AN: Hello again! After a monstrously long writer's block (partly because the part where one scene logically follows the other ended with the arrival to Hogwarts), I have finally managed to write another chapter. Disclaimer:
I would like to say a great thank you for everyone who stuck with this story through this long pause, especially Maester Lee, who thought I was out of ideas for the story altogether and wrote a review offering some ways to wrap this story up. Don't worry, I'm not through with Angela yet... :)
Enjoy the chapter, and I promise I will do all I can to make the next pause not as long as this one...
no, the world of Gilderoy Lockhart certainly doesn't belong to the author of this story. After all, although I've heard his stories are not that bad (of course, it's not a long list of wizarding bestsellers and winning the Witch Weekly's Most Charming-Smile Award five times, but it's a start!), I think he would do better to write about real celebrities of our world - for example, about me!
I'm sitting behind the desk in the Charms classroom and the world is all right again. Since going to the classrooms was such a disaster last night, I used my immense intellect and asked Ernie MacRoma to go with me to the classroom. He agreed and went with me, which was a good decision since we've both earned something – I arrived finally in time, even though not on time since dragged me out for some reason good fifteen minutes before the lesson started, and he got a chance to listen firsthand to the sad ballad of my tragic life full of mourning and grief. Many people would fight over themselves to get such an accomplishment and he's earned it only the second day he's with me! And he was moved indeed – in fact, he was moved so much that once we arrived to the classroom, he was immediately moved by his legs to the farthest part of the classroom, obviously in order to spread the story there while I do it at the front.
Well, sadly for him, I do not spread it because firstly it's an honor that few people deserve and also I don't want to alienate this professor as well. Of course, lessons with him will not be good for anything, since he's clearly only a baby (he even needs to put books under himself so that he could see us!). Still, I'm too friendly a person to try and do bad things in his lesson. Oh, and he calls us by our names! That is very nice to us!
„Hannah Abbott?"
„That's me!"
„Thank you. Angela..."
„...Ori Gami Fuku Jima Mitsu Bishi Ja Pan Dae Woo Belladonna!" I end victoriously. He looks at me, squeaks in surprise, and keeps staring at me with his mouth agape. Now that, on the other way, is extremely rude!
"Oh my god, don't you know it's rude to stare that much, do you?" I ask him politely.
At least he has the decency to look ashamed. "That is right, Miss Belladonna. I am sorry," he says weakly and continues calling the names, even though the most important one has been said already.
Finally, all the unimportant names are said and he finally can proceed with the les… What? Why does he bore us with the unimportant technicalities again? If it had any sense to start with, it would be when McGonagall said it for the first time! We don't need to hear the same boring words twice! Who cares if there has been an idiot who didn't pay attention to his buffalo before it trampled him?
"But we've already heard this in transfiguration, there's no point in saying this again!" I exclaim, and this time it seems at least some of my friends, including Ernie MacTorino, nod their heads in agreement.
"I believe you would hear it there, Professor McGonagall is very thorough," the baby nods, "but the principles of transfiguration and charms are slightly different, and at any rate it doesn't hurt to remind you of the basics. The more you hear them the quicker you learn them." To my annoyance, my friends again nod in agreement. They should choose a side already!
"Well it's useless since we already know them so we don't have to learn them again, quicker or not," I completely tear his argument apart, "we could be learning magic instead of these boring rules!"
"Well then, tell me the three most important qualities you need for successful casting of a spell," he surprises me. He actually tries to ask me a question, would you believe that? He probably thinks I don't know as much as I think and that I won't be able to answer correctly. Well, he's in for a rude awakening – I don't technically remember the answer, but it seems easy to answer because the answer is obvious.
"First you have to be a witch, then you have to have a wand and finally you have to be awesome like me because otherwise you would make a mistake!" I confidently exclaim.
"This is a wrong answer. You will start with learning quite basic spells, for which you do not need to be "awesome", as you perhaps overconfidently put it, and although it is true that most wizards and witches cannot do magic without a wand, a truly talented individual, like our Headmaster, might be able to do it. The only premise you said correctly was being a witch (or a wizard, I might add), but since this is a school for wizards and witches, the ability to do magic is assumed for our students. The correct answer would be determination, precision and a necessary amount of magical might, with the latter only being an issue with some of the more advanced spells. You do not have to be ashamed of not knowing the answer, however, since I do not expect you to know it already. I know that learning these basic principles takes some time, and that is why I say them in this class even though you have most likely already heard them," he monologues. Stupid git, so he knows it, so what? There's no reason for him to boast about it for like five minutes. But what annoys me even more are my friends, who once again nod at his words. They were supposed to pick the correct side!
