Disclaimer: I own nothing. This is purely for entertainment purposes, and I am making no profit off of this.

I inspected the scroll in my hand. It described some kind of earth jutsu. I'm not sure if I can learn that one, given my lightning affinity. I tossed it into a storage seal anyways.

The next one has some kind of weird-ass lightning armour? Increases speed and durability… sounds like a crappy low-budget rip off of the Raikage's lightning chakra mode. Whatever, I'll take it.

Mist maker jutsu. Pretty sure they used this a lot down in Kiri. I'll take this one too.

Ooh, hit the jackpot with this one! The scroll I was holding right now had the Land of Sky's signature jutsu, flying. The user would take their chakra, mould it into mist, and then fly with it! Ooh, flying would be so cool! I can only imagine the shit I could with this-

"You have kept me waiting long enough." Orochimaru's coldly spoken words cut through my thoughts.

Ah, damn. Orochimaru has been rather indulgent with me so far. I thought that he just liked me or something. I guess not. He was just excited or something? Maybe that, I don't know.

"So we're going now?"

"Yes."

Okaaay. I might die here.

I really wanted to check out the rest of the scrolls here. They probably had some cool jutsu in them. I wasn't feeling too confident about my chances of survival if I asked to go back to the library after we were done. I resolved to come back here later.

Actually, wasn't one of Orochimaru's goals to learn all of the jutsu in the world? Something like that? Maybe I could convince him with that.

Or, quite possibly, since Orochimaru had already been here to get that first piece of the Reibi, he probably already checked out the scrolls in the library.

Orochimaru lead the way through the street of the abandoned city, Or actually, wasn't it supposed to be a fortress or something? A flying fortress? The people of the Land of Sky used the Reibi's potent dark chakra to power up some ridiculous flying mechanism for the thing.

And now, Orochimaru is going to shove the rest of that ridiculous chakra battery into me.

This could either turn out to be very good, or very, very bad.

We made our way to the tallest building of the entire fortress, which was smack dab in the middle of the thing. It had all sorts of statues and decorations on and around it. They weren't even trying to be inconspicuous with this. It's like they were trying to announce to the world: important building, right here! Get over here and blow this shit up. If you do, we're done for!

Idiots. Maybe that's why this giant pile of junk crashed to the ground.

Inside the building was a massive room with blue walls covered in seals. From the walls extended what appeared to be strings of webbing, which all came together in the middle of the room, in what appeared to be a large cocoon of some sort.

"So… uh, what do I do?"

Orochimaru only gave a smirk in response.

Thanks Orochimaru.

I walked towards the glowing cocoon. Do I like, stick my hand in it, or something? Maybe I should poke it with a stick.

…

Unfortunately, there were no convenient 'anime physics' to get me a stick. Instead, I tentatively poked at the cocoon with my hand. It jiggled in a disturbingly liquid way.

I looked back towards Orochimaru for guidance. He just stared back at me with scientific lust in his eyes, and the small smirk remaining on his thin, pale lips.

Man, this is uncomfortable.

Alrighty, well…

The sound of electric chirping rang in air as the Chidori snapped to life in my hand. The bird calls sang louder as I raised the ball of condensed lightning chakra higher and plunged it into the cocoon.

The opaque white surface of the cocoon collapsed inwards, reminiscent of a balloon. The stupid thing still refused to pop.

Gritting my teeth, I stripped of the safety features of the Chidori, removing the inherent weakening of the lightning for user safety to turn it into something that I tentatively called the Extreme Chidori!

With the 'extreme' in italics, and an exclamation point!

Extreme Chidori!®

Yeah, got to work on that name.

The cocoon folded further into itself. As the Extreme Chidori!® roared onwards, it burnt my hand. The sickly sweet smell of burning flesh stung my nostrils, and the intense pain sent cold shivers of dark chakra through me.

Oh, sweet, sweet Grey Chidori, here we go!

The cocoon finally ruptured, sending sticky white fluid flying everywhere.

I struggled to ignore how similar to semen it felt.

Not that I would know or anything…

Anyways, the cocoon ruptured, and the remnants of it were lying on the ground in glistening piles. Where the cocoon used to be was…

… nothing?

The cocoon was empty?

Well damn.

No power boost for me, I guess.

I turned back to Orochimaru. And - hoooboy.

He's looking pissed.

What could've happened to the rest of the Reibi? Now, obviously others know about the thing, that was the plot of one of the movies or something, but none of them could actually use Reibi, or they would've done so in canon.

Perhaps one of them had seen me with my successful Reibi implant, and had reverse engineered the process with the rest? The dude who used dark chakra in the movie was a skilled doctor or something, right? I really don't know, I'm just grasping at straws here.

"Follow," Orochimaru's cold, and angry hiss rang through the room. I looked back just in time to see his Akatsuki cloak swish dramatically as he exited.

I guess after the Reibi turned out to be a bust, Orochi-chan isn't in such a good mood anymore, huh? Probably shouldn't do anything to piss him off more. I hurried to follow him.

