Nine-ish times kisses were shared between individuals, and one time a loophole was found

Or, the one in which I find a writing/art challenge and run with it, expecting plotless fluff between Saber and Shirou, and end up with... plot-and-story related fluff about the relationships between the knights in my Cafe!AU. Go figure.

(Also, for those who might be new, this AU is set in modern day London, with Saber and most of her Knights of the Round working in a cafe and Meeting New People. Reading the main fic is recommended.)

This is set sometime after Chapter 36's Rice Pudding, but before Chapter 48 of Café.

1. Forehead Kiss - Merlin and Artoria/ Artoria and Mordred

Merlin was sitting at the kitchen counter, head leaning on his hands while he watched the Knights scurry along with their work. His eyes fell onto Artoria as his former charge grinned at Kay, both good-naturedly ribbing each other while studying the expenses.

Merlin smiled, sighing softly.

Artoria looked up from her paper and walked over to him, one hand loosely on the counter. "Is something the matter, Merlin?"

Concern flickered across her eyes. "Maybe you ought to stay home for another day or two before you get back to work."

She had sat down next to him, so it was easy to catch her off guard as he smiled an uncharacteristically soft smile at her, before leaning forward without his usual vigor.

"I am perfectly fine, Artoria," he murmured against her forehead.

How far she had come already.

Mordred was looking shiftily to the side as Artoria patched up her arm, resolutely not meeting her father's eyes.

"You will be the death of me someday, Mordred." Artoria sighed, in the finishing lines of her tirade. "You should be glad that Mr. Beagle simply chose to shove you away instead of anything more drastic."

Mordred flinched. She and the Detective Boys had been doing their routine check-ups, when they noticed a commotion; a girl (classmate) had been manhandled by a fellow thrice her age, and Mordred thoughtlessly jumped to her defense. She'd almost broken her arm in the process, but the girl was safe.

"You do not plan on telling your mother, do you?"

Mordred shook her head, mumbling something suspiciously sounding like 'I don't want to worry her'.

Artoria shook her head as she tied the bandage around her arm. "Do not do anything so thoughtless again, do you hear?"

Mordred nodded, still not meeting her father's eyes. Artoria sighed.

Her lips brushed against Mordred's forehead softly. "Still," she leaned back, smiling. "I am glad nothing happened to you."

2. Eskimo Kiss - Guinevere and Lancelot

Laughter was bubbling in her throat as she side-eyed Lancelot, her body and hair wrapped in the fluffiest towels she could find, still wet from her bath earlier.

"Hmm~" Guinevere grinned.

The former Knight of the Lake, who was in the process of taking off his rain-soaked coat, was caught off guard between an embarrassed blush at having been caught staring and a sly smirk with a witty retort at having been caught staring.

So he threw the coat onto the chair instead. And blinked. "You were fast."

It was a clinical observation made while his brain rebooted, and Gwen shrugged simply. "You, dear, took your time getting here."

"Ah - the freezer was acting up, as always. Gawain and I stayed behind to look it over."

The fluffed up former Queen could see it; black smudges of something were smeared into fabric and hair of the melancholy man alike. The machine had been doing worse for wear since roughly a year - they really needed to replace it soon.

With a spring in her step, Gwen closed the distance between them and stood on her toes to reach up to him, Lancelot's hands reflexively hovering around her waist. A wry grin formed as he leaned back. "I'm full of oil and frostings, my Lady."

He leaned down slightly, his mouth inches from hers, before he smiled and brushed their noses together.

Foreheads fell against each other.

They lingered in comfortable silence, before Lancelot leaned back again and Gwen stood down, righting the fluffy towel reflexively. "Then go and make yourself presentable, Sir Knight. I shall wait."

Lancelot grinned.

3. Lips - Shirou and Artoria

She had been eating some fruit on and off the whole day, while her and Shirou were going over the plans for the Garden Dinner of Extravaganza that his father had dragged them into, Kay and Rin long since already gone their own ways due to the sheer boredom of leafing through the pages and memorizing routines and foods and everything they were agreeing upon.

"Can't say that I blame them," Shirou muttered, jotting down notes. "I'd left yesterday already."

Artoria grinned. "You would, yes. Probably even before that." She looked over their eventual positions as servers/security, mentally assigning the Knights around. Her parents would need security, and some should be near the Queen, Royal Guards notwithstanding…

They lapsed into comfortable silence, Artoria categorically munching on the pears, until her hand found empty space.

She blinked, looking up from the provisional dinner suggestions (peppered skate was one of them), and saw the empty bowl next to her.

"Huh." She had been sure that there was at least another slice, if not two. There was a suspicious sound to her right, however.

