A/N: Chapters are going to be coming out more slowly now, sorry! Life's getting busy. I had many different ideas on how to take this story and this was the awkward bridging chapter that I didn't really know how to fill without it sounding really weird or unrealistic but I hope this is good enough. Disclaimer: Characters may be a bit OOC. Also, I didn't really intend to write too long a story because of the limited time I have, so it may be progressing at too fast a pace than some of you would prefer, apologies!

I continued my research on my laptop. I still believed that Hikigaya-kun had a high enough intellectual capability to understand the underlying meaning behind the bees, I just had to continue trying to pass the message to him. My mind was still a wreck from thinking about Yuigahama and Hikigaya-kun and the complications that were our relationships. But one thing I learnt was that the best way to keep your mind off something is to focus your entire mind on something else. So for now, I tried my best to continue researching on ways to make it more obvious to Hikigaya-kun that his methods were completely wrong. And it did work. I spent my time just researching about different analogies to Hikigaya-kun that I stopped contemplating about the future of the relationships of the three of us, though I knew that this was only running away from the problem and that we'd have to face it eventually. But I wanted to run from it for as long as I could. I was scared to face it. My fingers moved mechanically on the keyboard, trying to find the next step to my plan. Work had always been my sanctuary.

Hm… Should I try dolphins then? Maybe using an animal whose altruism doesn't require its self sacrifice could show Hikigaya-kun that there are other ways to go about problems. Sighs. Hikigaya-kun that dimwit. I didn't think trying to change him would be so difficult at first, especially trying to do it using the mask of a stranger. Why didn't I just do it as a friend, actually? Would that have been more effective? I don't know. Furthermore, something about confronting Hikigaya-kun about the way he does things didn't sit well with me. Would he hate me? Or stop talking to me? My doubts persuaded me to simply continue using my current plan, using the identity as an unknown first year student to persuade him. Then again, with Yuigahama on board, maybe I could try something more obvious instead. My plan sounded sillier and sillier the more I researched. Why couldn't that dimwitted Hikigaya-kun just take a hint at the insectarium... Ugh. Maybe I could discuss this with Yuigahama. I considered for a second before the sight I saw yesterday appeared in my mind again. Hikigaya-kun in Yuigahama's arms… No… I won't ask for her help. I won't let her interfere anymore. I'll change Hikigaya-kun myself. My selfish desire to be the one person who changes Hikigaya-kun made me have tunnel vision even though I knew using Yuigahama's help would've made things easier. I… I just didn't want to. I won't let Yuigahama be the one Hikigaya-kun notices again… I want to be the one who does it. If Yuigahama comes on board, she'll be the one noticed by Hikigaya-kun for everything, while I fade into the background… No… I won't let this be…

I suddenly snapped back to reality. What was I just thinking? Was that my selfishness overcoming me? Was I really jealous of Yuigahama and Hikigaya? Did I really want Hikigaya-kun's attention on me… I could feel my face burning up. I was embarrassed for thinking of all that. My sole purpose was to help change Hikigaya-kun for his own good. Not for him to notice me. Or at least that's what my initial goal was. Right now, I'm not even sure what I'm trying to achieve. Is changing Hikigaya-kun all that I want? Is that still my primary objective? Ugh. What's going on with me? I clenched my fists on my thighs as I stared blankly at my laptop screen. Even when I try to work, the thought of our relationships won't leave me alone. I eventually picked up my phone and decided to text Yuigahama. Maybe she had some ideas that I could use.

"Hey Yuigahama, do you have any ideas on how to change Hikigaya-kun?" I texted her.

"I was planning to just talk to him directly tomorrow in class. He's pretty oblivious, so I thought telling him straight would be the best thing to do." She replied fairly quickly.

