Summary: The first thing Reborn wanted to do after coming back home was to hand his mission report – and sleep, not to see robed strangers circling Tsuna on his bed in the middle of the night and worshiping him. Apparently, he missed a lot of things. (Or that one time they found out Tsuna's Hyper Intuition were stronger when he was sleeping).

Warning: Dialog heavy and attempted humor.

Disclaimer: Katekyo Hitman Reborn! and all of its characters belong to Amano Akira.

There's nothing he wanted to do other than give his reports and sleep. He was tired, the last few months of his mission finally taking its toll on him. He considered sleeping in the day after, but with his arrival, he knew that his boss wanted his report first and foremost.

Reborn groaned, he wanted his sleep now.

As he arrived in front of his student's room, Reborn considered knocking (since it was midnight, the brunet was probably asleep). But decided against it and barged into the room like he owned it.

A dozen or so head snapped their attention to him at the rude entrance, and the sight that greeted him was what ultimately stopped Reborn from stomping into the room and kick Tsuna off of his bed.

A second passed, and then:

Reborn's exhaustion were wiped off of his face, and without wasting a moment, drew his gun and aimed it at the one closest to Tsuna – who was currently holding his student's hand in death grip. Why his guardians weren't in the room amazed him, considering there was a dozen or so people wearing a dark cloak – that suspiciously looked like something his fellow mist Arcobaleno wore –surrounding their boss.

He still couldn't comprehend why Tsuna wasn't even stirring in his sleep.

"Tell me one reason to not blow your head right here and I want any of you to start speaking. Now."

The threat was clear, yet none of the cloaked figures spoke.

Reborn cocked his gun.

"W-wait, Reborn-san! It's me!" One of the cloacked figure slid the hood off. Revealing a mop of silver hair.

"What the fuck are you doing with these weirdoes, Gokudera?"

"We will tell you! But, please, lower the gun..."

Reborn raised his eyebrow.

"The gun isn't going anywhere unless any of you start speaking. Actually, take off all of your hoods now,"

There was no resistance as one by one slowly slid their hood. It takes a lot of effort to not shot them out of spite; because Reborn recognized everyone in the room. Some of the former Arcobaleno were there, too.

"What the are you thinking gathering here like a fucking cult?" Reborn lowered his gun seeing that Tsuna wasn't in real danger.

Why was Tsuna still sleeping, anyway? Did his danger trigger dulled so bad he let a group of suspicious people enter his bedroom without detection?

"Language, Reborn. Besides we're not a cult. I'm here to confirm whether the rumours where true."

"I never thought I would heard that from you, Verde. Going out of your hole just for rumours?"

"But it is interesting, you see..."

By the time they finished explaining, Reborn was leveling a harsh glare to the gathered party consisting of Gokudera, Chrome, Verde, Mammon, Fon, Irie, Spanner, Fuuta, Squalo – how did he kept quiet all this time? –, and surprisingly, Jager.

How the man escaped his attention was beyond Reborn, but he blamed his sleep deprivation for his lack of foresight. He was going to ask what the second-in-command Vindice officer was doing here, but figured it wasn't worth his effort.

Some things are better left alone.

"So, let me get this straight. One day you decided to keep listening to whatever he was mumbling, in his sleep, and decided to believe it happens?" They were sitting in a half circle now, with the ever skeptic Reborn silently questioning their common sense.

There was a collective groan. "But it happened! He was the first one to find out Lal's pregnant! Everything he said has come true so far!" Was the passionate reply he got from Gokudera.

Reborn paused. "She's pregnant? When did that happened?"

"Two months ago," Was the automatic response he received from his colleagues. Fuck. What were they doing here – in his student's room, no less – whispering furiously like a group of gossiping housewives?

How did he missed something as crucial as Lal's apparent motherhood?

When did he get exempted from such informations?!

"That still doesn't dictate that he could predict the future. Are you even listening to what you're saying? You sound like an overly obsessed cult. What's with the robes anyway?"

"Do you want to wake up to a dozen pair of eyes staring at you?"

"Well, no. That's just fucking creepy."

"Exactly. We wear it just in case he wakes up in the middle of our session."

"That's even creepier."

There was a collective hum of agreement from the gathered crowd.

"Well... now that I thought about it, he never woke up..." Gokudera muttered.

"Nor does he remember any of it ever happening, do you reckon he's just sleep talking?"

"But he's always coherent about it, especially if we're being specific. I doubt it's just a normal occurance." Irie offered with a dangerous glint in his eyes.

Reborn raised an unimpressed eyebrow towards Mammon, who was being uncharacteristicaly silent. Out of all people gathered in the room, he was the only one who hasn't uttered a single word about the situation.

