A screen opens to reveal a very exasperated looking Jade. She's looking more done up than usual, with perfect curls framing her face and a stunning black dress that reveals a suggestive amount of cleavage, but she scowls at the camera as if she was being forced to address her audience of viewers.
"Alright losers, yay I'm back. And here today to film another 'What I love' video. See, I made this pretty little sign." Her snarky voice drones as she holds up a rather elaborate poster, complete with red "paint" stains around the border.
"WE, WE made that pretty little sign." A voice suddenly calls from behind the camera.
Jade's eyes narrow as she glances to the opposite side of her room where Beck was sprawled out on her bed, playing with one of her pillows.
"Thanks for the input, Beck." Jade groaned with a roll of her eyes. She was already regretting her decision to try and film when her boyfriend was in one of his clingy moods. She turned back to the camera and grimly explained, "That was my boyfriend, Beck. He's taking me out after this so don't mind him if you catch him walking around in the back of the frame."
"Sup." Beck suddenly greeted with a wave of his hand, jumping off Jade's bed to move next to his seated girlfriend. "That's right. I'm taking my little lady out for dinner."
"Yeah, don't call me that." Jade snapped, rolling her eyes again. "Go play." She instructed, pushing Beck away from her. Shrugging, Beck began to walk around Jade's room, stopping every so often to peer at a gory specimen in a jar or look at one of Jade's posters.
Ignoring her boyfriend, Jade began, "Okay, one thing that I love is the movie, 'The Scissoring.' Best movie ever made. Seriously, the first time I saw that film I -
"Hey Jade, why don't you tell your followers about why you love butterflies so much." Beck interrupts abruptly.
Jade turned slowly in horror, only to find her boyfriend standing in front of one of her many butterfly collections hung on her bedroom wall.
"I do not love them." She hissed, her eyes narrowing in warning.
"Yeah, you do." Beck continued, ignoring Jade's furious glare. "She loves butterflies, guys." He assured the camera, waving around her films studies notebook for emphasis which sure enough was covered with a butterfly print.
"Put that down, Beck." Jade ordered.
"Not till you tell us why you love them so much."
"Oh, I don't know." She cried exasperatedly. Curse her boyfriend and his unrelenting attitude.
Beck only raised his eyebrows at her, a coy smirk appearing on his face.
Huffing, Jade conceded, "I just think they're kind of tragically beautiful. Like, they have to spend all this time as an ugly little caterpillar, but eventually they transform into something beautiful, only to die like a month later."
"Morbid." Beck muttered, pulling a face.
"Yeah well, that's me. Anyway, as I was saying, the first time I saw The Scissoring-"
"Hey Jade, I think you're just as beautiful as a butterfly." Beck intervened again, causing Jade's jaw to drop partially open in shock.
"You think I'm as beautiful as an insect with an incredibly short life span? Thanks, babe." She grunted sarcastically.
"Okay, bad comparison. I just think you're beautiful. Gorgeous actually." Beck declared earnestly.
Jade had to bite back a smile (she had a reputation to protect after all) and once more turned to face her camera. "I don't know what's wrong with my boyfriend, viewers. I've been toying with the idea that he was dropped on his head as an infant. I suppose we should try and be patient with him."
"RUDE, Jade." Beck squawked, and before Jade knew what was coming, a soft pillow collided with the side of her face.
"You did not just do that." Jade whispered aghast, anger boiling over as she whipped around to glare at him. "I am going to MURDER you, Beckett."
The screen goes black.
The screen resumes, this time with Jade looking rather unruffled. Her hair was no longer neatly curled and framing her face, but now rather messy. Her meticulous black outfit was also now rumpled, and a red bra strap was sticking out against Jade's pale collarbone (something Beck didn't want to mention, but he was sure Jade would be angry when she later realised this).
