What. The. Fuck.

Okay. Homunculus did not automatically equal evil, Ed, don't jump to conclusions without the facts. Greed hadn't been all bad, right? A dick, yeah, but so was Loki, so maybe general dickery was to be expected with homunculi.

But Loki couldn't be a homunculi; he didn't have their instant healing factor.

But he did have an awfully elitist view of the world sometimes.

Still, he didn't seem to have any absurdly special skills, not like they did.

He'd called Ed and Roy 'you humans', though.

Fucking hell, why was Ed even bothering with these mental gymnastics? There was a lady right fucking here, the one who'd dropped this bombshell on them without warning in the first place, and it was a waste of time to start conjecturing when she'd probably invalidate half of his thoughts in seconds anyway.

Loki didn't look too shocked by the statement. More resigned than anything, really. A little more surprising was the lack of surprise on Al's face.

Wait, did he know about this? And he didn't tell any of them? Al was entitled to his secrets, and yeah, Ed could get behind interpersonal confidentiality, but with something like this, that would have an impact on all of them? It stung.

And of course, there was the matter of the guy mind-controlling others with a glowing rock. Even a homunculus shouldn't have been able to do that, but then, Father had defied a hell of a lot of logic, so fuck knows what was possible. If you'd asked Ed a few years ago, he would have said shapeshifting was impossible. Was it Father or someone else? Ed forced himself to tune back into the "conversation" happening around him.

"…How does my race have anything to do with what's been going on?!" Loki was yelling, his shoulders rising defensively. Any semblance of calm he'd regained since his last outburst was out the window, and Ed wasn't denying his own part in the escalation with the shouting.

"I'd say it's pretty damn important!" Edward yelled back.

"Who do you work for?" Roy said, his voice raised so he'd actually be heard.

"Just calm down, guys!" Al cried, his hands raised in a placating gesture. Madame Christmas was holding her head in her hands, her grimace probably partly in thanks to the volume in the room.

"This is irrelevant to the situation – "

"Yes it fucking is relevant!" Ed couldn't believe this. Irrelevant? Even assuming Loki was being honest in saying he wasn't one of the bad guys, this would have been good to know.

"Is it Father? Did he send you?" Roy took a threatening step towards Loki, who didn't back down but straightened even more to tower over Roy. Al tried to defuse the situation, but neither of them were paying attention to him.

"Guys, please, let's just calm down and talk this out civilly – "

"From what you've told me, the creature you call Father is dead. I never met him," Loki hissed.

"Then who made you? Homunculi don't just make themselves," Ed snapped. "He's the only one we know about who had that sort of knowledge!"

Loki threw his hands up in frustration. "I'm not a homunculus, you imbeciles! Mustang here confirmed that himself the first time I met you!"

"Don't drag that into this," Roy growled. "I could have been wrong. There's a lot we don't know about homunculi. King Bradley didn't heal, either."

"Everyone shut up!" Al shouted, forcing himself between Roy and Loki and shoving them apart. Well, sort of. Only Roy actually got pushed back a couple of steps, but Loki obligingly took a step back on his own a second later so it didn't make much of a difference. Ed got a sharp glare from Al when he opened his mouth to keep arguing – what can he say, he's got a "volatile personality" – and Al took the brief silence to let out a longsuffering sigh.

"We're all adults here," he said, fixing both Roy and Loki with pointed looks. "So act like it. Let's talk this out calmly and rationally and maybe we'll actually get somewhere."

Neither of them looked especially chastened, but no one started yelling again so Ed supposed Al's outburst could be considered successful enough. Al was good like that – he was so soft-spoken most of the time Ed forgot just how much influence Al could have over the room if he really tried.

"So, Madame, is Loki a homunculus or not?" Roy asked, a lot more calmly this time.

"No," Madame Christmas said irritably.

Oh, great, now there was something other than a human or homunculus? What the fuck else was there? A Philosopher's Stone, like Hohenheim had (sort of) been? A chimera? Or something else completely? The possibilities made Ed feel uneasy. "Then what the hell is he?"

She shrugged, which was an even more vague and frustrating response than he'd expected. Fucking hell. Ed barely knew this woman – he'd met her for the first time a few days ago while she was brainwashed. But considering she was apparently related to Roy he kind of expected someone… well. Someone not like her. "You can't just drop a bomb like that and not have anything to back it up with!" he snapped.