Man, mah books! I gotta come back here later for that sweet ninjutsu library. I did get a good haul out of it though, so it's not all bad, but come on, there are like a million more scrolls still in there!

Maybe I'll come back after I murder Orochimaru.

I don't dislike the guy anymore, it's just that he's going to invade Konoha, right? And kill the Hokage? That would be bad. There's also a bunch of other crap that he does later on that may prove to be problematic.

So I'll murder him!

And Kabuto too.

Also whoever the fuck stole the rest of the Reibi.

Easy!

For now though, I'll just happily follow him around.

Orochimaru and I returned to the Pein's tower in Ame in silence. The trip, which lasted for several days, was passed with not a single word passed between us.

Rippled purple eyes followed us through the walls as we rose through the tower. Orochimaru lead the way through the winding, rusted labyrinth of the tower. We walked into the Akatsuki meeting room.

Normally, I would have made a loud and obnoxious comment, followed by some explosions or something, but here, I wasn't feeling brave enough in a room full of people who could actually kill me.

"Orochimaru," Nagato greets him, "Was your trip successful?"

Orochimaru scowled, "Unfortunately not. It appears as though our objective had already been stolen by the time we had arrived."

"Hm. How unfortunate."

"I request… "

"No, Orochimaru."

Oh man. Orochimaru looks pissed.

Nagato continued, "You have taken too long already with your trip. You need to go out and take on missions now. You may not look for the Reibi."

Oh jeez, if Orochimaru looked mad before, well…

I'm pretty sure that the Reibi was supposed to be one of those secret secret projects. Orochimaru is a very secretive guy, and the fact that Nagato had pried into his business… yikes.

Orochimaru narrowed his eyes, "As you wish."

He started to head out and I followed him. He whipped around suddenly, "And you," he hissed, positively grinning, "Yes… this will be a good trial run. Go out, find the rest of the Reibi, and return to me with it. Either absorb it into yourself or seal it. It doesn't matter. Don't come back without it."

I gave him an informal, loose salute and a sloppy grin, "Sure thi-"

SHINK!

I looked downwards. Orochimaru's hand had pierced my abdomen.

"I will not tolerate this sort of behaviour from you anymore," his voice was a cold whisper, "I've had enough with your attitude."

Orochimaru's hand twisted into my stomach, grinding into my innards. The pain was excruciating, but not overly so. Losing my arm hurt more than this. Besides, I could already feel the dark chakra churning, and my healing factor beginning to patch up some of the damage.

"If you fail to return with the Reibi, or if you decide to run off and betray me…"

Ah fuck!

Orochimaru's hand lit on fire inside me. There was no way that he did this crap on normal minions. He must be doing it to me because he knows that I'll live in the end. But fuck!

Holy shit!

Is he summoning snakes inside me?. NonononononononononostoptakeitouttakeitouttakitOUT! Thedarkchakrabegantospinginsidemybodyandittriedtofrythesnakesbutitcouldn'tandittriedtohealmeanditcouldn'tandI'msohelplesssomebodyandthesnakesarestartingtoEATMEANDMYCHAKRAANDMYEVERYTHING!

"Are we at an understanding?"

For the first time in my life, I was reduced to simple terrified nodding.

Dammit.

I hate being weak.

Fuck.

A/N: This chapter comes both late and really short. I'm really sorry guys, but I just couldn't get past this part of the story. I figured that I might as well get it out there after trying to get it done for several months. I'll figure something out for next chapter, don't y'all worry!

MrTicklesMMM: I don't think it's exactly that Seidome is talented, it's just that his body is adapted to dark chakra. According to the wiki, dark chakra from the Reibi is absolutely ridiculous. Shinno, using dark chakra, could make shockwaves and even produce a Rasengan-like thingy with it. Even crazier, he claimed to be able to open all Eight Gates with no drawbacks so long as he had access to dark chakra. None of his dark chakra jutsu required hand signs and the only drawback is that dark chakra can rebound dangerously if a jutsu is interrupted. So, because Seidome's system is all screwed up from Orochimaru's experimentation, and he has the Reibi's dark chakra, it's easier for him to learn one handed seals. I think I explained that a little bit last chapter though. With respect to teaching others, his knowledge of one handed seals is heavily leaning on his natural dark chakra ability with no hand seals, which makes it practically unusable for others.

You raised an interesting point with the fangirls. Why do Male SIs run away from their fangirls when they practically no moral boundaries? That does seem rather strange now that I think about it. I just threw it in as a gag, not really thinking about it.

I'm still figuring out what direction to go for this story, so I'm not exactly certain what path Seidome will take later on. I do sort of have an idea of where he's going, but nothing too concrete.

Some Guy In An Ambulance: Thanks for pointing out the 'machine gun,' reference. I wasn't really thinking about it when I wrote it. It doesn't really fit in with the setting, does it? Maybe Sarutobi Hiruzen, 'The Professor,' heard about these things? I don't know. It doesn't fit, but I can't think of any other thing that would complete that analogy. If anybody has suggestions, feel free to leave them in the reviews.