Shirou smirked at her, the last slice suggestively hanging in his mouth.

"Well," Artoria calculated the distance between them, "two can play this game."

She leaned forward, capturing Shirou's lips in a short kiss, before she withdrew with a triumphant smirk and only the tiniest of blushes.

His lips tasted like pears.

He blinked, dumbfounded, as she ate her prized half of the slice, swallowing thickly. Artoria licked her lips.

4. Tip of Nose - Guinevere and Galahad

Gwen was intently watching Galahad as he took the chocolate cake out of the oven, a small notepad besides her, scribbled full.

The meringue was done already, and the ice cream was in the freezer.

It was a stupidly difficult recipe, really, and this was their third try of making the Baked Alaska - they had to send Lancelot to buy cream stiffener, cream of tartar and grated lemon rind, because they'd used up everything already.

The kitchen looked the part as well.

Both held their breath as Galahad prodded the cake.

"It's… done." His voice held no amount of small wonder - mostly because his last try had oozed out of the form - and he turned proudly to his sorta-mother/sister-in-law.

Gwen grinned cheekily. "Well done! …we look like a mess, though."

"…everything's a mess."

She shrugged, flicking some chocolate batter off his nose, before a mischievous glint entered her eyes.

Galahad went cross-eyed as she gave him a peck on the nose, smiling. "My dashing knight."

He grinned self-consciously.

5. Closed Eyelids - Guinevere and Artoria/ Rin and Sakura

"I am simply worried -" Gwen glanced around their living room.

Artoria laughed. "Guinevere, I will manage."

The former Queen was silent for a moment, blue eyes never leaving green, before her shoulders sagged in defeat. "…it will be strange, you know?"

It was barely a mutter, but Artoria understood.

"Yes. But it is for the better - I will be out of your and Lancelot's hair…"

Gwen snorted. "I can throw that right back at you, you know?"

A wry grin. "I do, yes." She sobered up. "But this place is simply too small for six, or even seven, people, and Galahad's been waiting for it longer than either of us." Pause. "And Mashu will be happy to have some reasonable money left after rent - she is working herself ragged right now."

"Well, Jacqueline is worried sick, but as long as Galahad stays with Lancelot or Mashu…" Gwen shrugged. It was hard for his mother to see him go out on his own, especially because Galahad was the youngest among them.

They would become a fairly strange family unit, once Artoria was out by the middle of summer.

Guinevere sighed again, closing her eyes softly. She had lived together with Artoria for the better part of six years (not counting Camelot), and letting go was hard.

The former King leaned forward, the brunette's hand clasped in her own, as her lips brushed warmly over the other's eyelids. "We had time to heal and mend," Artoria begun, squeezing their hands. "We had time to reconcile with our past and to make amends."

As much as possible, at least. Gwen opened her eyes, barely a sliver, as her other half of the coin continued.

"I think - now is the time to move forward. We all clung to each other out of a desperate need, at first. But there is no need to, anymore."

Blue eyes opened fully. A small smile made its way across her face. "True, that. I guess." Their hands separated. "But be sure to have a spare accommodation for me there, because I don't plan on suddenly-"

She paused for a second, and Artoria's face masked in polite confusion. Gwen's eyes glinted, and she smirked. "I won't suddenly give up my quality-hugging-rights; I worked too long on them!"

Artoria was yanked, spluttering and red-faced, into an embrace.

Sakura blinked. "He is what?"

Rin was grumbling. "We're finishing Tootsuki, so we've started looking for apartments or something, but I haven't found anything yet."

Sakura blinked again. "I understood that, Nee-san. The part after, please."

"Emiya-kun and Saber are going to live together."

"Huh." Another blink. "I always thought it would take him much longer…"

You aren't the only one, Rin thought.

With a sigh, she returned her attention to the discussion at hand. Sakura hummed. "You know," a tap on the table to catch the other's attention, "Medea and Rider both have to go back to Greece by the end of the month, but I was thinking about staying."

Rin blinked. "Really?"

Sakura shrugged with a soft smile. "I spent the past years with my new family; I'd like to get to know my old one a bit better, Nee-san."

Rin's face split into a grin. "We could go look for something together!"

The purple haired girl laughed and leaned over, giving a quick peck on the other's eyebrow. "That sounds great. But - we could stay in Rider's place, no? The rent is a little too much for me alone."

They lapsed into silence.

Rin mentally facepalmed.

"Suddenly all of my worries are moot… still, can we get a third person? Maybe?" She asked, thinking.

Sakura blinked.

"Well- it's just," blue eyes narrowed. "I think Lucina would like to, as well. She's been through a lot these past months, and decided to move out if possible."

