I love you, Lucy, and every goddamn time I try to express it, you kick me out and push me away!

You don't get to want more!

Those words had enraged him far more than anything had in his entire life. His confession wasn't exactly the best, but he didn't expect her to tell him that he had no right to feel what he felt.

But she was alive. She was home. She was alive.

He thought his feelings would ebb away, but seeing her standing there after three weeks of being missing, his feelings hit him full force. He couldn't move. But Lucy could.

She pushed herself off of Laki and ran down the open aisle down the center of the guild hall - people parting to avoid being caught in her way. Next thing Natsu knew, he was being tackled to the ground, her arms wrapping around his neck and legs around his waist. Slowly, he brought himself to touch her, one hand going to her back and the other resting atop her head, feeling the soft hair he had so missed.

"Lucy -"

"Natsu," Lucy whimpered out. She was crying, body shaking with her sobs. "You were right. I was afraid. I'm sorry - I'm so sorry."

He wanted to tell her not to apologize, but he couldn't bring himself to speak. He buried his face in her neck and inhaled deeply.

Lucy…

"I thought I'd never get to tell you - we… the mission - they showed up and we couldn't… we didn't know what to do, we couldn't fight them alone; they were too strong and - and I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have said those things… I shouldn't have been so afraid!"

"What?" Natsu finally found his voice, but it sounded broken even to his own ears. He moved his head back to look at her, but she kept her face buried in his neck. "Who showed up? What happened?"

"A dark guild. A big one. I - I don't remember their name, but they attacked and we - we fought but they were too strong and there were too many and it was so sudden that we…" Lucy clutched at his scarf, her knuckles turning white. His blood began to boil at what she was saying and he clutched her more tightly to his chest. "If Crime Sorcière hadn't shown up when they did we may not have made it."

Natsu looked up. Some mages were still watching them, but others were tending to the injured Fairy Tail members and also speaking to Jellal and Meredy who had accompanied the group back to the guild. He hadn't noticed them earlier, but to be fair, he hadn't noticed anyone or anything except Lucy.

Enraged flames began to build within him. He should have been there. This stupid mission shouldn't have happened without him. Once one week was up, a search party should have been sent out. Makarov should have allowed him to look for them, dammit! Dark guilds aren't something to be taken lightly - they don't play by the rules of magic. They don't care who they hurt.

And they hurt Lucy, and other Fairy Tail members.

They hurt the woman he loves and he wasn't there to do a damn thing about it.

A sharp hiss sounded in his ear and he was brought back to the world, only to find that he was digging his fingers into Lucy's hips in his anger. He quickly released her, moving his hands away as a curse fell from his lips.

"Sorry, I… I didn't mean to -"

"I know," Lucy said, finally pulling herself away. Natsu sat up with her and was able to observe her more closely.

She had a deep bruise beneath her left eye and a cut on her right cheek. Angry red marks crossed over her neck and down to her chest, as though she'd been scratched with dull claws and the welts hadn't quite healed yet. There were more scratches, cuts, and bruises on her arms and legs, and her body had its fair share of areas covered in dirt and dried blood.

But she was beautiful.

She was alive.

Lucy averted her brown eyes, her expression solemn.

"I… Natsu, we need to talk."

"Lucy -"

"No," she said, forcing herself to look at him. He saw pleading in those eyes and he couldn't protest even if he tried with all his might. "We need to."

Natsu nodded and helped her stand.

"We should let Wendy fix you up first, though," he said, but Lucy shook her head and led him out to the back of the guild hall. Once outside, she took a deep, shaky breath, wringing her hands in front of her and still avoiding his gaze. She was nervous, but she wouldn't let him say they could do this later. It needed to be done now, and Natsu would be lying if he said he could wait any longer.

She was right. They needed to talk, but that didn't mean he wanted her to push herself. He was still pissed about the mission.

"Natsu," Lucy said. Her voice was soft, and his ears barely registered the sound. He looked to her, but she was looking at his chest, too worried to face him completely. "I… I had no right to say to you what I did that day… I was awful. I was afraid, but that's no excuse. We were angry, and you told me how you felt, but I…" She shook her head. Her words were rushed and she switched topics between apologizing and talking about why they fought in a jumbled mess, as though she were trying to say everything on her mind at once.

