What I Wanted

Chapter 1

"You know I'm okay now right.?" Brooke asked. Looking up at Lucas. As she walked from her bedroom to the living room where he remained sitting on her couch.

Turning to her he placed down the purple monkey to the side of him.

"Don't forget to take that on your way out and ask Haley and Peyton what the return policy is on all the stuff they bought me." Brooke said. Taking a seat next to Lucas.

"I think you should keep all that stuff especially this." Lucas said. Looking to the purple monkey.

"There is no need for it between Sam and Angie me losing them both. I need to give my heart and head time to heal from that." "Which for me means jumping back into my sketching and creating new clothes for my line." Brooke said. Looking back at him.

"That is completely understandable why you would want to close yourself off from ever wanting to have the single thing you've wanted for so long given how it always ends up. But because you have such a big heart and want to help everyone especially the people you care about I know that the door isn't shut on the idea completely." Lucas said. Looking up at her.

Brooke gazed over at him. Smiling. "You think you know me so well don't you Luke.?" Brooke asked.

"I don't think so. I know you Brooke and you know me." Lucas said. Looking back at her.

"Remember when I asked you if this was how you thought our lives would turn out and you said not exactly. Then I asked if you ever wanted to go back and would you do it differently." Brooke said.

Bringing the purple monkey from his side to hers.

Lucas looked up at her and spoke the words reemerging as if he had spoken them yesterday. "I would try to appreciate the things I took for granted." He said in response.

"You never told me what those things were. If I'm being honest that's something I've wondered about. From time to time." Brooke said. Feeling herself start to open up to him. The way she promised she wouldn't. Because once that began it was a thin and easily breakable line that tethered between their past and the unspoken connection and underlying feelings that neither of them would ever speak on. Given the triangle that had taken place and all the hurt and pain it had caused. Practically destroying the three of them.

Haley told me all about the infamous kiss at Peyton's studio. She walked away in shock and surprise. Unable to wrap her mind and thoughts around it. And I calmed her down and then made sure Lindsay looked stunning on her wedding day in a dress I designed. Only for her to leave Lucas at the alter and the rest of us scrambling to figure out what came next then there was Jamie's kidnapping. Everything came to a stand still until we saw him walk through the door and run towards his parents.

It's been weeks since that day. And for the most part. We've all begun to pick up the pieces. I will never voice the ache in my heart that I felt watching him almost marry her. Which feels wrong because we're supposed to friends. I mean we are friends. High school ended a long time ago. Even after all this time seeing his smile, hearing his laugh, or having these talks we've been having lately. Feels good and I have no idea what to make of it. Him or myself at this point.

"I would appreciate Keith, every second him and I spent together with my mom. Basketball having to give that up even though it was necessary. And of course, you." Lucas said. Locking eyes with Brooke.