"Of course." Sakura smiled softly. "The more the merrier, after all!"

6. (Top of) Hand - Artoria and Bedivere

The first time Bedivere did it, Artoria didn't think about it; it was after the accident and his argument with Lucina, and she'd thought he needed familiarity more than anything else.

Then he'd done it once or twice at work, when a little kid had asked nicely why only Gwen had gotten the 'knight's kiss'. Artoria had obliged, embarassed, holding out her hand in what felt like an unnatural move, and Bedivere had smiled softly at her and ghosted his lips over her knuckles.

Afterwards, it became more frequent.

Never was it done without good reason, but the reasons for Bedivere - or Lancelot, Gawain and even Kay and Mordred! - became more frequent, and Artoria more bewildered.

Gwen had chuckled at her once, when she'd mentioned in passing. "You are thick sometimes, you know?" Her eyes glinted with humor, and Artoria huffed silently.

She knew the meaning of the gesture, obviously - even without a signet ring or other emblem, the meaning was clear to her, why her Knights did it, but.

A sigh escaped the blonde as she was cleaning the tables upstairs, absentmindedly thinking her returning problem over. Even Shirou had grinned at her like an idiot before he'd done the …almost same gesture, minus the implied kissing and plus the actual kissing on the top of her hand, when she had mentioned it.

She'd blushed hard that time.

0:0:0:0

Bedivere was the last of them left, so closing shop fell to him and the King. "Your Majesty? I am finished down here."

A second passed, before she poked her head down from upstairs, nodding. "I will be with you in a minute."

He nodded with a smile.

0:0:0:0

Artoria seemed conflicted over something, Bedivere noted. She had her brows furrowed and her finger kept ghosting to her chin in an obvious attempt to hide it, but she still seemed confused.

"Is something the matter, Sire?"

"Ah," she blinked, glancing up at him. "No, everything is…" Halting mid-sentence, she looked at him strangely. "Why do you still insist on-"

A grimace followed, and the King waved her hand in front of her demonstratively. Bedivere took all of a second to decipher her meaning, before his smile softened.

It took another before it turned mischievous, mirroring Kay's favorite smirk in its intensity as he gently took a hold of her hand in his prosthetic one, bringing it to his lips with a soft mechanic sound. "Did you mean this, my Lord?" It was whispered against her hand, and she withdrew it slowly, with the same puzzled and complicated expression as always whenever he or any other Knight did it.

Bedivere would have liked to say it was because they were glad to be able to see this side of her (that she had hidden away for so long), or that they still were there for her and honored her and respected her (which she knew; he knew she did), or that it was a never-before seen privilege of showing their respect and admiration (she was the King, after all, and had been distant and cold and hard), but decided against it.

Instead he merely inclined his head oh-so-politely, a small smile on his features and only the faintest hint of concealed amusement in his eyes.

"I have not the faintest clue about what you are talking about, my Liege."

He could see her eye start to twitch.

7. Kiss on Cheeks - Mordred and Jekyll

The two of them were sitting on the Detective's couch, looking over the cases and files - Hyde had left them not even ten minutes ago, throwing his stack into the air with an exasperated yowl.

Not that Mordred blamed him. She was close to do so as well.

Jekyll glanced at her, smiling. "We're almost done?" He batted his eyelashes just for effect as well.

Mordred groaned. "How is it that Mr. Grumpy and Aggravated-"

Henry tried to hide his growing grin.

"-not only dumped all of his cross-filing onto us, but that our 'partners' have left us for the dogs, too?"

"Well, you know him."

She rolled her eyes. "Good for nothing, useless older brother."

"Ah, but you love him anyways."

She halted, deflating and fell backwards with a soft sigh. "Well, yeah." The former Knight of Treachery closed one eye. "But we're doing much better as a family now, than back then…"

The stack of papers was forgotten. Agravain could do them for himself, for once.

Mordred closed her second eye. "You're a great sorta-cousin, as well."

Jekyll let out a pitiful groan. "This again? Mordred, for the last time, I'm not related to you! He's our legal guardian-"

He held his hand to his cheek. The retreating back of Mordred's head could be seen in the door.

"It was a joke." She smirked. "Really, Jekee, lighten up for once."

Doctor Henry Jekyll stared. He stared some more.

"…wait. Mordred-"

"For fuck's sake, finally you can take a hint!" Edward was standing in the doorframe where Mordred had disappeared to, sipping away at his Capri-Sun with a grin.

8. Earlobe/Neck - Shirou and Artoria

"You know," he whispered, snuggling closer to her, "it's really nice that we managed to finish earlier."