"None of you have an ounce of patience," she said, glowering at Ed with bloodshot eyes. "He's not a human, homunculus, or whatever other weird shit you kids got mixed up with in the past. Maybe if you just asked nicely he'd go ahead and tell you, instead'a goin' on the defensive."

Suddenly, something clicked in Ed's mind. "Wait a second," he said. "The price you paid, what Truth took from you. Did it take away whatever made you not human?" It would make a lot of sense, especially regarding the mystery surrounding the seemingly nonexistent toll Loki had paid. Even while believing he was being honest in saying he'd been forced through the Gate there were so many details that just didn't line up, and the lack of a quantifiable toll had been at the forefront.

Ed couldn't be sure, but Loki looked almost approving. "You really are smarter than you look. You are correct. Physically, I am currently no different than you humans."

Ed raised his eyebrows, torn between curiosity and annoyance. "Okay, got that. But what on earth did Truth take from you? What were you? A chimera?"

"An Asgardian," Loki said haughtily. Almost as soon as he said it a stricken expression flashed across his face, disappearing as suddenly as it showed up. What was that about? Madame Christmas was looking at Loki strangely too. Ed wasn't the only one who noticed, clearly.

"He's lying," Roy said, his gaze focused on his aunt (whose existence Ed still hadn't gotten over, by the way. How had he never known about her before this?).

She stared at Loki for a few long seconds, and he stared back just as intensely. Whatever she saw made her shake her head. "No. He's not lying."

If Ed hadn't been watching Loki as closely as he was, he would have missed the flicker of relief at her confirmation of his claim. Ed wasn't convinced she was telling the truth, and he doubted Roy was either.

"So, then, what exactly is an 'Asgardian?'" Roy asked, apparently deciding not to keep arguing over it.

"To the humans in my world, Asgardians are commonly considered gods," Loki said. Despite the arrogant words he didn't really sound like he believed what he was saying.

Ed snorted, unable to resist. "So you're a god? Is your title the 'Guardian of Asses?'" Loki looked at him strangely. Ed grinned sharply. "You know. Asgardian? Ass-guardian? Come on, I can't have been the first to come up with that one. Your people were asking for it with that sort of name."

Any lingering goodwill in Loki's expression was chased away by a glower of pure poison, though Ed thought he detected a hint of mirth. Roy's eyebrows were raised like he couldn't believe what he'd just heard come out of Ed's mouth. Alphonse was wearing the Don't-Be-a-Shit face. Or possible the My-Brother-is-a-Goddamn-Moron face. Sometimes it was hard to tell the difference.

But some of the stifling tension had dissipated, so Ed was gonna count it as a win.

"I am the God of Mischief," Loki sniffed.

"Oh, that's much better," Ed scoffed.

Roy rolled his eyes. "You still haven't explained what an Asgardian actually is, and what makes them different from humans."

"Asgardians are an ancient race of warriors," Loki said. "We may look similar to you humans, but physically we are much more powerful, with much longer lifespans."

"How old are you, then?" Ed asked.

"One thousand forty-six," Loki said coolly.

"Really?" Al said, leaning forward with interest sparking in his eyes. Ed raised his eyebrows, caught off guard by Al's easy acceptance of Loki's claim. Yeah, he was definitely pressing Al about this later. How much did he know already?

"How the hell did you end up in Amestris?" Roy questioned.

Loki's hands clenched briefly, an air of discomfort briefly flickering over him. He didn't want to talk about it, that much was apparent. "I fell into a place known as the abyss, and awoke in Truth's domain. I should have died. I'm uncertain why I didn't, why I encountered him instead, and quite frankly it's irrelevant in this matter. I don't wish to speak more of it."

"So long story short, you lost your… Asgardian-ness to Truth?" Ed queried. Yeah, he was an asshole, but considering how open Loki was being right now Ed didn't want to push his luck by digging too much into an obviously sensitive subject.

"More specifically, my Asgardian physiology and my ability to use seidr," Loki said with a nod.

"Cider," Ed said flatly. Either Ed was missing something, or there was one more screw loose in Loki's head than he'd thought.

"You lot would likely refer to it as magic," Loki clarified.

"Yeah, right," Ed said.

