The seventh time that Natsu found himself standing outside the sex shop, it was because of Lucy. It had been a week since he'd set foot in the shop. He'd been prepared to just never step foot in the place again, but Lucy tried to get him to go with her again, and once she'd seen the color drain out of his face, she'd been like a dog with a bone. There was no way she was letting it go. He'd explained what happened last time and how he'd just humiliated himself and Lucy just gave out a quiet 'hmmm' and called Erza. Natsu didn't get the phone out of her hands until it was too late and Jellal picked up the phone sounding winded, something Natsu had never heard in all of the three years he'd known him.

"Hello?"

Natsu nearly hung up, but Lucy snatched her phone back. "Erza!" she greeted cheerfully into the phone.

"No," came the breathless reply, "Erza is… busy." There was a rustling sound and then a pained yet muffled noise from Jellal on the phone. Lucy blushed crimson. Still, she did not hang up the phone.

"Erza said you work at the shop with Gray, right?" she asked, kicking at Natsu's stomach as he tried to reach for the phone to hang up.

Jellal's breathing was irregular and he spoke in clipped sentences, "Yes, why?"

Lucy put the phone on speaker and held it out away from Natsu as she extended her arm as far as she could, yelling, "So what does Gray think about Natsu?"

Natsu's struggling abruptly halted and he listened with bated breath even as his cheeks tinged bright fuscia when there was a muffled groan on the other end of the line.

"Asked," Jellal started, pausing to breathe in sharply, "Where he's been lately."

Lucy smiled triumphantly and Natsu stared at the phone with wide eyes.

"Does he ask about a lot of the customers?" Lucy asked.

Two moans that neither person on the other line bothered covering up and then, "No," right before the line went dead.

Both Lucy and Natsu were decidedly uncomfortable with what they'd heard, but Lucy grinned victoriously and declared that she would be taking Natsu to the sex shop and that she would wait outside and that he would not be coming outside until he had either a date or Gray's phone number. Preferably both. She also said that if he didn't get the phone number she would be marching in to ask Gray if Natsu actually asked him out because she wasn't letting him back out of this.

Because of the phone call, Natsu felt the tiniest bit of confidence as he entered the shop. He didn't see Gray at the counter, but he heard rummaging sounds from behind it so he assumed the man was somewhere behind it searching for something. He walked forward and tried to calm his pounding heart. Gray asked about you. He noticed when you weren't there! You might have a shot after all. You can ask him out and get a date and-

All thoughts of confidence and asking anyone out flew out the window when Gray popped out from behind the counter wearing no shirt and exposing two nipple piercings.

Natsu immediately turned right and practically skated into the furthest stall to hide. The store was practically empty and for that Natsu thanked the gods because if anyone saw that you would keel over and die of the embarrassment. He probably saw you running away from him into this aisle, you idiot!

Then Natsu stopped for a moment to look at his surroundings and any crumb of composure he might have had left disintegrated into dust because the aisle he'd run into was the… the…. The sight of shelves upon shelves of dildos froze Natsu entirely. You… you walked into… into….

He couldn't even finish the thought, eyes wide and unblinking at the sheer number of artificial appendages in neat rows.

Gray had been looking for the cleaning products so that he could get the coffee stain out of the shirt he'd worn to work today. Some woman had been pushed forward in the line earlier in the day and the result had been a very soaked and very angry Gray in a wet button up shirt. He'd waited for the rest of the customers to pay for their items and leave before he took his shirt off because he just knew they would find some excuse to linger if he took it off beforehand and he was not in the mood. Of course, Jellal had finished the cleaning products because he was a silent perfectionist and Gray was starting to think he'd have a completely shitty day at work when he stood up from behind the counter and saw a blushing ex-regular ducking into the aisle of dildos. What was more interesting, was that Natsu spent over twenty minutes in the aisle without coming out. Gray was curious. Beyond curious.

Meanwhile, Natsu was feeling slightly dizzy as he tried to get his legs to move but he had run straight into the middle of the aisle and dildos were… everywhere. They're just everywhere. Why are there so many? Who needs this many?

