"If you live long enough, you see the same eyes in different people."

"Errrmph"

An indiscernible groan escaped Rey as she shifted onto her side, slowly rousing from her deep sleep. Her eyes remained shut – she only wanted a few more minutes. It had been such a good rest. Anticipating the cool surface of the Falcon's metal interior, she repositioned her elbows cautiously on the small cot.

Except, the wall never came.

Disoriented, Rey's eyes fluttered open and were met with a sight that for a moment briefly took her off guard. There was no metal wall with rusty edges or exposed wires, instead, a tall window with its thin drapes blowing across the marble floor from the breeze outside. She was also most certainly not on a cot and still had plenty of room before she would have been in any danger of slipping off.

Naboo. Right.

It was still dark outside. Rey reached for her comlink sitting on the end table to confirm the hour: it was still some time before dawn. As she set it back down she noticed a small tray of fruit and cheese set beside a glass of juice.

Leia.

She must have slept straight through the festivities last night. No bother. Rey was certain she would have been a bit of a killjoy anyway.

Since there was no going back to sleep at this point, she decided to explore. Rey threw the blankets back and was instantly chilled by the dewy air. A product of a dry climate, Rey was not accustomed to the excess moisture that formed a thin film on her skin, catching every breeze passing through the open window.

Rey wrapped her hands over her arms, rubbing warmth into them while she took a glance around the moonlit room. Her traveling clothes and cowl were nowhere to be seen, leaving Rey to assume that Leia was continuing her already too kind extension of hospitality by having them laundered. She investigated the leather trunk at the foot of the bed where Leia had pulled the nightdress from hours before and uncovered an even more lavish sleep robe. It was a deep maroon silk with soft velvet lining on the inside, its smooth texture entirely foreign between Rey's calloused fingers.

Her mind abruptly flashed back to those hot afternoons on Jakku. A growling stomach and an aching arm as she tirelessly attempted to give her newest find an enticing shine. Some days, a shine could make the difference between a quarter and a half-portion. In the distance, wealthy men and women in their silks and high fashion walking across the outpost, their expressions aghast and offended by the conditions they were witnessing. The humanitarian efforts and donations that followed would have all the best intentions, but no one other than Unkar Plutt would ever see those Republic credits. If there was a crack in the galaxy large enough for a planet, Jakku had already fallen through it.

Rey hastily slipped the robe over her nightdress and retrieved her fabric boots from where she had kicked them off underneath the bed. She silently hoped to herself that no one would be awake to witness such an odd ensemble.

Despite the dim lighting, she found it rather easy to retrace her steps to the foyer that she and Leia initially entered. This brought her to the main living space where Rey, half surprisingly, did not run into anyone. The rest of the Resistance was undoubtedly enjoying their comfortable arrangements for the evening. It would be back to bunks and rations soon enough, Rey mused.

The next room was a circle shaped entertaining area, lit dully by candles from the festivities earlier in the evening. At its center, abandoned glasses and bottles were scattered on top of a formal dining table. They did have some fun, didn't they?

Warm light flickering from the adjoining room drew Rey away from the remnants of last night's merrymaking and into an intimate common space. A fireplace at the end of the room was warm and inviting, its crackling and snapping of wood providing a rather comfortable ambience. Burning wood for pleasure was initially a bit of a foreign concept to Rey, but she was beginning to see the appeal.

"I can't, we can't."

Rey whirled around.

"Hello?" No one answered.

Her eyes rapidly searched for the source of the hushed whisper. Two couches, plush and deep red, remained unoccupied. The flames smoldered behind her as shadows danced ominously against the walls.

Her blood ran cold.

There was no one but her in this room. Her fingers searched for her saber at her waist although she was well aware she would not find anything- a phantom limb, of sorts.

"It's just not possible." There it was again. Rey's ears perked up. It was a woman's voice, but she sounded far from threatening. Just pained. Rey steadied her heart rate with a few deep breaths before drawing an unusual conclusion. What if this woman wasn't here? At least, not presently.

Rey felt foolish but slowly raised her hand out in front of her. "What are you trying to show me this time?" She whispered to no one in particular. In their brief time together, Luke never covered if the Force ever answered back. Her eyes closed, she exhaled, and reached out.

