Written for LoveFromOQ 2018
Valentine's Day with Fire
Regina storms into the hospital, trying very hard not to let the shaking of her limbs and fear consume her. Her heart is racing in her chest, her breathing is labored, as if she's just finished running a marathon (in a way she did, she ran to the hospital). She pushes through all these feelings and rushes to the hospital reception, the worst case scenarios already playing in her head.
"I'm looking for Robin Locksley. Can I see him?" she spills out, breathlessly.
Her palms turn into fists as she tries to stop her hands from shaking. She curses herself over and over again for being a mess, for overreacting, but she just can't help it.
"I'm sorry, ma'am, you cannot see him right now. He's being treated at the moment." A young nurse explains and Regina exhales a breath she didn't know she had been holding. "You can wait in the waiting room," she adds and Regina nods her head, and follows the nurse without another word.
The waiting room is surprisingly empty, only a few people are sitting at the different corners of the room, their faces grey from exhaustion and fear of unknown. She feels her heart clenching as she takes a look around, feeling indescribable compassion for those who suffer.
"Regina!"
Her head turns towards the childish voice unconsciously and she blinks her eyes surprised when she sees a little figure running towards her. A small smile forms on her lips as the most adorable child she's ever had the pleasure to meet wraps his arms around her legs.
"Roland!"
She picks the boy up and presses him close, tears filling her eyes again at the thought of how this wonderful boy would be feeling if he lost his father.
Roland doesn't let her dwell on these horrible thoughts for too long, though, because he's pulling away from her, his dimples on full display. Regina blinks her tears away and smiles too, and then glances around the room one more time until she finds Marian looking at them.
Marian was the one who called Regina to tell Robin was injured during a fire. It turned out that her firefighter hero forgot to change his emergency contact after getting divorced.
When Roland starts telling her what he's been up to for the last few weeks, Regina breaths in, tightens her hold around the boy and walks to his mother.
"Hi," Marian says rather awkwardly as Regina sits down on the chair beside her.
Regina returns the greeting, shifting a bit on the chair and once she's comfortable, Roland cuddles into her embrace, still talking about his escapades in kindergarten.
For a brief moment Regina lets Roland's sweet voice take her away from the consuming fear that's eating her from the inside. She lets her eyes close as she inhales and exhales, trying to push all of her fear to the back of her mind.
"Is daddy going to die?" Roland's sudden question has Regina's eyes opening widely, her breath catching in her throat. Marian is staring at Roland too, and Regina can see how hard she swallows before taking Roland's hand in hers.
"Of course not, baby! Daddy's going to be fine," the woman says, her voice steady and strong, and Regina wonders just how worried Robin's ex-wife actually is.
"Your daddy is a hero, Roland," Regina says, surprised that her voice doesn't shake. "And we know that heroes always win. Your daddy will be fine," she assures, tears collecting at the corner of her eyes as memories of another stupid hero flash through her eyes, a hero who wasn't saved in time.
But Robin will be fine.
He has to be.
She cannot go through all of this again.
Roland nods his head and cuddles into Regina again. She smiles sadly, running her hand up and down his back, hoping to soothe the fears that should not torture a child this young; hoping to soother her own fears as well.
Silence surrounds them as Regina continues to rub Roland's back, humming a quiet melody as her still rapidly beating heart starts calming down.
However, as soothing as silence sometimes can be, it makes Regina's thoughts louder, makes her biggest fears seem even bigger.
"He'll be alright, you know," Marian's quiet voice makes Regina open her eyes and turn to the woman she didn't like a while ago but now feels thankful for having her here.
A single tear rolls down Regina's cheek and she wipes it away quickly, making Roland grumble quietly. She looks down to find him sleeping peacefully, traces of fear so evident on his face just moments ago all but gone.
Regina sighs as a few tears roll down her cheeks again, pressing her lips together tightly to keep her sobs in.