"Lucy," Natsu said, hushing the blonde. She quieted, knowing she was only making more of a mess of things in her nervous haste. "You… You don't have to apologize for getting mad at me. I said some shitty things that day and you had every right to be angry. I was a complete jerk."

"Natsu, you told me you loved me, and I -"

"It wasn't a good time to say it. It was in the heat of the moment and it came out because I was angry and…" He shook his head. "I shouldn't have said it. Yeah, what you said afterwards sucked, and it only pissed me off more, but I still shouldn't have said it. You're right - I wanted this. I shouldn't expect anything more than what we agreed on."

"But you should!" Lucy shouted, tears pricking her eyes. She was frustrated at herself for not being able to say exactly what she wanted to - she didn't know what that was, but she just wanted to explain everything. She didn't have the words, and she wanted to slap herself. She was a writer, and she was being absolutely awful with words right now. "It's not uncommon for someone to fall in love in one of these relationships. There's always one fool who catches feelings."

"I… Lucy, I loved you before this happened. When we slept together those first couple of times, I took it as my chance to get closer to you, but instead I fucked everything up and ended up only pushing you away. I didn't think about what would happen in the end when I couldn't hold back my feelings anymore. I was the fool in the arrangement."

"No… I was," Lucy said, casting her gaze downward again. Natsu furrowed his brows at her, watching as she took another deep breath. "I always found you attractive and kinda liked you for a while, but it was during our… arrangement that I finally came to terms with my feelings. I think I began falling in love with you, and like you said, I was afraid. I was too scared. This was dangerous. I saw loving you as a danger and I needed to stop myself, but I couldn't."

"You… Loving me is dangerous?" His voice was raw and his chest hurt. He'd never meant to be the one to scare her with love.

Lucy looked up at him, brown eyes swimming with unshed tears.

"Natsu… without you, I'm nothing. No, please, don't say anything," Lucy said when Natsu opened his mouth. "Don't say it's not true, because it is. Had I never met you, I wouldn't be here - in Fairy Tail. I wouldn't have met all these amazing people. I wouldn't have all of the spirits that I have. I wouldn't have had all of the adventures or made all of my friends. I wouldn't be as strong as I am. Natsu, you're my best friend and you're the sole reason that I am standing here today as I am. The Lucy Heartfilia who is standing here right now is all in thanks to you, Natsu. And… and I'm terrified of losing you. You mean the world to me and if I lost you…" She choked, unable to say anything more. She didn't want to think about losing Natsu as a friend.

"Why would you lose me? Luce, I'm not going anywhere," Natsu said, taking a step forward and placing a hand on her arm. A shiver ran through her at the gentle touch.

"It's not about going anywhere, Natsu. If we… If we gave us a try, and it didn't work out, I could lose you as a friend. It's almost always super awkward between friends if they dated, then broke up. I'm too afraid of risking that." Lucy shook her head. "But I was stupid. This arrangement we had - I don't know what I was thinking. Why did I think it would work? If anything, our relationship as friends could have been far worse when this all ended. I wasn't thinking. But even after that, I…"

"I would never break your heart," Natsu said, and Lucy looked up at him with wide eyes. He was standing close, and her breath caught as those onyx eyes stared into her own with warmth.

He knew what she was trying to say - what she didn't know she wanted to say.

She was afraid of giving her heart to him, only to have it broken. She wanted to love him, but didn't want to lose his love and his friendship.

He knew, because he knew her.

"I would cherish you each and every day of our lives. Luce, there's no one else for me. You're the only one I've ever been this crazy about. You make me feel things that are so… weird. But a good weird. I love you, Lucy, and I would never stop being your friend. I won't let you get rid of me very easily. And don't give me all the credit for the person you've become. You did most of it yourself - ah, no, don't argue with me. And if you think our meeting has changed you, it has also certainly changed me. I'm more rational… er, slightly. I'm more aware of things and I… I'm just a better person." Her lower lip quivered. She wanted to smile. She wanted to cry.

She wanted… him.

"I'm so sorry, Natsu. I was stupid and afraid. I should have trusted you," she said shakily, tears falling down her cheeks as she wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face in his chest. She just wanted to hold him.

She missed him. She needed him. And above all, she loved him.