Echoes of the past swirled around Rey all at once. She was unable to discern the time or place but grasped onto fragments as they rushed by.

"Not a moment has gone by that I haven't thought of you. And now that I'm with you again, I'm in agony. The closer I get to you, the worse it gets. The thought of not being with you, I can't breathe." It was a voice of a young man that Rey did not know.

"You are in my very soul. Tormenting me." Anguish.

"What can I do? I will do anything that you ask." Though Rey could not distinguish who this young man was, his longing and agony was all too familiar.

"If you're suffering as much as I am, please, tell me."

Rey desperately listened for the young woman's answer. Her fingers twitched as she reached out towards the phantoms of the past. She needed to know. What became of them?

Just as swiftly as they appeared, the echoes halted and Rey was left in silence.

However, this silence was different. The quiet of the midnight hour had been replaced with a low vibration that caused Rey's ears to ring. The fireplace's soothing crackling behind her seemed distant now.

Her breath hitched in her chest. The skin on her arms prickled in anticipation. She did not need to hear the faint beeping noises of cold machinery to know who stood behind her.

The silence hung. Without turning around, Rey opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted.

"I thought we were done with this." His tone was dismissive as if he was being inconvenienced.

With this? His indifference enraged her and the floodgates opened before she could compose herself. Her memories of the bloodshed on Crait, all the destruction, her friends' ships hunted one by one, like animals. Master Luke Skywalker was dead and the Resistance was now but a handful of survivors. She felt as her anger pulsed through her body, tingling at the fingertips. He was lucky he wasn't there, not physically anyway. Gritting her teeth, she spun around to face him but she what she was met with stopped her in her tracks.

The newly crowned Supreme Leader of the First Order stood before her. His tall, broad black silhouette was just as menacing as she had remembered, especially now as it stood against the flames. Except his stance was not proud. Shoulders hunched, head down: it was the build of a broken man.

His gaze broke from what he was previously studying to meet hers. Her breath caught in her throat. His dark eyes were blank, lifeless. If it were at all possible, the purple hue under his eyes that had formed each passing day since their encounter on Starkiller Base had grown even more distinct.

He was in agony.

A wave of emotions washed over Rey, causing her to almost stagger from their weight. Cold. Emptiness. Longing. Somehow these private thoughts were shared with her without a single spoken word, a connection she had not experienced since their intimate exchange on Ahch-To. A perverse idea that if the Resistance successfully fell, she would go to him.

That's not how this works. Rey withheld a response, but she was not sure she needed to.

If he felt her aggression and disproving, he did not let on. His eyes briefly left her face for a quick once over of her apparel, quite the contrast from her usual functional beige and blue. Rey was not sure if it was a trick of the flickering light, but she could have sworn a slight smirk tugged at the corner of his lips. "It's a good look."

Heat rose to her face as she uneasily wrapped her arms around her torso, hoping he did not note the fine Naboo material. Despite how covered she was, she felt naked.

She ignored him. "How is this still happening?"

"It appears that Snoke's claim to our connection may have been more or less a fabrication." He response was matter of fact, delivered in an almost lazy drawl. "This does not surprise me. He was always one to take credit of other's strengths."

What was the significance of their bond then? Rey unconsciously rubbed the palm of her hand with her left thumb, recalling back their last intimate meeting by the light of a fire. At her lowest, she reached out to him. In her despair and loneliness, she exposed her soul. He listened attentively, reserved judgment. He of all people knew her heartache. Rey noticed that his hands were covered by his usual black leather gloves. She craved for them to be bare.

She had felt the light in him, she was confident in that. Master Luke had warned her that this was not going to go the way she thought and he was right. Her thoughts traveled to twirling of red and blue, two bodies moving in sync effortlessly as if in a dance, electricity in the air as falling embers rained down, and the charred remains of a dark enemy.

Rey did not think even the great Jedi Master could have predicted what happened in the throne room of the Supremacy.

