The whole naming convention of regarding stories is a talent I will never learn. I mean, how do you name a story? How do you?

Anyway, this is just an idea I got some time ago. What would happen if Roger hadn't died and Rouge had been alive to raise their son - together, as a family? On Mt. Colbo. With Dadan and the bandits. That would be great, wouldn't it?

And I know I tagged Luffy in this, but that is because he will be an important figure in the story, but not until much later. I hope you understand why and won't be too bothered by his absence for a while.

Disclaimer_ I don't own One Piece, it all belong to Eiichiro Oda - may he never suffer writers/art block!

'Dadan stared wide eyed at the couple in front of her. The woman she'd never seen before, she was sure she would have remembered a pretty little thing such as her, especially one with that odd shade of strawberry blonde hair and the freckles that covered her tan skin. The man, however… Now that was a face anyone in the world would recognize. The curled black mustache with that huge grin that was presented on his wanted poster, the unruly black hair that looked dry as straw. This was the alleged Pirate King, Gold Roger at her doorstep with some random woman holding a baby and Marine vice-admiral Monkey D. Garp at his side while he was waving at her as if they were old acquaintances.

"Thank you for taking care of us," the Pirate King said, tilting his head to the side.

"Wha- wha- WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!" Dadan exclaimed. Was this a prank? Was she being pranked?

But no, apparently it was the real deal and Garp, for whatever unfathomable reason, was actually a crucial part in helping to hide the two away from the world. The very same Pirate King that the world believed dead was very much standing at her very doorstep very much alive. The only reason for this it turned out was the baby in the woman's arms, a small dark haired thing in a blue jumper who was snuggled up against her chest and sleeping soundly.

She froze. "Who's baby is that?"

Now, Dadan may not be the smartest woman in the world and may not have finished school, but she wasn't stupid. Instead of scholarly knowledge she had street smarts; And she doubted that anyone would need much smarts to figure out the situation standing before her. The dots were connecting in her brain, as the threads were weaved together to form a clear picture of a very illegal family. The only thing that stood out was Garp.

"That's my son, of course," the Pirate King beamed proudly, chest jutting out, shoulders raised and hands on his hips. His grin was like a flashlight, bright and happy.

"Dadan, you're going to be hiding them," Garp said, not even bothering to stay as he said it. Only shouting behind him, "Don't get in any trouble! Or the kid will be in danger."

"Yeah, yeah!" Roger laughed after him.

"I'll keep him out of trouble," the woman reassured, casting a side eye glance at Roger with a smile.

And that was how Dadan ended up with the Gol D. family living underneath her roof.

"You'll be sleeping here," Dadan said, showing them to one of the upper rooms. It was already crowded, but none of the Dadan bandits wanted to piss off Roger or the woman, whose name turned out to be Rouge, in fear for their lives.

She'd had some of the bandits clean one of the storage rooms and pull in three mattresses. It was as luxurious as they could make it. They may be bandits but they weren't rich; And considering the size of the Dadan family and the size of the hut-like house they shared not everyone were given a mattress to sleep on. Most of the time they just slept atop of each other in a huge pile with the only exception being Dadan herself.

"All to ourselves?" Roger asked, looking around. Dadan blinked, confused.

"Well, best for the baby…?" she muttered, a nervous laugh followed. "I figured you wanted privacy?"

"Nah, no need for that," Roger said. "I used to sleep with the crew all the time."

Rouge rolled her eyes at him, but turned to Dadan with a smile. "This'll be great, it's very much appreciated. Though we do need a crib."

"We are short on… cribs at the moment," Dogra said from beside Dadan.

Roger made a quick scan of the room. There were a few crates stacked near the far corner of the room - there had only been so much they could move from the room without running out of space to put it. He walked over to one and pried the lid off as if it had been made out of paper. He scanned the inside and dumped a whole bunch of wool on the floor. He then started refilling the box with care, padding the sides, making sure the bottom was properly cushioned. When he was done he stood up and dropped the crate at their feet.

"There," he said, grinning like a mad man. "A baby crib…" At Rouge's raised eyebrow, he added, "... Sort of."

"You're going to have the kid sleep in a box?" Dadan asked.

"Till we get a proper one."

Dadan had no response to that and could only nod dumbfounded. Her entire view of Roger, a man who had held, still held, the title of the Marines Most Wanted, the Pirate King, feared and dangerous, had been shattered in the span of ten minutes. She had expected a dark, maybe a little brody, definitely hard cut and easily angered, a man the bandits would have to walk on eggshells around for many years to come. Instead here stood a man whom she couldn't quite find the right words to describe.

"Make yourselves at home," Dadan said, slowly backing out of the room. Dogra following her.

"Boss, is that…?" one of the bandits asked as they were gathered in the main room. It was well passed dark and Dadan had made sure to wait till she was certain that their new living companions were asleep to have the meeting.

It was heavy in the air and the bandits were sitting with tense shoulders, everyone listening for any sound that may come from upstairs. So far all they'd heard was snoring, very loud snoring. But that didn't ease the minds of the bandits. They were just meters away from one of the world's most wanted men along with said man's wife and child. A very, very illegal child.

"What's gonna happen now?"

"What if the marines find out?"

"We'll be dead for sure!"

"Oh my god! We're going to die!"

"QUIET!" Dadan barked. The entire room froze so fast and got so silent that it might as well have been empty. They weren't even breathing until they heard the rhythmic sound of, most likely Roger's, snoring; And everyone let out a sigh of relief. "Quiet…" Dadan said again in a hushed whisper.

The bandits had a point. They were currently in the worst position possible. If they were found out, they would all be executed for not only helping the Pirate King but also for hiding him. Staying low had suddenly become a so much higher priority than ever before. But they had one thing working for them.

Monkey D. Garp. The vise admiral himself.

It had been Garp who had dumped the family on them, which would definitely be against his marine code. That meant that he was their safest link while also being the most risky. Why Garp decided to hide Roger and his family was beyond anyone's understanding. The baby was definitely a factor, but helping a baby and helping Roger was very different and definitely held very different risks.

It was a tricky situation for sure. But right now there was nothing they could do to get out of it.

"We'll have to make it work," she finally said.

Just as those words left her mouth a loud baby wail came from upstairs: And it dawned on the bandits that this was their life now.

This will mostly be a slice of life sort of thing with cronological chapters. So we're starting from the very beginning. I will not miss any of the opportunities that this would hold. Just imagine the scenarios that could happen! There is so much potential. It's just hilarious to think of how the bandits would react to not only housing the Pirate King's son, but him and his baby mama, too! I will have too much fun with this.