How to Train Your Dragon belongs to Dreamworks and Cressida Cowell. I own only this recipe and my worldly possessions.

This recipe is meant as a joke. Please do not, under any circumstances, take this seriously. This recipe might be offensive to some people, and I, as the writer, would like to apologize beforehand:

SORRY.

Pishyou, sit back and enjoy.

How to Make Your Very Own Hiccami(?) Fanfic

Thou shalt require:

1 ooc movie!Hiccup

1 ooc Astrid

1 ooooooooooc Camicazi

100 packets of jelatin sheets

1litre warm water

a handful of unlikely events (the unlikelier the better)

1 cup of badd riting skeels

2 tablespoons worse grammar

3 teaspoons badd spaling

1 overactive imagination

a tonne of 13-year-old rabid female hormones

* note that this recipe does not require anything that remotely resembles a plot.

Step the one:

First, prepare the jelly mixture. Heat the water over your Flamehuffer dragon until it starts to boil. Then, take it off the heat and add your jelatin sheets. Stir well for 5 minutes. The mixture sholud have a jellous consistency.

Step too:

Add your ooc Astrid to the mixture. Stir until well combined. The result should be a jellous ooc Astrid. Set this aside for later use.

Step tree:

Introduce your ooooooooooc Camicazi to Berk. Make Hiccup look happy about the arrival of his " childhood sweeetheeaart / beeeest friieeendd". Astrid will, of course, be jellous.

* Note: Your ideal oooooooooc Camicazi should have 'long straight glossy blond hair falling over her back' and 'pearly white teeth' and, if desired, a 'curvaceous figure'. *hurk* Not to be confused with a politically incorrect suicide bomber.

Step for:

Add everything to a pothole in the road. Whisk briskly using your bare hands, making sure that the badd riting skeels, worse grammar, and badd spaling are evenly distributed.

Step faif;

Spoon a generous helping onto your fanfiction website of choice. Garnish with an irrelevant cover picture if desired. Serve. And by 'serve' I really mean 'shove this repulsive mess into the face of some random unsuspecting passer-by'.

*The author of this recipe wishes to apologize for any harm dealt to your mental and emotional wellbeing, your retinas or your ego.*

THANKEE FOR READING