AN: Hello again, it's been a while. I'm sorry that I haven't been uploading for the last year. Life decided it wanted to give a good go at kicking my ass, and that's all I think I'll say on the matter. I still feel like I've let you down, with not saying anything, but I hope you can forgive me for that. Anyway. I'm trying to get back to normal, in life and with my writing. I don't want to promise I'll regularly update, even with how long it was between each chapter, but I will make an effort to do so. And I hope you can still enjoy my story.

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Deadly Affection – Reimagined

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of it's characters. I just make them do silly stuff.

Chapter 25: Life moves on

Bella PoV

''We really need to work on your dissing skills, young padawan.'' Came the rumbling voice of Emmett, just as we sat down with our trays. I felt a little confused by that, with how he had acted. ''I mean, you made a valid point, sort of. But I'm not sure if asking when someone feels hypocritical can be qualified as an insult.'' He gave an apologetic smile, before he returned to fake-eating a piece of bread that just happened to fall back down on his plate. An egotistical part of me was grateful that Edward wasn't sitting with us.

That certainly popped the semi-proud bubble that had been keeping my spirits high the last few classes. I guess I understand why Alice sent Emmett now. It probably wouldn't have mattered much what I had said to that asshat, the crowd still would have followed the crowd-mentality of a big popular dude taunting someone of lesser standing. Damn tribal programming.

The chill of Alice's hand brushing over my shoulder to rest at the base of my neck distracted me long enough to realize that I was getting stuck in my own head again. ''I for one, think you did an excellent job of explaining to Jessica why she shouldn't feel guilty about her feelings.'' She said with a smile as the aforementioned hand started slowly gliding down my back. Goosebumps erupted down my arms as her hand came to a stop between my shoulders.

''Maybe not do that when everyone is watching sis?'' Rosalie said quietly. Emmett whispered something into her ear, which earned him a slap on the shoulder.

''Whatever do you mean, dear sister?'' Alice shot back with a wry smile. I just waved my hand at Rosalie, indicating I didn't mind. Which only emboldened Alice further, gently tugging on the strap of my bra through my shirt. It elicited something of a shock in my mind, despite the sensation being subtle. I turned to stare at her smiling face, and gently shook my head. The smile abated slightly, as she stopped teasing. Her hand however, stayed at my back, and everyone at the table suddenly found the surrounding students very interesting.

I proceeded to eat some food in the interim, thankful that Rosalie hadn't commented on it. I had told Alice that I wanted to move slowly, but maybe the pace I had in mind was different from what Alice thought.

Putting myself in her shoes, I can see how it might be frustrating. She's been alive for long enough to have seen a day where everyone had to be prim and proper, where you couldn't really express yourself in public. Only to see society inch closer to the day where we can be who we want to be, whereever we might be. To be free. It must seem to be going so slow as to be a kind of torture. And in a household full of similarly aged and even older individuals, the need to feel embarrassed would probably evaporate. Not to mention being able to hear everything that everyone did in the house at all times. Mostly, anyway. This was nothing in comparison.

I felt prudish for having such a reaction to what was simply teasing on Alice's part. Yet I felt like I shouldn't apologize for it. Bottling it up it is then. No need to brood on the matter. I snuck a glance at her as I ate, giving her a coy smile. She seemed to take the hint, as she started rubbing my back gently.

''So what do you think I should have hit back with, Emmett?'' I asked him, bringing us back to the earlier topic.

A feral grin appeared on his face as he turned to me. ''You should have gone for his manliness. It's every insecure guys weakpoint!'' He said in a loud whisper, as if he was letting me in on a secret.

''That's quite literally what got me sent up here in the first place.'' I pointed out, and he only grinned wider.

''I know. You should have kept the streak going! If people know you to be ruthless, they would be less inclined to mess with you from the start.'' Emmett replied with a smile, as if that was a good thing.

''That would alienate the good people too, not just the bad ones. And I don't want people to dislike me.'' I retort, feeling a little hypocritical. While I did want people to like me, with my current predicament I also didn't want people to get too close to me. Human people at least.

''Then why did you chose to be hostile back in Phoenix?'' Rosalie asked, seemingly very interested all of a sudden. It's kinda unnerving how her bilateral thinking makes me question my own motives more than I'd prefer. It almost felt as if she's trying to understand how I'll react to different stimuli.

''I suppose it was because I lost my cool after Justin insulted my best friend. In hindsight, I'm not sure I'd do the same thing again. I had no idea of the damage I could do, back then.'' I answer as best as I can. Alice's fingers grip mine a little tighter at the implication.

