[2]

Awake My Soul

"I do not kill with my gun. He who kills with his gun has forgotten the face of his father. I kill with my heart." ~The 3rd Gunslinger's Creed from The Dark Tower

Rin should have guessed Shura would be blowing him off in regards to something as important as this. It wasn't fair! Just wasn't!

How could he just stand still in wait when something possibly very wrong was going down? The agitated demon twin decidedly ended the call and pocketed his phone after moving up the strap of his sword bag on his shoulder.

"See you later," he breathed the words to Konekomaru before picking up the pace toward the old boy's dorm, where he stayed with his brother. Rin had the hunch that just maybe he might find something. Finding Yukio passed out cold in bed would be amazing.. he could hope that, right?

Realistically speaking, the older twin also knew how much as a creature habit, Yukio was always, always, prepared for everything he does. He can't go anywhere first without a checklist for all the required stuff. It still amazed Rin that his younger twin had a desk drawer full of back-up eyeglasses. For someone who hated having to wear glasses, he thought it funny that Yukio had so many. That, or the other time his younger had ordered three large boxes of his favorite energy drink.

Well, except until just recently, Mr. Four-eyes had not been acting as predictably. Rin really did not have a good answer as to why, other than his brother had been stressing over everything way too much.

After passing through the doors of the dorm, he backtracked over to the mess hall and the kitchen to check, nothing – not even a note. The bathroom they also use, again nothing. He finally burst into his dorm room, really hoping to see someone, but again.. nothing.

"Aww.. for fuck's sake," Rin growled, breathing heavily. He clenched his fists, wondering what he could do now. With a sigh, he dropped his sword on his bed, then went back to his original idea to see if Yukio actually had packed any of his stuff. If he hadn't, then maybe he was kidnapped.. somehow, with Shiemi.

Maybe.. he was here… Yukio's side of the room appeared very organized and clean, with not even a wrinkle to be seen on his bed cover. The top of his desk was cleared also, and the books at the end of his desk under the window were stacked up very neatly. The computer was turned off and the mouse and keyboard pushed up under the monitor. Honestly, he never paid close attention to how Yukio's side of the room looked earlier to know if that was how it always had been.

Rin!

The older Okumura twin turned at the sound of his name. He suddenly realized his familiar wasn't around either.

Rin! You're back. Yukio locked me out. He didn't even give me any food… so huuungry..

He felt Kuro rub up against his leg before jumping up on Rin's bed. In a split second, Rin snatched up Blacky and held him at eye level. He was hungry too, but locating his brother was far more important right now. "Yukio was here? What did he tell you? Where did he go?!" he uttered the questions all in one breath.

Yeah.. he was here. He looked stressed out… but that's not really new, Kuro rumbled, the confusion evident in the cat sith's tone.

"But did he say anything?"

Nothing I could understand. He told me to get out and then locked the door to your room, he reminded Rin.

"Mhh… well, according to Shura, he's gone missing now," Rin moved Kuro on his shoulders, then ran a hand through his hair, sweeping the long, dark bangs away from his eyes.

Did Yukio run away?

"I dunno… but sometimes.. he does that," Rin thought out loud, knitting his brows as he did. "Plus Shiemi's missing too."

He used to know a lot more about Yukio when they were kids, but after they entered middle school - or more like, by the time Rin got to middle school - he didn't really see much of his younger brother anymore. Of course, him being held back a grade while Yukio advanced up a grade didn't help much with that. When he would ask the other monks at the monastery about Yukio's whereabouts, they had said that he was helping out with an afterschool club, or attending a cram school. Then there were those other times when they looked worried, when Rin was back home for dinner and Yukio wasn't. He didn't think too much about it then, because they were teenagers wanting to test more and more of their freedoms.

It wasn't until Rin started at True Cross Academy himself that he realized how much he had not noticed about Yukio. How much of what Rin was told had been some kind of cover for the training his younger twin was subjected too? These stories and lies really amazed him at just how much of the line of work as an exorcist was hidden under a shroud of secrecy. It must be such a hassle to not be straightforward when you want to be. Trying to think about all the legalities flat out gave him a headache. So he didn't.

