Kakuzu hasn't always been Kakuzu.

It's a bit hard to comprehend, and even he finds himself sometimes wondering if he's really Kakuzu, or he's not Kakuzu, or if he's really just trapped in some nasty genjutsu shit that makes him question his very own identity.

But he is Kakuzu, he knows that first and foremost. Kakuzu of Taki. Or, well, formerly of Taki, considering his slashed hitai-ate.

Sometimes, he'll frown at his own hitai-ate, the pain and somehow disappointment resurfacing whenever he remembered the day when he slaughtered the people within his own village. The disappointment goes both ways: to the people who turned their backs on him because he failed to kill the God of Shinobi and to himself, who found it easy to kill them in his bout of anger, disappointment and fury.

But, well, when he thinks over it again, it hadn't been easy. It weighed on him when he did it, when he had to do it for his own survival.

It was a do or die situation, and the shinobi inside him told him that he couldn't just run.

(He ran from Senju Hashirama, and look where that had gotten him into).

And so he took the village elders' hearts, a bunch of forbidden techniques in his arsenal (it would be useful, his mind told him that day), and went out of Takigakure, the place he'd treated as home until that moment, the place and the people he was willing to sacrifice his limbs and life for.

He took action in accordance to his fury and walked out with his dying will.

A sardonic smile lifts upon his lips. Dying will, alright.

He doesn't know what made it happen, nor the circumstances that triggered it. But when he was on his way out of the village, when he slaughtered elders upon elders and took their hearts, it was as if something was insistently whispering in his mind; telling him of when and where the elders would strike back during their battle, a strong intuition that he'd come to trust fervently.

It was as if fire had burst from his chest, his eyes, his whole body, engulfing him in calm tranquility in the midst of his fury.

It was flickering, but it was there, however it went ignored when he was on his way out of the village.

Only later on when he was settled far, far away from that wretched, traitorous, sickening place he once called as home-

Everything-

Spilled out.

He remembered of days with his family, and his Family, his friends and comrades and underlings. Remembered of days filled with laughter and warmth, remembered of days when he was afraid and scared for his friends that he dragged into this mess, for his future, for his safety and the people beside him. Remembered of days when he fought and fought and fought. Remembered of days when he won, when he lost, when he won and lost and won again. Remembered of days when he ruled, when he took leadership alongside his comrades.

He remembered of days passed and when he finally lied down and took his last breath.

Remembered of a life when he lived as Sawada Tsunayoshi, Vongola Decimo.

And even to this day onward, he will always remember it, will always finds himself reminiscing the distant, fond memory.

Perhaps when he remembered, he should have taken a complete U turn, should've turned into Sawada Tsunayoshi, instead of the angry and betrayed Kakuzu of Taki, who not even five hours ago had murdered his village's elders.

But in this life he's Kakuzu first and foremost, and Sawada Tsunayoshi second.

Their personalities mashed with each other, beliefs and cultures and values, all mixing into one. Some clashed, some mixed in together perfectly. In the cases when they clashed, one should win.

Kakuzu of Taki, and Sawada Tsunayoshi of the Vongola.

Both are different people,

but both are one and the same.

From that point on, he became Kakuzu who is not entirely Kakuzu, but still Kakuzu nevertheless.

From that point on, he became Sawada Tsunayoshi, who lived as Kakuzu, and will always continue living as Kakuzu.

He's Kakuzu now. And he will never change it for the world.

Money makes the world go round.

Kakuzu believes that in this world filled with treachery and back stabbing, money is one thing that he can always depend on.

He sometimes cannot believe he starts to think like Mammon, but nevertheless that is the one thing Kakuzu believes in. And his intuition agrees. After all, with money, he can pay someone that his intuition doesn't trust, into following his whims.

With enough money, he can live comfortably, wandering through this world and visiting many places in a comfortable pace, without having to worry much about what to eat, where to sleep.

Well, he's a shinobi anyway, so without money he can still live by. But with money, everything is easier.

He truly believes that Mammon must have influenced him somehow. It cannot be any other way. He did spend quite a lot of time with the Varia back then, despite Xanxus's characteristic wrath at almost everything from Sawada to Tsunayoshi. As angry and pissed off Xanxus was, he was a comrade he could always trust to protect Vongola.

And he did miss the guy. He missed everyone.

Nevertheless, they are mere memories for him now. Important memories, yes, but still just memories. He's Kakuzu now and he has to live on.

Perhaps some time in the future, he'll be able to gain another family.

His intuition seems to agree with him, and Kakuzu smiles behind his mask.

Soon, soon.

Akatsuki.

Kakuzu glances at the person (or is it?) who introduced himself as Pein, and to the strange creature called Zetsu. There's warning bells ringing inside his head, cautioning him that this... Pein, is dangerous.