''Sometimes we have to cause harm, in order to preserve order.'' Jasper chimed it, looking off to the side. It felt... unlike him. He has always seemed to be conscientious, but the sense of right and wrong in this case seemed to be archaic. Yes, he said it to defend me, but it felt as if there was something else behind it.

''And doing so often disrupts the order you try to preserve. In all your years, have you ever seen a peaceful revolution? And when has a revolution ever started, if not in the attempt to right injustice?'' I might not be an expert in history, but that seemed to be a consistent cause. Unless everything could be blamed on supernatural fuckers vying for power, controlling the masses from behind the scenes. Which I guess isn't impossible.

The table went silent for a bit at that, with Jasper not acknowledging my response in any visible way. I just continued eating, and leaned into Alice's hand as she found a knot in my back, and proceeded to massage it.

''Would you say that the reason for your regret is due to your new... situation, or because of the consequences of the action you took?'' Rosalie prodded further, trying intently to catch my eyes. I had to look away as I considered the question.

''I don't like to cause harm. I did want to hurt him, if only to stop his attack on me. Or I'd like to claim as such, but that might just be me trying to excuse my own behavior. Anyway, it seems to have worked out for the best, so why does it matter?'' I answer, starting to feel like she's being a little too nosy. I half-expected the familiar tingle to rise up my spine along with some irritation, but that was strikingly absent as well. I guess I can see where she's coming from, given her instincts to defend her family.

''The best way to know ourselves is to understand why we act the way we do. And if you know what makes you tick, it will be easier to see if you're being influenced by something external. Or internal, in your case.'' Rosalie responded, her stoic demeanor melting into one of kindness.

I felt a pang of guilt for thinking ill of her intentions at the same time as I felt really happy at the implication. She wants to protect me as well. I had to suppress the strength bubbling beneath the surface, but that didn't stop me from smiling.

''You seem to be wise beyond your years, Rosalie.'' I teased with a chuckle, genuinely meaning it. She wasn't as old as the rest of them, with her and Emmett actually being the youngest. Sort of. Alice has technically been a vampire the least amount of time, so in that sense she is younger, even if the total amount of years spent on this earth is higher.

''What can I say? Don't let the blonde hair fool you.'' She threw back with a smile, continuing to pick apart her food like the rest of her siblings. I would have pointed out the cosmic imbalance again, but thought better of it, as Alice's hand continued to work wonders on my back. For the moment, I felt genuinely happy. Like I belonged.

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In biology, it quickly became apparent that Edward was back to his broody self again, despite the turmoil the last time we spoke. Then again, not speaking isn't really confirmation that he's not pissed at me any more than it disproves the notion. I guess it was up to a coinflip how he would respond if I initiated a conversation.

''Just don't.'' He whispered loud enough for me to hear, trying to stop the conversation before it started. Well that just wouldn't do, would it. I really want to have a little chat about someone blowing things way out of proportions for no apparent reason whatsoever. Doesn't that sound fun? I found some perverse joy in seeing the scowl emerge on his face.

''That person would like to first point out that you had no idea that her visions could come back.'' He whispered with venom, and the guy in front of us turned his head slightly.

I felt properly deflated by his rebuttal, as there was no way I could contest the claim. I had opted to trust Alice, but even she was likely just trusting it would come back. Though she had implied that she could sense her power in some way. But how can you feel the absence of something? If he bothered listening to my musings I couldn't tell, but he made no attempt to make it clear. Guess we can both sit here and feel annoyed together.

And so I chose to focus on the teacher, and tried my best to be engaged in the lesson. Keyword being tried. I could feel when I wasn't powered up, right. Wouldn't this be the same? No... for it to be the same I'd have to be able to feel that I couldn't power up. And even just when I'm low on energy, I'm not able to tell unless I try to use it. But her being a vampire has to count right? Maybe if I had some more acute feeling for what my power was, I could feel the lack of it. But even then, it's far off from being able to feel it's gone, to knowing that it could come back. What if what I did erased vampires extra abilities? No one would be able to tell that before it happened the first time. The first analogue that comes to mind is Rogue, even if it doesn't fit perfectly. She just temporarily borrows powers. Though, she does also hurt them in the process, so that was kinda similar. Not that I apparently needed to drain Alice's energy to cut off her powers.

