*Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise, 'It's a Wonderful Life', or 'The Greatest Gift.'

*Author's Notes: Just in time for the holidays, I've returned with a new installment of 'Because You Weren't There.'

While this story was a Christmas present to a very dear friend of mine (Captain Vegeta), this particular chapter was written specifically for my father. I love you very, very much, daddy! Thank you for getting me addicted to 'It's a Wonderful Life' all those years ago. Watching the movie, over and over again, with you is one of my fondest childhood memories. I loved the movie back then, but I love it even more now that I'm all 'grown up' and fully understand the true meaning behind this inspirational film.

I really hope you all enjoy the chapter. Thank you for reading. ;) CJ

Epilogue – Attaboy, Mikey

There are certain, dare I say, perks associated with near-death experiences. I like to refer to them as sympathy pains.

After being critically injured, the wounded party is entitled to a number of special privileges they normally wouldn't receive had their life not been hanging by a thread. Privileges my baby brother oftentimes milks like dairy cattle. I, on the other hand, try to be a little less needy and a lot less melodramatic about the whole thing. Rather than run the risk of overplaying my hand, I ask for small, modest favors here and there. Humble requests, such as fetching me a glass of water or a couple of aspirin. Or, in this case, asking my family to sit down and watch a movie with me.

I mean, how could they possibly say no to something as simple as that, right?

Especially at a time like this.

It's Christmas, after all. Not to mention I almost died.

Okay, who's the melodramatic one now?

Anyway, I digress…

My point is, these unspoken 'privileges' were the only way I was ever going to get my entire family to suffer through a two hour and fifteen-minute, black and white film. A film that contains no cussing, no gore, no graphic violence, no inappropriate content – just pure, wholesome goodness. In other words, I exploited my family's kindness and subjected them to a movie they would've never, in a million years, watched voluntarily. And now that the end credits are scrolling up the screen to the tinny-sounding tune of 'Buffalo Gals,' I'm feeling a teeny, tiny bit guilty for taking advantage of the very people I supposedly love the most in this world. It certainly doesn't help that Mikey is staring up at me with his huge, dewy blue eyes; a Santa hat flopped to one side.

It's times like this, I wish I wasn't cursed with a conscience. Things would be so much easier if I didn't have a sense of what's right or wrong.

Kind of like Raph…

"I'm confused."

Just as I open my mouth to ask my little brother 'why,' my oldest brother beats me to the punch.

"About what, Mikey? The fact that the cop just started open-firing at an unarmed man right in the middle of a crowded street?"

Leave it to straight-as-an-arrow Leonardo to notice something like that.

Need I point out this is the same turtle who's always willing to overlook his precious Captain Ryan's obvious ethical shortcomings?

I'm just saying – or rather, just thinking…

"No. No, not that." Mikey shakes his head from side to side and wrinkles up his beak in what I assume is contemplation. Of course, it could just as soon be that he bit his tongue. It's hard to tell with my baby brother. His train of thought shifts like the sea.

Looking confident he knows the answer, Raph takes the next stab at guessing what's got Mikey so baffled.

"Because George didn't kick the crap out of his brother for constantly giving him the short end of the stick? Some brother Harry was. Always taking what was rightfully George's and stealing his thunder, like George was beneath him. What a selfish jerk!"

I can't help but notice my two older brothers lock heated glares, as though silently accusing each other of something.

Clearly, Raphael's guess was intended to be a dig at Leo, but as usual, Mikey is totally oblivious to the fleeting moment of tension.

"Nope. That's not it, either."

Lips twisting into what can only be described as a sneer, April looks over at Mikey with a smolder in her eyes.

Not a good kind of smolder.

"Maybe it's the ridiculous notion that Mary became a frightened old maid just because George was never born. Like her entire life revolved around the existence of one guy. Not to mention they made it seem like being a single, working class woman was the worst possible fate imaginable! Puh-leeeeease! The movie probably set feminism back twenty years or more."

As much as I adore April, there are times when she out-and-out scares me.

Take right now, for instance…

She's currently scowling at us as though we're her sworn enemies.

It's enough to make a grown turtle shake in his shell. In fact, I can actually hear Mikey's teeth chattering. April must hear them, too, because her features suddenly soften into something a little less homicidal. Only then does my younger brother feel as if it's safe to answer, but not before gulping so loud, it seems to echo throughout the lair.

"N – No."

Three up, three down.

I suppose this technically makes it my turn to wager a guess, since Master Splinter doesn't appear to be the least bit interested in the conversation.

Well, here goes nothing…

"Okay, okay! I've got it! I bet it's because a movie extolling the value of friendship ends with a song that contains the lyrics 'Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind?' Talk about sending mixed signals. Am I right?"

I can practically hear crickets chirping in the background as they all stare at me with glassy eyes, like I just spoke in some foreign language.

I get this look a lot...

"You know? 'Auld Lang Syne?' The famous Scots poem written by – " I stop myself mid-sentence when I realize I'm only digging the hole deeper. No point in boring them out of their skulls with some long-winded, highbrow answer when I could save myself the breath and just cut to the chase. "Nevermind. Why don't you just tell us what you're confused about, Mikey?"

All eyes are now on my baby brother and his freckled face instantly takes on a bright, rosy glow. Whether his blushing is from embarrassment or too much of that funky tasting eggnog Raph brought home, I'll never know.

"Well, I guess I just don't get why some dude never being born made it stop snowing. That didn't make any sense."

I can't stop a huge grin from crossing my face.

Mikey never ceases to amaze me. Just when you think you've got him all figured out, he does a complete one-eighty on you. He's a bit of a mystery, the little goofball. Behind that happy-go-lucky exterior, there lies something much, much deeper, that despite all my intelligence, I'll never truly be able to understand.

But that's okay. If there's anything I've learned this Christmas season, it's that things don't always have to make sense.

Especially when you're suffering from the lingering effects of a nasty concussion…

The End

*More Author's Notes: Short and sweet, just like Mikey.

I hope you all have a magical holiday season and an extraordinary new year. Huge thanks to each and every one of you for the kindness you have shown me and for being so wonderful.

If you enjoyed this story or any of my other ones, please take a moment to favorite, follow, like, reblog, review, and/or comment. Your positive feedback always makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Thanks so much for reading, everyone. ⊂(ᴖ◡ᴖ)つ

CJ