Yuigahama was already planning on acting on her own? I thought that upon including her in my plan she'd be working together with me to change Hikigaya-kun but apparently she didn't think the same way. She was already planning on talking to Hikigaya-kun tomorrow without informing me about it. I felt betrayed. But then again, I found it hard to blame her. I was having the same thoughts just a second ago - doing everything without telling Yuigahama about it. But I can't just let her talk to Hikigaya-kun and convince him. That'll only make her more noticeable to Hikigaya-kun and thus making me less noticeable to him by comparison. I can't allow that. Yet at the same time, I couldn't exactly muster the courage to confront Hikigaya-kun face to face about his mindset problem. I guess that's where Yuigahama is much better than me - free from the confines of the anxiety of an extreme introvert. I worried too much about how Hikigaya-kun would view me to do such a thing. But if it actually works out, Yuigahama would be given all the credit.

"Can I come with?" I typed into my phone but was still deliberating on whether I should send it. I was in a serious dilemma. No, I was the one who wanted to change Hikigaya-kun. It's only right that I followed Yuigahama to talk to Hikigaya-kun. Besides, she'll do all the talking anyway, there's no harm in my following her and Hikigaya-kun will notice me that much more. Before I knew it, my intention to change Hikigaya-kun now came with the side goal of trying to get him to notice me. Why do I even want that dimwit to notice me so much? I didn't even know how to answer myself. I clicked the send button in the end. I didn't want to be left out of everything.

Yuigahama replied quickly again. "I don't think it's necessary. It's more convenient for me since I'm in his class anyway. I think I'll be able to handle it on my own." Did I read this wrongly? I was expecting Yuigahama to agree to allow me to at least be there when it happens, but she actually didn't even want me there. She wanted Hikigaya-kun all for herself. I have to be there, I can't let Yuigahama be the only one. But, I don't have an actual reason to go now since Yuigahama said she'd be fine by herself. It'll appear too obvious that I wanted to be there. I mean, I could still go as a friend who's concerned about him, right? Would he interpret it that way? I knew I was overthinking things and this was all just my paranoia speaking but I couldn't do anything to get rid of it. These thoughts continued to plague me. I guess I'll just leave it to Yuigahama, albeit extremely reluctantly. All my previous efforts were all for naught if Yuigahama could simply change Hikigaya-kun just like that. Why couldn't I be as good as Yuigahama in talking to people? Ugh. I slammed my fist into the table. Why…

Another boring day in the prison that is school. I've spent countless of days here everything has become part of a routine already. Some sights appear almost as though they are part of the school environment. I took a glance at Hayama and his clique of friends. Like that one. I pictured myself sitting alone at my seat, with nobody within a ten metre radius. And this one. I slumped forward onto my desk. I stared intently at the clock, watching the seconds tick by. I couldn't wait to return to the comfort of my video games. I counted down to the end of lesson as the second hand of the clock made its rounds.

The long awaited school bell finally rang as people dashed out the classroom doors. I didn't exactly like to show my excitement to go home, so I lazed about in the classroom for a bit too. Lethargically, I set my books back in their bag. The clicking sound of school shoes on the classroom floor got my attention while I was about to pick up my bag. I raised my head to see Yuigahama standing before me. What's she doing? There wasn't club today so there was no reason for her to walk up to me.

"Ya-hallo, Hikki…" She looked nervous. "You got some time to talk in the clubroom?" She wanted to talk to me in the clubroom? This was a first. Her nervousness made me feel uneasy about the talk to come.

"Uhm… sure," I responded while picking my bag up and standing up such that my eyes were level with Yuigahama's. "Will Yukino be there too?" I followed up. I thought maybe it was some emergency Service Club meeting, though I'm not sure under what circumstances will we ever need to call such a meeting. The question didn't seem to please Yuigahama much as she looked annoyed. Did I say something wrong?

