Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own anything even remotely associated with Final Fantasy VII. I may have kidnapped Vincent for this story, but he's not mine to keep. All characters not in the game are mine, so if anybody else wants to use 'em (god only knows why) they gotta ask me first. Thanks. Now, read.
* * *
An Author's Abject Apology
by thelittletree, with a little help from the inestimable Mr. Vincent Valentine
* * *
"You want me to do what again?"
Little Tree put a hand on her hip and sighed, twisting a stray piece of nondescript brown hair between her fingers for a moment before putting it into her mouth. "Please? They'll get mad at me, but they all *love* you!"
Vincent sighed and stared a moment at the piece of paper he held before giving a hard exhale. "All right. But I want you to keep your promise."
Little Tree smiled a little, knowing she had won. "Of course."
He glanced to his right before finally taking the necessary steps out onto the stage. The chairs on the floor in front of him were all empty, but Little Tree had told him his audience was an invisible one on something called the 'Internet'. Whatever that was. Quietly, he cleared his throat and looked down at the page. "Addressing all readers of 'Does Fate Allow a Second Chance?': Little Tree regrets to announce that she..." He squinted and then shook his head.
Little Tree peeked out from around the curtain. "What's wrong?"
He blinked and held the paper a little closer to his face. "I can't read your writing."
She gave a scoff and stomped onto the stage beside him. "Gimme that!" She plucked the page out of his hand and tried to find the ostensibly scribbled word. "That one?" She pointed it out. "You can't read that?"
He crossed his arms over his chest. "What does it say?"
Little Tree looked back at the word. "Will."
"Will?"
"Doesn't it look like 'will'?"
"No."
She sighed again and, handing him the paper, snapped her fingers. "There. Type-written. Better?"
He frowned in confusion at the page. "How did you do that?"
"I'm the writer, remember? I thought we went over this. I can do anything I want."
He raised an eyebrow at her and she lifted her hand, ready to snap again. "Proof?" She clicked her fingers together and suddenly Elira was standing there beside her, one hand out as if she'd been about to grab something. And then she started and looked around. "What...? Where am I?" She glanced to her right and blinked. "Vincent?"
Page forgotten, Vincent walked up to stand beside Elira, reaching out a comforting, protective hand to her shoulder, and then he glared at Little Tree. "Why did you do that?"
"To show you I could. Hello, Elira."
Elira was staring out at the empty chairs, but she turned back suddenly as she was addressed. "How did I get here? Who are you?"
Little Tree smirked. "Ever the curious one. I'm Little Tree, the author of the fic you were just in. The apartment I just pulled you out of? That's part of the story."
"I...I don't understand."
"That's all right, you don't have to. Back you go!" She snapped her fingers and Elira vanished from the stage. Vincent started a little and then opened his mouth as if to speak.
"She's all right," Little Tree assured him hastily. "Right back where you left her, and probably scrounging for ice cream and pickles."
Vincent frowned. "Ice cream and...pickles?"
"You'll understand later. It's what comes from not using protection."
"Protection against what?"
Little Tree smiled mysteriously. "You'll understand later, I said. Geez. Now, read. Everyone's waiting."
Vincent seemed ready to demand that she stop being so cryptic, but then he shook his head in resignation and faced out from the stage again. "All right. Little Tree regrets to announce that she will not be writing an epilogue to her story due to the fact that she feels saying anything else would be superfluous. The story is complete, and, though she tried to keep writing, her muse wouldn't cooperate. So, no epilogue. She sends an apology to everyone who was expecting one and hopes they can find it in their hearts to forgive her."
Little Tree glanced at him from where she'd been standing with her head cocked, listening. "Is that all of it?"
"Yes, every letter, space, and period." He handed the paper back and looked at her expectantly.
"Oh, all right." She snapped her fingers again and suddenly he was holding the Death Penalty in his hands. Quickly, he ran his palm over it as if to check for damage, and then raised it on his arm to aim at a chair on the floor.
Little Tree cringed, realizing what he was about to do. "No!"
But it was too late. He'd already pulled the trigger and the chair exploded in a shower of stuffing. Little Tree watched with straining forbearance as pieces floated to the floor. And then she scowled at her favourite Final Fantasy VII character, trying to stay mad as he twitched his lips in his almost-smile. "Vincent," she chided. "Have a little respect for other people's property, would you?"
"Of course."
* * *
Kay, maybe I'll stop drinking coffee on an empty stomach :P
Sorry everybody! No epilogue! I tried, I really did, but nothing was right! So...you can guess what happens next, right? They go back to Neo-Midgar and live their lives as happily as anyone can. The End! Thanks so much to all of you! You were so encouraging, and getting up every morning after posting to check my email for reviews was something I seriously looked forward to! I'm going to miss it! Thanks again so very much for reading my little fic!
