Warning: Attempted suicide.

Loki had no idea how his feet were still supporting his weight. Maybe he was in some kind of shock that disabled him from clear thinking, but also from completely breaking apart. He was moving mechanically, putting one foot in front of the other without really taking in his surroundings. He was barely aware that he was surrounded by guards from each side and if he focused, he would notice their tight grip on his upper arms. Maybe they were afraid that he could try to run away.

But Loki's mind shut.

The God of Mischief gave up.

There was no hope left in him.

Loki didn't commit all the things against Asgard, Jotunheim and Midgard because he didn't care. It was quite the opposite. He did it because he cared too much and he wanted a chance to prove himself.

All the ambition was now gone.

Loki didn't want to fight anymore. He couldn't fight it anymore.

He was destined to lose.

He was supposed to exist as a shadow to Thor who would be exchanged for the peace treaty between two most powerful realms.

Yet he fought against his fate designed by the Allfather.

And he lost.

And his defeat was final this time.

Loki didn't have the energy to try to change the order of events. He wouldn't even think about the possibility of trying to fight off his guards and run away. He was too tired.

And so the trickster behaved as a model prisoner; he didn't resist in any way as he was dragged towards his personal hell.

Or more accurately, the place of his birth.

Finally, Odin managed to break him.

As Thor ran pass the last corner before the Hall, the hair on the back of his neck stood up.

He couldn't be late. Nothing ever seemed as important as getting to the Hall on time.

In the blink of an eye, the Thunderer was in front of the huge gate. He tried opening it but found the doors locked. Thor didn't hesitate swinging Mjolnir to burst the doors open. They cracked with deafening sound.

The God of Thunder hurried inside to find the Hall horrifyingly empty. Every step Thor took echoed throughout the vast space and reminded Thor of the frantic beating of his own heart. He quickly searched each corner of the Hall with his eyes; looking at each little corner twice in a desperate hope that he might have overlooked his little brother.

Yet the Hall was completely empty.

Thor came late.

"No." Thor breathed out in horror. His head felt dizzy and as if in slow motion, the Mighty God was brought to his knees by an invisible force pressing onto his chest.

Thor has just lost his brother.

Again.

Once again, Thor failed Loki. He swore to him in the dungeons that he would protect him, even from Odin if the need be. But once again he was unable to honour his word and now his little brother was being disposed of as a bargaining leverage. His father confirmed Loki's worst nightmare and exchanged him for a political advantage.

Thor was frozen on the spot. He couldn't move. He felt as if he couldn't breathe.

"Thor." His name was uttered by someone but the Thunderer didn't care enough to raise his head. Nothing mattered anymore. It wouldn't bring Loki back.

"Thor." The voice was more urgent this time, but Thor didn't react anyhow.

"Thor, it's Loki." Frigga's voice said urgently. Hearing his brother's name, Thor raised his head to see his mother standing right in front of him. He didn't hear her coming.

Thor couldn't stand looking into her eyes and so he dropped the gaze.

"Mother, I came late. I am so sorry." Thor whispered but Frigga interrupted him.

"It is not too late, Thor. They are bringing Loki to the Bifrost now. Odin is following them. I will stand up to my husband if I must, but it would be much easier if it didn't come to that. Hurry up to Heimdall's place. I am afraid we don't have much time." With the last word, Frigga disintegrated in the air.

Thor took a moment to adjust to the new hope. Frigga wasn't in the Hall; she was standing with Heimdall on the Bifrost, ready to fight Loki's guards if the need be. Thor never saw his mother actually using her fighting skills and magical abilities in a real battle. There was never the need for that. Thor didn't doubt that his mother was extraordinarily powerful, but he doubted she could overpower Odin.

Quickly, Thor got back to his feet. He spinned Mjolnir as fast as he could and made his way straight up through the roof of the Hall. The golden roofing material broke when it came in contact with Mjolnir and within a second, Thor was flying through the air towards the Bifrost. He didn't care that he probably committed treason by destroying the Great Hall of Asgard.

