this probably has a lot of typos since I didn't proofread but I've been itching to upload ever since I finished Rust and Stardust. I hope you enjoy this mil even one shot :)

this oneshot is based off of a post on instagram I saw made by castelbyers

Mike and Jane walked hand in hand up the walkway to the Hopper residence. As he did every time he approached the house he felt nervousness start to bubble up from the pit of his stomach. Despite how well he and Jane's father got along he was still incredibly intimidating. He was the chief of police and his girlfriend's father. Mike couldn't think of a more terrifying person. But with Jane's hand in his he felt a bit more at ease. She had an effect over him that no one else on earth had.

They both stopped when they reached the door and turned towards each other. Night had fallen over Hawkins over an hour ago. Jane looked down at her watch. Her curfew was 10:30 and it was only 10:26. They had four more minutes to themselves. And even though Hopper would be able to hear them from where he sat in the living room he would let them talk for those last four minutes. But if they went a minute too late the front door would swing open and he would force them to say goodnight.

With the only sources of light limited to street lamps and porch lights scattered across the streets hos eyes struggled to make out the details of her face. But after six months' worth of dates he had studies her face enough to know exactly how she looked even without the light. Her dark eyeshadow would be smudged and faded after a long day and her hair gel would have started to its strength. Though he wished there was enough light for him to see the curly flyways that broke free he was satisfied with just imagining them.

There were a million details to remember in their relationship and Mike tried his best to remember them all. The first was the day they met. She and her father had just moved down from Chicago so he could take the open position as police chief. Mike had been sitting in his eighth grade biology class, fully anticipating an excruciatingly normal day, when the classroom door swung open. In 1984 bright colors were more in style than ever. The only people who owned black were punk rockers and delinquents. At the sight of the new girl, dressed in a black T shirt, black converse, and dark eyeshadow, Mike was confident that she wasn't someone he would want to get to know. He had been miserably wrong.

He remembered their first date. It wasn't a date at first since Will and Max were seeing the movie with them. But when their friends snuck off to go to the bathroom in the first half hour and never came back he had a feeling he knew why they had been acting so weird. His and Jane's arms brushed against one another for the remaining hour and a half. When the movie finally ended neither of them made any move to get up. It didn't take long for the theatre to empty. They were alone. His heart started pounding in his chest and his hands felt sweaty. All of the other times they'd been alone and he hadn't done anything, leaving him wondering 'what if', ran through his head. Before he could talk himself out of it he kissed her. And she kissed him back.

"That restaurant is so good." Jane said as they stood on her front porch. "We should go back soon."

"Yeah." He agreed.

The same way they had when he kissed her for the first time his hands felt clammy and his heart was running a marathon. A thought had been nagging at him for a little over a week. A thought that got more and more difficult to ignore when he was around Jane. She smiled at him bright enough to light up the whole street in contrast to the dark clothes and make up she wore. Under her cold and black exterior she was one of the kindest people he knew. She was constantly putting others needs ahead of her own, even when Mike desperately tried to convince her that Troy's bullying didn't bother him. She loved and cared for others in a way she couldn't do for herself.

Her thin eyebrows came together in the middle of her forehead. "What's wrong?" she asked. How she was able to read him as easily as a book was something he'd still yet to figure out.

"It's nothing." He told her

Jane's expression hardened slightly. "Mike." She said. A one word warning to tell her the truth quickly before she weaseled it out of him.

He sighed, admitting defeat. "I think…" Mike began, but the words got caught in his throat. They fought desperately to stay inside where they were safe and shielded from rejection. But the look on her face tugged them closer and closer to the surface until they came tumbling out of his mouth. "I'm falling in love with you."

The silence that followed his admission was deafening. It would have been quieter if they both started screaming at the top of their lungs. Jane stared at him. And while her expression didn't change there was something different about her. Something he wished he knew the words for. Mike waited and waited for a response but she was silent. The longer she said nothing the more he just wanted to get her reaction over with. He was beginning to anticipate a negative reaction more than a positive one.

"Now would be the time to say something." He told her. His voice came out weak and shaky sounding and immediately made him want to clear his throat.

Even through the darkness he could see her swallowing hard. The porch light next door was bright enough to cast a reflection in her brown eyes. Jane as an expert on reading him. But when he roles were reversed he felt as if he was taking a stab in the dark. Literally.

Her gaze cast downward to look at their feet. His converse sneakers and her doc marten boots. They were opposites in every single way. She just barely got away without detentions because of her father's status while he was on the fast track to being the top in their class. He was the sun and she was the moon. She brought out a more rebellious side of him and he brought out a part of her Hopper once told him he hadn't seen since she hit puberty. They were either doomed to fail or meant to be. Mike had always thought the latter.

"I told you not to fall in love with me." She whispered. Her voice was barely audible and he almost missed it.

Mike remembered the night she was referring to. They'd been dating for a little more than three months and had gone to see the movie Heathers with their friends. Afterwards they went out to lunch at a nearby diner and discussed their favorite and least favorite things about the movie. Jane had been silent for most of the conversation, chewing slowly on the fries and sipping on her soda. One of the few comments she made, as they talked about how quickly chaos took over the characters, was "that's what happens when you fall in love".