PS/ I'm a terrible perfectionist. I've already started editing the chapters, so I'm gonna be reposting them. Same story, tiny adjustments. Thank you.
* * *
An Author's Abject Apology
by thelittletree, with a little help from the inestimable Mr. Vincent Valentine
* * *
"You want me to do what again?"
Little Tree put a hand on her hip and sighed, twisting a stray piece of nondescript brown hair between her fingers for a moment before putting it into her mouth. "Please? They'll get mad at me, but they all *love* you!"
Vincent sighed and stared a moment at the piece of paper he held before giving a hard exhale. "All right. But I want you to keep your promise."
Little Tree smiled a little, knowing she had won. "Of course."
He glanced to his right before finally taking the necessary steps out onto the stage. The chairs on the floor in front of him were all empty, but Little Tree had told him his audience was an invisible one on something called the 'Internet'. Whatever that was. Quietly, he cleared his throat and looked down at the page. "Addressing all readers of 'Does Fate Allow a Second Chance?': Little Tree regrets to announce that she..." He squinted and then shook his head.
Little Tree peeked out from around the curtain. "What's wrong?"
He blinked and held the paper a little closer to his face. "I can't read your writing."
She gave a scoff and stomped onto the stage beside him. "Gimme that!" She plucked the page out of his hand and tried to find the ostensibly scribbled word. "That one?" She pointed it out. "You can't read that?"
He crossed his arms over his chest. "What does it say?"
Little Tree looked back at the word. "Will."
"Will?"
"Doesn't it look like 'will'?"
"No."
She sighed again and, handing him the paper, snapped her fingers. "There. Type-written. Better?"
He frowned in confusion at the page. "How did you do that?"
"I'm the writer, remember? I thought we went over this. I can do anything I want."
He raised an eyebrow at her and she lifted her hand, ready to snap again. "Proof?" She clicked her fingers together and suddenly Elira was standing there beside her, one hand out as if she'd been about to grab something. And then she started and looked around. "What...? Where am I?" She glanced to her right and blinked. "Vincent?"
Page forgotten, Vincent walked up to stand beside Elira, reaching out a comforting, protective hand to her shoulder, and then he glared at Little Tree. "Why did you do that?"
"To show you I could. Hello, Elira."
Elira was staring out at the empty chairs, but she turned back suddenly as she was addressed. "How did I get here? Who are you?"
Little Tree smirked. "Ever the curious one. I'm Little Tree, the author of the fic you were just in. The apartment I just pulled you out of? That's part of the story."
"I...I don't understand."
"That's all right, you don't have to. Back you go!" She snapped her fingers and Elira vanished from the stage. Vincent started a little and then opened his mouth as if to speak.
"She's all right," Little Tree assured him hastily. "Right back where you left her, and probably scrounging for ice cream and pickles."
Vincent frowned. "Ice cream and...pickles?"
"You'll understand later. It's what comes from not using protection."
"Protection against what?"
Little Tree smiled mysteriously. "You'll understand later, I said. Geez. Now, read. Everyone's waiting."
Vincent seemed ready to demand that she stop being so cryptic, but then he shook his head in resignation and faced out from the stage again. "All right. Little Tree regrets to announce that she will not be writing an epilogue to her story due to the fact that she feels saying anything else would be superfluous. The story is complete, and, though she tried to keep writing, her muse wouldn't cooperate. So, no epilogue. She sends an apology to everyone who was expecting one and hopes they can find it in their hearts to forgive her."
Little Tree glanced at him from where she'd been standing with her head cocked, listening. "Is that all of it?"
"Yes, every letter, space, and period." He handed the paper back and looked at her expectantly.
"Oh, all right." She snapped her fingers again and suddenly he was holding the Death Penalty in his hands. Quickly, he ran his palm over it as if to check for damage, and then raised it on his arm to aim at a chair on the floor.
Little Tree cringed, realizing what he was about to do. "No!"
But it was too late. He'd already pulled the trigger and the chair exploded in a shower of stuffing. Little Tree watched with straining forbearance as pieces floated to the floor. And then she scowled at her favourite Final Fantasy VII character, trying to stay mad as he twitched his lips in his almost-smile. "Vincent," she chided. "Have a little respect for other people's property, would you?"
"Of course."
* * *
Kay, maybe I'll stop drinking coffee on an empty stomach :P
Sorry everybody! No epilogue! I tried, I really did, but nothing was right! So...you can guess what happens next, right? They go back to Neo-Midgar and live their lives as happily as anyone can. The End! Thanks so much to all of you! You were so encouraging, and getting up every morning after posting to check my email for reviews was something I seriously looked forward to! I'm going to miss it! Thanks again so very much for reading my little fic!
PS/ I'm a terrible perfectionist. I've already started editing the chapters, so I'm gonna be reposting them. Same story, tiny adjustments. Thank you.