A short chime from his phone caused Rin to jump as his heart skipped a beat. The demon boy whipped it out to see who the text was from.

Shima.

…

Not his brother. But why would it be? He's never really gotten one from Yukio before.

Shima had said his phone had died, and otherwise been caught up in getting his hair touched up.

Rin bluntly swore out loud at how stupid of a reason that was. He had a very serious situation here, and what the pink-headed wimp was doing was… was so.. ridiculous! It took Rin a whole two minutes to calm down before he could read the second message. Kuro promptly decided Rin's bed would be a much safer place, away from demon boy's fuming flames, and leapt for safety there.

Fortunately, Shima's responses to his texts weren't nearly as vexing, but they didn't give him much hope either. Shima didn't know where Yukio was this time.

Annoyed by the lag time with the texts, he clicked the call button to discuss this matter directly.

"Hey," Rin started.

"Yeah?"

"I'm serious, Pinky… where is Yukio?" Rin asked again, with added emphasis in the tone of his voice. "Because Shiemi is missing now too!"

"Wow… really?"

Rin sighed, not liking the sound of that response either. To think that he had faith in him. "Yeah.. really!"

"So they are both missing at the same time? Do you think they.. eloped?"

"I totally think they eloped!" Rin agreed, "But that's beside the point. I want to know why, or where... or if they really are just in trouble."

"But then, that means you don't think they did..?"

"Yeah.. it's just so… sudden. It's not like Yukio to just.. act on impulse," Rin, for a moment, started to second-guess himself. Because he was the twin who rushed into things head-first with his flames blazing.

"Well, I hadn't received any further orders to follow Okamura-sensei after he had been in the hospital, to know for sure," Shima sounded like he was being truthful at that point.

"Wait… you were spying on him?"

"Sir Pheles was curious," Shima sighed. "Your brother's been doing some scary stuff."

"So you're the one who told him about the dangerous training? How come you didn't tell me?!"

"Hey—"

"I mean, just what.. what is it that he—"

"Look, Rin—"

"He doesn't even want to tell me anything!"

"It was because I was warned not to tell anyone about the assignment. But now…" the double spy's voice took on a more solemn tone as he nearly spoke at a whisper. "His behavior doesn't make any sense. Your brother was literally risking his LIFE.. repetitively."

"What..?"

"Before you guys went to Aomori, he jumped off a building, Rin!" Shima continued, now a couple octaves louder.

"The fuck..?"

"And not in a stunt double kind of way. Your brother .. he's NOT okay…" Rin could tell from the sincerity in the spy's voice he was not kidding.

"Wh- why is he?"

"Testing his limits..? Hell if I know… but I wouldn't be surprised if Okamura-sensei had just snapped.. and kidnapped Shiemi!"

"Testing his limits? Why?"

"Feh.. ask him the next time you see him," Shima more or less blew him off too.

"Right…" Rin snorted, and otherwise just hung up. This phone conversation was only further agitating him. He clenched his teeth, wondering just how much shit Yukio had gotten himself into. Mephisto also thought his older twin was working far too much, and asked him to take it easy during their last mission. That was the first in a long time that Rin actually agreed with their jackass guardian. Regardless, Ron always had an instinctive drive to worry about the well-being of Yukio, no matter what (even though Yukio was smarter, and even taller, than him).

But to think that his younger took off with Shiemi? That left him feeling so twisted up, especially if Shima backed up that possibility. Was there more going on that they were keeping secret? If only he had something to prove this suspicion.

Rin turned around and walked to Yukio's wardrobe closet by the doorway for a quick look. He was a little surprised to see the long, black exorcist coat there, as was Yukio's leather ammo apron. But the gun holster was gone, which was expected since the younger Okumura never goes anywhere without his guns (the chicken). His winter coat and snow boots where also missing. Rin furrowed his brow and pursed his lips. His brother was outside somewhere. Did he go back out by that lake to look for Hachiro?