While he drove her home Mike debated the best way to go about bringing up what she had said. He knew her family history. After her father caught her mother cheating she left and he had a dangerous bought of alcoholism. It took nearly a year and a half for him to get sober, the last straw being when a nine year old Jane got into his whisky. It was one of the many reasons she was a pessimist. But he had thought that after a relationship as smooth sailing as the one she had with him that she might change her mind.

"What you said before, about falling in love, do you really think that?" Mike finally asked when he pulled onto her street.

Jane looked over at him. She hadn't had enough time to do her make up that morning and left the house barefaced. The days she was 100% natural were his favorite days. Though he liked the way she looked with dark eyeshadow, and that it made his old bullies afraid to go near him when she was around, he loved the uninterrupted view of her flawless face. She stared at him for a moment before she spoke. "Mike, I like what we have, and I like you, but you have to promise me something."

"Anything."

"Promise you won't fall in love with me."

"Okay not anything."

Jane groaned and looked back out the window next to her. "Mike." She began. But she never continued whatever thought was stuck in her mind.

"I can't control something like that." He told her. "The way you feel about someone just happens. I can't do anything about it."

"Then promise me you'll try."

He did.

And he failed.

Now, standing on Jane's porch and feeling his heart slowly crack into little pieces, his hope that she would maybe give up on her negative views on love were proven wrong in an instant. He didn't expect her to love him, it felt too much to ask for her to even like him, but he had hoped that she would at least think differently. Jane looked back up at him and her face softened. Mike realized that he must have looked as hurt as he felt, which was embarrassing. "I'm sorry." She said, reaching for his hands. His mind told him to pull away but his body begged for her comforting touch. "I'm sorry, Mike."

I'm sorry.

They were words she said often. One of the few flaws of Jane Hopper was her guilt and the way she blamed herself for everything. For her parents divorced, for the one time Mike got detention, the C he got on a test the day after they stayed out late. I'm sorry were words that came out of her mouth as easily as an exhaled breath.

"I told you I couldn't help it." He said. "You're the most amazing person I know, how could I not?"

Jane shook her head. "Please stop." She begged him. She sounded on the verge of tears and his heart, or what remained of it, twisted into a knot.

But he couldn't stop. "What are you so scared of?" he asked her. It was a question that had been on his mind for some time. "Do you think that I'm going to hurt you?"

"No, it's not that- "

"Then what is it?"

Jane shut her eyes tightly and squeezed his hands. "I'm scared I'm going to hurt you." She said. Her words felt as heavy as the worry that had likely been weighing her down since the possibility entered her mind. "You're too good for me, Mike."

"That's not true."

"Yes, it is, and you know it." Her guilt was typically partnered with her low self esteem. A duo that had caused a few similar conversations in the past. Mike always seemed to be able to sooth her worries that she didn't deserve him. But he'd never seen the look she was wearing before. "I don't think I could forgive myself if I ever hurt you."

"Jane, stop." He said. Mike glanced down at his watch then into the window. 10:32. While there wasn't a doubt in his mind that her father was waiting behind the front door for the conversation to change so he could cut them off he wasn't bothered. He needed to talk some sense into her. "You know how happy you make me. Why can't you just let yourself be happy too?"

One of her hands slipped out of his grasp and quickly wiped away a tear before it could escape from her eye. "I am happy." She told him. "You make me the happiest person in the world. And it's terrifying."

Mike's body hurt to see her so upset. He had heard it said, by someone somewhere, that no one cries over something they didn't care about. She cared about him. He knew it, and she didn't need to say it, but he was glad she did anyway. "You don't have to say anything. But I needed to tell you."

He saw her bottom lip start to tremble before she took a step towards him and wrapped her arms around her neck. Though she was silent her body shook with tears that struggled to stay internalized. "I'm sorry, Mike." She said once more. "I know I'm not easy to deal with."

"Stop it." He warned. He knew how she hated it when he droned on about how amazing she was. Mike had a strong feeling it was because she never believed him.

She pressed her forehead against his neck. "Just… give me some time?"

"As much time as you need."

"You're the best thing that ever happened to me."

Her words came out the same way his had when he made his admission only a few minutes earlier. So sure, yet so unsure. Vulnerable and exposed but confident. It was her equivalent and he would take it in a heartbeat.

Jane pulled away and looked down at her watch before her eyes met his again. They were watery and irritated but beautiful none the less. He wiped the wetness off her cheeks with his thumbs. She smiled weakly at him. "I'll see you tomorrow?" she asked

"Of course." He told her. His hands lingered on her cheeks for another moment before falling back down to his sides. "Do you want me to pick you up in the morning?" She nodded a few times which was answer enough for him. "See you in nine hours."

"Nine hours." She repeated.

Jane kissed him, quickly and likely just as aware of her father's presence as he was, before taking a deep breath. She turned away from him and disappeared behind her front door. As he walked back to his car Mike could feel the pieces of his heart mending back together. For a moment he had thought he lost her. But she was still his Jane. Even if, god forbid, things between them ended she would still be his Jane.

He practically collapsed into the driver's seat. Before pulling away from her house he glanced at the clock on the dashboard.

10:35.