Chapter 6

Harley curled around herself, talking herself through another unfriendly bout of bitter coldness seeping through her body. She noted in the back of her mind that this was her first episode since coming to this world, a lot better than what she'd been going through back home. Better but not any less unpleasant.

Harley had once associated cold with happiness, back then thought she knew cold. When cold meant a giant coming to save her from her relatives. When cold meant cool air hitting her face as she dived down to catch the snitch or the snow nipping at her nose as she, Hermione and Ron huddled together trying to solve a mystery or another.

The cold meant comfort and butter-beer, cold meant sneaking around in a drafty castle, Cold meant not having to go back to Dursleys, and sometimes, sometimes she just wished it stayed cold forever.

Then came a frigid December, carrying with it the hurt of a friend lost and the feeling of never being warm. When fire couldn't be hot enough and even wrapped up in each other's arms she and Hermione spent each night hoping they'd wake up the next day, not because they wanted to but because they had to. Cold then meant numbness of her fingers and the frozen tear tracks on her cheeks as she stood in front of her parent's graves.

Cold meant struggle.

Cold meant dark days and fear.

Cold meant sorrow.

Then it was gone. The fear, the fear was gone. It went out in a flash of green and Harley, Harley waited. She waited and waited, days and nights but the cold, the cold didn't go away. It stayed, wrapped around her heart, pulling her towards something she didn't understand.

So now, now cold meant pain.

Pain and numbness.

Harley shivered as she wrapped up the blanket around herself tighter. She whispered the incarnation of the warmth spell constantly under her breath with trembling lips. It would be over soon, she told herself like always.

Breathe in.

Out.

It was a lot better than it used to be but that didn't mean it didn't hurt. She winced as swallowing caused pain in her throat. She slowly got up from her bed, the blankets pooling around her.

She'd learned a long time ago that whenever she woke up due to the cold, it was better to keep moving. Giving in to the cold just made it last longer.

She wobbled a bit but managed to stabilize herself by putting a hand on the wall wincing once more as a different type of pain went through it. Right, she had forgotten to put the salve on her burnt hand last night. With that thought, she made her way to her desk.

Taking the salve from the drawer, she applied it all over her hand, her other shaking so bad that a bit of the salve actually dripped on the floor. She then took a second to just lean against the desk and intake a deep shuddering breath.

Don't give in.

Walking away from the support took some effort but she managed it, reminding herself of everything she needed to do today. Everything that needed her attention and why she couldn't afford to just lie down. On her way out, she instinctively grabbed Sirius's jacket. It almost never failed to help warm her up. She didn't bother putting her arms through it and just draped it over her shoulders for the time being.

She was tired enough that seeing the little boy perching on top of the refrigerator didn't even scare her, rather she just held out her arms. Perhaps Yael knew she wasn't in the mood for any banter or that she needed the comfort right now because he allowed her to pick him up and carry him to the sofa. She sat down and cuddled the boy close to her chest. Yael shifted a little and rested his head under her chin.

Harley mindlessly ran her fingers through the golden curls, watching as they bounced back. She held on tight, the warm weight in her arms comforting her, keeping her grounded. She vaguely registered a small hand playing with the earring dangling from her ear.

After some time, as the shivers and the pain stopped, she allowed herself to close her eyes and rest. Knowing that she could push herself to work but that until the more severe effects passed she was hardly going to get anything productive done.

"As much as I love cuddling, we really need to discuss a battle plan."

Her eyes snapped open only to see that a cheeky ten-year-old had replaced the toddler in her lap. She rolled her eyes before pushing him off the sofa, which wasn't that satisfying as he just floated midair instead of falling down.

"Cuddle snatcher," Harley mumbled grumpily ignoring the Cheshire-like grin on his face going perfectly with him floating upside down," What do you want, Thanatos?" She asked," Except talking to me in riddles, that is."

"Actuaaaaaly," He drawled, " what I wanted is this ," He pulled out a wand from under his shirt, wait, she checked her holster, he had pulled out her wand from his shirt.

Harley eyed him, feeling wary by the scheming look on his face, " What are you doing with that?" She asked tiredly.

Thanatos turned so he was upright once more, he floated in the air as if he were laying on some invisible bed and held the wand suspended between his two hands.

He answered her question with a grin, "This," and with that, before she could even think or move, the air front of her burst into a blazing fire, the light nearly blinding her as she blinked to chase away the spots. That's when she realized it was her wand that was burning, her eyes widened, as her breath hitched. The wand turned into ash within a precious few seconds. Like it was never there, to begin with.

He destroyed her wand. He destroyed her wand. He destroyed her wand .

It wasn't computing. Harley stared at the ashes before looking up at him with blank eyes,

"My wand," She whispered in a state of shock," you burned down my wand,"

"Yep," he simply stated.

"The only weapon I had," She couldn't take her eyes off the remains of her wand, she had once fixed her holly wand with the Elder wand but how did one fix the Elder wand? Her holly wand no longer worked for her, how was she supposed to-how-

She wanted to scream hysterically but only a breathless sound escaped her lips, "Why? H-How is that supposed to help me? Why-Why did you do that Than? " Her eyes searched his eyes for some answers, she couldn't even bring herself to be angry. She didn't have enough energy for that.