Artoria snorted. "We left the stack of paper and the bowl lying on the kitchen table."

He snuggled even closer. "I don't care. My father's crazy."

"That, dear heart, is something we can agree on." She looked forward to it, but still. "Easter is approaching soon, and after the holidays the dinner is only a few weeks away." Artoria grimaced, poking Shirou in the ribs to make him move over.

"A new bed will be appreciated."

He laughed as he flipped around, the momentum taking her with him, until she was laying on top of him with a blush.

"A new of everything will be appreciated." His tone was warm as Shirou brushed through her hair, and she hummed as she closed her eyes. "We'll have to go shopping. To IKEA, or something."

Green eyes blinked up at warm, golden ones. "If we go to IKEA, we will be leaving with two times the amount of furniture and zero the amount of tolerance with which we entered. You know that."

He rolled his eyes. "I know, I know. I'm not stupid."

Her look said otherwise. Heaving herself up nimbly - until she was at eye-level with him - Artoria breathed a kiss. "You are. My stupid idiot."

His hands framed her face. "Hmm~" Softly turning her head, Shirou's lips ghosted over her jawline, trailing up to the tip of her ear.

The former King closed her eyes with a shudder.

Shirou gently nibbled at the earlobe, continuing the fluttery kisses and soft nips down her jaw and throat, and she went limp in his arms.

"Shirou…" A low moan threatened to escape.

"Hmm?" He sucked at the soft spot on her neck, smiling. "Yes, Saber?"

"…why, you…"

9. Air-Kiss - Galahad and Percival (and Bors)

It had started with a confused five-years-old asking why the older girls smacked their cheeks together. "Ah, that?"

His father glanced down at his only son in the bunch of kids. "It's their way of greeting each other."

Percy blinked. "But it's stupid!"

0:0:0:0

A seven-years-old Percy, now having grown accustomed to the strange tribal behavior of girls around him, watched as two of his classmates greeted each other with the same cheek-rubbing and air-kissing as always.

His eyes narrowed in contemplation.

(Later that day, when his Auntie Bea came visiting, he scrunched up his face and did the same, having observed women across all ages and TV programs do the greeting, and Beatrice beamed at him with a smile.)

0:0:0:0

Within the next few years, Percy grew accustomed to greet literally everyone (with the notable exception of Uncle Travis, who always avoided him like an expert) with the fabled air kiss of apparent universal Hello's; from female classmates to family friends.

(Strangely, the other boys in his class always looked at him in disgust, but the girls invited him to braid his hair and stuff like that, which he knew better than to disagree.)

0:0:0:0

Then Gabriel came to his class, all shy and one year younger than everyone else, and he was greeted enthusiastically by Percy, who forgot that boy's generally didn't like the 'mushy girly stuff'.

Gabriel blushed a pretty shade of red but didn't comment any other way, and Percy knew he would be a keeper.

0:0:0:0

He awoke shortly after.

0:0:0:0

Gabriel still was the only boy who let himself be greeted (albeit reluctantly) with the 'faire la bise' - Percival researched it - and the girls would giggle and do the same, and invite them for tea parties or, later, to hang out with, and the guys became green with envy.

Percival shrugged it off and scored with Gabriel's parents instead.

(He'd tried to do the same with Millie, when she came to their class, but she glared at him once and he shrunk back and apologized.)

0:0:0:0

By the time they reached secondary school, all three of them together, Mordred had revealed herself, and Galahad had awoken, and all three had found their way to the other Knights and the King and Queen.

Percival was glad and had smiled, and had quietly stopped to greet his new classmates with air-kisses, because apparently it was 'not proper' and 'strange', and his new classmates weren't all that nice anyway - but the ones that switched with them, or old ones he'd meet on the street would receive the same, over-enthusiastic greeting.

Galahad would roll his eyes at the ridiculousness of it all, glance at Mordred with whom he often arrived at the same time, but comply dutifully, holding out his cheek to be over with it.

Then Boris had joined his small but cozy group of friends, Mordred guessing he could be Bors because hey, all of them were years apart now, so why not? Both were silent and more secluded than open, and Percival took a shining to him regardless if it was their old brother-in-arms or not.

(He'd tried to introduce Boris to the wonder of the cheek-air-kiss, but his effort was evaded with a well-placed hand the first time, and the time after by ducking out of the way. It became a personal game between the silent Boris and energetic Percival, to see if the latter would finally succeed once.

This far, he had a good twenty five percent chance of managing.)

0:0:0:0

Bors awoke, and the game became a battle of wits and strategy, and Percival's winning chance dropped to ten percent, and disappeared soon after.