No, that didn't make sense.

Growing restless with not knowing anything, Rin came to the conclusion to go to the supply shop. Maybe, maybe he might gain more insight on the situation from what Shiemi's mother may know.

He grabbed his sword to leave, when Kuro questioned were he was going.

"I want to check something… something's not right," Rin muttered, not going into the details. He pulled his shoes back on, then picked up Kuro to take to the kitchen. "Don't worry, I'll get something for you to eat first."

It really hurt to breath again, as Yukio slowly ascended the final flight of stairs. Five flights of stairs hadn't been such an issue before, but now he was completely winded. Did the strain it took for his body to recover really sap that much energy? He quietly hoped so, because the troubled Okamura twin wasn't ready to accept that he had gotten out of shape. The last thing he wanted was to walk into his destination gasping for air and trying to keep from throwing up.

Yukio went to this stairwell of one of the academic halls on the True Cross campus because of its secluded location. Now standing on the platform at the top of the stairs, he transfixed his gaze on the locked door that led to the roof. Just had to steady his breathing and psych himself up that this plan was going to work. He had been spinning tall tales ever since he was eight, just to keep his exorcist training a secret from those who shouldn't know.

The mature fifteen year old closed his eyes, momentarily remembering how being in a place like this brought him security. Things were not as easy for him back in middle school as they were now. Somehow, being as smart as he was and the reputation he had, the older punks made him easy pickings.

As if the nickname 'Four-Eyes' wasn't enough, they also called him 'Yokai' due to his pale complexion and sickly disposition. Without his protective brother around, he had to do what he could to lay low and to slip in and around everyone, like a ghost. He had to learn how to stand up on his own, to fulfill his promise to Father Fujimoto by becoming a strong exorcist. Yukio always had to be on alert for bullies threatening him, demons teasing him, or even other girls just being way too nosey or flirtatious.

Yukio found refuge from everyone (even his brother, if he was lucky) by hiding in the uppermost level of the stairwells in his high school during his lunch breaks. There, he lost himself in a different text books from his exorcist studies, or on medicine and pharmacology. His high school life became a lonely one, only interacting just enough with others enough to get by. They often thought he had to leave early because he was sick, or a had another doctor appointment for treatments.

In reality, it was because he was called by the Order to investigate paranormal activity. It was ironic that back then, he used his weakness to hide who he really was from his classmates and his brother. Now, it was his enemy.

The saying 'the more you learn, the less you know' became more true with each passing month after Fujimoto had passed. Yukio was not so sure about the reasons that he had been told before. Reasons, or lies. It took one slip of the tongue from Shura when he was thirteen to help him see a glimpse of the charade they lived in.

But why was his brother spared to be raised as a weapon?

And for who?

Yukio gritted his teeth.

A weapon he would also be, but for his own nefarious purposes.

The twin son of Satan opened his eyes with his new resolve. It was not like before. He knew more on how to control his 'demons'. He just had to keep resisting their temptations to give in. Like his foster father, Yukio finally accepted the reality that he was being strongly influenced by Satan's will, or something, awakening his true self. While he was not like Rin, he had no safe guard from his paternal lineage either.

He pulled out the key that would gain access to Illuminati headquarters, and took a step toward the door to unlock it. After passing through, the Okumura twin found himself in a large room that was dimly lit. It looked more like a control room with rows of monitors above a counter on each side, displaying different views of other rooms or streams of data. It felt cooler, and held a stuffy, musty smell. Of course he would not walk into a lobby or reception area. That would have been too easy.

"Ah… hello," he heard the woman as she stepped out from behind another console. Her face held no emotion as she acknowledged him, her eyeglasses reflecting back the light of the monitors. This authoritative woman with an almost white streak going through her hair had never formally introduced herself, nor had he heard yet on who she was. He only knew she was a high ranking officer. "This comes as a surprise, Okumura Yukio."

"Yes… I have decided.." he started softly, his voice tone becoming louder in his effort to sound more sure of himself. "To join the Illuminati."