"You expect us to believe you can do magic," Roy said, his tone hard to read. "Right after you tell us your nickname back in your home was the 'God of Mischief.'"

Loki quirked an eyebrow. "Well, yes."

"He's tellin' the truth," Madame Christmas said, earning incredulous looks from both Roy and Ed. She pinched the bridge of her nose in a way that was almost identical what Roy always did when he was frustrated. "Which out of us just recovered from goddamn mind control? You all got a nice, close look at what a magic stick from his part'a the universe can do to people here. If anythin' can serve as proof, I'd say that's at the top of the list."

"It didn't even work right," Ed said. "I saw Halcrow touch Loki and Roy with it, and nothing happened to them."

"It wouldn't work on you either. Think about the common denominator, something both Mustang and I have in common that almost no one else in this world does," Loki pointed out. "It's only a theory, but I believe encountering Truth renders us immune."

Roy folded his arms, eyeing Loki contemplatively. "Are you sure?"

Loki nodded slowly, clearly giving his answer some thought. "As much as I can be. I wouldn't recommend allowing the scepter to touch you regardless, but considering we're the only two who seem to have escaped unaffected by its power it seems a likely assumption."

Well, at least Ed wouldn't have to worry about being mind-controlled, then. The reason behind Loki and Roy's apparent immunity was good to know, but also troubling. Rather than a hit-and-miss sort of power, it meant that almost no one in the world would be able to withstand it.

"Good. I hope you're right." Roy turned to Ed and Al. "Edward, Aphonse. Are either of you able to get in contact with that teacher of yours? Izumi, was it? She performed human transmutation too, didn't she?"

"Izumi Curtis," Ed said, his mind spinning as his eyes lit up with understanding. "As long as she's not out traveling, yeah, we can reach her."

"Do you think she'd be willing to lend us a hand?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I think so." If Loki was right, this was huge. They'd tried to avoid involving too many people because of the high risks involved – if anyone who knew their plans got brainwashed, they'd have to completely scrap it or risk the enemy knowing their every move. Fuck – Hawkeye getting brainwashed was such a bad-case situation, too, considering just how much about them she knew. Thank Truth they'd only decided to bring Knox into the fold after she'd been mind-controlled, or they would've been discovered ages ago. "I'll call her and see if she can come down for a while."

"You do that," Roy said. "We need everyone we can get, especially if she's immune. I'm going to contact General Olivier Armstrong, too. I doubt Halcrow – and whoever's in control of him and the others – has made it up north yet, and she's in a much better position to help prevent this from spreading than we are."

"I'll go call Teacher right now," Al said. "The sooner we get her help, the better." He stepped out of the room.

Loki looked at Madame Christmas. "What was the name of the one in control? Did he tell you?"

"Thanos," she said. The name meant nothing to Ed, of course. Roy and Al looked just as clueless as he was.

Loki…

Well, the way Loki was eyeing the second-story window like he was gonna dive straight out of it suggested he knew who it was, and saying it was bad would be an understatement.

In Asgard, it was rare to hear of a foe powerful enough to genuinely pose a threat to Odin, much less the realm as a whole. Loki had never been quite sure if this was because the number of such formidable beings was truly so small or if it was because no one was bold enough to suggest Odin's power wasn't all-reaching.

Still, rumors trickled in from the far corners of the universe, whispered in seedy establishments and travel hostels. Most were unsubstantiated or greatly exaggerated, but there were a few recurring ones that seemed to hold some truth.

The underlying aspects of the rumors surrounding the Mad Titan were not only consistent enough to indicate truth, but saying they were concerning would be the understatement of the millenia. Not that Odin or Thor ever would have listened to Loki if he'd said so. Or most Asgardians, really. Loki could hear Thor now, believing himself powerful enough to defeat any enemy who dared challenge him.

"But he's never faced me in battle, brother," Thor would say, grinning that brightly naïve smile of his, fist thumping against his chest. It would reek of certainty more than arrogance, because Thor would wholeheartedly believe in his own strength and have trouble even fathoming the kind of danger Loki understood existed out there. He'd yet to understand just how insignificant Asgard was in the grand scheme of things. It was but a tiny speck within the dizzying vastness of the universe.