I had a quiet chuckle at comparing myself to a comic-book character non-ironically. It really was kinda wild how much my world had changed. Or at least my view of it.

Anyway, with what I had learned of my abilities so far, the red cloak takes stuff, while the blue one can give stuff. I wasn't sure if it was mutually exclusive yet one way or another, but that was what I had learned so far. So why would the blue cloak take away her ability to see the future, if what was special about it was that I could give away energy. Or life force. Or whatever it was that I could control. And why didn't the red cloak do the same, if it was based on the same kind of power.

Firstly my abilities and Alice's visions would have to be on the same wavelength or something, as they seemed to be able to interact with each other. And... An uncomfortable flashback to the first day in Forks entered my mind. Seeing Alice, up in the tree near the diner. It was blinding to look upon her. Was it possible that it worked in reverse somehow? That when I powered up, I blinded her ability to see the future, or in some way mirrored the effect? But why wouldn't it happen when I went red? Was it tied to the way the two powers manipulated energy?

Could that be it? Did the energy I can wield overwhelm whatever extrasensory... sensor, it was that allowed Alice to see visions? That would mean I give off energy when I go blue. But I can't remember seeing any energy flowing off of me at the time. Then again, my second sight changed when I went blue. I really should test it out more. I'd have to figure out if it could interfere with Alice's vision at a distance first though. Then again, Edward wasn't affected by it like Alice was, even from outside the door when it happened the first time. So maybe it was a direct line of sight sort of thing? That is assuming their abilities are rooted in the same kind of... sensor. Sensing organ? I wonder if Carlisle has any idea, being a doctor. Probably hasn't operated on vampires though. Unless it's just silly magic, because vampire. That would be a lame.

My eyes turned to Edward, who was listening in if his vacant stare was any indication. Want to help me test out the hypothesis? I say to him in my mind, only for him to sneer in my direction.

''What? So you can figure out how to take away the last ability we have to know your true intentions?!'' His harsh whisper is too loud to not be heard, a confirmation of which comes not a second later.

CLACK! ''Mr. Cullen! Do I need to split you and Ms. Swan up?'' Mr. Molina asks loudly, having smacked his chalk into the blackboard. I feel the Swan blush emerge as most of the students turn to look at us. Damn hyper aggressive irrational vampires.

Edward looks furiously at the poor chap, before he calms his expression. ''No, Mr. Molina.'' he responds coolly, returning his attention to the front of the room. I try my best to shake of the shock, and do the same. Edward did sort of have a point though. If I was out to betray them, that would be a clever way to go about it.

''Good. Then pay attention, both of you!'' Mr. Molina demands, before restarting the lecture.

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I remembered Alice's warning as I headed for gym, that Mike would try to ambush me on the way. Which was kinda weird, as he was in the biology class with me, but he walked out before I did, and didn't wait. Maybe he had to go get something from his locker? Who knows. I guess, as she did warn me, I had a chance to get away. But it got me curious as to what he would say. Why would Alice not want me to talk to him? And surely he'd just ambush me later down the road and tell me the same thing then, if he wasn't able to now. So what was the big deal?

With that in mind, I didn't hurry on my way, leaving it up to chance if he got to me or not. And what do you know, he was waiting for me just outside the locker rooms. Setting up to ambush me here gave the clear indication that he didn't want any Cullen's to interrupt though. None of them were even close enough for my baseline second sight to see. Which would mean Alice wasn't directly spying, and that would suggest it wasn't anything directly horrible. Right?

Feeling just slightly anxious, I meet his gaze and walk over to him, standing outside the girl's lockers, with his hands behind his back. With a bunch of... flowers, in his hands. Oh please save me Alice. I wanted to just not be here anymore. I briefly wondered if he would take the hint if I just smacked the door open in his face and left him there. But that would be cruel.

So I handled it the way I did most things. Straight forwards and into the thick of it. I just hoped he wouldn't be a new Justin in my life. Maybe that's why Alice warned me. With that in mind, I slowed to a halt and raised a hand to halt him, his smile dropping as soon as I did.

''Look, Mike. I've tried to hint to this before, so let me just be blunt now. You're a kind and handsome guy, but you're not what I'm looking for. I'm not some object that can be won over by flowers.'' I say, motioning towards the bouquet behind him. His jaw drops for a moment, before he flusters with indignation.

''I've never said you were an object!'' He protests, his hands dropping to his sides. The flowers in his hand are common wild ones that I've seen around the school grounds.