"It shouldn't have taken a dark guild nearly killing us for me to realize I loved you, Natsu… I'm so sorry," she whispered. Natsu knew they could apologize to each other all day, and it needed to end, even if he needed to say it again. Instead, he just pressed his lips to the top of her head.

"Come on, let's go back inside. Wendy needs to take a look at you."

After getting Lucy and the rest of the others as fixed up as they could be, as well as thanking Jellal and Meredy for their help before they went back to the rest of their guild, Natsu and Lucy made it back to her apartment.

Of course, that was after… everything. Once Lucy's major wounds were healed and was deemed well again, Natsu found himself unable to hold back. He'd kept eye contact with Lucy over Wendy's head and he finally snapped. He went forward and grabbed her, crashing his lips to hers in a kiss that Lucy eagerly responded to.

Wendy squeaked, others catcalled, but neither mage involved in the kiss cared. Especially Natsu. He fist his hand in her hair and kept her to him, tilting his head for a better angle. Perhaps he should slow things down. Perhaps he should have taken her to a more private area.

No. He needed her. Now. He needed to feel her lips on his, he needed to taste her.

Eventually he did break away and he looked down at her through lidded eyes.

"Shit, uh… You're probably tired after all the shit you've been through," he said, suddenly feeling awkward. He was worried he was moving too quickly (even though they had quite literally been fucking each other any chance they had for the past several months) and he wanted her to have the space she needed to recover from the mission.

Lucy nodded softly and stepped back, clearing her throat. The rest of the guild quickly turned their attention to other things as to not appear as though they were staring. The blonde turned to the door and took a deep breath, then turned back to Natsu with a warm smile that made Natsu's heart melt.

"Will you walk me home?"

The two had walked back to Lucy's apartment in relative silence, but the moment they reached the door they were all over each other. Neither had any intention of leaving it there.

They stumbled through the door, lips on lips, cheeks, jaws, necks - anywhere they could reach. They blindly stepped into her apartment, the both of them knowing the layout like the back of their hands and could avoid tripping over anything.

Natsu reached for a light he knew was on a nearby stand (he wanted to see all of her tonight), but his hand was met with air. He waved his hand around and leaned closer to the area.

Nothing.

"What happened to the lamp?"

"Broke," she said simply, undistracted from her own task at hand.

"It broke?"

"I threw it at the door after you left last month," she said, dragging her lips along his jaw. She had no intention of slowing down - she needed him desperately. However, Natsu stopped and lowered his head.

"Lucy… What I said that night -" Delicate fingers pressed against his lips and he met her warm, loving eyes.

"We both said things that night and we can't take it back. We were both angry and I was conflicted with my feelings. If anything, I should apologize to you. I was horrible. You… you told me you loved me and I…" She shook her head, casting her eyes downward. With a deep breath she looked up at him. "I can't say to just forget it. You're not the only one that wants to be forgiven. That whole time you obviously felt things for me and I was trying so hard to push you away but -"

"Luce, I will always forgive you. I get that you were scared. I was, too. We just… weren't on the same page. But fuck, I love you, Lucy, and I will for the rest of my life. That's all that I want to be important right now." Lucy's lower lip quivered and she placed her hands on either side of his face, unshed tears shimmering in her eyes.

"I love you, too, Natsu," she whispered, and crashed her lips to his. Natsu grunted and wrapped his arms around her waist, dragging her impossibly closer and they continued to stumble awkwardly into the apartment. However, Natsu swerved when they got close to the bed and she instead found herself being bent backwards over her table. Natsu's lips found her ear.

"I'm gonna fuck you on every surface of this apartment tonight, Luce. Better be prepared." Lucy bit her lip, shivering pleasurably.

"Better be able to keep that promise cause I'm holding you to it."

No sooner had the words left her lips that Natsu was tearing at her clothes, and she at his. His hand went between her legs but she pushed it away, instead using her own hand to toy at herself. Her eyes watched his face intently and took pleasure in the way his pupils blew wide, a groan falling from his mouth as he watched her nimble fingers spread herself and brush over her clit.

Eventually she removed her hand and used it to raise her top, quirking a brow as though to ask what he was waiting for.

"Fuck me already, Natsu," she purred, biting her lower lip. The dragon slayer groaned and was quick to please his woman, and himself. Fuck, he had missed her and he loved her and he needed her and - fuck.

And there they were. Together, completely.

