A/N1: This story does not have a Kotoko/Naoki happy ending. Do not read if that saddens you, offends you, or makes you write death threats in reviews.

A/N2: I do not own Itazura na Kiss.

A/N3: Final warning. NON-CANON. VERY MUCH SO.

The society magazines billed it as the "Wedding of the Decade", retelling the romantic story of the attractive lovers who met when their family firms merged the year before. Gossip in the back rooms told another tale, one that included the bridegroom being part of the deal, but speakers made sure not to say that too loudly near Chairman Oizumi.

Aihara Kotoko was not in attendance. She and her father had moved out of the Irie home months before, and she spent more nights than she could count crying herself to sleep in her new bedroom. Even Satomi and Jinko were unable to drag her away from it more than a few times. She was ashamed to admit the feelings of jealousy which engulfed her whenever she saw them with their boyfriends and began to refuse their invitations.

Thus she sunk into even further depression until Matsumoto Yuuko searched her out. She showed up a few days after the wedding. "Aihara, you must snap out of this. It is over and done with."

"How was it?" Kotoko asked her softly.

"Like a meticulously directed drama. So boring," she added with a sigh, for she too had held dreams of a happily ever after with Naoki. "At least if it had been you, the ceremony would have been lively."

"Yeah," Kotoko snorted despite herself. "I probably would have tripped going down the aisle!"

"That's more like it!" Matsumoto gave her a bracing slap between the shoulder blades.

Slowly color seeped back into Kotoko's world, and she realized that this time she had no choice but to get over Naoki. She recalled that her many earlier attempts to do so had ended in failure when he casually—and, in hindsight, cruelly—reeled her back into his orbit. She resumed working at her father's restaurant and mended fences with Kinnosuke, taking pains to make him understand that their relationship was solely platonic.

As she became more aware of her surroundings, she saw that her father's eyes revealed his sadness at the painful yet necessary separation from his longtime friend. She pondered how best to bridge that distance for him in gratitude for his constant loving support. As it turned out, one she would have deemed the least likely would help achieve that goal.

Walking home through the park, arms full of paperwork for the upcoming college term, the solution came to her—or, rather, ran over her. One moment she was trying to decide between two electives and the next she was face-down on the path.

"Sorry! I'm sorry! He got away from me—Kotoko?!"

"Yuuki-kun?" she asked incredulously. "And—Chibi? Get away!" She shoved at the massive head.

After settling the dog and collecting her papers—Yuuki stacked them neatly with corners aligned while she wiped off way too much canine saliva—they sat on a bench and made halting conversation. Avoiding all talk of the recent addition to the family, the boy shared news of his parents, whose subdued personalities were rebounding as they slowly accepted the marriage. Astonished that they had been in each other's company for so long without hurling insults, Kotoko invited him to drop by the restaurant one night. "Dinner will be on me!" she assured him.

It took several weeks for him to make an appearance, but he soon became a regular. After his initial visit, at which Kotoko's father had not only fed him to overflowing but sent boxes of food home with him, he started dropping by frequently. With the exception of that first meal he refused to be served "on the house" and insisted on paying his own way. Even Kinnosuke, who glowered at him darkly for a time, seemed to ease up on him. In this manner chains of affection between the two households were gradually reforged.

One slow evening, Yuuki observed Kotoko wrestling with an English translation. Snatching the paper from her, he began, with some of his past acerbity, "Why are you still taking the advanced course, baka?" It didn't take long before he announced that he, a middle school student, would tutor her, a college student. And so, Irie-Aihara tutoring sessions began once more, this time at the back table of the restaurant.

Every so often the two would spend time together away from the usual meeting spot, taking in movies or visiting festivals. When Kotoko ragged him about not having a girlfriend to invite, he turned the teasing back on her, forgetting for a moment the first years of their acquaintance. To his relief, she showed no sign of hurt as she explained that any extra time spent with Kinnosuke would give him renewed hope, and Taketo's periodic overtures were refused because she knew he was just having one of his tiffs with Ayako. "I don't want to have any more Matsumoto problems, because, between the two of us, she's scarier than her big sister!"

