Life goes on fine and all before your boyfriend grabs you by the shoulders on Friday evening, keeping your body pressed into the nearest empty classroom and forcing his tongue into your throat until you can't breathe. Others might've thought it romantic, or maybe adorable that you have someone that can't keep their hands off you for a single minute and that it's something you should appreciate until the end of time.

I find that illogical.

Idiotic. Stupid. Absolutely not anything close to lovely.

I never wanted a boyfriend.

But somehow that didn't happen. It all started at the beginning of the year when these girls from the neighbouring High Schoolー Osoka, or something like that, my older sister attended there tooー were talking about relationships. Lily was naturally great friends with them and had drug me into her bedroom one evening to have some heart to heart during their sleepovers. I never wanted to do that either.

Not that I had enough guts to refuse. They were obnoxiously scary, with their perfect brows and wing liners and fingernails painted a perfect crimson red. 'You have to do this while you're on your period to keep all the wandering spirits away.'

Um. Right. No thank you.

"Hey, Rin, do you have a boyfriend?"

It was that question that struck a chord within me. No, was the right answer. I wasn't looking for one and you won't be finding me latched to a boy's arm anytime in the near future. Not even because I dislike the mere thought of relationships, but also the fact that boys are gross.

Yes. Those of the male gender. That XY chromosome. I've never liked them before, and I will never ever like them. Rin Kagamine is very much a homosexual, this is not a phaseー yes, I'm looking at you, neighbourhood auntie that always gossips about other people's children and goes on and on about how her son is doing well in Med school: I am gay.

Gasp. Cue silence, clicking tongues of disappointment.

Not that anyone knew.

But I like Hatsune Miku. No ー I really really like Hatsune Miku. Lily's friend who's a year below her. Sixteen, cute, perky and bubbly and everything nice enough that I could get just a hug from her and I'd be happy enough to die in those arms until I turned into a rottened carcass and fell to merge with the sand. Miku is cute, and when she's the one asking you that type of question, with those deep green eyes that lure you in, there's nothing else to do than to whisper a strangled, "Yes."

There was a round of applause. Lily looked positively bewildered that I hadn't told her about this, about the recent update in my love life, and all these older girls were suddenly hounding me on details about who he was, what grade he's in, what school he went to, et cetera. I only winked and left without a reply, making sure the plans for my next day was properly mapped. Seem like a loser to Miku? No way. I won't bring my dignity down in front of a beauty like that. My school is segregated into two sections. Boys and girls, in two different buildings ー the majority of students belonged in the former and as sexist as this type of splitting orientation existed in the twenty first century, I will say that I admittedly like it. Boys aren't allowed to step a foot inside the girl's buildings, though girls are allowed to roam each and every section as much as they want. Though I've never done that. Like I said before: I hate boys. Dislike them. Maybe even loathe to a small extent.

Until that day I steeled enough courage, marched in, felt each stare as if they were looking beneath my skirt (they weren't, really, but my paranoia.. does... things) and closed my eyes with an arm reaching out for the nearest body in reach.

"What the ー"

"Please be my boyfriend!"

I hate myself.

My hand immediately shot back in red-handed embarrassment and when my eyes opened, I met the sight of narrowed oceans glaring back at me. Oh no, oh no no no, this is how my life ends, I'm going to die by the hands of a middleーschool boy at the age of fourteen just because I wanted to look cool in front of my crush. I deserve to die.

It wasn't until my gaze searched for the nearest window to jump off did my hands get snatched into a pair of wider ones ー and those narrowed eyes gleamed bright almost like they'd held a million stars.

"Yeah! I've always liked you ー um, I've been noticing you for a while! I mean, uh, of course! Yes!"

I felt the life drain from my soul.

.

.

.

.

And now we're here.

It's been two months since then.

A boy is touching my boobs. Actually touching them. Not a side graze or a stare, but I'm actually suffocating inside his mouth while he's got me seated over his lap, arms forced around his neck. Oddly, I still don't even know his name ー a trivial matter, because I won't be seeing this guy anytime soon but there's still that horrible reminder that I've got to be the one to end things. I'd hoped he'd get tired enough and dump me after a week of kisses on the cheek and slow occasions of hand holding.

