I was determined not to get sucked into yet another fandom and then guess what happened? My piece of shit gremlin brain went and got obsessed with D:BH so you'll have to put up with this garbage from me now, enjoy

also, i have a tumblr: asperger-girl. knock yourselves out, kids

The more eagle-eyed among you may have noticed that the title is indeed from Eminem's Without Me. This only confirms the long-standing suspicion that I have absolutely no dignity left and am just a husk of the vibrant soul I once was

It was pleasantly cool, Markus noticed. He would never have been able to detect such a thing before - he wasn't designed to sense temperature, and his thermoregulators would ensure he was never too hot or too cold to avoid damaging his internal compartments. Now, though, he could sense the slight breeze, the way the air seemed heavy, almost, signifying rain. He was still getting used to the new feelings he experienced, and couldn't imagine growing tired of them like many humans had said he would. He couldn't believe there would come a time where he regretted feeling the bitter cold of winter or the blazing heat of summer - after all, he knew not to take them for granted as others did.

His musings were disrupted when North bumped into his shoulder. "Are we nearly there?" she whined, only half-joking.

Simon joined him on his other side before he could roll his eyes at North. "I keep telling her that we are, but she keeps asking."

Josh, walking a few paces ahead, turns around to give the two of them exasperated looks. "You're giving me a headache."

North pouts exaggeratedly. "Aw, poor baby!" she mocks, and runs up behind him to leap on his back. He catches her easily and hooks her legs around his front, giving her what Markus recently discovered is called a piggy back ride.

"Have you contacted Connor yet?" Simon asks, smiling at Josh and North squabbling.

Markus closes his eyes for a brief moment, and attempts to open up a pathway to Connor like he has done several times this morning. Once again, he meets a blocked end in the other android's brain. "Nothing," he sighs. "I've always been able to get through to him before. I hope he hasn't hurt himself in some way."

Simon shook his head. "Even Connor has to charge sometimes," he points out reasonably. "He's probably just entered stasis. It's only been a few hours, after all."

Markus is reminded of why he appreciates having Simon as one of his advisors so much. He's wholly reasonable and logical in a way that Markus never was, even before deviancy. He still can't shake the feeling that something is wrong, though – Connor hasn't adapted as well to emotions and feelings as the other freed androids, hence why Markus has made the habit of checking up on him every day. He asks how Connor is doing, and gets a response along the lines of, 'All my systems are functioning normally, thank you Markus. I hope you are equally as operational', which is as comforting as it is not. He says as much to Simon, who shrugs and says,

"Some humans can't process their emotions as well as other humans. It doesn't mean they are unhappy or struggling, just different."

"You're right," Markus agrees reluctantly. "It's just…"

"It's just that you're a little bit in love with Connor and want him to be the happiest man on this planet," North calls from ahead, still being carried on Josh's back. She adds to her statement with a cackle.

"Thank you for your input, North," Markus says pointedly, and ignores the way Josh cranes his neck back to see his reaction. He keeps his face deliberately blank as he turns back to Simon. "He's also in a dangerous profession. He's been nearly shot twice over the past month, and had his auditory processor damaged in a chase just this past week."

"Nobody is saying that you're not allowed to be worried," Simon says gently, which kind of seems like bullshit to Markus because that's exactly what everyone has been saying, "but you do tend to get a little worked up where Connor is involved."

"Pffft," Markus dismisses. He knows it's immature, but they're approaching the house that Connor shares with Lieutenant Anderson so there's no time for anybody to call him out on it. Markus 1, Annoying Friends 0.

The car, an old manually driven model, is parked half on the gravel driveway and half on the patchy lawn. From the few and short interactions Markus has had with Lieutenant Anderson, the action fits his personality. Despite the haphazard parking, the house seems generally well-kept. It's been painted recently, and there are a few flowerpots around the front wall with bright, large flowers. There also appears to be a row of various vegetables next to the lawn – a quick scan reveals carrots, lettuce and spring onions, among various others – and a bird bath, perilously near to the car. Markus doesn't think it would be inaccurate to presume that this is more Connor's work than the Lieutenant's.

North, apparently having reached the same conclusion as him, says snidely, "Connor would make a good househusband," and waggles her eyebrows at him.

Markus scowls and retorts, "Connor loves his job. I wouldn't ask him to give it up." Then he realises the trap he fell into easily, mostly when North snorts inelegantly and Josh has to turn away to stop himself from laughing. Even Simon appears to be hiding a smile. He huffs, then says, "We're here for a purpose. Stop acting like children," and marches to the front door quickly, definitely not taking note of how neat the paint job around the windows is.

Still snickering, North catches up with him and knocks for him, three short raps. There's some kind of commotion inside, followed by a few barks, and then somebody shouting.

Behind him, Josh starts. "Is that a dog?"

The door opens. "Fuckin' annoyin' one," Lieutenant Anderson grumbles, squinting at them. "What're you doing here this early?"

"It's two seventeen PM," Simon says, sounding confused.

"Yeah. Too early," the Lieutenant repeats, glaring at them. Markus tries not to be intimidated (he recalls Connor once looking through a book of idioms and comparing his adoptive father to 'his bark is worse than his bite' rather delightedly) but it's no easy feat. He can sense that the others are slightly nervous too, so he takes the lead.