"No, I didn't want to bother her." A talk between only Yuigahama and I? More and more questions popped into my head. What could she possibly want to talk to me about? Puzzled, I followed her lead as she strolled to the clubroom ahead of me. For once, she had even packed her bag before me. Something was definitely amidst. She opened the clubroom door gently and sat at her usual seat. Likewise, I sat in mine, quite a distance away from hers. "Close the door, Hikigaya-kun." She signalled for me to shut the door. I was still confused, but obeyed her instructions anyway, getting up to close the door before returning to my seat. I felt queasier with each second that passed as we sat there quietly for a bit. This was even more painful than waiting for school to end. What did she want to tell me? Her serious face then broke into a small giggle. Again, I never could understand the feelings and fickleness of the people. One moment ago, she was just having a stern face and the next moment she's giggling.

"You're so dense, Hikigaya-kun." Her giggling finally ceased. With a small grin on her face, she stared directly at the tabletop whereas I was looking at her. She was fidgeting with her skirt. "Sometimes, you just can't understand something that's placed right in front of you." I thought that my questions would be answered once she began speaking but questions continued to bombard my mind. What's she referring to? She followed up with a moment of silence.

"What do you mean?" I finally broke the silence. My curiosity was beyond piqued. She stood up. The screeching sound of the chair scratching against the ceramic classroom floor reverberated in the air. She walked steadily toward me.

"Do you remember the night at the bamboo woods?" She set herself on the table and faced the back of the classroom. For some reason, she didn't want to face me even when she was talking to me.

"Yeah…" It happened quite a while back but I remembered it. Possibly one of the most noble things I've done, I must say, satisfying three people's request at once with just one sentence from my mouth. I saved Tobe from getting rejected, Ebina from having to reject Tobe and helped Hayama keep the status quo he wanted in his clique. Even till today, they are still a rather tight clique. I grinned to myself. Then, I remembered Yukino's and Yuigahama's reaction to my actions afterwards. "What about it?" My grin began to vanish as I slowly realized the direction this conversation was going.

"I didn't like it."

"Hm...?" Her responses had all been rather vague today. I wished she got to the point more quickly. Is this how other people usually talk to people? The mystery of human conversations will forever remain unknown to me.

"Do you like me, Hikigaya-kun?" I didn't understand where this conversation was heading anymore. Her questions began to seem as if they were at random.

"I mean, as a friend, yeah, of course." I was assuming that's what she meant.

"You didn't seem to care when I told you I didn't like it." She didn't sound like her usual self. Her upbeat, cheerful personality changed to a serious and seemingly scary one in the span of just a day.

"Huh? I didn't know you were so hung up about it. What did you not like about it?" I failed to see the cons of fulfilling three people's request with a single sentence. Yuigahama lowered her head and sighed in disappointment.

"I honestly don't know what I see in you," she mumbled under her breath, barely audible for me to hear. "You're much more oblivious than I expected." Her volume was much louder now. "Do you remember what Yukino and I told you that day after it happened, at least?" I tried my best to reach the depths of my hippocampus. It happened so long ago but if I couldn't answer her, I was sure there'd be a rather serious consequence.

"Something about not liking my methods," I eventually recalled, vaguely. I turned away from her to look at the floorboards. Is this what this is about? I never understood what they meant about disapproving my methods. Besides, my method was exactly what solved that problem. Was there anything wrong? Did anything bad come out of it? Not that I knew of. How could they be bad? A tiny smile crept up her face.

"At least you remembered that." Her voice began to sound shaky.

"But I never understood it."

"That was only what Yukino said. I said something different." She swung her head downwards such that she was facing the floorboards too. "Though I'm not surprised that's all that you remembered," she added softly. I returned her with a clueless expression. I don't think I have much recollection on what Yuigahama said then. "I said I never wanted to see something like that." She spared me the agony of continuing to dig my brain for the answer. Her response left me even more puzzled. Why did she want me to remember that? "I also asked if it would kill you to just spare a thought for other people's feelings," she continued. The method was the most effective way in my opinion. I considered the requests of all three of them and reached this method as the most effective one, what was so wrong about it?