Marian looks at Regina, sympathy written all over her face, and Regina should not show herself so weak in front of a woman who a few years ago meant everything to Robin. They're on good terms, they are friends now but it doesn't change the fact that if Marian really wanted that, she could easily break Robin and Regina apart.
But the look on Marian's face seems so sincere, her own fear now more evident that Roland is asleep, her fingers moving relentlessly against the chair in a nervous pattern. Marian is Robin's ex –wife and she may be a threat but that woman knows best what Regina's feeling now.
"Sometimes I think that it's too much for me," Regina whispers, getting Marian's attention. She is not the best person to talk to about fears and uncertainty of her relationship with her ex-husband but Regina needs someone to understand her, so she continues, "Whenever I hear that there's a fire, my heart just… stops."
Marian nods her head, encouraging her to continue.
"I just cannot live, knowing that he's putting himself in danger every single day," Regina exhales shakily, tears filling her eyes again.
Marian sighs. "It is a dangerous job, indeed. But Robin is not stupid, he knows how to deal with it. It is his passion, you and me, we both know the way his eyes turn even bluer and sparkling when he talks about saving people. It's not just a job to him, it's his life.
Regina swallows hard. Of course she knows what it means to Robin, how happy it makes him. His passion was one of the many things that made her fall for him.
Despite that, her heart is still being crushed every time he's on call, she's dying inside every time he disappears between the flames to save the unfortunate ones.
"I don't want to lose another man to the flames," Regina admits quietly, her heart clenching at the painful memories. She closes her eyes and breathes in through her nose, tries to breathe through the knot of tears that's blocking her throat. She tries to breathe through all the grief and fear she still feels.
"Robin is careful," Marian says. "I cannot even imagine how hard it must be for you, but you have to trust him. He's not going to change. You have to accept that."
Regina knows it is true, too. Robin will not change and he's careful, he really is. They've been together for three years now and it's the first time he's injured so bad he needs to see a doctor. But she still feels constant fear.
Swallowing hard, Regina opens her mouth to thank Marian but the nurse walks up to them before she can utter a word. The woman announces that Robin is fine, it was only a minor burn and that they can go and see him now.
Marian wakes up Roland and when Regina composes herself, the three of them make their way to Robin's room.
(…)
Robin's laying in a hospital bed, his left hand wrapped up in bandages from fingers to elbow but apart from that he looks fine. He is alive and he's not going to die.
Regina lets out a breath of relief, her legs shaking underneath her so badly, she can barely stand. All the fear she felt washes over her like a tsunami, leaving her unsteady, standing at the doorway, words stuck in her throat.
"Marian? Roland?" Robin's voice is strong and steady but surprised and Regina blinks her eyes rapidly, trying to stop the tears.
He is really fine.
She watches from a distance as Roland runs towards Robin and jumps on a high hospital bed, little arms wrapping tightly around his father's neck. Robin returns the hug, pressing his child close to his chest, whispering something into his ear, something that Regina thinks is assurance.
Leaning against the door, Regina lets her eyes close for a moment, lets herself just breath through all the fear she's felt. Her legs are shaking underneath her as are her hands but she focuses on her breathing, on breathing in and out steadily and deeply, she focuses on the fact that Robin is alive and not dead. She focuses on the fact that she's not repeating her own story.
"Regina," Robin calls her name and she opens her eyes, finds him staring right at her, his brow furrowed in worry, his blue eyes piercing right through her soul.
The room is empty now, she was so lost in her fears and thoughts that she didn't notice when Marian and Roland had left.
Regina opens her mouth to say something but nothing comes out, only a soundless gasp.
Robin gets out of the bed then and the first few steps are wobbly, the painkillers he's been given must be really strong. Once he's close enough, he wraps his arms around her tightly, so tightly she thinks she may suffocate but she doesn't say a word, just rests her head against his shoulder, her own arms wrapped tightly around him as she tells herself over and over again that it's over, that he's alright.