''No, but you're acting like it. Tell me, why now? Because Alice gave me flowers yesterday, right?'' I ask rhetorically, before letting the annoyance drain from me, focusing on a certain little pixie in my mind. The cold pressure simmers beneath the surface, but I make sure it's not so close as to change my eyes. ''I didn't say that to be mean to you Mike, but maybe you should take a step back and examine why you are interested in me. Is it because I'm the new girl and you want to sweep me off my feet, or is it because you like me as a person?''

His face turns from anger to dejection as he seems to start to think about it, before a streak of defiance gives him new vigor. ''How can you claim to be any better, knowing you're splitting up Jasper and Alice in the process?'' Mike declares, as if he's found a little diamond that would disprove my point. All it does is further prove that he doesn't see me as a person.

I wanted to point out the fact that Jasper sat with us at lunch today as proof to his mistake in the matter, but I refrained. This wasn't an argument. ''That rumor is just not true, not that it matters in this case. Please consider my words.'' I say as kindly as I can, not wanting to agitate him further. Not that it works anyway, seeing as he throws the flowers to the ground in anger.

''Damnit Bella, I just don't want you to feel like you don't have an option that's more natural.'' He manages to say, causing me to feel pain radiating from my chest as I grit my teeth in anger. The fucking temerity! It feels like fire, spreading out my body as the fury threatens to overtake my previous calmness. The gall to even spout such shit! He's doing me a favor? Are you for fucking real?! The bile that threatens to spew forth fueled by the passive oppression that caused me not to want to admit to being gay in the first place.

I don't want to be angry. I don't need to be. I've got Alice.

Hissing through the pain, I focus on her. She's standing just around the corner now, waiting. Mike speaks, but I don't listen. I remember to close my eyes finally, as I try to purge the anger from my thoughts. Taking a deep breath, I see Alice smile to herself, as the last of my fury leaves me with the exhale.

I rose back up, having hunched down in pain. ''Bella?'' Mike asks, but I focus on gathering myself and coming up with a response that did not include violence. I want to poke him in the chest to punctuate my anger with my response, but I know that if I do, I might hurt him.

''I'm going to try to forget you uttered those words. And I hope you spend some time to reflect on them.'' I offer him no chance for him to reply. ''For your information, homosexuality is not unnatural. It occurs everywhere in nature. Look up the evidence presented by the American Psychiatric Association in the supreme court case Lawrence v. Texas if you don't believe me.''

He tried to form words in the short interlude, but I continued on. ''Furthermore, Alice is the best thing that's happened to me in a good long while, thank you very much. So any notion you've gotten to try to meddle in my life, you better disabuse yourself of it.'' I didn't give him the time to respond, opting to take myself out of the equation by entering the locker room. Even trying to be gentle with the handle, it took damage.

Not having him in my line of sight released the last remnants of anger in me, but this new situation I saw infront of me didn't really bode well for my sanity.

The door closing behind me broke the silence that permeated the room, all the girls staring at me as I stood there like a deer in the headlights. This was one problem I hadn't expected. My secret was out now. Would they be hostile? I mean, I did change with them yesterday without issue. Maybe two periods wasn't enough time for the news to spread, but now it most certainly had.

''What do you think you're doing?'' One of the girls asked all haughty like. Lauren, if memory serves, having had to listen to her inane babble, trying to flirt with Tyler during lunch a few times.

''I think I'm changing for class. What did you think I was doing?'' I replied, baiting her to spew her shit. I had been expecting some blowback, but this was starting to be a bit much.

''We don't want to change with no dyke in the room.'' She hissed, though none of the other girls seemed too anxious to voice any agreement. They were probably feeling a little conflicted about it, but at least they didn't actively try to make me feel like shit. So I'd try my best not to make them feel uncomfortable in return.

''Well it's not as if I've suddenly turned gay, Lauren. But don't worry, there hasn't been any cold showers on your account.'' I joked, walking over to the corner in the back to give the others some space. The sputtering of Lauren seemed to have amused Alice as well, as I could see her laughing on the other side of the wall.

''You should go to class Alice, or you'll be late.'' I utter a touch less loudly, not that Lauren seemed to miss it. She rounded the corner as Alice started moving away from us, looking ready to throw down.

''What was that, dyke?'' Lauren spat, narrowly missing me with any stray strands of saliva.

''Oh nothing for you to worry about, Lauren. I was just talking to my gay fantasy BFF.'' The sickly sweet smile I felt split my face almost made me nervous that I was exhibiting some of my power. But the way she backed up looked more like disgust than fear.

