Hello, everyone! If you're reading "A Circle in the Sand," you know that I mentioned a new story in my last update. This thing has kept me from concentrating on ACitS as much as I'd have liked, but I did manage to wait until this one was finished before I started posting it. I'll post a new chapter every day, and hopefully this will keep you occupied while I work on ACitS.

As this story will prove, I'm a little obsessed with "fixing" New Moon. Seriously, it's my least favorite book out of the four. But I won't start a rant about it now. Instead, I'll show you how things might have happened if Bella had just been as observant as Stephenie Meyer kept saying she was.

Disclaimer: The characters belong to Ms. Meyer. This AU idea, and everything that happens in it, is all mine.

BPOV

The events of the last twenty-four hours played through my mind as I drove towards my job at the Newton's store. My birthday, full of embarrassment and, ultimately, pain and fear. Alice's disappearance. I hadn't seen my best friend in days. The distance Edward was putting between us. It was all connected somehow, but trying to find the answer felt like trudging through thick mud. Each time I thought I had the answer, the muck drew it back just out of my reach.

I pulled into the small parking lot at work, still lost in thought. The lot was almost empty, as was usual at that time of day. The arrival of my truck, ancient engine roaring, startled a flock of swallows into motion. My eyes followed their graceful swooping flight over and past the squat tan building where I earned my miniscule paycheck. Where one went, the others were quick to follow, I mused as the sight distracted me momentarily from my brooding.

As if the abrupt motions had jarred my mind loose from the confusion shrouding it, I put action and reaction into focus. The attack on my birthday. Alice, gone. Edward, hardly saying a word. I knew.

They were leaving. That single thought tore the blinders off my eyes and caused my foot to slam down on the brake pedal. No one was behind me, so I could sit and stare forward as the truth of my situation settled over me. The love of my life and his family, most of whom I loved more than any other person on this planet other than my parents, were leaving. I was as sure of that as I was of my own name. A small, hopeful side of me tried to shout that of course they would take me with them. Then Edward's face, solemn and more drawn than I had ever seen, popped into my mind's eye. No. They weren't planning for me to follow.

Somehow, despite my churning stomach and building headache, I managed to find a parking space and crawled out of my truck. Every movement ripped a hole in my middle until, by the time I made it into the store, I felt so raw and exposed that all I wanted to do was run back to my truck, scramble inside, and hide against the sudden harshness of the world.

Mrs. Newton manned the single open register, and she looked up with an expectant expression when I stumbled in. From the shock in her blue eyes and the way she hurried around the counter, I knew I must look almost as horrible as I felt.

"Bella, you look like death warmed over! Have you caught the bug going around?" she tutted over me. I noticed she didn't come close, probably afraid that I was contagious. That was a relief. I had no idea if I would break down completely from a single touch at that point.

In the normal course of things, I worked every hour I could get. This was the perfect opportunity given everything else going on in my life, though. "I guess I might have. I felt okay at school, but now I'm kind of nauseous and lightheaded." It wasn't a lie, and the weak rasping of my voice confirmed it.

Mrs. Newton shook her head and bustled around the counter. "I should have expected it. It's the same every year. You kids all get herded back into those closed little classrooms, and the bugs start spreading like wildfire. Well, you should go home then. There's no use spreading this farther," she instructed, shooing me away with her hands.

I gave a slow nod and began to turn, but stopped when she called my name. I looked back to see her holding out an envelope as far away from her body as she could.

"I almost forgot your paycheck, dear. Do try to feel better."

The smile I tried for was more of a grimace as my fingers closed around the thin paper. Looking at the snowy envelope dangling from my fingertips brought back the memory of the tiny papercut, which reminded me that my world was crumbling around me. I dragged in deep breaths, trying not to cry in front of my boss.

Thankfully, Mrs. Newton didn't comment. "Now get on home."

