Time didn't matter - it might have been minutes or hours as I sat there in deep thought and despair, before I was distracted by someone else in the corridor.

I didn't move, but was horrified when I heard Zach!

"Well I hate to lock you up in here, Zach, but it's for your own protection. People in town are just spooked, but I'm sorry this has had to happen..." Wayne was saying, apparently oblivious that he was God...

God or Andrew must have made him forget about that part...

"Do what you have to sheriff." Zach was saying with reassurance.

Oh his voice...it sounded different to me now...it was truly a beautiful and powerful voice, so full of commitment and love, and wisdom.

I closed my eyes tight and covered my ears, shaking.

Even his human voice, I could not handle with the level of guilt I was feeling.

Feeling sick in my stomach, I shakily leaned back against the wall on the bed, knees tucked up again.

To offer myself just a tiny bit of comfort, I wrapped my arms round my knees and tucked my head in, closing my eyes and hardly daring to make a noise.

My heart was hammering and I shook violently, deathly afraid of being so close to God again.

When I heard Wayne leave, it made it all the worse.

Right then, I wanted to beg God for forgiveness - literally, beg...but damn it, I couldn't bring myself to do it.

I didn't deserve it, and God deserved better than me as a servent, let alone a child.

Really, I was hiding...which was pointless of course, he knew fine well I was there.

The silence was so loud...so deafening, and I tried to block my ears from it, but it just didn't work.

Slowly breathing out to try and stop the panic attack that was building up, I concentrated, desperate to control my thoughts.

First thing I could think clearly of was bible quotes, so I just went with it...

"You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all those who call to you."

Psalm 86:5

"The Lord is good to all, he has compassion for all he has made."

Psalm 145:9

"But because oh his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy."

Ephesians 2:4

"For thou, Lord, art good, and ready to forgive; and plenteous in mercy unto all them that call upon thee."

Psalms 86:5

My breathing relaxed into a normal rhythm, and it became clear that I had been moved and comforted by the words I remembered.

As I sat, my body even finally started relaxing for the first time in 2 days.

Mulling it over in my head, I realised how much God truly, truly cared for me, and how much the devil had manipulated me and used me.

One of my problems is that I had forgotten who God really was.

He had suited me when I had the good feelings of awe and wonder, and of comfort and peace, but had rejected him harshly the second something bad happened.

But he was GOD! Lord over all creation, but he hadn't shown off to me or tried to big himself up, he had seemed almost human and had offered his hand out to me in comfort, and I denied him my love...

My apologies was the very, very least he deserved from me!

Gulping, I took a deep breath and did it...

At this point I was still far too afraid to literally see him, so I slowly got off the bed, remaining hidden by the wall of the cell that was connected to the bars bit.

Shaking from shame and fear, I used to bed to support me as I slid to my knees, facing where I knew Zach was.

This was highly emotional and I simply let the tears fall, deeply regretting my actions.

In the first moment, I simply wanted to show God that I was submitting to him in a spiritual way...so I did just that. Once I was on my knees, I bowed my body quite forward and bowed my head, holding on to the bed as a emotional support.

My eyes were shut tight.

I was terrified, but I needed to do this...

Shivering, I at last spoke...or at least croaked out the words.

"I...I...am so..."

My own breathing forced me to pause, as it became fast, again panicked.

The tears didn't help, but I could no nothing to stop them.

"I'm so sorry!" I whimpered pathetically.

"I'm so sorry..."

I sniffed, rubbing my eyes on my arm and doing my best to control myself.

"Everything I said and did...was just - horrible. Unbelievably selfish...and now I'm seperate from you. I...I er...told you I wanted nothing to do with you - it w-was a lie."

I breathed out, willing myself to continue.

"I need you. I know - I know I don't deserve you, at all...I deserve to be cast aside. B-b-but, please...please, even if you do decide to cast me away, just please...f..f...forgive me...I'm so sorry! I''m so sorry!"

I couldn't do it anymore and let go into heaving sobs, distraught with how bad I had hurt God.

As I bitterly wept, I suddenly felt strong arms around me, pulling me close.