"Okay. I don't remember what I was talking about so moving on. I also love –"
"Hey Jade, what do you keep in all these drawers?" Beck asked, opening one only to find a pile of textbook, study notes, and pens. Sometimes Jade was such a nerd. If he was making a "What I love" video, this would be the first thing he mentioned.
"Do not look in my draws, Beck." Jade snapped, her eyes not leaving the camera. "I also love roller derby. One time I forced Beck to come with me to a rally and it was honestly the most epic night."
"Jade, you got into a fist fight." Beck called out from somewhere in Jade's room. He was still rummaging around through Jade's various belongings, happy to have a bit of a snoop into Jade's private life.
"Well, that was because you were staring for too long at one of those skanks." Jade shoots back.
"You were the one who made me go to watch it with you. And I thought you just said you had fun!" Beck pointed out, his face suddenly appearing on the screen. Beck too looked like he'd been in a rumble. His usually flawless hair was dishevelled and his clothes were crinkled, but he wore a wide grin on his face as he looked teasingly at his girlfriend.
"I also love fights. Especially when I'm in one. Especially when I win."
Beck rolled his eyes playfully and resumed his inspection of Jade's room.
"In fact, what I love the most about fighting is that you can…"
Jade's rant was once again cut off, this time by the incredulously excited voice of Beck who suddenly gasped, "Whoa, baby."
Jade glanced to the corner of her room to see what Beck was up to now, only to find him twirling around a pair of her very black, very see through, lace-trimmed underwear.
"PUT THOSE DOWN." Jade screeched, her cheeks turning ablaze in embarrassment as she lunged out of her seat.
The screen momentarily went black again and resumed a few seconds later with Jade now seated onto of Beck's lap. Beck looked quite content with this situation and was grinning rather dazedly up at his girlfriend, as if he was in a deep fantasy.
"Okay. Sorry about all the interruptions. Beck was being a nosy jerk so I've banned him from walking around my room. He's going to sit here like a good boy and BE QUIET."
"Jade promised that if I behaved she'd wear the –"
"SHUT IT." Jade yelled, cutting him off.
Beck grinned cheekily and battered his eyelashes innocently. Jade snorted at this action causing her boyfriend to grin some more.
"I also love… Beck, why are you kissing my neck?"
"You love when I kiss your neck." He shrugged, not stopping his assault on her exposed skin.
"Beck, this is not the right time." Jade cried, exasperated.
"Jade, this video series is about things you love, right?" Beck suddenly questioned, pulling away to stare directly into Jade' eyes.
"Obviously." Jade yelled. "Honestly, Beck. You helped me make the sign for this segment, remember?"
"So, why haven't you told your viewers about what you love more than anything in this world?"
"And what's that?" Jade asked against her better judgement.
"Me."
The silence that ensued was nerve wracking.
"I hate you."
"No you don't. You love me."
"So much."
"Liar liar, pants on fire."
"I'll set you on fire in a minute." She seethed.
Beck was struggling to keep a straight face. Jade had shifted on his lap so she was now glaring directly into his eyes. In Beck's opinion, she looked adorable.
Perhaps that was why he momentarily forgot all about the camcorder recording them and pulled Jade's lips to his own in a heated kiss.
"Say you love me." He begged, pulling away for breath.
"Hey, that's my line." Jade weakly protests.
"Please." Beck urged with a little pout.
Jade couldn't resist Beck's puppy dog eyes, something he was well aware of. "Fine. I love you. You insufferable, fluffy haired, Canadian jerk." She muttered.
"Love you too, babe." Beck beamed, and unable to resist, he leaned forward to re-meet Jade's lips with his own. His hands began to shift lower and lower down her body, till suddenly, Jade pulled back and yelled, "This video is over," as she fumbled around for the remote.
The screen went black again, but not before the camera catches Jade reattaching her lips to Beck and a flash of black lace appearing from behind Beck's back.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THIS IS. Sometimes I get ideas at 1am and just start writing... Anyway, if you somehow enjoyed the sheer randomness that this story is, please leave a review.