"So that it can be a part of you, " He said nonchalantly, floating the ashes, now enclosed in a glass vial, towards her.

Harley cradled the vial between her hands, "So what am I supposed to do? Mix it with water and drink it? " She allowed a bit of her anger and disbelief to coat her words. She remembered his absent comment about her wand being a weak point but she didn't expect him to do this .

She almost felt physical pain looking at the condition of her wand. It was more than just a piece of wood, it wasn't just a wand, it was hers like she was its.

"Don't be silly," He looked disappointed like she should've figured it out by now, "You make it a part of your body." He crossed his arms and tilted his face to look at her.

"Part of my body?" She asked carefully, her fingers still moving over the vial as if her gentle touch might bring her wand back.

"Yep," He grinned cheerfully, "Permanent part."

She stared at him in question. Her mind wandered over how exactly could she make a vial of ashes a part of her body. It took a few moments before she hesitantly asked, "So like a tattoo or something?"

Thanks looked thoughtful, "You know what." He pointed at her, "That's not half bad. You can have it turned into the ink and then it becomes a permanent part of you. You would still be able to use it of course."

"That would be useful," She absently said. Thanatos looked smug at the cleverness of his plan and even Harley reluctantly praised his plan in her mind, even if the wand burning had given her a mini heart attack.

Wait-

"What did you want me to do with the ashes? " She asked, dreading the answer.

Thanatos cackled in a rather villainous manner. Somehow she was suddenly completely sure that she didn't want to know what he had had in mind, it was most-likely painful and nightmare-inducing.

Finding a tattoo artist in New York was relatively easy. Finding a tattoo that she wanted, on the other hand, not so much. The tattoo artist was kind enough not to question her insistence of turning the ashes into ink. She wondered whether he was just too used to weird stuff to question her or maybe it was the fact that she had paid in advance a hefty amount for the session.

It took about three to four hours for the artist, Mike, to complete her back. Unlike how most people made it sound like, she didn't think it was that bad. It wasn't the most painful thing she had gone through, not even in the top ten. Honestly, it was actually kind of relaxing.

She just laid down and closed her eyes as the sound of the machine working filled her ears, it was exciting knowing that something she had designed on a sheet of paper was now going to be a permanent part of her. Plus the advantage she would gain by not having to depend on a wand was worth all the trouble. She could cast most everyday spells wandlessly but still needed the wand on the battlefield. Now she could have it with her, always.

After the last stroke was added, she got up, almost immediately realizing that she was going to need to take a muscle relaxant to help her stiff neck and thanked Mike who grunted in reply. She then proceeded to leave as quickly as possible.

"What did you get!" Thanatos was almost shaking with excitement from where he was sitting on the kitchen counter. She grinned and took off her jacket, turning her bare back towards him. A laugh almost escaped her at his horrified gasp.

"What have you done ," He pointed an accusing finger at her.

Harley looked at the tattoo in the reflection of her refrigerator and grinned. The deathly hallows symbol rested proudly between her shoulder blades but instead of the elder wand, there was a scythe in the middle of the triangle. Thorny vines wrapped around the handle while the circle representing the stone enclosed a flower, a lily to be more accurate.

" You've ruined my symbol ," Thanatos whined dramatically putting a hand on his forehead.

"I've improved it," She grinned at him almost leaning against the refrigerator, before deciding otherwise, her backless shirt provided little to no protection, "Plus, it's our symbol, remember?" She added.

And that was the reason she had decided to get the symbol done, there was nothing else that she'd rather have on her body. It was hers in a way nothing else could be, the flower though was something she added at the last minute. A lily, a flower that symbolizes death and peace, a symbol of purity and restored innocence, and for her, a symbol of love. The love of a mother, the love of a companion. Just...love.

'The ones that love us never really leave us. You can always find them'

She blinked away the slight wetness in her eyes.

There was a moment of silence then Thanatos groaned, "I guess it looks fine," with that he rolled his eyes. Death loved stability and was very possessive but she could see that Thanatos was pleased with her choice, despite his theatrics. After all, what better way to show death's possession of her.

"Wait," He was suddenly in front of her pointing an accusing finger at her, " This was revenge for the wand thing, isn't it? Isn't it?"

Harley just smirked.

Hello everyone,

Soooo some of you may have noticed that this is a part of what used to be the previous version of chapter 5. To be honest: I didn't like chapter 5.

I disliked the way it was written, disliked the flow and the only reason I posted it was because I had no idea whether I had it in me to rewrite it once again...turns out I did I have it in me. I split the chapter into tiny fragments then rewrote every part that bothered me...so pretty much the whole chapter. I am much happier with chapter 5 now. Plus I separated this chapter from chapter 5 because it always felt like a separate chapter to me than a part of the other one.

For anyone who has re-read chapter 5 and remembers the previous version, Let me know what you think of the new version. Which version do you prefer and why?

Now that I have fixed the things that bothered me about this story, perhaps I can finally get back into writing it. Anyways Thank you so much for reading. I'd love to hear your thoughts even if it is a one-line.

-Marey