"Why, Ben?" Rey asked, her voice raw. She wasn't even sure if that was his name anymore. It felt heavy, false on her tongue, but she insisted. "Why did you have to go this way?"

"I thought you understood."

"No." She swallowed, tears threatening to fall. "You keep running to the dark."

"Don't be naïve. The light, the dark. No one owns it. For thousands of years the galaxy's inhabitants have battled, and in their suppression of understanding the opposing side, they fall and the other rises. The Jedi Order, the Rebellion, the Empire, and the Sith. The Force always finds a way to balance the universe." His tone grew more assertive, but remained even. "We have been arrogant to believe we understand its intentions. We were arrogant enough to think we can control it."

Rey reflected back to the First Jedi temple and the ancient mosaic central to its main corridor. The caretakers of the island believed it to be an illustration of the Prime Jedi, the original of the Order, in a state of meditation and balance. She contemplated the memory of its white and black stone pieces, shimmering underneath the shallow pool of water. Master Luke had said the Jedi were responsible for their own downfall. Was it not as simple as she had been led to believe? Have the wars over good and evil been misguided?

"We are beyond this narrative, Rey. You and I. " The use of her name, soft as it rolled naturally off his lips, unnerved her more than she cared to admit. "We are above politics."

"You say that, but it's already too late." She spat. She relished the hint of bewilderment that briefly crossed his features. "You've inserted yourself far too deep for it to not be politics, Supreme Leader."

Quick anger flashed in his eyes. That hurt and it pleased her. "I took the throne in defense. It was either conquer or be conquered. For too long I have been used for my power." He hissed, taking a step towards her while his eyes searched her face. Rey held her stance. "Why would I run away with you, into the arms of the Resistance, an institution just as ignorant as its predecessors?" His inflection turned into a confident sneer. "They're just using you too. You're just too foolish to see it."

Now it was her turn to be angry. "They are brave people, brave people who believe in a cause greater than themselves. They will fight alongside each other, even if they won't live to see it – all while you sit alone on a throne."

In her outrage, Rey's guard crumbled and he seized the opportunity to slide in with ease. "Ah, so I see you've met the Resistance pilot." He mocked, silkily. "The best pilot in the entire galaxy. I too have had the pleasure." Despite his best efforts to mask it, Rey sensed the tinge of jealousy that lurked in his voice. They were far too connected to hide anything from the other now.

"He's brave."

The new Supreme Leader leaned back to laugh, a sound from him that was foreign to Rey's ears. It was hollow and lacked sincerity.

"He's reckless. Countless lives have been lost at his hands due to his rash decisions." He taunted. "But I maybe that only matters depending on what side you're on, what flag you fight under."

She didn't have a response for this harsh truth. He continued.

"Let me ask you, Rey, since you are now such a great lover of the Republic." The word fell from his mouth as if it were sour moof milk. "What have they ever done for you? As an abandoned child, living off scraps in the desert wasteland of Jakku…"

"Please, stop..." She pleaded, her eyes focused on her hands that had formed into tight fists.

"Just an Outer Rim planet. To the Republic? A lost cause." He pressed on. "Why, a junk planet doesn't produce any revenue. Where would be the investment? No fleet, no resources. Forgotten, left to fend on its own."

Rey was silent. Sensing her increasing discomfort, he swiftly backed down. The line had been crossed. He had proved his point.

His voice grew soft. "I don't understand why you fail to see what we can bring to the galaxy. We could build a galaxy with no hungry children. Think of what we could do, together."

Of course, Rey mused. Evil men never saw themselves as evil. They always had a reason, always had a justification for their actions.

It made them all the more terrifying.

"This is strange." Rey started, hoping he didn't hear how her voice wavered. "The great Supreme Leader of the First Order, begging for the assistance of a nobody." She raised her eyes to meet his, overlooking the desperation that reflected in the firelight. "How very charitable for you to stoop so low."

"That's not what I had meant-"

"Then what did you mean?" Rey retorted through gritted teeth.

"You have no ties." He replied hastily, shaking his head. "No shoes to fill, no lineage to follow. You are free to live as you wish, with no expectation…"

He paused. Did Rey imagine it, or was now his voice beginning to falter?