"So you have," the woman kept some distance from him as she spoke. "Does anyone know that you are here?"

The eye contact she held had shifted to someone beyond him. Yukio did not turn, but through his peripheral vision he saw the guards on each side as they approached.

"Yes. I made certain I was not followed," he answered. Yet, she didn't seem entirely convinced from the look on her face. Perhaps it was because their favorite double spy was just that good.

"Well then, please hand over your firearms," the four-eyed head lady motioned to him.

That request reminded Yukio, in an unsettling way, just how much 'they' knew about him.

He carried the twin pair of 9mm glocks not just for protection, but because they honestly suited him well for the meisters that he chose. Sure, other weapons like swords required close combat, and he never felt safe or effective enough using them. This was something Shura teased him about, further backing up her reason why she called him a four-eyed chicken. He made it a point afterwards to prove that he was just as effective with his guns as she was with her demon sword. And as a doctor, he agreed with his father's reasoning that guns covered more ground, more effectively. They were like glorified syringes, administering medicine in the form of bullets to those affected.

..'You had always been walking the path that your foster father had set for you'...

Did I really want to be like him?

The stern woman repeated her request, quickly redirecting his focus. "I said: hand over your guns."

Yukio finally complied by unbuckling the leather straps of his hostler, and handed that with the guns to one of the tall, burly guards.

Once the guard pulled one of the guns out, he handed it over to her. The head lady smirked, holding it up and pointing to the insignia etched into the barrel. "Ah.. these are from the Knights of the True Cross. I take it you have not formally resigned yet?"

"No, but..." Yukio quickly formulated his next response to deter her suspicions. He kept his answer simple, with the assumption that they already know the more well-known facts about himself. "My foster father had given them to me when I turned twelve… I've held onto them for sentimental reasons now."

She nodded, handing the gun back to the guard. "Hm. I just want to confirm a few more things first," the light shining from the lenses of her glasses when she stepped closer. "Why have you decided to join the Illuminati, now? I ask, because the information we had gathered from you earlier did not show any possible indication."

Finally, a question he felt more prepared to answer. This type of answer was one he had thought over carefully, because he didn't want to risk breaking the Morina's Contract that Lightening put on him. "Yes, you're right… it wasn't an easy decision to make. However, that was before I realized something… like why I was trained to replace Father Fujimoto in the event something were to happen to him."

The head lady crossed her arms as she listened, her face showing little emotion.

"What concerns me the most is why the True Cross believes that my brother is their best weapon," Yukio explained, his voice even and held steady eye contact with the woman. His reasons were chosen to fuel his purpose, even though she acted like it meant little to her. "His flames are not truly fueled by Satan. Rin has been told repetitively, warned in fact, to not unleash his full power or he will be executed. Regardless of that, my brother is afraid of Satan and what destruction He possesses."

"Yes… it's rather apparent that both of you are afraid of His power."

Her taunt struck him, but he wasn't going to let her know just how much. "Rin may be my brother, but he does not understand his weaknesses. Even though he is a full-fledged demon, he still has the heart of a human. If Sir Pheles wishes to use Rin as a weapon against you, I can be your counter measure."

"In that case, would your heart be aligned with our mission?"

Yukio did not want to respond that question directly, hoping that his own conclusion may suffice. "I am my brother's key to unlocking Satan's power. But as long as we are kept separate, then Rin's demon heart will not awaken. It's possible Sir Pheles is aware of this, and that is why they have not explained anything to either one of us about what is going on."

"Hmm," she smiled with an oddly amused grin. He decided that was the impressed reaction that he was trying to achieve. "You are a perceptive one."

"The Knights have right to be worried about us…" Yukio said, pressing his lips together for a moment before continuing. Yes, all he had to go by were educated guesses. But not knowing if he was really right in thinking that way was driving him mad. He just knew one thing for certain. "My own power is awakening."

"I heard."

