Author's Note: Wow it's the last one... thanks for following me on this 58 minute journey

Edward awoke to one of the strangest things he'd ever tasted being poured into his mouth, he tried to push whatever it was away, but his body didn't seem like it wanted to respond.

"Brother! Don't move okay, just stay still for a little bit-"

"Al? What's goin' on?" His tongue felt numb.

"You got Petrified," Al answered. "The potion will take a few minutes to take full affect okay?"

His neck unstiffened enough for him to be able to look around the room, seeing various students, Nearly Headless Nick, and Minerva getting the same treatment. Draco's back slowly straightened out, Colin Creevey's arms lowered to the rest of his body, and the first year girl he'd apparently failed at protecting slowly straightened out her legs.

"Did anyone d-"

"No-one died, the trio and the Weasley twins managed to kill the Basilisk," Al explained quickly.

"Basilisk, that's what that thing was?" He questioned. Al looked at him funny, but then got an enlightened and annoyed look on his face. "The Truth?" Al nodded.

"I don't understand though… If the kids were able to handle it… then why did the Truth even send us here?" Al whispered.

"Maybe we aren't done yet… maybe the real problem hasn't even started," he whispered back.

"A lot of things have happened since you were petrified," Al agreed, "Lockhart's in a coma."

He nearly shot up, but his lower back didn't seem to be moving yet, "How the hell did that happen?"

"He got caught lying about his books, he'd never done any of it-"

"I KNEW IT!" The few students able to move their necks looked at him weirdly.

"-he tried obliviating Harry Potter, but he ended up hitting Draco's dad instead," Al whispered.

"How'd he end up in a coma then?" He frowned.

"He jumped out of a window a floor too high, hit his head," Al explained.

"Dang," he whistled. As his stomach returned to normal it gave a rather loud growl. "I am, starving. Let's get some food-"

"Brother!" Al whined, "Your legs aren't even awake yet-"

"I'll crawl then," he argued. Madame Pomfrey laughed as a house elf appeared with a large tray of food. "God bless house elves," he cheered, grabbing the first thing he saw and stuffing it in his mouth.

"One of the after effects of Petrification tends to be a bit of lingering hunger," she explained, carefully side stepping around one of the house elves.

"Just like old times then," Ed cheered, stuffing his bottomless stomach. Alphonse looked exasperated, but he didn't care. His entire body felt stiff and uncomfortable, and if he could feel his feet he would've already tried jumping out of bed.

Draco Malfoy was getting a rather hearty hug from his mother, as were most of the children. Colin Creevey's little brother had leapt up on his bed, and his father was laughing.

"Where's the old man at?" He asked, stuffing a bread roll in his mouth.

"In the library I think, he said he wanted to talk to you privately," Al responded, picking a grape off his plate. He stretched his arms high above his head, listening to his joints, both flesh and metal, as they creaked and cracked in relief. A few parents stared, but none of the kids were surprised, they'd all probably seen it before.

He ate until he could feel all of his body parts again, stretching his legs out multiple times. He still felt hungry, but at least he should be able to make it to the Great Hall for, looking at the clock, lunch.

"Brother why don't you wait a little longer-"

"Nope, I'm getting up Al, I've been sitting around long enough," Ed argued, stretching out his knees one last time before planting his feet firmly on the floor.

"You were petrified not-" Al stopped when his metal leg suddenly dropped his weight, quickly reaching over to catch him. "Brother! I told you to wait!"

"Yeah, yeah, I know," he grumbled as Al pushed him back onto the bed. He rolled up his pant leg, shocking more parents, and flipped open the external shieldings one at a time. One of the wires was slightly frayed, but it didn't seem like it was a problem. "I don't see anything," he frowned.

"When's the last time you oiled it?" Alphonse asked.

"Uh…. what month is it?" He asked, and Al squinted.

"End of May," he answered, suspicious.

"So that would be… six months?" he admitted sheepishly, and Al smacked him on the arm.

"You," he grumbled frustrated, "Oh I'll be right back," he cut himself off stomping lightly away.

"Oops," he sighed to himself, closing most of the automail back up. The first year girl and her parents slowly made their way out of the room, probably heading to the Great Hall.

Alphonse came back soon enough with the oil can that Hagrid had gotten him much earlier in the year, and one of his robes, and he quickly got to work on the joints, being careful as to not stain the hospital sheets.

The next time he got up, his leg thankfully didn't collapse on him, and he was able to get to the door by himself. Al made him put the robes on before they left, giving Minerva a chance to catch up, and space for the other students to sneak by.

"I must say, I do feel rather peckish myself," She admitted. They slowly made their way down the hallway, hearing the volume increase as they approached. "Must be a feast."