"And I've overestimated your abilities if you don't have the slightest idea of my feelings towards you."

Rey's lips parted but no words came out. She was certain that he could hear her heart thundering inside her chest.

"Don't you see, Rey? As darkness rises, light to meet it. The rise and fall of the Sith and Jedi. The Force's way of creating balance, just as it has done since the beginning of time. We exist because of each other. "

Rey was transported to the passages underneath Maz Kanata's castle. Beckoning voices of Jedi before her drawing her to the legendary lightsaber tucked safely inside a vault of past treasures: the same saber that would choose her in the snowy forest in her duel against the Supreme Leader's rising dark apprentice. She remembered Han's eager offer for her to join him, Leia's maternal instinct to embrace her in the aftermath of his senseless murder. Ben Solo had left a void in the wake of his journey to the dark side and Rey seamlessly filled it.

She suddenly began to feel lightheaded. She could feel his eyes scrutinizing her, hungrily waiting for her response.

"We are more alike than we are different. Snoke intended to destroy what he did not understand. He was foolish, stuck in the old ways. I don't benefit in destroying you. I want to understand." He said breathlessly. "You're possibly the only one who understands."

He had witnessed their parallels, deep her in consciousness in his search for the map leading to Luke Skywalker. She was hurt and suffering, much like he was. His expression as the Jedi Master's saber selected her was not one of resentment, but admiration. Their Force bond, despite Rey's initial aggression, was responded with a desire to know more without a trace of malice. They had shared trauma, exposed and bare during midnight whispers over a small fire.

Her acceptance of her parents' identity and the truth of her past caused her crushing heartache. While he was the product of a respected Senator and notorious war hero, abandonment came in many forms. His parents had saved the galaxy, but they were not able to save their only son.

"The old ways were Snoke's downfall, as they have been for Sith, and now, the Jedi. The Force seeks balance. As you feel light in me, I feel darkness in you. Luke Skywalker would have destroyed you too if he had been given the chance, if he had felt what I felt." He continued fervently, his once stoic features now replaced with those of a restless young man who had been freed of a lifelong bondage. "The Jedi are all but gone now. We're all that is left of our kind. Rey…"

Here they were again. A leather gloved hand raised, stretched out towards her.

"We can create something new."

Raining embers and defeated Praetorian Guards were now replaced by a crackling fireplace and empty red couches. His eyes forlorn and tired, but carried a slight glimmer of hope that her answer would not be the same.

"What can I do? I will do anything that you ask. Rey, please." If not for her spoken name, Rey would have believed that the tormented whispers of past phantoms had returned. Instead Kylo Ren, Master Luke's fallen apprentice and the menacing Supreme Leader of the First Order, was addressing her.

No, he was begging her.

I feel your darkness. Words that would have once distressed her now fell flat. She could not be disarmed by a truth she already knew. Like the light, the darkness inside her had always been there. She had sensed it. It festered through the nights she went to bed with only a quarter portions, cloaking her when she was desperate to sleep. She had felt it while captive in the interrogation chair as she rebuked his advances, deliciously feeding off his fears and doubts. It came to her in the form of bloodlust that night on Starkiller Base, as she paced hungrily over its apprentice, seduced to strike the fatal blow. It made her body hum with unusual strength. It had called out to her on Ahch-To and she had answered with little to no hesitation.

The Dark was sultry, tempting, and desirable. The Dark assured her it had the answers to her inmost questions. The Dark would show Rey her place in all this.

As if provoked, sudden warmth spread through Rey's body. The source not the simmering fireplace from a few feet away, but deep within. Leia's comforting voice reverberated through her. They will know that the Jedi live.

"You're wrong." With new purpose, Rey held his eyes, the glimmer of hope in them beginning to fade. "The Jedi are not gone. Not while I'm here. The Jedi Order may have been flawed, but they tried to do what was good, what was right." She thought back to Master Luke who had initially scoffed at her naïve optimism, but later had sacrificed himself for these ideals. - the very ideals that shaped the great Jedi Master so long ago.