Kotoko, near the end of her fourth year of college, sighed frequently over her future. Not only had her extended mourning cost her a full term's worth of credits, but her friends would be graduating and she still had no clue of what she wanted to do with her life. She was in yet another funk worrying about this when Yuuki showed up at the restaurant and smacked her over the head with an employment flyer.

"What's this?" she asked, smoothing her mussed hair.

"One of those tour companies that caters to anime-crazy Americans," he replied caustically.

"So?" She raised a weirdly Irie-like eyebrow at him.

"These tourists want to experience Japan as they've viewed it on the television. Karaoke, cat cafés, purikura—you've dragged me to all of these in the past year, haven't you?"

"Well, yes." She stared at him. "Wait, you don't mean—"

"Look, thanks to me, your English is better than most. Go ahead, try it out! You're clumsy at just about anything but talking."

"Why, you little—" She wrestled him close, an arm around his neck. Only those nearby heard her say, "Thanks, Yuuki-kun," before releasing him with an extra squeeze and a kiss on the cheek.

It gave her great happiness when Mr. and Mrs. Irie were able to attend her delayed college graduation. Several months before, the younger Iries had moved to California where Naoki now headed up the newly-created United States office. With no need to be sensitive to Sahoko's or Chairman Oizumi's feelings, the parents found that they were free to resume openly their friendly relationship with the Aiharas.

The families became almost as close as before, with the exception that they no longer shared a home, and Mr. Irie even went in as silent partner when Kotoko purchased her own touring franchise. They enjoyed meals and outings, even taking holidays together when schedules permitted. Under a beach umbrella, Mrs. Irie expressed to her husband the joy she felt at being able to spend time with Kotoko once more. Watching the young woman and Yuuki in the shallow water, heads close together, (little did she know, discussing how the rise in gasoline prices were affecting tour rates), she sighed, "Just like brother and sister! Oh, if only…"

Mr. Irie, looking upon the same scene, pulled on his mustache and did not reply. Yuuki, in the middle of a second growing spurt, now topped Kotoko by more than a decimeter. If an onlooker was not aware of their respective ages, the tableau would appear entirely different from his wife's interpretation.

Sometimes Yuuki felt as if he spent his three years at Tonan High School in constant comparison with his older brother. Granted, he was in Class A, but there the resemblance ended. It was apparent that his demeanor was much more approachable than Naoki's, most likely due to his unofficial internship with Pandai and the frequent calls from Kotoko for business advice. If he heard one more time, "I can't believe you're so friendly. Not at all like your brother," he swore that he would—

Bzzzt! He pulled out his phone, but not before making sure that no teachers were around.

"Yuuki-kun! I just read in the Nikkei Shimbun that something's going on with Pandai stock! Should I be worried?!"

"Hush, baka!" He rolled his eyes. His father, refusing repayment for the business loan, had instead, at Yuuki's suggestion, purchased shares for her with the money. The teenager had been managing those and some other investments for her. "Legally, I can't say anything official. Just chill out and pretend you didn't hear anything."

"Oh, okie-dokie! You're the best! Love you! Bye!"

He shook his head as he tucked the cell away in his jacket pocket. "Was that your mysterious girlfriend that you won't introduce to us?" Kinoshita slapped him on the back as he and another friend approached from behind.

"Hey!" he protested. "Stop making up stuff," he growled while rubbing his neck with clouded eyes and a slight flush.

"Then why else do you refuse all the girls in school?" the other boy complained. "Like that Yashiro! Have you seen the size of her—"

"Shut up, I said!" Yuuki stomped away.

Mr. and Mrs. Irie returned from their semi-annual visit to the States barely two weeks before Yuuki's high school graduation ceremony. "The children are beautiful, but so placid!" the grandmother complained to Kotoko as she instructed her on the use of the camera assigned to her. "Not at all what I would expect you were like at that age!"

Kotoko laughed. "Well, considering the stick-in-the-mud parents they have, I'm sure they're doing the best they can!" She resumed checking out the new equipment; although by now well-accustomed to helping his mother immortalize Yuuki, she and technology usually did not get along swimmingly.