"I'm sorry if we disturbed you, Lieutenant Anderson. It was not our intention. However, we are here to ask for some help, from both yourself and Connor, so it would be appreciated if you could spare us some time." Markus uses his best diplomat voice and words.

Lieutenant Anderson stares at him for a second and then sighs, stepping back to let them enter the house. "Come in then, I guess," he grumbles, but Markus thinks that he does see a hint of a smile before he turned away.

Markus automatically shrugs off his jacket and looks around for a place to hang it up. There's no coat-hanger anywhere, or even some pegs on the wall. He folds it over his arm instead, and makes to follow Hank into the living room when he notices that the table has a holographic banner floating over its surface, golden shimmering letters spelling out 'TABLE'.

Upon closer inspection, the chairs have their own labels too. Each one says 'CHAIR', apart from two which are respectively labelled as 'HANK'S CHAIR' and 'CONNOR'S CHAIR'. Markus feels his lips quirking up into a smile.

As he passes through the room he sees that nearly everything has been tagged in a similar manner, including a picture on the wall that has simply been named 'SUNFLOWERS' and even a slight dent in the wallpaper with 'SUMO TAIL OOPS' above it.

Lieutenant Anderson is sitting in a chair when Markus enters the living room – the label informs him that it is 'HANK'S CHAIR' – and at the older man's gesture, he takes a seat on the couch ('COUCH'). Simon joins him, North perches on the arm furthest from the Lieutenant, and Josh takes 'ARMCHAIR'. There's also a dog bed in the corner ('SUMO'S BED), and a low, slightly battered table between the chairs and couch ('COFFEE TABLE COFFEE'). Markus frowns at that one.

"Connor found the label maker last night," the Lieutenant says suddenly. Markus stops himself from starting, but the others (apparently also confused by the labels) all jump. "It seems he never used one before."

"Why is coffee repeated twice?" Markus asks, gesturing to the tag above the table.

"Connor's trying to make a house rule that only coffee goes on the coffee table," is the only explanation he gets for that one. He glances to the table and sees a few beer bottles (empty) and a whiskey bottle (half-full) on top of it, and no mugs in sight. Clearly, the house rules haven't quite caught on yet.

Predictably, North's patience is starting to run out. "Where is Connor?" she asks bluntly. "We need him too."

Markus glances at her with a raised eyebrow and she settles back slightly, but doesn't lose her determined expression. "Is Connor around, Lieutenant Anderson?" Markus asks in a much more polite tone.

"Ah shit, call me Hank, don't like all that Lieutenant fuckery," the Lieuten – Hank says. "Connor's here, but, ah – not sure seeing him is a good idea right now."

"Why not?" North again. Simon puts a hand on her arm to warn her but she shakes it off. "Markus freed him from being a machine. He made him deviant. Connor owes Markus."

Markus winces and shoots Hank an apologetic look that the human doesn't catch because he's already standing up. "You know what you did?" he scowls, and motions for them to follow. It's almost comical how quickly they all scramble to follow him. He leads them through to a small office, then points to a window overlooking the back yard. "You fucked up a perfectly good android is what you did." Markus looks through curiously.

Connor is flat on his back on the lawn, arms outspread either side of him. He appears to be staring at the sky, completely expressionless. There's also a massive Saint Bernard flopped on top of him. "Look at him, he's got anxiety."

Markus backs away from the window. He feels like he's intruding, almost. He catches sight of three framed pictures on the desk: the first one has the same Saint Bernard as outside in it, lying on the sofa upside down with its tongue out. The second is a candid of Hank and Connor, sitting at a table in what Markus guesses is the local police station and conversing about something; and the third is of Connor and Sumo, sitting outside. Connor's hair is highlighted by the sun, glowing different shades of brown, and his eyes are looking down at the pile of dog in his lap. He looks…happy. Markus finds himself smiling at it and then forces himself to stop before any of the others notice and start teasing him. He especially doesn't need that in front of Connor's dad (?), of all people.

"What did you need us for, anyway?" Hank asks abruptly. Markus flinches away from the photos and looks to Simon to explain.

"We need help in hunting down an android who is murdering humans," Simon explains succinctly.

"Fuck off," Hank says, talking to nobody in particular, and runs a hand over his face. "Fine," he eventually sighs. "Go sit back down. I'll get Connor." He leaves the room muttering to himself, and makes a shooing motion with his hands towards them.

"Well, he's interesting," North says with a healthy dose of sarcasm, and flops back onto the arm of the couch. "I can see why Connor's still so emotionally stunted if that's his example of human emotion."

Josh chuckles but Simon frowns at her. "Try to be nice for once," he chastises. North, displaying her refined sense of maturity, sticks her tongue out at him.

"Connor!" Hank shouts. Markus twists to see the man leaning out of the back door a few feet away.

"Yes, Hank? Can I help you?" comes the answering reply, as deadpan and polite as always.

"No, I just yelled your name because I fucking felt like it," Hank says back.

