CHAPTER FOUR: Revelations

Hello everyone. Now that the world is on quarantine I've had a bit time to write. This is not actually at all how I imagined or planned this story to go but oops my hands just wrote what popped up in my mind. Hope you like it and I apologize for possible grammatical errors, English still is not my first language. And some errors might be because I'm slightly dyslexic as well so, my apologizes.

My heart felt lighter, I felt less anxious and it was quite relieving but at the same time wrong because I knew that I shouldn't feel like that. The scariest part wasn't the fact that I was living with werewolves, it was this whole shitshow put together and the werewolf part was my smallest problem. I was glad I got to talk to Peter because I somehow wasn't as afraid of him anymore, he became the man he is in my eyes not the man he might become. Obviously the fear wasn't all gone but I felt more brave around him, not like I was going have a panic attack every time I see him. So that was good.

I was in my room about to go to sleep when Talia came to check up on me. "Oh you are still awake.", she said when she noticed that I had my eyes open.

I got on half sitting position, "Yeah", I say quietly.

Talia came by the bed and smiled "Can I sit next to you?", she asked.

I made a go ahead motion with my hand. She sat down. She looked like she was thinking something over.

"How has your sessions been with your counsellor?", she finally asked. I mulled the question over, should I answer truthfully.

"They have been fine but to be honest they haven't helped, we only talk about school and I don't really want to talk to him about my personal stuff either", I said looking up to Talia.

"Yeah I thought so", she said, " I was thinking would it be better if we'd have talking session instead of you going to the counsellor?", she asked.

I nodded "Yeah I'd like that."

"Talia, thank you for everything you've done to me.", I said looking Talia into her eyes.

"I want tell you about me", I continued before Talia could say anything,

"I remember more about me now."

"I would love to hear all about you sweetie", Talia said catching a strand of my hair.

"Well first you should know is that English is not my first language, I don't remember the name of my language but I know it's not English", I started, "But I think you already knew that based on my name."

"I had two sisters and a brother", I said quietly, " I miss them so much even though I don't remember their names."

"Do you want us to try to find them?", Talia asked gently.

"There is no point they are dead", I said almost voicelessly, " All of them."

It wasn't true. They most likely were alive and I was the dead one.

"And I've been thinking", I continued already regretting what I was about to say, " That I might be dead as well".

Clearly Talia wasn't thinking that the converstation would lead there. Her face showed all kinds of emotion confusion, sadness, surprise.

"Honey what do you mean?", she said looking straight in to my soul.

I looked at her trying to from something understandable. "I don't think this is real, that I am real. That you are real. I'm pretty sure I am dead", I say looking down at my hands.

"I don't know if this is my own designed hell or something, but this can't be real."

Talia looked at me, she looked sad. If I were her, I would be too because she is handling a kid who is truly fucked up.

"You are real Venla, I am real." She said as she took my hands into hers. "You are not dead."

I laughed. An ugly laugh. Maniacs laugh.

"Then why everything is so fucked up?", I say not realizing that I cursed. "Talia this can't be real because I can see the fucking future and it ain't pretty."

" I've been trying to change the future, to save you but nothing is working and I'm running out of time.", I said looking the woman who saved me pleadingly. "So I need your help."

I wasn't really planning to tell Talia but I just happened, words just came out of my mouth.

Talia was clearly very confused and most likely thought that I am mentally broken rather than being a psychic or something.

She smiled trying to calm me down.

"Venla of course I will help you but this really doesn't make any sense.", she touched my forehead, trying to see if I have fever or something.

"I can't tell everything because I don't want to make a mess and cause the apocalypse or something", I said wanting to tell her everything but being scared if doing so causing something bad to happen.

"Okay you don't have to believe me Talia as I truly might be just crazy or dead. But okay here we go".

I try to organize my thoughts so that I make some sense.

" Remember when I told you about Derek's boyfriend, how I thought the whole thing was a bit inappropriate", she nods, " Well that's true she was way too old for her but that wasn't the only reason I told you", I take a deep breath.

"That woman, Kate Argent was going to burn your house down with everyone in it. I thought we skipped a bullet when you made her leave but I've been feeling very uneasy lately, like I was on fire. So I think Kate is back and she will try to kill us all. No, I know she will try to kill us all, sooner rather than later." I fell quiet giving Talia time to think.

And all I got was a "Okay honey, I hear you, It's late so lets talk about this tomorrow".

We said our goodnights and I was left with a question 'was this a mistake'.

And mistake it was. In the morning I found out that I didn't have to go to school because I was going to see a child psychiatrist with Talia. And that made me cry. I had been almost a year in this world and that was the first time I threw a temper tantrum. Yeah I know very mature of me but I was so disappointed at the whole thing. Talia clearly didn't believe me.

And me being in a wheelchair gave me no opportunity to escape. I fucking missed my legs.

We drove in silence, tears covering my face because I cried and I was just so fucking tired. Talia glanced at me with apology in her eyes, she clearly didn't like this but thought this was what had to be done.