They were somewhat caught off guard as they got to the open doors, him more so than the others, as he was abruptly tackled off his feet by the Weasley twins. "Professor Ed!" They cheered as they landed on the ground in a tangle of limbs.

Minerva laughed wholeheartedly as Ed grumbled to himself. "Alright Al, back to the Hospital Wing we go."

"Oh don't be silly," the twins laughed, getting up and both reaching an arm out. He took their hands and they yanked him right back up, dragging him right to Gryffindor table as they got cheered in by students and staff alike.

"Is that all of them?" Lee asked as they sat down, Minerva heading towards the staff table.

"Still waiting on Malfoy, mom's probably breaking the news about his dad," Fred added. Sure enough Draco and his mother walked in, cheered in by all, regardless of house. They took a seat at the staff end of the table by themselves as Dumbledore rose.

"Welcome! To all of our students, staff, and ghosts-"

"EXCEPT GILDEROY GOLDILOCKS!" The twins shouted.

"Ah yes, except for Professor Lockhart, who, will not be returning for the rest of this year, or the next," Dumbledore announced, and everyone, unsurprisingly, cheered.

"Now, while this isn't technically the end of term feast, I'd like to say a few words anyway," Dumbledore decided, and everyone cheered. Him and Alphonse tensed slightly. "Baubillious, Hershey, Streetcar, Beryllium. Enjoy!" they both sighed out in relief.

"Oh yeah Dumbledore said something weird last time didn't he?" Fred questioned.

"Yeah, Hermione was gonna look it up… can't remember it for the life of me though," George shrugged. He and Al both stayed quiet, instead piling up their plates with food.

"What else did I miss other than all the big stuff?" He asked, stuffing turkey in his mouth.

"Uh, Quidditch got canceled, so nothing there," Lee shrugged.

"Oh yeah we wrote you a note on your chalkboard every day for fun," Fred laughed.

"Should I be concerned?" He frowned.

"Probably," George grinned.

"Only three more years," Ed sighed sarcastically.

"You wound us Professor," George cried, clutching his chest.

"Then go see Madam Pomfrey," he replied, taking a long sip of his goblet.

"Damn… 10 more points to Professor Elric," Lee laughed.

Ed let the others talk, listening in every once and while. It didn't feel like he missed much, but it felt like he missed everything at the same time. Severus and Minerva were laughing about something, some annoyed tension off of their shoulders now that Lockhart wasn't butting in every three seconds. Draco Malfoy, went from popular, to excluded, to purposefully avoiding his housemates throughout the course of the year. The Gryffindor trio, as always were whispering and laughing with each other, making small talk with their other friends occasionally, Neville going on about the mandrakes that probably saved his life.

Luna Lovegood, as always sat alone.

"Hey Al, I'm gonna go say hi to Luna," he explained, getting up from the bench. A few eyes followed him as he sat down next to the strange girl.

"Oh, hello Professor Ed, I'm glad you're back," she grinned.

"I'm glad to be back."

Her eyes flashed from grey to red, "You did well little al-chem-ist."

"I didn't do anything, not really," he admitted.

"But you did, everything's changed a little bit, the future of this place looks just a bit brighter… You're not done yet though."

"I figured."

"I'd reward you but, I think you still might be needing those metal limbs… Talk to Hoenheim… keep… existing," Luna's eyes flashed back to grey. "Sorry did I miss something?"

"Nope," He lied, plucking a bread roll out of the basket.

"Oh good," she sighed. "Any ideas for the last two weeks of class?"

"I'll see what Al's been doing, figure it out from there," he shrugged.

She hummed in acceptance, "I think I might go check on Ginny," she decided. They both got up, going to different points at Gryffindor table.

"-So I've got my wand up Lockhart's Portraits nose, George has set the classroom on fire, and Angelina's still got four shots of butterbeer left- Oh hey Ed," Fred waved, pretending like he hadn't noticed him walk over.

"Nice try," he smiled, and the twins pouted.

"Damn you Professor Ed," George croaked, sliding dramatically off the back of the bench.

"Foiled us again," Fred added, sliding right off and landing on his brother, who groaned in pain.

"These are two of my best students," Ed sighed, and Al laughed quietly.

Edward headed up to the library after the midday feast, and the room was almost hauntingly silent. It took him a minute to find Hoenheim, deep within the library, 'sitting' on the floor with a book.

"Hey," He sat down to get his attention.

"Edward, I see that you're alright," The ghost smiled faintly.

"Yeah, you'd better not start crying," Ed grumbled, stretching out his legs, and leaning back against the bookcase.

"Of course not," he sniffled, and Ed rolled his eyes.

"You wanted to tell me something?" He asked.

Hoenheim gained back his resolve, "Several things actually… We never did really get the chance to talk other than the basics…"

"I'm guessing you already talked to Al?" Ed questioned.