"So what? You don't need to brag that you know the right answer, you baby!" I shout at him. Will he see how rude he was?
"Detention, Miss Belladonna," he retorts. Apparently, he won't. "You are old enough to have manners. Use them."
Oh my god, would you believe it? By the way, you don't have to answer, this is a rhetorical question. I know very well that you wouldn't believe it. He acts almost like Snape, handing out detentions just because someone doesn't worship him. What did I do to deserve such terrible teachers? Nothing!
I want to complain loudly about this unfair decision, but the baby had already moved away from me and it continues with the boring so-called rules. This wouldn't normally be a problem, but I would never complain, because I don't want your pity so stop pitying me at once! Besides, those stupid boring rules make me sleepy; they make me so sleepy that my perfect hand perfectly shoots up to my mouth, I loudly stifle a yawn, and then I fall under the influence of Morpheus so thoroughly that my head quickly falls on the table with a thud which no one hears because the thick book of Charms which I have picked up just before I fell asleep falls from my delicate hand with even bigger thud, and then I remember nothing more because I am sleeping.
My short sleep left me very refreshed and now I look forwards to rest of the class. I slept for twenty minutes, hearing absolutely nothing from what the baby teacher talked about, because I was sleeping, but then he stopped making everyone bored with those boring rules and handed out quills for the first Charm he was finally going to teach. Luckily, I have woken up in the exact same moment, which means I will get to do magic! It's good that life is at least sometimes kind to me!
When I wake up, the baby teacher walks to me and says: "Miss Belladonna, you should know that if you didn't have a detention already, your sleep faking would have earned you one. That is not the behavior we expect here at Hogwarts. Now, be so kind and try to turn this quill to black – the incantation is Color ater."
How dare he? I wasn't pretending sleep, I was really sleeping! He should know the difference, he asked me something during that time and he saw that I wasn't moving or responding at all! But I should have expected that, how can he distinguish between a real sleep and sleep-faking, he's just an incompetent little baby who is pretending to be a teacher. I'd like to know why no one would point this out for him! They're probably afraid that he will put them in those detentions, which is completely stupid, but it's the result of the child despicably abusing its position of power! But that's terrible! People like that aren't supposed to be teachers!
Well, that doesn't matter now, because I can do magic again, and that despicable child was at least kind enough to tell me the incantation. Recoloring the quill might be a difficult task, but I'm too powerful for that to stop me!
I victoriously point on the quill and say: "Color ater!"
And nothing happens? What? They gave me a malfunctioning quill, the idiots! Angrily, I point at the quill once again and shout: "Color ater!"
Sadly, I might have been shouting my name instead for all the good it makes. No, that's not right. It would be far more useful shouting my name instead, that quill would at least be happy to hear such a beautiful name, and everyone else would too. Wait! I know it's completely unheard of, but I actually might be making a mistake! That teacher told me I'm should change the quill to black, and that would be a terrible mistake, because black is an ugly colour!
I start to think very hard about that incantation he told me. I am unbelievably skilled in languages, completely fluent in English, Italian and Japanese, as you know, but this isn't in either of them. It must be in a completely different language which no one knows, which is completely unfair to us! Still, that incantation must mean something, and given what we had to do, it would probably specify the color we would turn the quill into. "Color" sounds almost like it means "colour", which means the other word must mean "black". I just must change the last word and I will be successful! Oh, how smart I am!
I victoriously point my wand towards the quill and shout: "Color…" Oops. We have a problem. How do you say "pink" in Unknownoldlanguigish? I don't know. How unfair of them! They made the spells in that unknown language just so we wouldn't be able to change them! But wait, I don't have to play by their rules. I'm a great outside-of-the-box thinker, and I realize I actually don't have to create the new spell in that language! I victoriously point my wand towards the quill once again and shout: "Color piiiiiiiiiink!"
There is a ray of beautiful pink light which blinds my eyes, and then I open my eyes again. The quill is pink! I always knew I was able to do this! I am sooo powerful!
I look around me victoriously to announce my success, and I get another happy surprise when I see I don't have to, because everyone is already looking at me. Well, everyone but the baby professor, but I think I can forgive him this time, since he seems to be fallen from the beautiful stack of books behind his beautiful desk.
At the next moment, he rises back at the top and – what a terrible plot twist! – there is a frown on his pink face. "Miss Belladonna, you should have said the spell in Latin. Please, do not try this again, experimenting with spells might be dangerous even for experienced spell-crafters. Besides, my instructions were to turn your quill to black."