When we got to the waiting room, I found out that this was an emergency meeting. Apparently the psychiatrist thought that I had to be very quickly evaluated because well I have to admit it sounds bad. A ten-year-old thinks she is dead and is certain that someone is going to kill them all.

We got called in. I was nervous, Talia seemed to be as well. The psychiatrist was a young blonde woman, with a white bright smile. She shook Talia's hand then mine. She smiled at me and told me how nice it was to meet me. I knew how to be polite but at that point I just was pissed. I didn't smile her back.

She asked me if I wanted to tell her why I thought we were there that day, I just shook my head declined the opportunity to talk.

"So Venla your mom called me last night about something that worried her", the woman said,

"And what she told me made me a bit worried as well, that's why you are here"

"Do you know what made your mom worried?", the woman asked gently.

I didn't want to answer but the silence was killing me. "The things I said", I said quietly.

"Yes the things you said", the woman repeated, "Do you want to tell me what about you said made your mom worried."

I didn't really have to think about what was so distressing about the things I said but I was quiet for a second.

"The stuff I said about death.", I finally said, looking the woman in the eyes for the first time. "But it was all I joke, I shouldn't have had said anything, I'm sorry", I hurriedly added.

Talia and the woman made eye contact. Talia looked a bit sad.

"You have nothing to be sorry about but we just want to understand why you said those things, even if you said it as joke", the woman said clearly not believing the joke part.

I felt like crying, I just wasn't ready to be interrogated like this. I wiped a tear a way, trying to catch it before anyone noticed but they did.

"Why are you sad?", the woman asked.

My throath tightened. I didn't want to cry, so I said really quietly. " I didn't want to cause any trouble, it was a mistake to say anything."

"Honey you didn't cause any trouble, we are glad that you said something because we want to help you.", the woman continued.

"I don't want or need your help.", I say a bit angrily, "Just forget it".

The psychiatrist looked at me. "Are you dead?", she said looking in to my eyes. That for some reason made my heart sink.

"Your mom told me yesterday that you believe that you are dead, so are you?"

I stared at the woman and thought about her question, really thinking about it AM I DEAD. And I didn't know. I truly couldn't truthfully answer the question and say no I am not dead.

"I don't know", I said, "I don't feel dead but everything is so surreal that I might as well be dead."

"What do you mean surreal?", the woman pressed.

"Not real, like I feel like this life is not real. It shouldn't be real you know.", I said trying to explain the feeling I have had since I popped up in this world.

"I just feel like this world is not mine, this body is not mine. Well it is but not the way it was. And I know thing that I have no way of knowing."

"Thing like somebody trying to kill your family?", the woman asked.

"Yup!", I say.

"Venla do you ever see things that others don't seem to see?", the woman asked, writing some stuff down.

"The future, I can see the future and as far as I know, no one else can.", I say smirking in my mind,

"And what does the future look like?", she asked.

"Apocalyptic", I say.

The woman looks at Talia and sights.

"Venla is it okay if I talk to your mother for moment in private, you can play with the toys meanwhile", she asked me and I just nodded and wheeled myself towards the toys.

I grap one in my hand and just hold it there so I'd look like I was playing with it. I fucked up but I can't lie to Talia anyways so what the fuck.

They talked for about ten minutes when they came back. Talia came by me and took my hand.

"We talked with Sandra (The psychiatrist) that you should stay here a bit so she can get to know you.", she said gently.

"I'm gonna go run some errands and come back to pick you up before dinner, okay?"

I voicelessly said no and shook my head. But Talia just got up and said "See ya!", and left, leaving me at the mercy of this woman.

She was nice and everything but I all I wanted was to go away.

She clapped her hands together and said joyfully, "I thought that we could play with toys for a bit what do you say?"

I looked at the woman and the toy in my hand. It is easy to fool ten-year-olds that I'm into their games and playing but could I fool an adult. Thought of playing with an adult as an adult was terrible.

Pretty soon after Sandra the psychiatrist realized that I really didn't know how to play with toys. She wrote something down and announced to my relief that we'd do something else.

She was nice and she clearly cared about her patients.

"It was very nice to meet you Venla!", she said when it started to be the time for me to leave.

I was relieved, I get to go home where my every move is not evaluated.

Talia and Sandra spoke in private for a moment. Talia came out of the room with stack of paper in her arms smiling to me "Want to get some ice cream?", she asked.

I smiled back at her and said "Sure!"

So that's how I got myself into being a regular at the children's psychiatric care. Fun. But it wasn't that bad, at least I got to vent my crazy life to someone who didn't judge.

They probably would've diagnosed me with all sorts of things but they decided to post pone the actual diagnosis and possible medications till I was older.

I would love to hear your opinions about this chapter and generally about the story. I was thinking about that I might jump into the future few years, so Venla and the people of Teen Wolf would be a bit older. What do you think, would it be a good idea?