The walk on the Bifrost bridge was the longest one Loki had to endure in his life. Unfortunately, his senses and sense of self-awareness was coming back to him as the initial shock was slowly dying away while growing panic was taking its place.

The bright colours of the bridge were blinding Loki for the first time. Suddenly, everything seemed too bright to take in. Loki stopped. The guards stopped too.

Was he trying to attempt some last desperate escape plan?

"Move." One of the guards spoke firmly.

"I can't." Loki answered, surprised at the unnaturally calm manner. His brain was screaming at him, his heart was threatening to tear his chest apart as it was trying to jump out of his ribcage, yet his voice sounded perfectly controlled.

"Are you hurt?" The guard asked unsure while glimpsing at the others.

"Yes." Loki answered while staring in front of himself with a blank expression. Maybe he was finally going mad.

"Where?" A different guard asked. Loki wasn't sure why they bothered asking. Would they rather tend to his injuries before taking him to face certain torture and death than simply hauling him to Heimdall by force?

"It can't be seen." Loki answered only and without second thoughts, he started running forward as fast as he could. The guards didn't manage to catch him at first and before they began following him, Loki turned to run straight towards the edge of the bridge. He stopped right in front of the endless ocean underneath it and stared right into it. He was aware of the guards being frozen into their places. They understood Loki's intentions and were afraid that if they moved, it might provoke Loki to carry on.

"Loki." One of the guards spoke his name for the very first time. Loki didn't divert his gaze from the endless waves underneath him. "Come back to us. We have got orders."

"I can't go to Jotunheim. I just can't." Loki whispered. He felt the tears flowing onto his cheeks once again. He should probably care that he would die as a crying, unmanly coward. Yet he couldn't bring himself to feel any more humiliation. It felt almost poetic that he would die a coward that Odin always took him for.

"This is not a solution." A guard said desperately. Loki knew that they would probably face harsh punishment for letting him slip away from his punishment. He didn't know whether to feel guilty about it or not. In the end, he decided that considering the little time he had left, it was irrelevant.

"Actually, it is." Loki murmured. He didn't care that he was speaking out loud now. He didn't care if the guard would tell what he said to Odin or his family later on. Some inner force was forcing him to speak and he was glad to let it. "I am not a relict. I never was. I am a breathing, thinking being and I will not be used as a mere mean to an end. Odin can find a different way to ensure the peace with Jotunheim."

Loki tried to make the fatal step yet he found that he couldn't. His last words couldn't be spoken about Odin. He didn't deserve that.

"Please, tell Thor and Frigga that it was Thanos. He wanted Midgard. He tortured me to give it to him. I wasn't strong enough. Tell them I am sorry. Tell them that I love them. I always have." The confession came easily out of Loki lips and without hesitation, he took the step.

Loki closed his eyes.

Yet no feeling of falling came. Loki knew how it felt to be falling better than anyone and so he was surprised not to feel this moment before his body would hit the raging ocean.

Instead, his chest was hit with unimaginable power and he found himself being thrown into the air and almost instantly, he painfully landed on his back on the Bifrost.

Loki opened his eyes and found himself out of breath.

The trickster lifted his head to see Odin standing a few metres away from him. He was frowning more than usually.

"YOU." Odin roared. "What do you think you were doing?"

"Your Majesty, we were…" One of the guards tried to say.

"Not a word. Return to the palace immediately. I will deal with you later." The Allfather didn't spare his subjects a glance. They obeyed his order immediately and ran away.

Odin took few steps towards Loki who didn't dare to move. He was lying still on his back. Too soon, the Allfather's shadow darkened his vision.

"Do you think you can defy my order?" Odin said threateningly quietly. Loki didn't answer.

Out of nothing, Loki felt a heavy burden on his chest. It felt as when Thor put the Mjolnir on him. Yet now the force seemed to be even stronger, pushing all air out of his lungs. Loki couldn't breathe; the feeling of wearing the muzzle was back. The panic was back. Loki's eyes searched frantically for the cause of his suffering, finally setting on Odin's face. Loki didn't know what spell the Allfather was using, but he needed him to stop.