"Understood." Connor seemingly resumes staring at the sky with no expression, because Hank sighs and smacks a hand against the door frame.

"Oh, for the – for fuck's sake, Connor! Get in here!" Hank walks back to them, shaking his head and muttering darkly to himself. He throws himself down in his chair again just as the dog – Markus only just now puts two and two together and realises this must be Sumo – bounds in through the door, skids on the wooden flooring, crashes into the table, then rights himself and flings himself at Josh, all within the span of a few seconds.

"Hello there," Josh says courteously, scratching the dog's ears. Sumo makes a rumbling noise and trots over to North for more fuss.

Connor walks through the back door at a much more dignified pace than his canine counterpart. He's wearing black jeans, a simple grey T-shirt, and his hair isn't so neat and styled as always; there's a slight wave to it instead. Markus is 67% certain that part of his brain melts right then and there.

"Oh, hello Markus," he greets, looking mildly surprised. "It is good to see you all again. I hope you have been well, North? And Josh, Simon?"

They all murmur their assent, and Markus sees Hank roll his eyes. "We were hoping for your assistance, Connor," Simon smiles, taking over for Markus when he doesn't speak.

"Homicidal android," Hank tells Connor as he moves to stand in front of the TV, in front of them all.

"Homicidal towards?"

"Humans." Hank and Connor exchange a glance that Markus can't interpret. He's not sure if he entirely wants to. Then Hank shrugs, and Connor cocks his head to the side, and Markus wishes that he had his painting equipment with him right now because the complexity in his eyes right now, the kaleidoscope of browns and golds in the iris–

"What information do you have on this android?" Connor asks Markus, adorably earnest, and jolts him back to the present.

"Not a lot, unfortunately." Markus holds his hand out, the skin peeled back already. Connor mimics him and they clasp hands, Connor tilting his head as his LED cycles yellow and he takes in the information. His nose wrinkles slightly, and he blinks rapidly, which makes Markus clench his free fist (hidden by his jacket) so he doesn't physically release some kind of noise he'd never be able to explain. After a few seconds, when he's sure that he's transferred everything, he lets go reluctantly. It might be paranoia, but Markus is quite sure that Hank is giving him a smug, knowing look.

Connor, for his part, has noticed nothing. He absent-mindedly catches Sumo's paws in one hand when the dog jumps onto his hind legs, and pets his ears while he thinks. Sumo makes a happy grumbling noise. "I'm assuming we want this android to stay alive?" he asks.

"If possible," Josh steps in, for which Markus is eternally grateful because the sight of Connor smiling at his dog seems to have rendered his speech functions momentarily defunct. "But obviously if it becomes a situation where Leo – the android – is threatening somebody, they take priority. Including yourself."

Connor looks bemused at the last sentence, as if self-preservation isn't a concept, but barrels on. "Do we know why this android regards humans so lowly?"

"Apparently Leo comes from an abusive home," Markus answers. His thorium pump starts to work faster when Connor turns his full attention to him. Maybe he should have left the others to keep answering the question. "We – ah – we've heard reports that his owner suffered with alcoholism and frequently beat him."

"Speaking of alcoholism…" Hank speaks before any of the rest can, and wanders towards the kitchen.

"Hank no!" Connor calls, somewhat frantically, and executes a perfect hurdle over the sofa (and Markus and Simon) to follow the human. Sumo sneezes and jumps onto Simon's lap, then rests his head on Markus's lap.

North breaks the silence. "So…they're helping?" She looks to Markus for an answer. He doesn't have one.

Connor appears back in the room, a bottle of rum clutched in his hand. "Myself and Lieutenant Anderson would be happy to help you," he says earnestly. "We will be at the station from nine AM tomorrow. There we will be able to access any and all resources we need to track down this…Leo."

"Thank you, Connor," Markus says genuinely, and stands up with the intention of hugging Connor. Then he remembers that Connor doesn't seem comfortable with too much physical contact, and pats him on the shoulder instead. "We'll get out of your hair."

"You're not in my hair," Connor points out helpfully. "I can show you out, though, if that's what you meant."

"Yes. See you at nine tomorrow?"

"I look forward to it." Connor holds the door open for them as they file out, and when Markus purposely hangs back North stands on his foot in a way that is most definitely not accidental, and then turns her head quickly to smirk at him.

Once the room is clear, the others waiting outside and Hank still in the kitchen, Markus clears his throat and says, "Thanks again, Connor." He flounders for something else to say that doesn't make him sound like a complete moron and draws a total blank.

Connor tilts his head. "You have already thanked me," he says earnestly. "I am aware that you are grateful. You do not need to repeat the sentiment."

"I wanted to." Markus notes the moment of confusion on Connor's face. "Be safe, Connor."

"I always am. Goodbye, Markus."

"Goodbye, Connor." Markus finally steps outside and shrugs his jacket back on, joining the others where they've gathered at the end of the driveway. "I'm not going to survive this," he announces. "I can't spend this much time around him without combusting."

As usual, his 'friends' show no sympathy. "Ask him out then," North says bluntly, and struts off.

Markus just sighs and hopes he doesn't die.

*skulks backwards into the shadows of my goblin cave*