With the Wonder Woman movie out at long last, I thought it would be fun to do a way out there story with our favorite couple and see how Bones (in a very out of character way) handled a movie with her favorite super hero character. Of course this one is completely out of character, but I wanted to have fun with this as I enjoy the humor of Booth going a bit nuts when things are a bit "off". I hope you enjoy this one.

Disclaimer: I don't own, or profit from, these characters or franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Booth was in deep and utter loathing right at that moment. He wanted nothing more than to find who was responsible and shoot them. No, that was too kind and merciful. He needed to show these filth ridden sleaze bags what good, decent, honest people thought of all this bullshit! This was going to seriously screw up a big, and extremely important, part of his life! Imagine! No interest, nor desire, in hitting the proverbial sheets with Bones! And, on top of that totally fucked up state of affairs, never wanting to go to the theater to see a flick ever again! It had taken him years to get Bones to relent on extremely rare occasions and see a movie with him at the theater, and it had taken nearly as long to get her to watch some movies on the TV at home, with that mainly as a concession to spend some serious quality time with their daughter. But now his participation in all that was flushed right down the toilet! And his love of all that totally awesome role playing, let alone sex of any kind, that she had shown him the value of and he lived for on special occasions? That was now swirling in the dregs of the old septic tank, too! The cause of all this horror? That grand cinematic flick Wonder Woman!

Not that he wanted to be misunderstood. No. He thought the film was great. Fantastic visuals, great special effects, and incredible stunts and fight scenes. They were totally awesome! The first three or four viewings, that is. Bones, naturally, being the absolute number one fan of Wonder Woman, had made damn sure that they were at the first showing of the flick when it came to town. Not the usual evening show or late afternoon, but the midnight sneak peek viewing. Never mind that her husband, the hard working, completely whipped puppy that could never say no to her, had a six in the AM meeting. Oh, no. That didn't matter. It had to be the midnight showing. And then what happened afterward? That's right. You guessed it. Bones was in rare form and had demanded, not requested, the performance of a lifetime from Junior and the Boys! Three times! Needless to say Senior had been practically catatonic during that whole meeting, which had included the Attorney General himself! When he got home from work wanting nothing more than to wolf down a sandwich and then go straight to bed until the next morning he discovered that something wasn't quite right.

You see Bones was ruthlessly logical, and had a perfect memory. He was convinced that if you asked her what a professor said on a certain day when she was in college she could deliver the whole damn lecture verbatim. Therefor whenever he wanted to see a movie again for fun she would always get this pinched look on her face seemingly questioning his sanity. So imagine his surprise when he got home and found her there waiting for him, and rather impatiently, too.

"Your clothes are laid out on the bed," she told him bluntly. "Get changed and then we can leave so we don't miss any of the opening scenes."

He'd been about to object, but he saw the look she gave him when he opened his mouth and thought better of it. It was that look she gave child abusers and serial killers. You know the one. The one that would have Satan running from the room screaming in fear! Not wanting to fan the flames any further he'd gone into the bedroom and found, to his horror, an exact duplicate of the three piece suit that the Steve Trevor character in the film had worn to the bar near the beginning of the film. It was thick and made of wool, too, as suits of that era were and he also saw that the shirt had one of those old fashioned separate high stiff collars. It was June and blazing hot! He was going to roast in the thing!

And roast he had! Not even the air conditioning in the theater had prevented him from sweating a gallon as he sat there, miserable as all get out, watching the movie for a second time. Bones hadn't helped as she'd absently stroked his thigh all during the movie, giving Junior and the Boys a loving pat every now and again to let them know that there was going to be some more of the festivities after they got home. Upon getting home he had immediately shed the suit from Hell and then tried to get into bed and sleep. That got him nowhere as she had immediately leveled the outrageous charge that he was demonstrating that all that malarkey early in the film about Clio's treatise on sex was true when it concluded men were absolutely worthless when it came to pleasure for a woman. Naturally Junior had something to say about that load of bull and spent much of the night proving that Clio had been an idiot of the first order!

That had been in early June. It was now mid November, or thereabouts, and Bones had dragged his whipped, pathetic, sorry ass to a daily showing of Wonder Woman since then without fail or missing a beat. And after each showing? You guessed it. A set of several rounds of hot, sweaty, role playing sex to round out the night. Mitch was delighting in calling him the ultimate pervert at confession and he had more Hail Mary's and Our Father's to do than he'd ever thought possible. And Junior? Well, he hated to admit it, but poor Junior had reached his limit. Last night he'd been AWOL. Not even a twitch! Today had been just as bad. The poor guy was just hanging there limp as a wet noodle! Totally useless! If Sweets were here, Rest His Soul, the Freudian hooey would be flying left and right! And Bones apparent development of OCD with respect to the flick? Man! The Boy would be having wet dreams about handling that case!

