heard the Hokage say politely from the other room, his voice light and warm, not at all how it had sounded just last night. "There's someone here I'd like you to meet."

Knowing that was his final cue to enter, Kakashi released the breath he had been holding in, pulled out the now crumbled dango bag from beneath his arm, and stepped through the door to greet his new life.

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AUTHOR'S NOTES:

I hope that this chapter didn't disappoint and continues to live up to your expectations! I know I said Sasuke would be introduced in this chapter previously, but I decided that I wanted one last chapter of just Kakashi left alone to his thoughts. I figured I could use this chapter to lay down just a bit more foundation for Kakashi's current state-of-being. And don't worry, I don't plan on using so many flash-back sequences again.

I promise though, lil' Sauce will be here next time around!

Also, what would you guys think about future chapters being told in a different POV? Or chapters that have multiple POVs throughout? 'Cuz I'm still debating whether or not I want to keep this strictly in Kakashi's perspective or mix things up at some point. Thoughts?

And again, I'd like to thank Rhavia for being oh-so gracious and beta reading this chapter for me, even when they have so much going on in their own life right now, they still made the time to help me!

As always, constructive criticism is more than welcomed, and I love to read feedback about how I can improve my story.

Until Next Time...
Sunflower Skies🌻

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