Disclaimer-Passions and the song aren't mine

Summary-Liz, snooping through the garage, runs across an old CD of Eve's, which reveals some things about her older sister's past to show that Liz wasn't the only one to go through Hell.

Paradise

T.C. was coaching some students, Eve was at the hospital, and Simone and Whitney were elsewhere. With some regret, Liz realized that her only pastimes were torturing Eve, seducing—and failing at it—T.C., and helping Whitney and Chad evade Simone. With all of them out of the house and Liz with nothing to do, the young woman was bored.

She sighed. She missed Brian/Antonio…she missed him a lot. She remembered their times together on St. Lisa's before Diana, or Sheridan, had come into the picture. But now, Sheridan was drifting back and forth between Luis and Antonio, and Liz could see no future with Antonio. And Tom…she felt nothing with Tom.

Restless, Liz got up from her bed. She lived in the garage, so she might as well explore it.

Her hand reached the top shelf and felt along it. Suddenly, something crawled over her hand.

Shrieking, she ripped her hand back, the box she had been fingering falling to the floor.

She checked her hand for bug or blood, and then knelt on the floor to pick up the contents of the box.

It was a stack of CDs, old ones. She could see CDs of the Turtles and the Beach Boys and the older stuff of U2. She picked them up and straightened them one at a time, putting them in neatly.

She picked one up, and the title caught her eye.

Eve's Mix

Liz pushed the box away and looked at the CD. So, her sister had made a CD. But it looked like there was only one.

She turned the CD over to look at the list of song. The last one caught her eyes.

Paradise

"Paradise, eh?" Liz muttered. "I see she didn't have much of sad time without me like she claims." Liz straightened up and brushed dust off her skirt. "Let's just see how much of a paradise she lived in."

Liz walked through the door that linked the house and garage and went to the living room, where the Sound System was.

Liz took the CD out and pt it into the CD player. She hit Play, waited a few seconds, and set it for the last song.

A slow, ballad-like piano and cymbals intro started playing. Liz blinked. It sure didn't sound much like paradise music. Her thoughts were cut off as Eve started singing.

Once upon a year gone by

She saw herself give in

Every time she closed her eyes

She saw what might have been

Well, nothing hurts

And nothing bleeds

When covers tucked in tight

Finally when the bottom drops out

She forgets to fight

To fight

And it's one more day in paradise

One more day in paradise

As darkness quickly steals the light

That shined within her eyes

She slowly swallows all her fear

And soothes her mind with lies

Well, all she wants

And all she needs

Are reasons to survive

The day in which the sun will take

Her artificial light

Her light

And it's one more day in paradise

One more day in paradise

It's one more day in paradise

One last chance to feel all right

All right

(Instrumental Music)

Don't pretend to hold in

Just let it out

Don't pretend to hold it in

Just push it out

Don't you try to hold it in

Just let it out

Don't you try to hold it in

Hold it in

(Instrumental Music)

One more day in paradise

One more day in paradise

It's one more day in paradise

One last chance to feel all right

Once upon a year gone by

She saw herself give in

Every time she closed her eyes

She saw what could have been

Liz was shocked. She replayed the song, this time reading the written lyrics inside the CD cover. She couldn't believe it…this was the utopia she had imagined Eve had lived in?

As she closed the lyrics, booklet, she saw a small edge of a photo dropping out of the front page. She turned the booklet upside-down and took the photo out.

It was a picture of her and Eve jumping rope side by side, when she was 5 and Eve was 10. Liz remembered the day they took the picture. The Sandbournes had taken them out on a 4th of July picnic at the boardwalk. Eve and Liz had brought along their jump ropes, and they'd played together.

Scrawled under the picture was a small message from a 10-year-old Eve.

Me and my lil' sis, 4th of July. Love ya, Liz!

The door suddenly opened, and Eve walked in. Liz looked up guiltily as Eve stopped in her tracks.

"What are you doing with that CD?" Eve whispered breathlessly.

"Learning some unexpected truths," Liz said. She raised the photo to show Eve. "You kept this picture."

"Yes, I did." Eve took off her coat and laid it on the couch. "And there's also a letter hidden in the back cover. It was my letter saying that I would come home to get you."

"Why didn't you send it?"

"I did. Mom and Dad sent it back, with a note saying that you were gone and not to write again."

"And when I came to see you?"

"That note came just a few weeks before you came. I was so upset that I used drugs to block out my pain. So much, in fact, that I missed my chance to get what I wanted…my sister."

Liz stared at Eve for a long time. "Was it really as bad as the last song said?"

"Paradise is my personal song. Life before T.C. was Hell. I was a druggie, a whore, and the mother of a dead baby. Julian ripped me up like yesterday's newspaper. I was alone and penniless. But that was nothing compared to what Dad did to you. Liz, I don't expect you to forgive me…"

She was cut off as Liz hugged her.

"We're Hell's playthings," Liz said. "We have to forgive each other if we're to live again."

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