"Battles of light and dark may come and go under different names, but there will always be what is right and what is wrong." As her voice grew heavy with significance, his hand fell lower to his side. "I cannot join you when you are unable to see the difference. You're on a path I will not follow."

Their connection through the Force had a way of diminishing entire systems between them, blurring the line of what was real and vision. Hushed tones, a brush of a hand, caressing of skin made their reality complete. At Rey's words a new divide flourished, one that was deeper than the chasm broken on Starkiller Base and wider than the Falcon's closed door she had shut on Crait. The small room on Naboo suddenly felt galaxies apart.

He swallowed, reluctantly accepting her answer. "So, this is the path you choose."

"Yes." Her voice was small. She was unable to prevent the tears that had started to brim.

The flames from the fireplace highlighted his burdened stature, shoulders rolled forward, defeated. His hair, dark and tangled, framed his sunken cheeks. Rey could hardly bear to meet his gaze and when she finally did, his eyes were just as she had dreaded - full of longing.

She knew what he yearned for. She had sensed it, tugging at far reaches of his mind.

She felt it as Luke Skywalker's saber first ignited in her hand, his jaw slack in wonder.

She felt it on Ach-To over a fire, a tiny hut shielding their moment from the dreary elements outside.

She felt it while standing in the cold, sleek elevator at the sound of his birth name leaving her lips.

She felt it in his voice, his desperate plea for her to join him in his quest to bring a new order to the galaxy. It was never meant to be a solely platonic alliance.

She felt it when she shut the Falcon's door on their connection, leaving him broken and alone on Crait's outpost floor.

Rey knew what he desired, because the Force had also shown her what might have been.

And she desired it too.

They regarded each other across the room in silence. There was no contempt or anger, just disappointment. The reality materializing before them was suffocating: he could not leave and she could not come to him. They could not be what the other wanted them to be. They could not fulfill the visions they had of each other.

"Ben…" Rey exhaled. She didn't know what she wanted to say, if she had anything to say at all. She longed to tell him how her heart had been breaking from the moment she had stepped off Crait and how her chest felt at any moment it would split wide open from the pain. How much she wished he would return to the light, return to his mother…

Come back to her.

"Goodbye, Rey." His farewell carried little weight. This would not be the last time the Force connected them, their bond had proved that with its persistence. It would continue to haunt them, like an itch that could never be scratched, or a thirst never quite quenched. A game of push-and-pull until someone conceded.

If only he knew what the Force showed her that night on Ach-To, maybe then he would turn. Rey's heart skipped a beat with sudden anticipation. Maybe, just maybe, he would come back to the light if he saw what could be in his future…

Their future.

A modest home sits along a shoreline, surrounded by lush, tall green grass. As Rey opens the front door, she is greeted by a brilliant sunset reflecting off the surface of calm sea, stretching out as far as the eye could see. A man stands still with his back to her, barefoot and ankle deep in the low waves as his beige tunic catches the breeze coming off the water. At the sound of Rey's approach, he breaks his meditative state to face her and at the sight of her, he grins. His smile is peaceful, fulfilled. Before Rey steps any closer, his attention shifts from her to her side, just below her waist. Puzzled, she also looks down and is met with the wide doe eyes. A child, no older than four with tussled dark hair, reaches up and eagerly pulls on the hem of her tunic. His eyes are warm, brown, and familiar. She knows who he is. For the first time, she has a family.

For the first time, there's balance.

Coming back to the surface from her reverie, Rey frantically calls out to him. "Wait, Ben!" If she revealed to him what she had seen, he would have to stay.

Rey quickly took two long strides to where he stood in front of the fireplace, but it was not enough. She had scarcely seen his agonized expression before the connection was severed, leaving her alone with her arms extended out to thin air.

She was too late.

The sun was beginning to rise and the shadows from the fireplace gave into purple and blue hues that filled the room as morning quietly approached. Feeling weak in her knees, Rey gave into their fatigue and sunk onto the plush couch. She reached up to touch her face, only to find it was damp, streaked with tears. She was not aware that she had been openly crying.

A series of beeps broke Rey away from her wistful trance as a small droid revealed itself from behind the couch. BB-8, of course. Though the BB unit lacked the facial features you'd recognize on a humanoid or similarly built species, it effortlessly expressed its concern with a head tilt to the side of its sphere frame. How long had it been here?

