A series of gentle, light hearted oneshots about the Service Club and everything that entails.
AN: I usually consider myself pretty bad at summaries/blurbs, but I don't think there's much to say other than that. This is where I'll be posting my less depressing material.
This one shot focuses on Yukino.
Thus, the Service Club Continues to Deny
New Year's Resolutions:
New Year's Resolutions, Yukino thinks, are a concept so brazenly human. It is part of our very nature to be unsatisfied. There is a reason, she thinks, that it is in the Ten Commandments of one of the oldest religions in the world to not covet a neighbour's possessions. We have a way of being jealous even if there isn't really any particular motive to be jealous. Even if we lived in a house made of gold, we'd probably manage to convince ourselves that our neighbour's house, made of paltry timber and wood, was somehow superior.
We're trapped in an endless cycle of wishing for betterment, and dissatisfaction when that betterment turns out to be less than it seemed.
It's depressing to her that she's thinking so pessimistically. There are many traits she shares with her fellow Service Club member, Hikigaya Hachiman, but she wishes one of them were not a tendency to, as he puts it, 'monologue'. But, then again, pessimism isn't hugely dissimilar to realism, and she's always seen herself as realistic.
She's never really had any need for New Year Resolutions before. Yukinoshita Yukino is aware of the esteem surrounding that name at Soubu High, and though it may be a little arrogant, she's always thought that was rather deserved. She studies diligently and is top in most of her classes as a result- even without revision, she'd be higher than most. She knows that she's pretty; the multitude of rushed confessions she's received over the years suggest as much. Before the Service Club, she'd thought these were the only things that mattered.
Friends have a weird habit of changing the way you think.
That's how she's ended up sitting at her desk at home, with a notebook on top of it and a fountain pen in hand.
Trying not to think too much of her bizarre, rather convoluted reasons for arriving at this point, she set about putting the pen to good use.
1: ...
Sh thinks for a moment. What should the first of her resolutions be, she wonders?
She doesn't have to think for very long.
1: Ensure grades remain exceptional.
This one is common sense. They were a semester into their third year, and university is looming above them. If she wants any hope of realising that old, almost antiquated, dream of changing the world then she needs high attainments.
However, that has been something of an unspoken New Year's Resolution for years now. A subconscious mantra that echoes in her mind whenever she studies.
Her second also comes quickly.
2: Collect and continue to support the latest line of Pan-san merchandise.
Does this resolution even need explaining? Pan-san is a gift to this world, and it should be mandatory in her eyes to buy said gifts.
Her third, however, requires a little more thought.
3: Strive to always return Yuigahama-san's texts.
She glances at the words she's written. It's indeed true that her friend gets pouty with her whenever she neglects their mobile conversations, but they don't quite capture her compulsion in the way she wishes.
She crosses it out.
3: Communicate more with Yuigahama-san.
This is better, she thinks, nodding. She wants to be more open with her friend, despite how embarrassing it may seem at times. In fact, why not incorporate that feeling?
3: Communicate more with Yuigahama-san, even if instinct suggests you shouldn't.
Those are her New Year's Resolutions. Written in immaculate, swirling kanji, waiting to be carried out with her usual determination to succeed.
Only there's another.
She sighs and crosses her arms, a little childishly. The slightest hints of a flush are emerging on her cheeks. This is futile, she thinks. I should be focusing on the important aspects of life, not... not nonsense of this kind.
Yet, pushing aside her numerous misgivings, Yukino picks up the fountain pen once more.
4: ...
She contemplates for a while longer.
4: Change...
She crosses it out.
4: Improve...
More thinking.
4: Improve relationship prospects with Hikiga-
She frantically crosses it out, blush rapidly increasing in colour like cherry blossoms in the spring.
4: Improve relations with Hikigaya-san.
Better. It seems more disconnected, but is still open to misinterpretation. Imagine if her Nee-san discovered this (which knowing Haruno, she probably would). She'd never hear the end of it until the day she died.
4: Improve friendly relations with Hikigaya-san.
Better still, but... the words feel hollow. It's as if she's lying to herself, and Yukinoshita Yukino never lies.
She inhales deeply, and drops the pen in exasperation. Her fingers clutch the hem of her school skirt. Why is this so difficult? It's just Hikigaya-san. Gross, stupid, perverted, fear-of-chastity-loss inducing Hikigaya-san.
But also... but also kind Hikigaya-san. Determined, considerate, observant, culturally aware, endearingly socially inept, admittedly not ugly Hikigaya-san-
She buries her head in her hands in embarrassment, knees held closely together.
This is futile, Yukino repeats to herself.
But another part disagrees. Perhaps it's the perfectionist in her- though these New Year's Resolutions aren't exactly the most important piece of work she'll ever complete, she'll hate herself it if they're left incomplete. Thus, after a few moments of internal consternation, the pen finds a way back into her hand.
4: Do not insult Hikigaya-san at every available opportunity.
Valid, but not quite right.
4: Attempt to be more companionable with Hikigaya-san.
Too generalised.
4: Talk to Hikigaya-san more regularly and with more transparency.
Too specific.
4: Attempt to appeal to Hikiga-
She draws multiple lines through this one. Her blush is turning from pink to scarlet.
4: Convince Hikigaya-san of your innumerable attractive qualities.
Isn't this just rephrasing her last dismal attempt?
She refuses to give up, but is beginning to get the sense that's she's hit a brick wall, with no visible way of getting around it.
Then, suddenly she has the right wording, as abruptly and without warning as a flash of lightning. Slowly, she lowers her pen to the page.
4: Grant Hikigaya-san's request.
He asked for something genuine.
So far, for better or for worse, the Service Club has always satisfied their clients. Yukinoshita Yukino has no intention of changing that now.