She is pathetic.
She's so, so pathetic.
She hates herself for that.
Once upon a time she was strong and independent, an unbreakable woman, but the loss of her husband turned everything upside down. Once the mayor of a town is now a bookshop and café owner, living her quiet life in a different town, away from those who remember how her life turned to ashes.
A woman who was once strong and independent is still trying to repair her broken pieces.
And Robin knows that.
He knows that very well for now he's comforting her when he's the one who's been burned in every sense of a word.
Regina is not sure how much time passes until she pulls away from him and wipes tears away from her cheeks, confessing, "I was so afraid."
"I know." Robin says, pulling her closer again, pressing their lips together in a kiss.
"I thought you were going to die," she closes her eyes tightly, and shakes her head trying to shake all the memories of her dead husband out of her mind.
"I wouldn't leave you," he assures her and hugs her again and she wants to fight him, wants to push him away and scream out everything she feels but instead she lets him hold her for she's so tired, she just wants to forget about this day.
"It is the worst Valentine's Day," she whispers quietly, pulling away from Robin. "I had prepared dinner for you. I had even bought new lingerie to surprise you because I know how much you love this stupid and pathetic day. And you decided to ruin it all and terrify me!" she exclaims, taking a step back from him, her anger bubbling up, threatening to explode.
"You? You bought new lingerie just for Valentine's Day?" Robin asks, his voice incredulous yet surprised.
Regina has never liked Valentine's Day, she finds it pathetic, but Robin, her dear Robin loved it. And she wanted to surprise him, to make him feel loved and cherished for he made her feel like a damn Queen of the whole world every single day.
So she made dinner, bought red wine, even dressed up for him, covered the floor and bed in rose petals and stupid red hearts and waited for him to come back from his shift.
And then Marian called.
"Don't make a face," Regina says, rolling her eyes at Robin's stupid smirk. "You ruined it all."
She should smack him, he really deserved that.
"I'm sorry," Robin apologizes and pulls her closer and she goes willingly, pressing her lips against his again, breathing easier now that the fear is finally, finally fading away. "I had a surprise for you too," he says when they part, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.
"I bet you did," she smiles a bit for the first time this evening, recalling all the stupid yet very sweet ways Robin chose to surprise her on Valentine's Day before. She'd rolled her eyes every time he did something but deep down she liked that.
"It is not too late for my surprise, though," he adds and then he's taking a step back and she misses his warmth instantly.
She watches curiously as he walks to the couch where his coat is put (someone must have brought it for him from the station).He pulls out something and then turns to her with a goofy smile on his face.
Regina's heart stops beating when she sees a small black box in his hands, and her arms start shaking for all different reasons now as he walks up to her.
"I had a speech prepared for you, my love, but unfortunately it got burned. Thankfully this didn't," he says, looking at the box and then at Regina."I love you, Regina Mills. I love you so much. You've became my friend, my supporter, my everything." He stops to take a deep breath, tears filling his eyes and Regina feels her own eyes getting itchy and teary. "You're stunning, in every way. You are caring and thoughtful and Roland adores you and…." His voice hitches in his throat, "You're my future. You are everything I have ever wanted.
"Robin-" she whispers, tears rolling down her cheeks as he kneels in front of her, opening a black box. There's a ring, a ring with a small heart shaped diamond and she can only stare at it with her mouth opened.
"Will you marry me?"
Regina nods her head immediately without hesitation and then one moment he's putting a ring on her finger and the other he's kissing her desperately, their wet cheeks pressing together, their tears mingling. Their kiss is a mess, yet perfect.
When they finally break apart, Robin wipes away tears from Regina's cheeks and smiles a bit, biting his lip in a way that makes Regina's insides melt.
"Who would have thought that this awful Valentine's Day could become the best day of our lives?" Regina asks and Robin only smiles before pressing his lips against hers again.