"Please." Loki uttered barely audibly.

"Don't worry. It won't take long." Odin replied.

Loki had no idea what wouldn't take long. Odin was suffocating him. But the vestige of rationality still left in Loki screamed that this didn't make any sense. If Odin wanted him dead, he would let him jump. He didn't want him dead right now, he needed to use him against Jotunheim. Yet Loki wasn't allowed to take in the precious air. He turned onto his side, bringing his knees up to his chained wrists. He closed his eyes.

Suddenly, the pressure on his chest disappeared and out of blue, Loki was able to take a breath in. He did so. Loki didn't care that he started to cough immediately. He was immensely relieved.

"I think you are ready to go to Jotunheim now." The Allfather stated firmly.

Loki didn't understand.

"Odin."

It was his mother's voice. She was there. His mother whom he hasn't seen since his attempt to destroy Jotunheim was there.

"Mother." Loki uttered. He was still lying helplessly on the ground. Loki opened his eyes. He had to see her.

Yet he was welcomed by a different sight.

His chained wrists in front of him were blue.

It took him a moment to understand.

Odin had transformed him back to his Jotun form.

And now his mother was there. She would see him for the monster he was. She would not love him anymore.

"Mother, NO! Please, go away." Loki screamed, his voice breaking. He didn't see Frigga, not yet. He couldn't look her in the eyes to see the disappointment and hatred in them. He couldn't stand seeing himself in this form. He closed his eyes.

Suddenly, Loki felt a warm touch on his shoulder. He knew it was Frigga.

"Mum, please. Go away." Loki cried. His tears would freeze as they touched his skin. The Frost Giants didn't cry.

"Loki. Look at me." His mother's voice was soft and filled with affection. It didn't make any sense. She should hate him.

"Mummy, please. You will burn yourself." Loki whispered desperately. He couldn't stand hurting his mother more than he did already.

"I am the most powerful sorcerer on Asgard, love. Do you think I cannot spell my skin not to get burnt when touching yours?" She asked with a hint of sad humour in her voice.

Loki couldn't stand it.

"I am a monster, mum. Please, I don't want you to remember me like this." Loki didn't know what he was saying anymore, but he needed Frigga to go away.

"You are my son, Loki. I heard what you said earlier, standing on the edge of the bridge. I am so sorry. But I promise we will make it right. Together." The Queen said with infinite patience.

"But…Jotunheim." Loki got out in between the sobs.

"No one is sending you to Jotunheim, darling. You don't have to worry." Frigga said with complete confidence. She never stopped gently stroking Loki's shoulder and back.

"But…the Allfather." Loki mumbled.

"Heimdall?" Frigga asked, changing her tone from motherly to queen-like.

"Yes, my queen?" Loki was surprised to hear the Gatekeeper's deep voice.

"Is it possible to travel in between the realms now?" Frigga asked matter-of-factly.

"No, it isn't. Someone took the sword only a moment ago." Heimdall answered simply.

"What?" Loki was confused. Without the sword, it wouldn't function. He couldn't be send to Jotunheim.

"You heard Heimdall. You know what it means, Loki. You are not going anywhere." Frigga gently brought her hand on Loki's cheek. He flinched at the touch, but he didn't open his eyes.

"Mother!" Thor's voice echoed through the scene as the Thunderer landed next to his family. The scene before him was unbelievably strange.

There was Heimdall, standing with an unreadable expression on his face. Odin was standing there as well, seemingly rooted to the spot. He was completely quiet and unmoving. In front of him, his brother was lying chained on the ground in fetal position while his mother was kneeling next to him and gently stroking his cheek. The strangest thing, however, was that his brother was blue.

"Mother. What is happening?" Thor uttered and hurried next to Frigga. He ran past Odin, not sparing him a glance, and knelt next to his mother. He saw that Loki kept his eyes tightly shut.

"It is alright, Thor. It will all be alright." There was something different in Frigga's tone of voice. Something new. It seemed as if the Queen was done with all of this.