"That does seem to happen, doesn't it," Hoenheim sighed. "The Basilisk was released by Ginny Weasley, not of her own free will of course," he explained, "She was being controlled by a fragment of a soul, the soul of the man known here as Voldemort."

"I thought he got killed twice already," Ed frowned.

"And now he has been killed thrice," Hoenheim agreed, "Voldemort's soul is split many times across this world… That's not supposed to happen. The Truth was worried with all of the power he's amassed, he might find his way out of this world. The future of this world was so in flux that there was no way of figuring out which way it could end."

"So he sent me and Al... and you I guess," Ed reasoned.

"Correct," Hoenheim answered, and Ed examined the look on his face.

"You didn't… you didn't die trying to bring us back, did you?" He questioned quietly.

"No," he admitted, and Ed sighed out of relief. "I didn't think you were dead… it was… odd."

"That little girl, Mei," Hoenheim sighed, "She was distraught for a while when neither of you returned. The other Xingese boy, Ling, practically had to carry her away."

Ed frowned, he had thought about the others a lot, but he'd nearly forgotten the small girl. "What about Winry?"

"She seemed rather confident you'd return eventually…" Hoenheim said, smiling. His face turned somber however, "Unfortunately, we may have another problem."

"Like what?"

"The truth was able to bring my soul to this world, even though I had not entered a human transmutation."

"So?" He frowned, "What are you getting at?"

"Maybe it was because I was dead… Or maybe the truth might pull over the other two human sacrifices if he deems it necessary."

Ed gasped, "You mean Mustang and Teacher?"

"Maybe, maybe not," he admitted calmly. "We don't know how this could turn out, maybe he can only do it when human transmutation is performed, or when one of them dies. We might not even have to worry about it."

"But if it does?" Ed frowned again.

"Your teacher is easy enough to explain I suppose, but Mustang?" He questioned, and Ed cursed.

"Family friend? Izumi's brother maybe, they could probably pull it off if it came to that, he's good enough at lying," Ed planned, and Hoenheim shrugged.

"It sounds like good enough of a plan for now," Hoenheim agreed. The conversation had seemingly ended, so he began to push himself up off of the ground. "Oh and Edward?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't forget to plan your lessons, you still have class tomorrow," the old man grinned.

"Hey! I know what I'm doing!" he shouted back, and the old ghost laughed.

"QUIET IN THE LIBRARY!" Madam Pince shouted, and Ed jumped up.

"You did that on purpose didn't you?" He grumbled.

"What can I say, you are fairly predictable," Hoenheim laughed quietly. Ed waved to him tiredly before leaving the library.

When he walked into his classroom he wasn't too surprised by the redecorations, although just like the twins claimed, there was a rather lengthy note on the board.

Day 61,

Today is the last day without Professor Ed, who we have given our souls

We have been empty without him, our hearts filled with nothing but alchemy chalk.

Percy was transformed into nothing but a wooden exterior of his boring self in an accident,

without your wisdom, we have no knowledge. Harry and Ron lived after transmuting the basilisk

into a large duck, ignoring your philosophy. Hermione has eaten all of the alchemy gloves, and

now burps out wooden twigs whenever she laughs, we missed you Edward

3 the weasley twins

Edward laughed at the strange note before deciding to leave it up. A house elf apparated into the room, holding a large jug, and an obscenely large jar of corn.

"You requested this be delivered to your classroom?" The house elf held up the bottles questioningly.

"Yup! Thanks," Edward gladly took the bottles, tucking them behind his desk as the house elf apparated away. The desks had all been transmuted back into large logs which were fused against the walls to prevent any accidents. He left all of the beanbags and pillows as they were, setting large pots by each seat.

"Professor Ed!" the Weasley twins cheered. "I think you've seen our note?"

"Yes I have," he admitted, putting the last pan down.

"Don't worry about missing the other sixty-" George assured,

"I think Ron wrote them all down," Fred added, laughing.

"What's all the pans for?" Lee Jordan asked as he walked in the classroom.

"You'll see," Ed assured, sitting on top of his desk as they waited for the other students to come in.

Once everyone was seated, he got himself prepared.

"Professor Ed, what's with the pans?" Lee asked again.

"They are for your exams," Ed grinned, and everyone groaned.

"I thought Dumbledore cancelled exams?" Graham Montague questioned.

"Well this is my class and I can do what I want," Ed cheered, and the students groaned. "You will be using all of your knowledge that Al has taught you about Firework and Water alchemy over the past weeks to do something extremely dangerous."

"Like what?" The twins questioned as he leaned over the back of his desk, grabbing the two bottles.

"We're making popcorn!" He cheered, and all of the students sighed in relief.