"Can I help you?" came a low and seductive voice from right behind his ear.

Natsu jumped up and one step back in alarm, grabbing the nearest object to protect himself when he noticed it was Gray, looking terribly amused as Natsu held something straight out toward him like a sword.

Natsu, heart in his throat, followed Gray's line of sight to his own hand and his eyes went as wide as saucers as he took in the transparent pink ice jelly dildo that was now in his tight grip. He felt his arm trembling and heat rising to his face and he wanted to put it back but his arm wasn't cooperating with him, just shaking and effectively waiving the dildo in Gray's face. Why can't you get your own body to listen to you the one time it actually matters? What are you doing?

He tried to explain himself, he really did, but he couldn't get out the right string of words and what came out was, "I, you, this-, I-I was just-"

He was seriously just holding out the dildo for Gray to inspect and Gray was looking back and forth between the dildo and Natsu's face which you're absolutely fucking sure is displaying a level of red not recorded on the color spectrum. Just say something! Anything! Any actual words will do!

"For you," was what he blurted out because it was the first thing that came to mind and oh my god, no. Not those words. You didn't. You did not just say that. Literally anything else would have been better. Anything at all. Fix it. Fix it now.

Gray was opening his mouth to say something but Natsu let out a rushed string of words before he could. "W-will you go out with m-me?" You. Fail. At. Life. You asked him out after offering him a dildo. Oh. My. God. You are a disgrace. An embarrassment to the human race. He's going to throw you out of the store. He's looking at the dildo, just put it back on the shelf and save what little dignity you have left. Would that be rude, though, to put the thing back on the shelf when Gray is looking at it? This is so awkward and how long are you supposed to hold it out for? Dammit, Gray, what is so fucking interesting about it? Just look away! I am begging you-

Gray's eyes widened as the words registered in his head. He bit his lip, looked up into wide green eyes, and asked, "Like a date?"

Natsu nodded vehemently because that wasn't a rejection, you still have a chance and then Gray looked down and oh dear god, you're still holding the dildo. Put it down. Just put it down, for fuck's sake!

"Okay."

Natsu's eyes shot up to look into Gray's, shocked and his arm was trembling and Gray grabbed the dildo from his hand and asked, "So is this like when you bring your date flowers?"

Natsu felt like he was going to spontaneously combust into flames and only managed a strangled sound low in his throat in response.

Gray went on to lean in closer, lower his voice, and say, "Because you'd have to pay for it before you can give it to me."

Natsu gulped once and stumbled back a little in the aisle, knocking over and catching a blue gel dildo and quickly shoving it back into place, eyes shut until he turned away from it and pulled his scarf over half his face. It slid right back down.

Gray was openly laughing as he walked back toward the front counter to his register and Natsu silently followed, resigned and blushing madly, but not upset because he said okay. Holy shit. You got a date. You managed to ask someone out in the most awkward and humiliating way known to man and you succeeded. You are a legend.

Once Natsu paid for it, Gray took one of the business cards from the counter and wrote his phone number on the back of it, handing it to Natsu. Natsu smiled, a small tinge of pink still on his cheeks and just as he was turning away Gray said, "Hey, Natsu?"

Natsu turned back to Gray. "Y-yeah?"

Gray gripped the pink dildo on the counter at the base, ran his fingers up the shaft, thumbed the tip, and licked his lips as he let his tongue piercing come into view, eyes locked with Natsu's. "I'll think of you when I use it," he said, a low seductive string of sounds.

It was sinful. It was evil for a shirtless Gray with two silver nipple piercings and a tongue piercing that matched to say those words in that tone and Natsu felt his legs turn to jelly and he gripped the counter to hold himself up.

Gray took advantage of the sudden proximity to lean over, slide his fingers through soft pink locks of hair, and crush their lips together, nipping at Natsu's lower lip and twining their tongues once before pulling away with a satisfied smirk.

Natsu was red and turned on and he knew immediately that he was in way over his head. He didn't know if he should thank Erza and Lucy profusely or curse them because Gray looked like he wanted to devour him on the spot and Natsu knew that this one would either break his virgin body or break his racing heart.