"Father..what is he…?" Thor didn't understand Odin standing there, not reacting to anything unfolding in front of him at all.

"Your father is currently indisposed, Thor. I am afraid my spell petrified him to his current position. He will be unable to speak or move until I remove the magic." Frigga said as if this was an everyday occurrence. "We will deal with your father later, Thor." Frigga said more softly. Thor understood.

"Brother." Thor whispered. He managed to keep all horror or surprise out of his voice.

"Thor, go away." Loki whispered desperately. He didn't want his family to see him like this.

"Loki." Frigga's voice was soft and caring this time. "It is alright. We are not going anymore. Would you please open your eyes?" And she placed a kiss on Loki's forehead.

Loki opened his eyes.

They were radiantly red.

Thor thought he would flinch and step back yet he found himself unable to do so. He understood that his mother has also placed some magic onto him so that his reaction wouldn't confirm Loki's conviction that they were disgusted by his Jotun form. Thor wondered if Frigga really managed to think about everything.

"Mum?" Loki's voice was small and unsure, as if he was a child again.

"It's okay, darling. I am here and I love you." Frigga smiled.

"Oh, mum." Loki's red eyes watered instantly and he tried to raise himself up. He couldn't do it but his mother was quick to help him. Frigga lifted him up by his forearms and brought him into her soft embrace. Loki rested his head onto her safe chest and continued sobbing.

Thor tried to pet his brother on the back but his mother stopped him with her gaze.

Thor understood. He couldn't touch Loki without burning himself.

"Loki?" Frigga said and Loki raised his head from her chest.

"I love you no matter what form, colour or temperature. You are and you will always be my son. Do you trust me?" She looked Loki straight into his eyes. The redness didn't intimidate her.

"Yes." Loki couldn't believe that he actually said this word and meant it.

"Good. Your brother wants to hug you. He isn't skilled in magic as me and you so we should probably help him, what do you think?" Frigga winked at her younger son whose expression turned into confusion. Yet immediately, Loki felt a wave of warmth spreading through him. It was comforting and painless. Instinctively, he knew what it meant. He closed his eyes for a second and when he opened them again, his hands were back to their normal colour.

"Thank you, mum." Loki stared at Frigga with his usual, beautifully deep eyes.

"There is nothing to thank me for, love. It is your soul that is a projection of your beauty, not your skin or shape. When I look at you, I see your caring soul. No matter what shape it comes in. That is what matters."

"Oh, Loki." Thor was crying now. He finally embraced his brother who exhausted fell into his big arms as a rag doll.

"Thor." Loki said only. He felt safe and loved. For the moment, all of them forgot about Odin.

"Boys, I think it is time to go home." Frigga said after giving her sons a moment to find comfort in each other.

"What about father?" Thor asked and felt Loki shivering in his arms.

"I won't let him hurt you, brother. I swear." Thor said and Frigga smiled.

The Queen made a barely noticeable gesture with her fingers and Odin was immediately able to speak and move.

"Quiet." The Queen said and stood up.

"You lied to me. You promised me not to hurt our son and yet you condemned him to die on the cold grounds of Jotunheim. When I understood your plan, I felt helpless at first. I didn't know what to do. I begged our older son for help. Thor didn't hesitate to do anything it takes to save his brother. But at that moment I understood that only my power is a true match to yours, Allfather. And I knew that for the first time since we were united in the sacred ceremony thousands years ago, I had to stood up to you. And so I did. The sword needed to open the Bifrost is in my possession now; no one is travelling out of Asgard without my knowledge. Thor and Loki are going back to the palace now. Loki will keep the bracelets suppressing his magic until the Midgard events are sufficiently explained. He is to be constantly in the company of Thor. I hope these two measures to bring peace upon your worried soul that suspects that our younger son will attempt to bring Ragnarok upon us unless he is in Jotun dungeons. You will agree to this plan of action and present it as yours to the court of Asgard unless you want to be seen as a king who was overpowered by his Queen. Am I clear?"