I decided not to worry about it and started changing into my gym clothes, still feeling upbeat, even if I probably should be slighty angry. But what was the point in dwelling on that, when I could feel happy instead. There was no more issues in from any of the girls, and I let them change and leave before following them out.

I noticed Mike was missing as Coach started to call our names. I hope he doesn't start another mess for me like Justin did. Mike didn't strike me as that kind of person though, so I had hope he would get over it.

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There was no incidents when leaving the class, though I didn't use the shower and changed before the others got undressed. If only because they waited for me to leave before they undressed. I briefly wondered if I could ask Coach if I could get my own room to change in, but I dismissed it. It wouldn't be the same as letting people like Lauren win, it would me being the bigger woman. But bigots like her would see it as a win all the same.

The fact that I had left sort of early meant there weren't a lot of kids around, but I didn't mind it much as I got to the parking lot, seeing the Cullens standing by Edward's car. Well, Alice standing by the car, the rest of them seated, waiting to leave. I pretended I didn't see it, as I walked over to Alice's yellow Porsche on the other end of the lot. A smile crept onto my lips as she started stalking towards me.

''So I'm just your fantasy friend now, huh?'' Alice asked as she snuck up on me just as I got to stand beside passenger door. I spun around to see her invading my personal space, backing off a step in surprise. Her energy was vibrant, intoxicating. I almost felt the need to ask what she was talking about when I remembered.

Blinking rapidly, I set to match her mischievious tone. ''Well, you are dreamy, Alice.'' In the back of my mind, I was surprised by the lack of the usual foot-in-the-mouth stuttering. I became tense as Alice stepped closer to me, staring into my eyes. Instinctually, I stepped back, only to bump into the side of the car.

Her golden eyes dropped to look at my lips as she placed her arms on each side of me, trapping me in place. My mind felt like it was swimming. It almost felt as if I wasn't inside my own skin. Like a bystander. Expectant.

''Quite the charmer, aren't you.'' Alice whispered, licking her lips. Or was that me. The knot in my stomach was getting uncomfortably loud. Yet I didn't dare breathe, in fear it would break the moment.

It only increased in volume as Alice started tilting up on her toes, getting ever closer. My head was pounding, as I could almost feel her lips ghosting over mine. Only to trail sideways, along my cheek.

''Bella.'' I could barely hear her, though the air from her lips was like ice on my skin. My eyes closed in response. I could feel the chill of her skin next to mine as she halted. Longer than I wanted. Shorter than I'd hoped. ''Say the word.'' I could feel pressure in the back of my mind spilling out.

I could feel her breath on my earlobe. ''Beg.''

Then her breath was gone for a minute, switched out by the sound of her taking a deep breath. I was going to say it. I wanted to. I needed to. But in a flurry of motion, the spell was broken. I only regained my senses as Alice had moved us to the far side of her car. Her eyes were black as night and both her hands were cupping my face. I leaned forward, mind filled with need. She retreated as I did so, confusing me.

''Bella, you're glowing! You need to pull it back!'' The urgent tone expelled the remaining funk from my head, and panic sets in. I pressed into the car. Hard. The hand break squeaks in protest, making me halt my retreat.

It takes a second to gather my wits before I focus on pulling the power back into myself. The ambient glow faded within seconds, but it was a few more before I felt sure it wouldn't reemerge. Alice was peaking out into the parking lot as I stood up fully, checking out the other students to see if anyone had noticed. At a quick glance I didn't find anyone staring in our general direction. Nor was anyone panicking or running away.

''Do you think anyone noticed?'' I asked her nervously. The pressing use of her abilities, which I had likely rendered unusable by now, enlightened me on why Edward made such a fuss. It sure would be handy at this point.

I noticed the Volvo parked on the side of the road near the entrance to the parking lot. None of it's occupants had left the car, which led me to believe Edward was trying to ferret out if anyone saw me lighting up in broad daylight. Unless I fucked up his ability as well, which I think was unlikely given prior circumstances.

Alice's phone gave a sharp little beep, startling us both. She gave one last glance out towards the other students, before she opened it and read what I guessed was a text from Edward, based on his car slowly driving away.

''Edward says none of the students noticed, thank God.'' She breathed a sigh of relief, putting the phone back in her pocket. Even though I feel most of the tension leave me, a knot has formed in my stomach.

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AN: You know the drill. If anything seems off, or if you have any concerns, please voice them.