I nodded, a stiff mechanical tilt of my head, and made my way outside with my paycheck clenched against my side. Autopilot took me to the cab of my truck where I sat for several seconds trying to draw air into my aching lungs. I knew Mrs. Newton would become concerned if I sat there too long. I fumbled my key out of my pocket and jammed it into the ignition. The truck roared to life, and I backed out and pulled onto the road.

I didn't want to go home. Edward might stop by. The cynical part of me, the one that couldn't understand what he saw in me, told me he was going to say goodbye sooner or later, and what better place than my home? I couldn't stand dealing with the thought. It made my stomach clench harder.

The bank was a logical choice if I wanted to avoid going home. I always deposited my paycheck the day after I received it since the lone bank in Forks closed before Newton's did. But it was early enough that they would still be open. I turned the truck in that direction and did my best not to think. Thinking would lead to more destruction of my soul.

The drive to the bank from Newton Outfitter's location on the edge of town was a blur of nothingness. Without thinking much about it, I arrived. I parked outside the grey and white building with its large windows that were a painful reminder of another building, a home, with similar windows. I couldn't think of that, though, or I risked tearing the hole in my chest open so far that I would fall in.

The dim fluorescent lights of the bank felt blinding as I stepped inside, paycheck in hand. A single teller sat behind a thick glass window. She looked up from her crossword puzzle at my entrance, and her faded blue-grey eyes lit up with a smile.

"Bella! How nice to see you. I wasn't expecting you until tomorrow."

I tried to tilt the corners of my stiff lips up in a smile. "I'm taking the evening off work to take care of Charlie, Mrs. Johnson. I think he caught the bug that's been going around." The lie slipped out with surprising ease as I handed her my envelope through the slot at the bottom of her window.

She clucked a little as she took it. "Poor thing. That bug laid my Harry low a few weeks ago. It passed quick, thank goodness," she assured me with a small shake of her short blue curls.

I nodded to show I heard her, but my eyes were busy skimming over the deposit form as I filled it out. Something tickled the back of my mind and caused me to select a withdrawal slip as well. I entered the necessary information under the surprised gaze of Mrs. Johnson.

She raised her eyebrows when I handed her both slips. "Doing some early Christmas shopping?" she asked when she saw the amount I was withdrawing.

Thankful for the provided excuse, I nodded. "The Cullens were so generous for my birthday, and it'll be my first Christmas with my dad. I want everything to be perfect," I tried to say with as much cheer as possible.

Her eyes clouded and her mouth opened, but then it snapped shut again. Whatever she was going to say, I was sure I didn't want to hear it. I was very grateful when she counted out five one-hundred-dollar bills without comment. I avoided her sad gaze when she handed them to me.

"All done. Have a good evening," she told me. I gave her another forced smile as I stuffed the cash in my jacket pocket and headed back out into thin rays of sunshine, the first in days. I welcomed the warmth of sun on my face, although I shied away from examining why. Again, it was better to act without thinking. Thinking would lead to remembering, and that would lead to more pain.

Once back in my truck, I wasn't sure what to do. Part of me wanted to go to the Cullens' house, to prove to myself that I was wrong. Another part of me wanted to go home and snuggle down in bed, pull the blankets over my head, and hide. I did neither. Instead, I started the truck, made it out onto the road again, and drove.

At first, I paid very little attention to where I was going. Buildings began to sprout up around me, far more than Forks could boast. I was approaching Port Angeles. A quick glance at my fuel gauge told me I would need to stop soon, but I wasn't ready. I wasn't far enough away yet.

I tried not to look around as I drove, tried not to see the street that would take me to Bella Italia. As I turned my head to the right, a billboard caught my eye. Greyhound.

I made no decisions as I turned onto the advertised street. I made no decisions as I parked my truck and hopped out. I made no decisions as I grabbed my backpack, still on the bench seat. I made no decisions as I left the truck unlocked and the keys in the ignition. I made no decisions as I walked two blocks to the small ticket window.