"I did. I took into account Tobe's request, and Hayama and Ebina also mentioned that they wanted to maintain-"

"I didn't mean their feelings. There are many other people around you, Hikki." She cut me off. "Do you know how much pain I felt when I heard you say those words that night. You told Ebina that you'd always liked her. I figured out that it was a lie afterwards but even so, I felt so hurt and in pain." I didn't understand her at all. Why did she feel pain when I just lied about liking Ebina? After all, everybody around us probably knew it was a lie. My clueless expression must've given away that I still didn't understand Yuigahama's point. "You still don't get it do you…" I heard her exhale sharply in disappointment. I began to hear the dripping of droplets on the clubroom floor. "Everytime you think of such stupid methods and sacrifice yourself like that. It hurts the people around you, you know. It hurts me, it hurts Yukinon too. Seeing you belittle yourself and look down upon yourself as less than others. It's painful. Have a little dignity in yourself, Hikki." The sound of her dripping tears became more frequent. "Sure, this may have worked last time but that was when there was no one else around you. But now, you have us. You have people who care about you and we can't take it every time you just treat your dignity and reputation as nothing and just sacrificing yourself."

So these were how my actions were interpreted by others. Was this what Yukinoshita meant when she said she hated my methods? Maybe all these years spent alone with practically nobody to care about me except my own sister was detrimental to how I interacted with others in the future. For years, I've never considered hurting others as a result of my self-sacrifice as a possibility. "You feel hurt when I sacrifice my reputation and dignity?" I voiced my concern, still slightly unconvinced.

"It's called caring for you, Hikki. How would you feel if I sacrificed my own reputation. If I went to tell a random guy I don't even know that I always had a crush on him for the sake of someone else?" Her crying ceased as she turned to take a glance at my expressionless, thoughtful face. "On second thought, maybe I don't really want you to tell me your answer." I was glad she said that too, or I was pretty sure I was going to say something she didn't want to hear. "Point is," she followed up. "You need to know now that there are people who care about you, who get hurt by your sacrificial actions. I know you don't personally understand this, probably because you never felt this way before, but I hope you'll keep this in mind anyway. There are consequences to your actions."

I kept silent, trying to digest all that she had just said. It was true that I never felt this way before or had the thought that sacrificing my own reputation would hurt the feelings of those around me. "People always told me that if I changed myself, I'll change the world. I never believed them. It never worked. The image and reputation of me being a loner was long etched into everybody's minds. No matter how much I used to try, I'd always be seen like a loner. I learnt that my reputation never mattered, so why not use it as a tool to help others? It's not as if my reputation could get much worse anyway."

Just then, the door slid open. Yukino stood at the door with an angered face. "You don't get it do you?" Her voice was slowly increasing in volume, though not to that of a shout yet but she was clearly annoyed. "Stop thinking about only yourself or whoever you're trying to help. It isn't just about the both of you. You've got me and Yuigahama now. Why don't you help our feelings by stop being such a selfish person and stop treating your reputation like it's a joke? Can't you see that you're not a loner anymore? So stop treating yourself like one, it sickens me." Her volume suddenly decreased drastically. "It hurts me…" She paused for a moment. Her angered expression was gradually fading. "I don't know about changing the world by changing yourself, but I can assure you that by changing yourself, you'll at least be changing my world. And even Yuigahama's." Her voice grew shaky as she looked down to hide the tears forming in her eyes. I could see her tightly grabbing onto her skirt. I'd never seen Yukinoshita this worked up before. I shifted my gaze between the two of them, two crying faces - crying because they cared for me and couldn't stand watching me get hurt, even though I never minded it that much myself. I'd taken this for granted all along. I always craved for something genuine but it was right in front of me all along. A friendship where people cared about me. The genuine feeling of care and concern, I finally feel it. I never experienced it, so I never realised that this was what it was all about, until now. My emotions overcame me as tears started forming in my eyes too. I stood up as the deafening screech of the chair on the floorboard caught their attention.