"There's no doubt that the Order would restrain me once they realized it… but Sir Pheles hasn't said anything. I'm sure he knows…" Yukio paused, thinking again about when Lightening brought him in front of the Vatican officials, with those questions about Toudou. That possessed individual deeply scared him in a way he couldn't describe, but if those officials thought he would tell them how he really felt about that encounter, they were wrong.

"Lucifer said he could awaken my dormant powers."

There. He said it, even though his heart still resisted the very idea, and he held his breath waiting for her answer.

"Very well then," she smiled, but in a manner that didn't seem as reassuring. "In the time being, please go with them until further instruction."

Yukio nodded, somewhat understandably. He did just walk-in unannounced afterall. The handcuffs, however, were not as expected, and the events that followed were something short of a sick comedy. The younger Okumura tried to not look too dismayed when one of the guards had that moment of realization his arm was in a sling. Then the other guard yelled at the other to cuff him above the elbows instead. The first guard shot back that he would still need to take Yukio's arm from the sling to do so. That was when the head lady demanded they stop and not bother with that step. The end result left him with his good arm being held securely by one of the bodyguards.

The two guards led him a couple floors down to a small room with gray cinder-block walls and no windows. A florescent light flashed on, revealing a small table and a couple chairs off to one side. The plainness of it left Yukio wondering if it was an interrogation room, or at one point, a holding cell.

He was told to sit at the chair by the table, and then much to his chagrin, his good hand was handcuffed to the table. Those two apparently had trust issues with him. Yukio sighed as he watched the door click closed. It probably was locked from the inside also.

The control he held over his nerves slipped even more when he thought about his current situation. He felt trapped and defenseless, a position he wished to not have in the last place he wanted to be. He braced against that fearful feeling trying to take over. As long as he kept his senses, he could get out of this. He never was as weak as he appeared.

Because the idea of surrendering completely to the Illuminati still made him feel sick. He only came to find the answers that he wasn't able to get anywhere else. Yes, he believed that the Order would restrain him, if they knew, if not be threatened with the same warnings as his brother from the Vatican. He could just as easily guess that the Illuminati would grossly exploit his power, once it was realized. The only comfort that Yukio had was if he did lose control of his actions, his body, at least they could have the means to keep him in check. That was a big 'if', however. 'Keeping in check' may mean instant death.

Even now, he had that feeling that Satan didn't have a side. The King of Demons would do whatever he wanted to reach his goals, regardless of who it was for. Yukio could never give in to a reason like that, to let Satan unleash his power and flames.

Would he also become a demon like Rin … or would he become possessed by His might? The report of what happened to Izumi haunted him… she admitted to the Knights she believed it was possible to gain control of the nine-tails, but the power of the fox spirit was too strong for her. Satan was the king of demons… Yukio had no chance! He would have to find a way to resist before it came to that.

He looked at the table he was cuffed to again, thinking that if he crouched under it and lifted it up with the table on his back, he could slide the cuff off the leg. The way it was now was stupid.

The door had opened at that moment, and Yukio's eyes darted upwards. Upon acknowledging who it was, the young Okumura twin sat more upright in his chair. In fact, if he wasn't cuffed to the table leg, he would have been standing up in shock.

"So we meet again. How exciting!" Saburouta Toudou practically glowed, his youthful grin spreading from ear to feathery ear. "Shall we let bygones be bygones then?"

AN:

Thank you for reading! This certainly is shaping up to be a lot more involved that I first thought.

It probably did not help that I had been more influenced by the translation of Weekend Hero of Kato's light novel, and the Exorcist Salaryman spinoffs that I came across too. (Watches her serious plot line fly out the window) *facepalm*

We'll find out more about Shiemi in the next chapter though.

I also saw this movie called the Dark Tower. And they had a protagonist who fought off the evil with guns too. Liked the creed so much, I thought it could apply here also.

The Dark Tower – full gunslinger creed:I do not aim with my hand. He who aims with his hand has forgotten the face of his father. I aim with my eye. I do not shoot with my hand. He who shoots with his hand has forgotten the face of his father. I shoot with my mind. I do not kill with my gun. He who kills with his gun has forgotten the face of his father. I kill with my heart.