I made one decision and bought a bus ticket to Portland. It ate up more of my cash than I would have liked, but it was necessary. Ten minutes later I was on a bus as it headed out of the depot onto 101. The further away I got with no strange interruptions despite the fine drizzle of rain now blanketing the landscape, the surer I became. They were gone. The Cullens had left with no goodbyes, no regret. They were gone from my life, and now so was I.

If I wasn't in Forks, I couldn't confirm anything. I didn't have to face losing the love of my life, of my existence, to a single stupid papercut. Didn't have to face long lonely days where the only people I wanted to see were nowhere in sight.

I huddled down in my seat, wrapped my jacket around myself to try and close the gaping hole where my heart should be, and closed my eyes to shut out the world. I wouldn't sleep, but I had no desire to make small talk with strangers while my world was falling apart. Unfortunately, I now had no distraction from the way my world was falling apart.

I spent the two-hour drive wallowing, and as I did, the pain changed. It morphed into a fierce anger. Why did it seem like he was always running away from me? He said he loved me, but even when we were so happy over the summer, sometimes it felt as if he was waiting for a reason to push me away or as if he expected me to leave. I tried to ignore it, but the feeling always lingered in the background as my body healed from the fiasco in Phoenix and school ended for the year. Our time together was blissful but desperate. It was as if we were trying to cram years of living into one beautiful summer.

If he had let the change happen in Phoenix instead of sucking out the venom James left in my system, none of this would have happened. Granted, I wouldn't be able to be near Charlie or Renee anymore, which would have been crushing in its own way. That abstract concept held little weight in comparison to the thought of losing him, though. If I was a vampire there would be no more arguments about birthdays, no disastrous parties where a papercut could send my immortal boyfriend into a frenzy of guilt and self-hatred. I was no fool. I knew that's what he was doing the last few days, even if I didn't want to admit it to myself. I should have predicted that something like this might happen. I didn't need Alice to tell me that Edward would overreact to the situation. Hadn't I been expecting it since the second I saw Jasper lunge towards me?

Edward said he loved me but wasn't willing to allow the one thing to happen that would have kept me with him for eternity. What did that even mean? Wasn't his love as strong as mine? Or did emotions become weaker when someone became a vampire, to the point where even love wasn't enough of a reason to stay with someone else forever? Were the Cullens really a family the way they seemed to be, or were the bonds they felt less than I ever imagined? Could it be that they were just together for protection's sake or to stave off the loneliness?

These thoughts and more captured my mind in a maelstrom as the bus moved along. The hum of the engine, quiet chatter of other passengers, and an occasional jolt from a pothole were the only indications that we were moving further away from Port Angeles. The steady movement of the bus changed so smoothly I didn't notice our decreased speed until the forward motion ceased. I opened my eyes and glanced out the window. Two rows of cars, headlights shining in the evening gloom, sat next to us. We had stopped at a traffic light. We were in the outskirts of Seattle. We must have crossed the Hood Canal Bridge easily, as well as Applewood Cove. That wasn't surprising given the time of day. Most people were at home with their families, making dinner and sitting down to eat.

I should have been home. I planned to make baked chicken with roasted vegetables for Charlie tonight. It's always such a challenge to get him to eat right. He was like a picky little kid who only wants peanut butter and jelly sandwiches or macaroni and cheese for every meal. Except in Charlie's case, he would be happy with pizza, fish, and beer.

Thinking about Charlie hurt, but the thought of losing Edward hurt worse. I had to try to outrun the pain. Charlie would never have understood because I couldn't explain what was going on. Like this past spring, he'd be better off this way. It was easier to shut off the pain, ignore both it and the anger I felt at Edward, the further away from Forks that I went. I knew it wouldn't last, but I welcomed the numbness. It wrapped around me as I pushed my emotions away, locking them into a box somewhere deep inside for as long as I could.

The bus continued with a jolt. I was able to see some of the downtown Seattle skyline through the windshield, even from my seat toward the back. A strange unease settled in the pit of my stomach. Once upon a time I would have been ecstatic to put Washington behind me, but now I desperately wanted to stay. The thing that made life in this dreary state worth it was going to be taken away from me, though, so what was the point?