Now, though, he had a new problem to nip in the bud somehow. Bones, bless her little head, had not been too pleased with Junior over Junior's lack of, ahem, enthusiasm the night before and just a little bit ago. No matter what she tried, even up to and including a little floor show of her, ahem, fiddling, hadn't been enough to make the poor fella even twitch a millimeter! This was just totally messed up! He was married to a walking, talking sexual Goddess and he couldn't get it up! Sure she had a bit of jam in her jelly after her two pregnancies as Pops, Rest His Soul, used to say when a woman was a bit more, uh, voluptuous, but like Pops he earnestly believed that the slightly extra padding was in all the right places and made Bones even sexier than ever. Not that he would ever tell her that! She was still pissed that her beloved Wonder Woman costume no longer fit, so there was no way he was going to make mention of the fuller curves. He was still trying to protect the jewels after he had been given The Glare a year before when he had suggested that instead of the ill fitting (the poor word choice he'd used at the time) Wonder Woman outfit that they could ship the kids to the Hodgins household and they could have their own private Halloween Party and dress up, or, rather, undress, as Nudists. He had thought it was an awesome idea, but for the first time ever he had seen Bones become somewhat vain about her appearance. He'd been careful ever since, needless to say!

"I'm making you an appointment for a physical exam tomorrow," Bones said entering the living room interrupting his loathsome musings.

Booth looked up and saw she was in her robe and it was obvious she didn't have a stitch on underneath. He looked down at Junior only to see that the Big Guy wasn't even close to being in the land of the living, the Traitor! He'd always thought that saying about too much of a good thing was so much bullshit, but now he had living proof of the truth of the adage. Junior was dead to the world because of too much sex!

"What on Earth for?" Booth questioned immediately. He hated going to the doctor.

"I'm concerned that you may be developing erectile dysfunction and if so you may need to be prescribed Viagra," she told him.

"VIAGRA!" Booth practically shouted. He was torn between crying in shame, mentally screaming at Junior to get his traitorous ass in gear and start saluting like a good soldier, or argue to the ends of the Earth that there would be no little blue pills in this happy home! OOH! Someone was definitely going to pay for all this bullshit!

"If that is what is required to maintain an optimally healthy sexual component in our marriage, then that is what needs to be done," she informed him.

"But Bones! You screwed poor Junior into a damn coma!" Booth tried to argue, all the while knowing it was a lost cause.

"All the more reason to explore a possible pharmacological solution to the problem as apparently your sexual physiology has become less than capable of maintaining a fully satisfactory libido," she rationally explained.

Booth had to process what she had just said in smaller words and when he realized what she had said his eyes widened and his nostrils flared. "My plumbing is in perfect working order!" he exclaimed, almost shouting. "I am a well oiled, perfectly symmetrical love machine! Have you forgotten my God like sperm count?"

He couldn't believe that she was turning this all around on him as if it were his fault that she had been screwing him senseless on a nightly basis ever since that damn movie had hit the theaters! He only thanked the heavens that last night had been the last showing of the film!

"It has been some time since your sexual physiology has been examined in any real fashion, so this turn of events could very well be an indication of potential issues or deficiencies," Bones calmly explained. "I will make the appointment, and will see what the results tell us. If there is nothing physically wrong, then we may be forced to seek assistance of a psychological nature, despite how imprecise a science that truly is, if it can indeed be called a science."

Booth watched as she left the living room, grumbling about the evils of such a soft science. He couldn't believe what had just happened. Two measly nights of Junior missing in action and his entire system of manhood delight was called into question! All the more reason to find who was responsible for this apocalypse and do some serious damage! He knew what he needed to do. It was time to pull in the so called King of the Lab and let him work his magic. Yep. Someone was going down for this one!

A/N: Here's the first of three chapters on this one. I am sorry that I haven't posted anything in some time but for the last several months I have had some serious health complications that have prevented me from being able to write with any real clarity and consistency. I am doing better now, even if still recovering, and hope to continue writing on a more regular basis. I am hoping to have the second chapter on this one within a week or so. I hope you've enjoyed this new one. BTW, Booth really did like Wonder Woman, as did I, it's just the four months of daily viewings that ruined it for him. LOL. Gregg.