I can't believe my ears. He would really expect me to do such an atrocity?
"But black is so ugly, and I prefer pink! Do you have a problem with that?" I say menacingly.
"Well, I suppose the colour isn't as important as the act of recoloring the quill," he admits, scratching his beautiful pink hair, but then he pierces me with his beautiful pink eyes. "But still, I told you to recolor the quill, not the whole classroom with everyone inside."
"And what does it matter? So I made everyone less ugly than before, what's the big deal?" I retort and because the bell has just rung, I happily leave the classroom.
I have just decided that this academic achievement should be celebrated with a small well-deserved rest, and therefore I head to the bedroom. But I can't reach it! Would you believe it? Everything is against me! The world itself is conspiring to bring all the problems upon me! I just performed perfectly in the class, and when I want to have some rest afterwards, I can't, and it's only because someone has already come to congratulate me... did I say that someone has come to congratulate me? Would you believe it? Finally someone who recognizes my awesome power, and who comes to pay his compliments! The world is right again!
"Did you really mean it when you said we were ugly?" asks my friend Justin, again in his ugly look.
"Yes, why did you turn back?" I look at him confusedly.
"You mean why I didn't stay in that pink monstrosity?" he says with a repulsed face. "I like my face as it is! Who would want pink eyes or pink hair anyway?"
"People like me do!" I retort. Seriously, how come no one here knows anything about natural beauty?
"People like you?" he says disbelievingly, mouth agape. "Does- Does that mean there are more people like you?"
"Of course!" I exclaim and my eternally sad eyes start to shine. Finally, I have an opportunity to tell him something about me, which means he will know me better, which means we will be better friends, which means he will be a better person. Isn't it amazing how much I care for other people? I know it is. I even care for the stupid idiots with both parents! There simply cannot be a bigger sacrifice! But of course, they never properly acknowledge how good person I am. You're very lucky you are different. Where have I been? Oh, right... "I came here from an orphanage, and the orphanage is full of people like me! Every girl back there is super powerful being who will save the world, whom everyone likes and who likes the pink colour! And we all have no parents!"
"Oh, you have no parents?" asks Justin, far less harshly than before. "I'm sorry, that must have been really bad for you."
"Oh, it was!" I confirm happily. Finally, someone who understands my life! "Thank you, thank you, thank you! I'm really happy that you understand it! My whole life has been nothing but terrible! There was a disaster on every corner! I think the fate has it in for me! But of course, I would never complain. Not only I hate people who are complaining all the time, I also hate being pitied because I am pitied all the time. How dare you pity me? I should have realized how evil you are when you started scoffing at the pink color, you jerk! I bet you have both parents!"
His face, full of compassion, starts to change throughout my rant into anger and confusion. I bet he didn't think I would see through him! Serves him right! "But… what did I… what?" he manages to stutter in the end.
"What? You're surprised I saw through you?" I ask him sarcastically.
"Saw through what? I didn't do anything!" he protests.
"Yes you did! You pitied me, even though you knew I hate it! And you hate pink!" I respond, tearing his clumsy defense apart.
"How's that bad? You even liked it, you thanked me!" he asks incredulously and looks around himself, probably trying to find someone who agrees with him. That's hopeless, of course – not only I'm the one who is right and anyone in their right mind would see that, but the common room also seems to be completely deserted except for Ernie MacFirenze, who seemed to be inconspicuously backing towards the door, and only gave Justin a shrug before he turned around and ran away.
"You see? You are wrong and he knows it!" I exclaim victoriously.
"How am I wrong, and how would he know it?" he tries to defend himself with technicalities. Of course, he cannot be such a great speaker like me!
"Because you were arguing with me," I graciously explain to him. Can you believe it? He behaved like a jerk and I am still so patient with him! How is it possible that no one still sees how great I am?
"What? Has anyone ever told you that not everything is about you?" he asks, turns away leaves before I can retort! Would you believe his nerve? Oh, you don't have to answer, this was a rhetorical question. I know very well you wouldn't.
I scowl at the world, barely concealing a yawn. Which idiot created this timetable? Some classes are way too late. I'm of course very tolerant (but why am I even saying it? You all know it already…), I can even live with having more than one class in a day, but this is too much. I have to draw a line somewhere, and this part of the day is basically the night, as far as I am concerned.