No one seemed to be breathing when Frigga finished the monologue. Had a feather fallen on the Bifrost bridge, everyone would hear it.

"You would turn against me? You who always stood by my side? For all these years?" Odin's expression was pained and betrayed.

"No. I am doing this for the sake of all of us. Loki is our son, Odin. Had you carried on the sentence, our family would be torn apart and no one would be able to put the shattered pieces back together."

"No one commands the King."

"No. But the Queen has the right to suggest a more appropriate course of action."

Silence spread. Thor was still holding Loki in his arms. Loki was shaking but was absorbing in all the situation developing around him.

"Do as you see fit." Odin said after a moment and turned to leave.

"Just a moment." Frigga said and Odin turned back to face her. Frigga looked at Heimdall.

"Heimdall, you are here to bear witness on your king's sentence to your prince Loki. Odin, do you agree with taking the measures that I mentioned, abandoning all other punishments against Loki?" Frigga glanced back at Odin.

"Yes." Odin said only.

"I have heard the sentence. I will do my duty to Asgard and make sure that it is properly carried out." Heimdall said and with a quick bow to his king he walked away.

Without another word, Odin disappeared.

"Mother, this was…" Thor found himself lost for words.

"Get your brother safely to the palace, Thor. Find the bloody guards to remove the chains from his wrists. You heard what I said. You are to stay with Loki at all times. Is that fine?" Frigga sounded suddenly very tired.

"Of course, mother. It is much better than alright." Thor replied. Frigga gave him a proud smile and turned her attention to Loki. She moved towards her sons and knelt in front of them. She moved a messy strand of black hair out of Loki's face.

"Will you be alright, Loki?"

"I will be with my brother." Loki answered only.

Frigga's expression lightened up. "I am so sorry, Loki. I swear we will do it right this time." Once again, she gently kissed her son on his forehead. Then she stood up and walked towards the palace, leaving her biggest treasures, her sons, behind her. She was confident that they would be able to take care of each other now.

"Loki?" Thor asked his little brother, who was still leaning onto him.

"Yes, Thor?" Loki said, his voice weak but his tone strong.

"This was…quite something, wasn't it?" Thor grinned at his younger sibling.

"Indeed." Loki weakly returned the smile.

"I think we better do as she said." Thor smiled again. "I am going to carry you to the palace, alright? I don't want to hear any protests."

"I wasn't planning to say any. I just want to sleep." Loki replied with the trace of his old, mischievous self.

Thor stood up, keeping his brother close to his chest. He walked towards the palace to find the guards to remove the chains from his brother's wrists.

Loki let himself be carried by his older brother. He was too tired and confused to feel outraged by this gesture. He couldn't yet fully comprehend what just happened on the Bifrost. At one moment, he was ready to die to save himself from the fate worse than death. But when the situation seemed most hopeless, the light came in. His mother loved him no matter his Jotun heritage. To her, he was her son as much as Thor. She heard what he said about Midgard. Loki knew that he would have to explain all of this in more detail, but he knew that with the support of his family, he will be able to find the courage to do so. It won't be easy; living with his magic supressed in constant company of his oaf of a loving brother, but Loki was certain that in the end, it will be all wort it. It may be difficult to deal with Odin and the rest of the Asgard, but together they will be able to do it.

Loki closed his eyes and drifted into a peaceful slumber.

Besides, his mother was a badass.

So...this is the end of Part 1 of this story. I am sorry it took me ages to update this chapter.

There will be Part 2 that I will update here. It deals with Loki and the new situation he found himself in. So there will be a lot of brotherly interaction, Loki's interaction with some other Asgardians and Odin will also make appearances so that we can see if he truly is as heartless as he seems to be in this story (I know I am making Odin really cruel but I really wanted him to be like this in this story; I probably wanted to portray him in this way since his "Your birthright was to die" statement. So well...I guess I am on the team Revengers here ;) ) Also, the end is ready and it may have something to do with a certain badass Queen so well...I hope you keep reading.

Thank you so so much to those of you who kept reading for this long! I appreciate it very much.