It didn't take long after we entered the city to get to the bus station. I watched other passengers make their way to the front while a smaller group waited more or less patiently to get inside, the line snaking around my side of the bus. A short man with mousy brown hair caught my eye as he waited to board, and my breath hitched in my throat. The man could have been James' human twin, right down to the cruel sneer he gave an older woman who bumped into him.

There was no way I could be on the same bus as him. I scrambled to my feet, managing not to fall on my face, and made a beeline for the back of the line getting off. Seattle wasn't quite far away enough, but it would have to do for the night. I would find somewhere cheap to stay the night and continue in the morning. Or I could get a job waiting tables for a few days to earn some more cash so that I could go farther south. Surely there were places willing to pay under the table and ask no questions in a city like this.

I shuffled off the bus, head hanging so that I wouldn't catch the eye of the James doppelganger. The crowd around the station drew me in, a mixture of men and women in business suits and casual travelers like I seemed to be. I thought about purchasing another ticket now, but I didn't want to wait any longer than I had to in such an obvious spot in case—someone—came looking. Instead, I needed to find a safe place to spend the night and somewhere to eat. I wasn't going to make any decisions about either ahead of time, though. Decisions were dangerous, even if I could be sure my movements weren't being monitored.

Despite a mediocre breakfast I hadn't been able to choke down due to the tension and lunch that was barely picked over, I wasn't particularly hungry. I knew I would need some kind of fuel for my body to get through the next few days, though, so I started looking as I made my way down the busy sidewalk. I wasn't sure I would be able to force down much, my stomach still tied in knots of anxiety, but I didn't want to faint in the middle of an unfamiliar city because I ignored my body's needs, either.

The streets were crowded despite the encroaching darkness of dusk. I must have become too used to small town life in Forks. It felt as if everyone I passed was staring at me, even though I knew that couldn't be true. Still, I could have sworn I felt eyes on me even as I avoided meeting anyone's gaze, my own fixed on the toes of my shoes and the cracks in the sidewalk ahead of me.

I followed the scent of barbecue to a nearby shopping center. The thought of all that sauce and grease caused my stomach to churn. However, the menu posted outside of the restaurant listed salad, so I went inside. A few minutes later, I sat in a booth, my backpack resting beside me on the worn brown upholstery of the bench seat. I shoved my fork into lettuce and vegetables and brought it to my mouth, over and over. I made it halfway through my salad before my stomach lurched in protest. I reached out to pick up my glass of water, hoping that a sip would calm me enough to finish my food. A cold, hard hand clamped down on my wrist, halting the motion. I looked up into black eyes surrounded by wildly curly red hair.

"Hello, pet. Aren't you a little far from home?"

I recognized her, the female who was with James when their little group of three found us months ago in that field. Her voice surprised me, high and childlike despite the hiss I heard beneath the words. She bared her teeth in what a human observer might have assumed was a smile, and I felt shards of ice slide down my spine. I drew in a breath, but her fingers tightened even more on my arm.

"Don't think about calling for help. After all, what could these humans do against me? And wouldn't a fuss bring attention to that precious family of yours?" The way she sneered at me let me know that attention would not be a good thing for any of us, no matter what she wanted with me. "Now, why don't you pay your bill like a good little girl and then come with me."

It wasn't a question, and I knew I wouldn't be able to fight her. I pulled out my wallet with one hand, fished out a twenty, and left it on the table for the waitress to find. As soon as the paper fluttered onto the table, she dragged me away, her arm looped through mine like we were the best of friends. I thought of my backpack, still sitting in the booth, and my wallet that dropped onto the table when she pulled me away. Maybe they would be able to give Charlie some kind of closure once he started looking for me. From the sickening gleam in Victoria's hungry eyes, I doubted I'd be getting out of this one alive.

Well, what do you think? What's going to happen next? I guess you'll have to wait until tomorrow!