Sadly, it seems that the senile headmaster is ignoring my constructive criticism and makes us study in the most ridiculous parts of the day. If it can be even called parts of the day, because I firmly believe this is a night already. He simply refuses to consider my good ideas and runs the school in such a ridiculous way that it is impossible to take it seriously. He even…
"Any problem, Miss?"
I look up. It seems I got lost in my thoughts for a moment, because the teacher is looking at me weirdly. Would you believe that? You don't have to answer, it is a rhetorical question. I know perfectly well you wouldn't, I never get lost in my thoughts!
"Any problem?" I repeat disbelievingly. "Are you joking? First I have to live the worst week ever here, all my friends are so ungrateful and the teachers are so terrible, and now we have class when it's too late for classes? No one sane would have assigned this class to us when it's so late!"
"I know the first week can be hard, especially with such a long Friday," says the teacher sympathetically. "I'm sure you'll see in no time that your friends and teachers aren't really that bad. And I'm sorry that you don't like the time of my class, but I hope you'll get used to it soon, because I'm afraid I can't be changed."
Inwardly, I roll my eyes (but of course only inwardly, I'm not that rude). Clearly, the teacher doesn't know what she's talking about, just like every stupid teacher in this stupid school. "Oh really? The subject has to be taught now? Look, it's dark already!" I point out the obvious flaw in her defence.
"Well, when else should Astronomy take place if not at night?" asks the teacher naïvely. "And you don't have to roll your eyes, you'll see I'm right."
"Oh my god, you still don't know? I can't believe you even need me to point it out!" I tell her patiently when is seems she is genuinely clueless. Seriously, I'm an angel, but you already knew that. I even don't blame the teachers for not being as patient and clever as I am, because that's impossible, but does anyone appreciate it? No! No one of the teachers has a shred of common sense! "You're a witch, just do magic! Make the stars shine in the day or something!"
"No one can't do that!" exclaims Ernie MacGenova, which only proves he doesn't know me in the slightest.
"Mr Macmillan is absolutely right," the teacher shows her incompetence, "no wizard is powerful enough to influence the stars. And even if we were able to do so, we would not, as it would be impossible to hide from Muggles, so it would break the Statute of Secrecy."
"What statute of secrecy?" I ask her.
"You don't know? How come?" the visibly surprised teacher asks me. "Even if you are from the muggle world, the teacher who came to your family should have told you about it. Our world is hidden from the muggle world, and it needs to stay that way. We can't do things that muggles will notice, it takes too much work to make them forget."
"And what are Muggles?" I naturally ask. I've never even heard that word!
"Oh, sorry. That's how we call those who can't do magic and normally don't know about our world. Didn't that teacher tell you at least that much?"
"No, he didn't!" I exclaim in righteous rage. "Snape didn't tell me anything, because he is evil! He even tried to break my lipstick!"
"Break your lipstick?" the teacher raises her eyebrows. "Anyway, I'm sure there was a reason. He is not really evil. He's just..."
"Yes, he is evil!" I exclaim in even righteouser rage. "Don't you ever try to deny it, you don't know anything about him anyway! He broke my lipstick, he made me sleep in a dirty pub, and he skins the pupils alive! Even worse, he LAUGHED AT ME! I hate him and he simply deserves to be hated, because I would never hate someone who doesn't deserve it, since I'm absolutely perfect unlike idiots like you, so don't question me again! First you invent some stupid statutes just so that we have to attend classes in such a stupid time, and you are also condescending to me as if you thought you know more than I do! Did you even notice how terribly rude you are? Whatever, I'm leaving this stupid so-called class!"
"Wait!" she says sharply, frowning. "That was very rude of YOU. I take it that you're very tired and you don't know what you're talking. I'm afraid that the class is compulsory, but take a nap for a while and you'll feel better. I'm sure your friends will lend you their notes to copy. Next week try to sleep a bit more in the other days... Where are you going?"
"To the bed. This class is boring anyway and it's time to sleep," I retort. Seriously, she's so stupid. Where does she think I'm going at midnight, to a supermarket?
"I meant what I said, this class is compulsory. If you leave, I'll have to notify your Head of House, and I don't think either of you would be happy about that."
"Whatever!" I shout over my shoulder and finally leave this stupid class.
"Miss Belladonna! I need a word with you!" I hear from behind when I am almost at our common room. I turn around and see our ugly Head of House. I still didn't get over the shock of getting the ugliest teacher here as our Head of House! I'm quite sure the evil Headmaster did it on purpose to punish me for being smarter and mightier than he is! Oh wait, the ugly woman (if you can call that a woman) is still speaking. "...heard that you have just left an Astronomy class. Is that correct?"