"Nearly gave us a heart attack!" Fred laughed as he drew the boiling transmutation on the side of the board next to the note. Other house elves arrived as they drew out their transmutation circles, carrying all of the toppings he'd requested over to his desk. He thanked them all before they left, and the students all put their pots over their transmutation circles.

He went around pouring the oil and the popcorn, and soon enough the windows had to be opened due to the reeking smell of oil in the air.

By the time class ended everyone was munching on popcorn, and luckily the Weasley twins knew a spell to clean out the pots, so the next class could have the same surprise. He hid everything back behind his desk as the bell rang, and the fourth years filed out with their popcorn.

The first years filed in just as confused as the last class, sidestepping pots as they sat down.

"Why the pots?" Ginny questioned, banging it lightly against the floor. Luna shrugged at her.

"Finals," he answered. The first years were in more uproar than the fourth years. "We're doing an extremely risky transmutation, using the skills Alphonse has taught you in order to make-" he grabbed the oil and corn once more, "Popcorn!"

"Bloody hell Professor you scared me," Ginny sighed, mirroring her brother. Her classmates laughed.

"Ah Edward there you are," Dumbledore sighed as Ed cleaned up his classroom for the last time, although his classroom still slightly reeked. "I was coming to ask what you and your brother were planning to do for the summer."

"Uh well I was uh-" he stammered uncomfortably.

"You're welcome to stay here just like all the other teachers," Dumbledore laughed, and he sighed in relief. "Just doing a headcount, that's all."

"Ah," he sighed, transmuting the last pot back into the large metal rod it had been before. "Who else is staying?"

"All the same as last year I think, if you're worrying about sneaking around Madam Pince, she will be going home again," Dumbledore joked.

"Jeez Dumbledore, I'm not that hard to convince," he joked back, fusing the metal rod to the wall.

"Just two weeks left, I'm sure for you the school year's gone by rather quickly," Dumbledore admitted somewhat darkly.

"Well, I missed two months, so I guess so," Ed shrugged, putting back on his jacket before following Dumbledore out of the room. "McGonagall doing alright?"

"She's doing fine, and probably doing a much better job teaching than I had," Dumbledore admitted. "Is Alphonse already at dinner?"

"I sent him ahead," Ed agreed.

The great hall as usual was booming with laughter, and for once he actually went up to the staff table.

"Ah, the child has finally decided to grace us with his presence," Snape commented sarcastically.

"Love you too Uncle bird nose," he replied, sitting down next to Minerva who stifled her snickering in her goblet.

"Speaking of children, are you still sixteen Edward?" Minerva questioned quietly.

"Uh… what date is it?"

"June 5th," Snape commented dryly.

His eyes opened, "Nope, tomorrow."

"Your birthdays tomorrow?" Minerva questioned.

"Oops," he shrugged, eyeing the annoyed look on her face. "That's not a holiday when Dumbledore's supposed to roller-skate around, is it?" he joked.

"How do you forget your own birthday?" she mumbled to herself quietly.

"So besides the end of year feast it's basically the end right?" He asked Severus.

"Yes, that is the last major event of the year," He confirmed. "Assuming the heir of the Leprechauns doesn't suddenly attack," he added jokingly, and Minerva whipped off her hat and tossed it at him.

"Don't joke about that Severus," she frowned, although Ed thought she was hiding a faint smile.

Edward awoke early the next morning when a flaming candle nearly set his hair on fire.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY PROFESSOR ED!" The Weasley Twins cheered, laughing as he rolled off the back of his bed. Alphonse was laughing by the doorway, where he'd clearly let them in.

"How old are you anyway?" George questioned as he pushed himself off the ground.

"Three thousand and eighty four," he lied, sitting back on the edge of his bed, thankful he fell asleep in his clothes for once.

"Blasphemy, you look no older than two thousand," Fred gasped, flapping his hand dramatically as Ed blew out the candle.

"Our little boy's all grown up," George wiped away a fake tear.

"You callin me little?" He grumbled pointedly.

"Oh no of course not," Fred denied.

"We're calling you our tiny little midget!" George laughed as they both dashed out of his room, tossing the cupcake into his face as a last resort.

"Brother DON'T!" Al shouted as he ran out of the room.

And that was how he spent the first twenty minutes of his birthday, with frosting melting down his face, and automail foot banging against the floor as he chased the Weasley's from the second floor, all the way to the door of the Gryffindor common room, where the fat lady refused to let him in.

McGonagall, of course hearing about it, spent the first three minutes of lunch laughing at him with Snape. A minute later he and Al joined them too.

Author's Note - Was that a great ending, probably not. Am I going to continue into the next book, who knows, definitely have to reread and see how many plots are screwed, I dunno if the Buckbeak thing can even happen but boy will I check. It would be smash-uploaded like this though, have a good night/day peeps