He didn't. Instead he'd progressed it further; moving soft, slight pecks to full drawn out make outs where my breath ends up smelling exactly like his afterwards (green tea and mint) but I hate green tea and mint. Not to mention he's constantly trying to hold me, rubbing his hand above my shoulder, wrapping an arm around my waist... it's disgusting.

And those stupid other boys in his class were so proud. Oh, he finally has a girlfriend, how amazing.

"I think I want to go further.." He kissed my chin, below my jaw, and right at the curve of my neck. "Will you let me?"

Hell no. But he looks so much like a lost puppy, I can't help but feel my bottom lip tremble and allow a weak "...Nn-nhhhh," In protest.

Not that he cares.

"A teacher is going to see. I don't want to be caught..."

"It's okay. Nobody ever comes in here. You can relax, Rinー I'll make you feel good.."

Little does he know that nothing can feel good when a boy is touching me. I feel like crying. But I've got to be strong. I've got to do this for Miku. It's only a matter of time until she finally turns my way and when she does, we'll let out both our emotions in a storm of sloppy wet kisses that are niceー unlike this boy's dry onesー and we'll hug and kiss, and kiss, and kiss some more until there's nothing left to do but be together in the sweetest of ways.

The only reason I'm still with him is because Miku likes boys. And that's why I have to learn from him ー from an actual one, until I get enough information to please her like one. Only a little while longer and she'll prefer me over anything else.

My knees fold above his lap, and there's hardly a minute that passes before his fingers fly to my chest and he's beginning to unbutton each snd every thing that keeps my shirt intact. The cloth falls below my shoulders and his cool breath is tickling my ear now, but that's alright. It's always going to be alright. Just as long as I imagine he's Miku, and this is both of us doing this, just us. Me and her, and there's no golden-haired boy that finds pleasure in massaging my rear until it turns red and sore.

This is exactly why I hate boys. Perverts.

My hand clings onto his own. "Wait. Wait," What's his name? "Um ー baby.."

The nickname must've worked well because he looked up at me again with those eyes that looked so lovey-dovey, and his hands stopped trying to climb underneath my skirt and rub at the hem of my panties. Good. This is good.

"Baby, I don't want to do this here.. it's going to get so messy.."

"I love messy." He cooed.

Oh, you little shit.

My hands dug into his light tresses and I kissed the top of his head, hearing something that felt like a purr from his chest, all the while pretending it belonged to a similar green-eyed beauty and I was merely untangling the knots in her pigtails. That was enough to make my heart pound.

Apparently he'd loved that.

Enough to pop open my bra clasp and suckle on one of my buds.

I couldn't help but gasp. "Hey! Hーhey! Don't do that!"

"Mnn..." He only closed his eyes and batted those thick lashes, pouty lips stuck on my flesh without a care in the world. "Hn."

My chest ー exposed for the first time, to a boy, no less, and they're already being used. I can't help the shiver in my shoulders, especially when he'd rolled a stiff nipple along his tongue and suckled desperately, as if he'd manage to get something out. "Not so hard! Don't bite!" I'd gasped, in tears, feeling some sort of pleasant heat in the core of my stomach from the gesture. This is purely for Miku, right, Miku. If it wasn't for her, he wouldn't be an inch close to my breasts. "What are you doing?!"

This was supposed to be a game.

He was supposed to be a make-believe boyfriend, we weren't supposed to go through anything beyond holding hands much less kissing. Now this was going too far.

When he'd leant back, a trail of thick saliva coating from my nipple to the tip of his tongue, however, I couldn't help but shiver inside.

.

.

.

.

"Hey, Rin!" She was here again. That beauty, standing by the kitchen counter while Lily popped a marshmallow through those nice lips and covered her pretty mouth. "You're home late. Club activities?"

I felt my body redden. Everywhere.

It's a bit bothersome considering how I'd just wanted to get into a bath and wash all traces of his mouth off my breasts until my skin felt raw, but now, seeing her here, I didn't even want to leave. But it wouldn't be right ー having the trail of someone else's mark on me when the only reason I had it was for her.

It's alright. I'm coming for you.

"Yeah. Yeah, club activities." I responded quietly.

Don't worry Miku. It'll be just you and I soon. Just ー just wait for me, and let me improve for you.

Shameless Smut Fic, with first person perspective hell . Probably like, ten chapters (this will be predominantly RinxLen, Miku's going to appear less and less lol)