Reborn wasn't sure if it's a good thing.

"Well, Mammon? What do you have to say for yourself?"

Mammon waited until the hushed murmur died down before speaking; "He certainly make a good profit." then refused to say anymore even with the threat of a gun pointed directly on his forehead.

"You're... using my student... as a source of income, how?"

There was a snicker somewhere to his right, and Reborn belately recognized Yamamoto's sharp feature in the dimly lit room.

"You know that Italians takes pride with their Football team, or any sport, for that matter." Verde informed him with a flat tone.

"By the end of the first month – since we found out about Tsuna's talent, by the way –, Mammon had a whole interweb network of underground betting ring set up. Crazy how fast he worked, huh?"

Okay, he didn't think it went like this, but what the fuck?

"And Tsuna doesn't know this?"

"Nope!"

Reborn repressed the urge to facepalm because, none of this make any sense! And the longer he listened to them, the harder it is to believe their... claim. "I don't understand why I should believe what any of you are saying. As far as I know, this is just some elaborate trap set by dearest student of mine to get back at me for ruining his shampoo."

Silence, then; "Mother of God, that was you?"

Shocked gasps filled the room as they proceed Reborn's confession.

It was just a childish prank on Reborn's part, having changed the content of the shampoo bottle with blonde hair dye – mixed with too much conditioner to mask the smell. Tsuna did not suspect a thing – it takes at least fifteen minutes for the color to settle, and another hour for it to have a significant difference, and by that time, Tsuna was deep into an important meeting with their oldest allies to realize why most of them had passed out in the middle of their meeting.

The result wasn't pretty, because one of the allied boss had to be admitted to the mental hospital continuously mumbling: 'Primo', and 'God save us'. Apparently, he believed in supernatural and convienced himself that Primo had came back from the dead to pay retribution.

"What? You don't know?"

Most of them shook their head. "We never found out the culprit and Tsuna never told us anything."

Okay, so they didn't know and Reborn voulentarily told them himself. Great.

"Wait, you're telling me that this isn't a joke?"

General nods.

Okay, fuck, Reborn needed his vacation now, preferably somewhere far, far, away from Italy.

Yeah, that sounds like a plan.

"Guys, as much as I like to discuss Reborn's prank, don't you think this is an innapropriate place to do this?"

Ah, Dino, the voice of reason– Wait, what is he doing here? Actually, he didn't want to know.

They ignored Reborn's momentary lapse of attention and stared back at the sleeping brunet. He hadn't even stirred in his sleep. That was good. Thought every cultist in the room. Because Reborn found Tsuna's ability to sleep like the dead a bit unnerving, (if it was him he would have shot every one of them as soon as they stepped into his bedroom) he doesn't want to find out how Tsuna hasn't moved a single muscle yet.

"Don't you think it's a little late for that?" Chrome muttered quietly.

The gathered cultist – Reborn does not want to be associated with them, no, not at all – continued their discussion as Reborn backed away from them silently, he had decided right then that he'd noped out of that bedroom before any of them noticed his absence.

Cult was never his cup of tea. Especially one that focuses around his no-good student.

He'll let Tsuna take care of his own problem himself, thank you very much.

(By the time Reborn regretted not dealing with the problem himself, it was too late. Because Tsuna – his wonderful, oblivious student – never realized the growing numbers of his worshipers had spread all over Italy, and took it upon themselves to send him tons of gifts into the Vongola HQ.)

(He wanted to ask why they even bother to shower him with gifts, since Tsuna could practically obtain anything he wanted– never mind, that might be the point.)

(Tsuna thought of this as a good thing, because the crime rate had dropped considerably over the year. He still doesn't know how it happened, but then again, Tsuna never asked.)

(And by the time his foreseeing ability had gained him more worshipers from around the world – Mammon and his vast deep web connection were to blame for that –, Tsuna was – unknowingly – powerful enough to eradicate any illegal activities around the world three times over.)

(Tsuna remained oblivious to the growing Cult.)

(Reborn made his own prediction that several centuries later, Tsuna will be seen as a deity.)

(He wasn't wrong.)

AN:(This is my very first time trying to write something distinctively humor - though I prefer parody more - so tell me what you think, if you have time. I really appreciate every one of you for reading this.)

EDIT: Monday, October 9th 2017.

Fixed some minor mistakes and added a little detail in the story.

Edit: Thursday November 16th 2017.

(Reduced the amount of cursing courtesy of Reborn)

I would probably, probably (like 1 out of 1000 chances) make a side story for this. I'm not promising you guys anything, nor if it'll be fast if I indeed write a side story. For all we know I could have updated this a year later.

(you guys are really cool you know that? Cookies for everyone who reviewed! YAY. FREE COOKIES)