Loki himself wasn't entirely sure just how powerful the Mad Titan was. It was hard to tell, given the nature of second or third-hand rumors (and there were virtually no first-hand accounts because they rarely survived to give it), but he believed enough to know he would never wish to face the Titan in any sort of battle. Nor did he wish to join him. Loki was a great many things, most of them unpleasant, but even he had no desire to take part in the systematic genocide of half the universe.

If the buzz was accurate and Thanos had indeed been killing such a massive number of living creatures without any true challenger, there was no doubt in Loki's mind the Mad Titan was one of the most dangerous opponents he could ever have the misfortune of encountering.

Almost no one was even willing to say the Titan's name aloud.

"All right, I'll bite," Mustang said. "Who's Thanos?"

"Someone I would rather have died than ended up facing," Loki said shortly. The room's temperature felt like it had dropped significantly, and he resisted the urge to rub his arms to chase away what he was reasonably certain were nothing more than imaginary chills. "Be thankful his influence in Amestris is limited. If he were here in person, he would have disposed of us all long ago."

"But what does he want?" Edward asked.

"To kill half of the universe." Loki needed to leave. This was getting to be far more serious than he'd thought. He needed to get that scepter now and take it away, as far away from here as possible. Perhaps Truth had the capability to keep it hidden. Even Loki, with all his vast knowledge of the universe, had never heard of Truth. It was likely his best opportunity to prevent the Mind Stone from returning to Thanos's hand.

To prevent the annihilation of 50% of this world's population.

Edward seemed to mull this over briefly before responding. "What a stupid goal. What is he, Stock-Villain Number Five? He just wants to see the world burn and shit? Even Father's motivations were better than that, and trust me, they were pretty unoriginal."

"Don't joke around about this," Loki said sharply, scrubbing a hand over his face before forcing himself to take a deep breath. "Most of what I know of him is conjecture, but I believe his motivation is to 'bring balance to the universe' through the deaths of half of everyone."

"That makes no sense," Edward grumbled.

"I don't pretend to understand his underlying motives," Loki said. "I've never had the misfortune of encountering him until now, and quite frankly I'd like to get back off his radar as quickly as possible." Not that he had much of a chance of doing so. He doubted Thanos would forget him easily.

"Don't do anything rash," Mustang said. His sharp eyes were studying Loki carefully, as if he could tell exactly what Loki was planning. Perhaps he could. "We've played this sort of game before. Impulsiveness will only get us all killed. I know we haven't been on the best of terms in the past, but you're someone I want on our side. You're too smart to let an impulsive decision do you in, not this late in the game."

"Call your General friend," Loki said, not harshly. Damn this lot for making him feel even the slightest bit of sentimentality. "If she can spread the word outside of Central City like you say, then we may be able to prevent a great many deaths."

Mustang was still watching Loki like he expected him to make a run for it, but after a few moments he nodded. "I'll contact Major Armstrong as well. We've been here too long already. He'll be able to set us up with a new hideout and get Madame Christmas and her girls out of the city until this all blows over. Fullmetal, you up to giving him a call?"

Edward's expression twisted in a dismayed scowl. "I've told you not to call me that. And do I have to?"

"Would you rather call General Armstrong?"

Edward's scowl twisted even further, taking on a note of fear. "One call to Major Armstrong, coming right up."

"I already knew you weren't the sharpest knife in the block, Mustang, but it seems like my opinion of you was still too high," Olivier said, her voice dripping with flat, icy disbelief. Roy grimaced, suddenly thankful for the hundreds of miles separating them. "What the hell is so bad in Central that you'd ask me to spend my valuable resources shutting down the trains leaving the city? Behind Grumman's back? I thought you two were deep in each other's pockets. And why are you being so goddamn secretive about it?"

"I don't think you'd believe me if I explained it without you getting to see it for yourself," Roy said wryly. He hadn't exactly picked up the phone expecting Olivier to do what he asked, even if he'd harbored a (very) faint hope she would. She was way too much of a pragmatic to believe something that sounded as crackheaded as mind control. Hell, even Roy himself was still questioning the legitimacy of it. He dug his fingers into his side, letting the sharp spikes of pain radiating from the bullet wound remind him that he couldn't afford to make any more mistakes.

"I am not about to get involved with another coup d'état without a damn good reason," Olivier snapped. "Especially after your men blamed the last one on me. Don't think I didn't notice you called from an outside line. Do you not understand just how catastrophic the effect of a total railway shutdown would be? It hasn't even been three years since the last government upheaval, and here you come swaggering along wanting to do it all again?"