Not wanting to fight in the slightest, I relaxed into them and completely poured my soul out.

"I am here." he whispered, gently but firmly.

My body heaved with bitter sobs, but he didn't flinch or go to move.

I wrapped my arms round him like a child, desperate for comfort.

He gave me all he could, refusing to let me go.

"I'm so sorry! Please forgive me!" I begged, totally broken.

"Ssssshhhh, it's all ok now - I forgive you, I am here. You are my child, and I love you more than you could imagine." he assured me, genty stroking my back.

I whimpered, shaking my head.

"After everything I said and done?"

"Yes, child. I love you, and everything you did, you did because you were hurting so bad. Oh what you have suffered - no human should have to face it - most could not bare it! But let it go, child, give me your pain." he commanded tenderly.

"But I love you...I don't want you to hurt because of me." I choked out pathetically.

He hugged me even tighter then.

"I can handle it." he whispered firmly.

Sniffing, I slowly shook my head and closed my eyes really tight.

"I can't..." I whimpered..."handle it. Please...help me - you're strong and I am weak. I need you."

The room was suddenly flooded with light and brilliant white light, and opening my eyes, I saw God for what He truly was, in all of His glory.

I trembled with amazement and fear, and remained silent, simply soaking in what I was seeing.

"I will bare it for you, child. We still have work to do. Will you still serve me?" He asked.

I teared up again and my heart was hammering.

Gulping, I whispered what was in my soul.

"I'm scared of letting you down again. What if I mess up? What if I hurt someone else, or hurt you again?" I pleaded.

God sighed, but with sadness, not anger.

He crouched in front of me again.

"You won't. This time, you will trust me and hand over your angers and fears to me. I will heal you, and you will serve me." He assured, holding my shoulder.

My lip quivered and I shivered.

"What you have given me is beyond measure. You let me meet you in that cave, you comforted me through my mother's death, you gave me the gift of never being afraid of death, you let me know you were God when you wouldn't even tell an Angel, you gave me friendship and above all...you gave me forgiveness, redemption and mercy. I will serve you, until my last breath. Then...if...if you will allow it...I will kneel by your feet for eternety to sing your praise for being a mighty God, powerful in the best sense of all...powerful in love."

I breathed out, overwhelmed, and in a feeble yet touching effort to show Him how much I meant it, bowed down even futher so my face was on the ground, inches from his feet...

I breathed out, unable to do or say anything else.

I had done everything I could...

Slowly, the light and warmth disappeared as God returned to his human form.

I didn't move, simply wanting to wait for guidance.

"You have no idea how much love for you flows through my being." He stated compassionately, gently pulling me up to my previous kneeling position.

"I love you too." I whispered back in earnest.

He breathed out...clearly this was a much better exchange than when I said I wanted nothing to do with him.

I frowned.

"I didn't mean it when I said you could shove it..." I started quietly, "I was just hurting. Physically as well as mentally. It wasn't just the devil who hurt me, I hurt myself too, and it made it way worse. I'm sorry."

He rubbed my arm.

"I know you are, and I forgive you. And I DO know how much pain you have went through. I am so sorry you had to go through all that, and even worse that you felt you were alone through it. I am here, and I always will be."

He opened his arms and breathing out, I relaxed into his embrace, overcome with immense comfort.

He healed me from my physical wounds.

"As time goes on, you will heal from your mental wounds. You will always remember these last 48 hours...but you will also remember the love and redemption you have been given, to counter the hatred and seperation you encountered. The memories of your ordeal are not there to punish you. But they will serve as a reminder of why you should not disobey me. Do you understand?" he asked me gently.

"Yes sir." I nodded meekly.

He rubbed my arm again.

"Good - come." he invited, standing up.

He helped me to stand and I realised I was exhausted.

"You must sleep. You have been through too much and your body and mind needs rest. We need to continue our work tomorrow to help the town."

Without argument, I finally curled into bed.

Lovingly, he pulled the blanket over me and kissed my cheek.

"Goodnight." I whispered.

"Goodnight, child." He replied, but I was already in a deep, deep slumber.