"Yes, the teacher is an idiot and it's too late for classes anyway," I explain the situation patiently, even though the teacher is so stupid. Honestly, don't you see how saint I am? I know you do. I hope against chance that the ugly teacher understands it too, but one look at her and it seems I don't have such luck. I never have luck!
"Miss Belladonna, you have to attend the class! The people in the magical England who know as much about Astronomy as Professor Sinistra could be counted on one hand, so return there and show her some proper respect from now on! I have gotten words from several other teachers that you are an exceptionally rude student who does not pay any respects to anyone except herself, and that is completely unacceptable, especially for a student of my house!"
"Who told you such nonsense?" I ask angrily. You have been following me, so you have to know how ridiculous this claim is!
"Let's see," the ugly teacher starts counting on her fingers, "Minerva – that is, Professor McGonagall – has told me you had been so disrespectful that she was forced to take ten points from you. She didn't have to take away points for lack of respect in last ten years! Both Professor Snape and Professor Flitwick – no, young lady, I am speaking right now, you will have your chance to speak once I have ended – they both reported that you had been so disrespectful that you earned yourself a detention, to which especially Professor Flitwick has to resort very rarely, and then you refused to turn up for these detentions, as well as all the detentions assigned for ignoring the first detentions! Professor Quirrell reported that you had absolutely refused to listen to him on the grounds of him being a "Muslim terrorist", which is the most ridiculous claim I have ever heard, and then you have repeatedly disrupted the lesson with demands that he leaves and goes home! Then, in my own lesson, you have called me "too ugly to teach", and now you have called Professor Sinistra an idiot!
Miss Belladonna, our house has always prided itself for being friendly, respectful and hardworking, and I will not allow my students to blatantly ignore our values. So, young lady, you are going to return to the class, apologize to Professor Sinistra for your disrespect, and in the next week, you will continue until you have apologized to every single teacher you disrespected. Did you understand me?"
"You're crazy and I will never apologize for being in the right!" I state clearly. "But don't worry, I am very friendly, so when they come with their apology, I will happily accept it. You can tell this to them, will you?"
"That's it!" says the ugly teacher angrily. "Fifteen points from Hufflepuff for your blatant disrespect and you have a detention with me right now!" With these words, she forcefully grabs my hand and starts to drag me away. Help! Call the police! I am being kidnapped!
I yawn and sleepily rub my eyes. That stupid teacher held me in her office for a whole hour, all the time disrespectfully ranting how I don't have enough respect and that I have to learn it. Between the stupid class and the stupid detention, I have completely missed my beauty sleep! Not that I need it, of course, I'm already breathtakingly beautiful! Would you believe how many boys have already asked me to be their girlfriend? Well, of course you wouldn't. I can't believe either that the number is still zero! Seriously, are all the boys here completely blind?
Well, anyway, when I come down from my bedroom, all my new friends are there, waiting for me. Oh, that's so sweet of them, they decided to surprise me with a party!
"About time! We almost started to think you won't get up at all!" growls Justin in a friendly way.
"Yeah, it's sad that the party has to start late," I admit.
"What, a party? You really thought we were throwing you a party? My god, then you must be quite stupid, aren't you?" Zacharias asks condescendingly. I'm not surprised they didn't tell him about the party, he doesn't seem very friendly to me!
"No, Angela, we're not throwing a party, we came here to tell you to stop being rude to everyone!" says another one of my friends, Wayne. Wait, what? It's not a party?
"Yes, do you think you're going to get any friends if you continue to act like that?" adds Susan, who adds the first opinion of the girls. She should've stayed quiet!
"What are you all talking about?" I shout, overwhelmed by the sheer unfairness. Why aren't they throwing me a party, I deserve one!
"We're talking about the way you're rude to us..." says Megan.
"...and to the teachers," finishes Leanne.
"You disrespectful idiots!" I shout! How dare they talk to me like that? "How dare you talk to me like that! After all that time I was so friendly of you? You're supposed to be my friends, you're not supposed to act like that! You know perfectly well that I have done nothing wrong, but you still continue to blame me for everything, probably because you envy me! Yes, that's it, you're envious of my good luck and beauty and friendliness and smarts and... and... and that's not how real friends behave! You're all so lucky that I am still your friend, you don't deserve it at all, but does anyone appreciate this great sacrifice? No! You're such a..."
"That's enough!" I hear a new voice. I turn around and there, standing up from the armchair where she was practising spells, Hannah Abbott stands up and holds her wand, with Ernie McCortina d'Ampezzo standing behind her!