Mrs. Irie gasped in horror. "Oh, Kotoko-chan, I didn't hurt you with that comment, did I? You know that—"

"Not at all, Obasama!" she smiled easily at her. "That's ancient history! Yikes! Why did the screen go suddenly blank?!"

Compared to Kotoko's and Naoki's graduation ceremony, Yuuki's was uneventful. Several hours into the family after-party at the Aihara restaurant, Kotoko scooted over to be closer to him. "I'm sorry that your brother couldn't make it."

He shrugged. "Nah, it's okay. He's already given me my gift."

"Really?" She sat up straight. "What is it? A car? A trip?"

Yuuki laughed. "You remember when I told you to hold onto your Pandai stock?" At her nod, he continued, "After that old fart Oizumi's semi-retirement, Onii-chan used his added authority to separate the toy and video game sections of Pandai. So in a few days we'll both own a piece of it!"

"Ah!" she exclaimed, pointing. "Your notebook of toy ideas!"

"Yes," he smiled, "pretty soon I'll see which ones are worth implementing."

"Now all three of us have a business to run!" She grinned tearily. "And I never would have had mine without you!" she said as she hugged him, sniffing a little. Turning away, she took another sip of her drink. "Despite our rocky start, for these past few years you've been one of my closest friends, Yuuki-kun. I'll not be forgetting that. Now," she rose and looked over at the older generation, "before I get as trashed as them and turn any more maudlin, I've got to get myself to bed. Morning comes early for us executives, you know. Otosan will just have to find his own way home."

"I'll see you to your door," he offered as she stood, brushing off her protests that it was his party. "My parents are so soused that they won't even know I'm gone!" he assured her.

Kotoko sighed dreamily as they ascended the stairs to the apartment. "Tonan High School graduation! How long ago mine was! Those old memories..."

"Yeah," Yuuki laughed. "I remember Mom's video of you falling down the steps of the stage."

She covered her face with her hands. "Don't remind me! And what was worse, later that evening I got into such an argument with Irie-kun..." Her voice trailed off. "He ended up kissing me afterwards. I never found out why he did it, but the foolish little girl that I was then made such a romantic fantasy out of that one kiss."

Yuuki remained silent until Kotoko turned the key in the lock. "It wasn't a fantasy," he muttered.

"Hmm?" She turned to him, blinking, as she tucked an errant lock of hair behind an ear.

"Onii-chan did love you. And it wasn't just one kiss," he stated. When Kotoko stared at him, wide-eyed, he stumbled on. "At Romance Village, when you were napping under the tree—he kissed you again."

"I thought that was a dream!" Kotoko breathed as she touched her lips. She turned her face up to Yuuki. "But he still chose another." She shrugged and gave a small smile.

Yuuki's touch was light on her forehead as he brushed back the stubborn hair that had fallen free again. "He was confused and weak, but I'm not." He leaned in and kissed the startled young woman—Once! Twice!— and opened the door behind her to gently shove her indoors. "Now you've received two kisses apiece from the Irie men. Let me know if you want to break the tie." He laughed at her dumbstruck expression as he pushed up her chin to close her mouth. "There's no hurry," he reassured her. "After all, I've waited almost ten years!" Then, with a wide grin, he shut the door and clattered down the stairs, letting out a youthful whoop as he leaped over the last few.

I wonder how long it will take her to wrap her mind around that, he mused. Ah, well, I can be patient a while longer.

A/N4: I did warn you.

A/N5: A-a-and...this is the kind of plot you come up with when you over-caffeinate too close to bedtime and your brain jumps around at midnight like a gerbil on crack. Honestly, at first I went "Eww!" even though I have nothing against age-gap romances (Kimi wa Petto/Tramps Like Us is my favorite josei manga), but THESE characters?! Since I like to use a large amount of dialogue, this story was extremely challenging: I was forced to condense several years into a short enough tale to permit the not-quite-completely-resolved conclusion. And I needed that sort of finale because, frankly, except for knowing with absolute certainty that Mrs. Irie will drop over in a dead faint if (when?) Kotoko makes that choice, I have no idea what else would happen.

A/N6: This actually spun off from the longer (and more light-hearted) story that I'm currently working on, so you might see some similarities when I get it far enough along to upload. Canon ending on that one, however! (Working title: Reunion.)