"Sorry." I could hear my own voice beginning to break from the crying. "And thank you. I'm sorry I never realised it till now, but thank you for helping me realise it. That I wasn't facing the world alone anymore. That I have you two to care for me and vice versa now. That there was something genuine between us all along." I never liked to be sentimental, but in this moment I couldn't help it. "I'll try to change myself." Yukinoshita was right, it was time I stopped doing things only for myself. "For now, at least, I promise to try not to suggest any self-sacrificial ideas for our requests." Bright smiles appeared on their faces despite their teary eyes. I couldn't help but smile too. I never felt this way before, but I'm happy I finally did. It was going to be hard to change my mindset completely, I knew that but for them, I'll at least try. "Thank you…" I could feel the tension around our relationship easing slowly and I hope both of them felt the same way too. Maybe sometimes being honest with each other is the best thing to do. Now I know what to do to make them happier and to make our relationships better. Although silence once again enveloped the room, this time, I didn't mind it as much.

We all took a while to calm ourselves down. Hikigaya-kun left soon enough after the conversation. He mentioned that he had to do something for Komachi, leaving just Yuigahama and I in the room.

"How did you know we'd be here?"

"I come to the clubroom quite frequently even if there wasn't club." I told a half-lie. It was true that there were occasions which I would go to the clubroom even when there wasn't club, but not today. I was rushing around the entire school looking for them ever since the school bell rang before eventually finding them at the clubroom. I stood outside the door for a while just eavesdropping on the conversation up till the point I felt I really had to step in, when I couldn't control myself anymore, when I couldn't take Hikigaya-kun's density anymore. I couldn't pinpoint the exact motivation for me to find them. Part of me couldn't stand just the thought of Yuigahama talking alone with Hikigaya-kun, the other part didn't want Yuigahama to be alone when she was trying to convince and change Hikigaya-kun as I felt I could be of some help. "Anyway, thanks for your help." I tried my best to sound sincere but I still felt betrayed that she wanted to do this all by herself, and even planned on not informing me about it.

"I did it for myself… not you…" she muttered at an inaudible volume. "I'm not the nice girl you think I am." I heard that part. Slowly, I was discovering what she meant, although I'm not entirely sure if I wanted to continue discovering it. "So, I guess you don't have to pretend to be a first year student to talk to Hikki anymore!" Was this her revealing her ulterior motive? Was this why she wanted to get this over with so quickly? But she was right. Since Hikigaya-kun promised us already, there was no reason for me to continue pretending to be a first year student.

"Yeah…" I agreed, reluctantly.

"See you tomorrow, Yukinon!" She skipped out of the clubroom.

But just because I don't need to pretend to be one, doesn't mean I can't continue to be one. I wasn't like Yuigahama. Every time I saw Hikigaya-kun I wouldn't be able to talk to him as normally as I used to. I didn't know why but I hated it so much. I had zero experience regarding these kind of things. Now, with the website, I can continue using the anonymity to talk to Hikigaya-kun without feeling as nervous because he won't know it's me. I was so envious of Yuigahama - her ability and fearlessness to just confront Hikigaya-kun the way she just did was something I couldn't do. Even by saying those few words to Hikigaya-kun that I just did, I was getting worried about how his impression of me would change. She found it so easy yet I had to come up with a convoluted elaborate plan to try and change Hikigaya-kun. I was really envious of her. All I wanted now was to talk more with Hikigaya-kun even if he didn't know it was me, maybe find out more about him so I could interact with him better in real life. I was such a failure at socialising and interacting with people in real life. I sighed. Besides, no one else will know it's me now, I just need to be more careful not to let Yuigahama find out again. I retrieved my laptop from my bag, accessed the club website and began typing another private request.

Hey Hikigaya-kun…