Lucy's back arched and she threw her head back, reaching her arms out blindly to find him and wrapping her arms around his neck to bring him down to her, his lips finding hers in a desperate lock. She whimpered into his mouth with every deep, inward thrust he gave. She felt so alive and like she was free falling down a blissful void that she never wanted to end.

She was in love with this man and she knew she would be for the rest of her life. She was stupid for trying to push him away for so long - it was Natsu for crying out loud and she should know damn well by now that there was no getting rid of him.

They had gone about this all recklessly, but neither wanted it any other way.

"Oh my - FUCK! Yes!"

"Yeah? You like that? Don't close your eyes - look at that. Look at yourself, Luce. Fuck, look how you take my cock. So fucking deep," Natsu murmured in her ear. He stood before her full-length mirror she had purchased at some point in their relationship. Her feet weren't on the ground. Instead, he held her up by tucking an arm beneath each of her legs at the insides of her knees as he thrust up into her, his chest pressed firmly to her back.

Lucy could only respond to him with a guttural moan, but she brought one of her hands down her body and used it to spread herself open further for Natsu's eyes. She managed to drag her eyes up to meet his in the mirror but saw that he was zeroed in right where she wanted him. He growled and his thrusts became harder and more ragged and Lucy could hardly hold her head up any further as yet another orgasm wracked through her body. How many was that tonight? What round is this? Shit, she didn't know, and truthfully, she didn't care. She was exhausted but she didn't want him to stop.

Natsu's movements stuttered and hot breath blew over her neck with a heavy groan as he came, burying himself deep within her.

"Fuck, you're so gorgeous," he mumbled. "I love watching you cum on my cock. So fucking beautiful." Lucy hummed, smiling lazily as she felt herself go limp. Natsu pulled out of her and maneuvered her body to stand her on feet. She spun on her heels and looped her arms around his neck, reaching up to peck him on the lips.

"Mmm… quick nap, then we pick up where we left off?" she whispered. Natsu grinned.

"Sounds like a plan." He picked her up and carried her to the bed, lying her beneath the covers before crawling in after her. When she rolled and curled up to his side, Natsu swore he had died and gone to heaven.

"I love you," she said, kissing his jaw. That solidified it - he really must be dead. He released a heavy breath.

"I love you, too. Fuck, you don't know how great it is to hear you say that," he said, and she smiled, resting her head on his chest.

"I'll say it a thousand times more, but… can we sleep first?" Natsu couldn't help but laugh.

"Yeah, get your beauty rest. Mavis knows you need it," he teased, tickling at her side. Lucy giggled at the sensation but slapped his chest.

"Watch it, or you're sleeping on the floor." He just laughed and pulled her closer.

He really did love her, and he'd make sure she would never slip through his fingers again.

A/N: soooooo there it is! The final chapter! And might I just say... I am so sorry. Idk how many of you follow me on tumblr but I said there that I hadn't been writing because my motivation for the past several months were at a major low. I had many issues going on with random, intense leg pains. In the end (basically a month ago) we learned that I had a fractured vertebrae, spinal stenosis, and spondilolisthesis - something I would need back surgery to fix. I finally got it and am still recovering but I have been trying hard to get back into a writing mood, and I think I'm getting there. ANYWAY again, here it is! And again again, I am so sorry.

Also I was gonna end this at the 2nd to last page break but I realize I kinda didn't do much with sex and I was wanting mirror sex at 2 am, so I did it. Let me know what you think! I don't wanna get hopes up but there's a chance for a possible bonus chapter, but don't hold me to it! I can't promise when it will ever get done. I love you all so much and it really means the world to me that this story got so popular. I never would have expected this sort of turnout for one of my own fics and I can't explain how warmed my heart is. You have been there every step of the way for me and I am so very thankful. You are all so kind and I don't deserve all of this. Thank you, thank you, thank you all so much! I really hope I didn't disappoint you with this chapter. I'll probably post something for you all on tumblr about how amazed I am and I'm sure yall won't care cause it's not really much to you but I really mean it when I say I'm thankful for you all. It's been a wild ride and I am so happy to have gotten this chance to write for you all and to meet people out of it like I did. Anyway! I should stop before the author's note turns out longer than the chapter. My tumblr is Preussenlieds ("s" included) if you care to check that out at all!

Once again I love you all and thank you so, so, so much! You all mean the world to me!