"I'm not staging a coup d'état, General," Roy said, an edge of irritation creeping into his voice. "Grumman's been compromised. I can't get into the details over an unsecured line, but you have got to understand how serious this is. People – civilians – are dying, and because almost no one understands why nothing's being done to prevent this from spreading beyond the city. I'm probably too late to stop it entirely, but we need to stem this before this whole damn country comes apart at the seams!"

There's silence for a few moments, and Roy almost thought she'd hung up on him until she let out a sharp exhale. "I can't shut down all the lines. I don't have the manpower for that sort of undertaking. But I'll covertly send out some men to make it difficult for trains leaving Central to reach their destinations, at least in the North and East. You'll have to find someone else to handle the West and South – they're too hard to reach from here without making a stop in Central first."

"Thank you," Roy said, relief and gratitude alleviating just the edge of the tension in his muscles. "I couldn't ask for anything more."

"It's already way more than I should be offering," Olivier said, her tone holding no trace of amusement. "You owe me, Mustang. Big. You'd better have the best damn explanation I've ever heard for this. I'm giving you a chance because you showed some promise during the fight with those homunculi, more than most of you cowardly Central lot, but don't believe for a second that I'm doing this because I like you."

"Of course not," Roy said. He'd half been expecting her to reject him completely, and at most he'd been expecting her to agree to stop trains coming into the North. That she was offering to do something for the East as well was huge. "I'll explain everything as soon as I have the opportunity."

"Well, you won't have to wait long for it," she said, and he froze.

"What do you mean by that?"

"What, you expect me to just sit up here while something supposedly serious enough to destroy Amestris is going on? What kind of woman do you take me for?"

No. "No," Roy said sharply. "Stay away from Central. I'm serious. I am not letting you put yourself at – "

"Don't treat me like some delicate princess who needs to stay sitting up in her palace," Olivier growled, and Roy could feel the ice radiating from her voice.

"Of course not," he snapped. "It has nothing to do with your skills, and everything to do with the fact that we've already lost major players and can't afford to put more at risk. If Central falls, you're one of the only high-ranking officers still in the game. We need you to be able to do what's necessary if it comes to that."

"If you had an explanation for all this mystery that was even halfway decent, maybe I would," she said. "Get off your high horse. I'll be in Central within a few days, and you'd better be ready to cough up your secrets when I get there."

The line disconnected, and Roy was left staring at the receiver with too much nervous adrenaline coursing through his veins and nothing to take it out on.

"God damn it," he hissed, slamming the phone down and stalking out of the room. He shouldn't be so surprised, he reminded himself. What had she done when she'd found out about the widespread corruption in the brass the last time? Killed one of them and strutted right into their ranks while making no secret of her actions, that's what. God, he should have seen this coming.

If she was able to keep herself out of their clutches, she'd be an invaluable ally, but losing her could have catastrophic effects. So much for that safety net.

He'd have to lose Falman and Fuery for now, too. The North and East should be covered, but there was still the West and South to consider. There wasn't much traffic between Central and the South, but several major lines went from Central to the West. If he could get in contact with Lieutenant Colonel Miles he could probably count on the South's protection, so he'd send Falman and Fuery to the West for now. It had the added bonus of getting them out of the immediate danger, though Roy was wasn't thrilled about sending them off.

Roy hadn't missed this. The subterfuge, the risk, the possibility of catastrophic loss if anything went wrong. And like last time he'd have to rely on an unpredictable, dangerous ally. At least Laufeyson seemed less inclined to brazen murder than Scar had been, but that wasn't very comforting. He'd seen the look in Laufeyson's eyes. If he thought things weren't moving fast enough, Roy had no doubt Laufeyson would leave them all behind. They couldn't afford to lose him.

They had to prepare for war.

A/N: I had this whole explanation of my thoughts on Loki probably being mind-controlled The Avengers to add clarity to some of Loki's thoughts this chapter, but the Marvel wiki beat me to it by confirming the theory. Here's a link to an article about it, if you haven't heard the news.

I can't wait for the next chapter, you guys. There are some awesome characters slated to show up very soon. Some that were mentioned in this chapter, and others that shall remain a surprise~