0:0:0:0

The years after were filled with school and work and singling out true friends from fake ones, and the air-kiss became a privilege to only a few at school: the twin-daughters of his neighbor, a girl he'd gone to preschool with and was in class ever since, a good friend of his sister's, and of course, Galahad.

(Mordred would glare at him as he was hiding behind previously-mentioned classmate, once again having tried his luck with her. Bors shook his head slowly. He'd learn his lesson once, eventually. Maybe.)

0:0:0:0

Galahad had - sometime between meeting Bors and beginning to work in the cafe - given up on silently dissuading Percival about invading his personal space and started participating in their silly morning rituals with varied enthusiasm.

(Once, he'd blown air into the redhead's ear, after Percival rubbed their cheeks together delightfully. He was really, really, really shocked at that, shuddering away, and Galahad found himself under fire that lunch period. Never again.)

0:0:0:0

Ann blinked as her brother greeted Gabriel by the door. Left cheek, right cheek -

Her only male sibling flung his arm around the other's neck, dragging the silent teen behind him to his room.

She blinked after him again, as he suddenly ran past her to the kitchen.

"What-"

"Sosorryforgotthedogsoutside'kaythanksbye!"

Shaking her head at his antics, she glanced into his room, where Gabriel waited. Their glances held each other for barely a second, but both rolled their eyes.

"Really, I can see that you're uncomfortable with it, so why do you still let him do it?"

Gabriel shrugged. "He's always done it anyhow." A mischievous smirk. "And it's not as if I could take away his privilege, when the other two did already."

Ann thought back a few years, to reluctant nods and looks of defeat and slight blushes and wary glances. "But you didn't like it; still don't like it?"

Gabriel shrugged again, very softly, and looked at the open history book on the bed. "It's okay."

10. Hair - Agravain and Jack

The little assassin-slash-girl was walking towards a run-down building, a bag of microwaveable food and other knickknacks in her rucksack and bags, whistling a jaunty tune to herself.

Jack looked subtly around, making sure that no-one followed her, before she slipped into the building.

The interior revealed boxes stacked systematically around to create cabinets and other cases, the broken windows and holes were taped over with covers, and pieces of broken furniture created the idea of chairs and tables and other necessities.

It was the main local hangout of the homeless network Henry, Edward, Hans, Alice and she had created for/with Agravain, and right now it was pay day.

Jules grinned at her as she entered a side room, already lighting the stove to warm up the milk she'd brought them today.

It was gas operated, though most electronics they had around were battery operated, like the lamps they used, or the old heater.

"Ana really appreciated your help last week," Jack informed him. She'd mostly brought food and water, but there was a packet of medicine in her bag from Boudicca and Dagonet for one of Jules' wards.

The eyes of Agravain's private network stretched all the way across London to even partially Winchester, and the gruff assassin called them his 'spymaster's goons' or 'street rats/urchins', but Jack knew he cared about them enough to give them a secure blanket or inform them of imminent police raids on places courtesy of Palomedes.

Jules Verne shrugged. "It was our pleasure to help Agravain, as always."

Jack nodded.

0:0:0:0

"You visited the street urchins again?"

Agravain poured himself some coffee as he heard the door opening.

Jack nodded and eased herself into the table next to him. He wordlessly slid the coffee over and went to making himself a new one. "I hope you had some sense to be cautious?"

Jack wordlessly pulled out a small knife from a hidden pocket somewhere, and slid it across the table while she cherished the warm drink.

"And I looked left and right," she added.

Agravain nodded, ignoring the ungodly hour both of them were awake at - three in the morning - in favor of opening the fridge. "You want something?"

Jack shook her head.

Closing the fridge, he drank his coffee, walking past Jack. "I'm going to the Police Station, have to do something. There's leftover chicken from dinner if you'd like."

He stopped. "And, well-" only for a second, as if any longer and he'd burn his hand, Agravain put his hand on Jack's head, and ruffled trough her hair. "Good work."

Jack smiled into her own cup as she heard the door fall closed.

Otherwise known as Artoria and Gwen try their hands at being parents, Rin and Sakura have sisterly bonding, Percival's an overly affectionate and energetic puppy, Shirou and Artoria push towards the Boundaries of Rating and Agravain manages. Sorta. Maybe.

Also, Bedivere has fun at the expense of his King and Merlin is seldom serious.

Otherwise known as what is the first (and as of now, only) side story to Café of the Round, unless my imagination decides to run wild with me again (But it's double the length, so…)

Might become a compilation of side stories in the future, if I decide to write something that doesn't work with the format again (like another challenge, or short introspection or something like that).

Other than that,

until next time in CotR!