"I'm fine, Bee-Bee-Ate." Rey insisted, hastily wiping her face with the sleeve of her sleep robe. The stubborn droid rolled toward her feet, continuing a string of worried chirps. Despite herself, Rey forced a laugh. "Thank you, really. I'm okay. I just-"

"Rey!" A voice hollered from the hallway. Both Rey and BB-8 jerked their attention to the doorframe just in time to see Finn nearly miss it as he scrambled past. After regaining his footing outside, his head poked through into the room excitedly. "This house is huge, I've been looking all over for you!" Rey gave an internal sigh of relief that he didn't notice her blotchy appearance. "We're having breakfast outside on the balcony. Rey, it's gorgeous! You've never seen anything like it!"

"That sounds great, Finn!" Rey mustered enough enthusiasm to produce a half-hearted smile, masking her grief. It must have been convincing to Finn because he left her and the droid with two thumbs up and not another word.

"Go on, then. I'll be right there." Rey nudged BB-8 gently with her palm. It spun to face her, giving a low, skeptical whistle. She returned a small smile. "I will. And, Bee-Bee-Ate?" She felt silly, bargaining with the droid. "Can you promise to keep this between us?" I don't want anyone to worry." BB-8 responded by opening one of its tool-bay disk doors, revealing a tiny welding torch in an upright position. A thumbs up, clever.

Once BB-8 had rolled out of the common space, Rey was left alone once again. But she was not really alone - not truly anyway. She knew in a few minutes she would be greeted with kind words and embraces from friends over an abundant breakfast that only a princess could provide. This same group of devout individuals, Rey was certain, would share the same level of graciousness if there were mere rations on the table in the direst of circumstances.

All while he returned to a cold throne: Empty and devoid of love.

As she stood, Rey's hand absentmindedly grazed the couch's soft red fabric, reflecting back to the phantom voices she heard earlier that morning. She wondered what became of them and if their pain ever subsided. She hoped whatever the outcome, they had found peace in their decision.

The answer was not always clear, Rey learned. As a scavenger in a lawless wasteland on Jakku, she had fostered her integrity by following a simple code of ethics that had stemmed from her instinctive understanding of what was right and what was wrong. In her narrow scope of experiences of scavenging to survive and living amongst crooks, it had served her well. Endless late afternoons spent under the setting sun, scrubbing relics of a distant past, Rey would strain her ears in attempts to eavesdrop on fellow scavengers talks of past wars, myths of the Jedi and the forces that brought the oppressive Empire to its knees. The deteriorating hull, which once struck fear in the hearts of all that crossed its path, now at the mercy of those it oppressed. These legends would fuel Rey's daydreams on evenings that were spent a top her repurposed AT-AT, gazing longingly at the stars above. What would it be like, she had wondered, to be a force of good in a galaxy that was shrouded in corruption and suffering.

Now she was here, part of a narrative she had once believed was myth, and she understood new universal truths. No one in this galaxy was purely evil. Additionally, no one in this galaxy was wholly good. Everyone has a past, their own personal burdens, and their present decisions determine this fine balance in the gray.

Despite these facts, one reality remained constant: There is still what is right and there is still what is wrong. This was the truth the Jedi fought and sacrificed for.

And so would she.

Before exiting the common room to join the remaining Resistance, Rey paused briefly at the doorframe, giving a final glance over her shoulder at the fireplace. The flames had dwindled to mere flickers of sparks, breathing underneath the remaining wood.

The Resistance is the spark that will light the fire to burn the down the First Order.

She hoped in heart she would be the spark that brings back Ben Solo.

And with that, she joined her friends.

[the end]

"First comes the day

Then comes the night.

After the darkness

Shines through the light.

The difference, they say,

Is only made right

By the resolving of gray

Through refined Jedi sight."

- Journal of the Whills, 7:477

A/N: As it is my first Star Wars fan fiction, any feedback or comments would be SO appreciated! What did you like? What would you like to see more of in the future?

Thank you for reading! xox Rose