And those eyes.

Ripples, ripples upon ripples.

A doujutsu? Truly, he hadn't focused much on doujutsu other than the Sharingan, more because he has no desire to obtain such eyes and that he hasn't encountered any ninja with particular doujutsus despite his many, many years as a nuke-nin. Perhaps it's because he hasn't found it necessary to travel to the Fire Country just yet, alongside him steering as far away as he can from Kiri thanks to its battles he has no interest in joining.

His knowledge in this particular purple doujutsu itself is almost close to none. But he knows enough that this person must be, in a way, dangerous.

Trust your intuition, Tsuna, Reborn seems to chide him inside his mind. Don't jump into conclusions, don't jump into the fight. Look, pay attention, and then fight back.

Kakuzu smiles lightly behind his mask.

I know, Reborn.

"Leader-sama wants you to join the organization," the creature resembling that of an Aloe Vera (and it's that just strange) says to him, and Kakuzu finds that it isn't a lie, not really. Something seems to tell him that there's something else though, something... more, in this Aloe Vera guy, but he cannot seem to find any that supports his intuition.

But a warning is a warning, and he trusts his intuition. Therefore, he shelves that particular thought for later and focuses on Leader-sama instead.

"And what is the purpose of this... organization?" He asks. "And why do you need me?"

"We are collecting S-rank nuke-nin to join our cause," Pein says ominously. "Your abilities and prowess have interested me, and therefore we are giving you a position within it."

So, an organization filled with traitors. His mind concludes. It doesn't sound like a place that Kakuzu wants to spend his time in. Especially when he doesn't know what this organization even wants.

And thus he asks just that.

"For peace," Pein answers swiftly, and Kakuzu is surprised when he finds true belief and conviction within the man. "Akatsuki aims for world peace, and it will create true peace with any means necessary."

"Peace," Kakuzu deadpans, "and how, I pray tell, will you be able to achieve such a thing?"

Despite believing in the notion in peace itself, Kakuzu cannot help but to be skeptical. No matter what, conflict will always happen, no matter how small. That's just how the world is. Effort can be done to minimize it, yes, things can be done to resolve it. But a true, whole peace, in a world filled with many differences, as well as a world filled with shinobi that seem to depend on conflicts to continue on living, an abstract notion of "true peace" seems to be... very lacking.

And to see group filled with terrorists aiming for world peace, even an insane man would question it.

"A person can truly desire for peace when they've experienced pain and anguish," Pein answers, and Kakuzu's brain almost short circuited when he realizes the implication within the name Pein. "If that must be done to have the people within this world to desire for peace, then so be it."

"So you're going to do genocide," he almost sneers, green eyes focusing on the minuscule twitch on Pein's eyebrow. "Or am I mistaken?"

"Perhaps," Pein answers, "The Akatsuki has established another way beside total annihilation of the people, Kakuzu of Taki, although you shouldn't be against it, given your reputation." The jab is as clear as day, but it goes ignored. After a small pause, Pein continues. "We are to collect the bijuu, and to do that, we need strong shinobi. I ask you again, Kakuzu of Taki, would you join the Akatsuki?"

Kakuzu almost balks. The bijuu? They want to collect the bijuu? What can the bijuu do to gain world peace save for being used to destroy villages?

He can believe that Pein is insane, for believing in this abstract notion of peace through receiving pain (how masochistic, Bianchi seems to comment inside his mind, sounding coy) and he's willing to do so either. Only, only, they're staring at him, expectant, and his intuition tells him that whatever he may think, there is no getting out of this.

"And what would you do," he tests, "if I refuse?"

Silence.

"I will fight you," Pein says, "if you win, I will let you go. If I win, you have to join us."

Yeaaaah. There is no getting out of this.

Kakuzu sighs. "On one condition," he tells them, "I shall be given the freedom to do whatever I want inbetween organization duties."

Pein seems to raise his eyebrow, "If you try to betray the Akatsuki, I will know."

The threat is as clear as day. Kakuzu simply stares at him in return.

"However," the orange haired man seems to amend, "bounty hunting is always welcomed."

Well, that explains that he knows exactly what Kakuzu likes to do.

"And vacation time," Kakuzu says, easily, like a child demanding candy from a mother.

Pein blinks. "Very well."

Beside him, Zetsu seems to tilt his head. "So you'll join?" The Aloe Vera's voice seems to echo even in a wide space such as this, and Kakuzu has to resist a shiver. There is definitely something wrong with this creature.

"Fighting two unknown people, one with a doujutsu, is a hassle," he simply replies, staring at them evenly. "And I trust my instincts."

"Oh, man, and I wanna see a fight, too."

"Too bad."

And thus, begins his days in the Akatsuki.

Next chapter: Bad Habit (or is it?)