A/N

Welcome weary traveler! I hope you find rest here while reading my latest mind escape. I'm eager to bring this newest adventure to life for you. This starts half way through New Moon at the movie theatre and then from then on out, the storyline doesn't follow the plot of New Moon, although certain events may still occur. Because of all this, Bella is not the same. I think that'll be pretty obvious as you start reading. I'm hoping that it'll be refreshing from the more common Jacob/Bella fics that are out there.

Without You

Disclaimer: All characters(unless original) are owned by Stephenie Meyer. Portions of dialogue and narrative within the first chapter also belong to Meyer.

"What a marshmallow! You should hold out for someone with a stronger stomach. Someone who laughs at the gore that makes weaker men vomit."

"I'll keep my eyes open for someone like that."

Jacob and Bella were alone in the hallway. Both theatres were halfway through the movie and it was deserted - quiet enough for them to hear the popcorn popping at the concession counter in the lobby.

Jacob sat down on the velveteen-upholstered bench against the wall and patted the space beside him.

"He sounded like he was going to be in there for a while," he said, stretching his long legs out in front of him as he settled in to wait.

Bella joined him with a sigh. Jacob looked like he was thinking about blurring more lines. Sure enough, as soon as Bella sat down, he shifted over to put his arm around her shoulder.

"Jake," she protested, leaning away. He dropped his arm, not looking bothered at all by the minor rejection. Jake reached out and took her hand firmly, wrapping his other hand around her wrist when she tried to pull away again. Bella was surprised to see the sudden confidence within him.

"Now, hold on just a minute, Bella," he said in a calm voice. "Tell me something."

Bella grimaced, not wanting to do this. Not just now, but not ever. To her, there seemed to be nothing left in her life that was more important than Jacob Black. To put her heart back on the line between friendship and something more wasn't something that Bella ever intended to do again. To be hurt once, was shame on them; second time, shame on her.

"What?" Bella muttered sourly.

"You like me, right?"

Bella considered briefly how she should answer.

"You know I do."

"Better than that joker puking his gutts out in there?" Jacob gestured to the bathroom door.

"Yes," she sighed, feeling her heart rate pick up, instinctively knowing where he was leading this conversation.

"Better than the girls too," she added, with a chuckle in an attempt to steer him elsewhere. Jacob wasn't going to let this drop.

"But, is that all?"

Bella paused, not knowing how she should answer. She could lie, hurt his feelings but she could also express what she had been keeping to herself for weeks now - The truth. She was falling in love with him. And that scared the crap out of her.

Her heart beat pounded in her ears. She found herself having to constantly remind herself that she had fallen in love with Edward, and he had hurt her. As much as she wanted to keep her distance from Jacob to prevent her heart from going through that trauma again, she needed him; no, she wanted him in every possible way. It was a frustrating contradiction that Bella's heart and mind feuded over. Unfortunately, her mind won out every time Jacob made an innocent advance towards her.

Her mind went back to sitting in the movie theatre; Mike on one side and Jacob on the other, both with their hands open to her. While she didn't pay Mike's hand any attention, Jacob's seemed to taunt her, tease her about possibilities of opening her heart fully to him could mean.

She knew that Jacob cared a lot for her; she could see it in his eyes. She'd seen it for a while now. She'd also seen it in Edward's eyes. And if someone who claimed to love her so much could hurt her, Bella wasn't about to put herself in that position once again.

Slowly, Jacob moved in closer. She could feel his breath on her face. He met her eyes, looking for non-verbal permission to move even closer to her.

Bella couldn't help but look to his mouth, his lips seeming to wait for her. She had never given pause to look at them and for the first time, she had to admit that she woudn't mind finding out how they'd feel against her own.

Would they be as soft as they look? Would he taste as sweet as he smelled? How warm would they be?

Bella felt Jacob's nose brush up against her own, and she could almost taste him. As though her mind suddenly reconnected to her body, she turned her head. Jacob rested his forehead against the side of her head and sighed aloud.

"Jake, please don't do this."

"I know you want to," he whispered in her ear.

"But I can't."

"Why?"

"Cause I'm..."

Bella trailed off, not wanting to admit her fears aloud. Jacob leaned back to look at her face.

"You're, what?"

When Mike suddenly appeared coming out of the men's room, his face pale and sweaty, Bella quickly stood up and came to his side, the prior seconds with Jacob now just a fleeting memory. Jacob sat in shock at the sudden change in mood and he clenched his fist, watching Bella assist Mike to walk towards him.

"If you didn't feel well, why didn't you say something?" Bella asked, her arm around his waist.

"I was hoping it would pass," Mike said, swallowing for a second before he nodded that he was okay.

Bella looked briefly to Jacob as he stood up from the bench with a sigh.

"Let's go home then," Bella suggested.

"Movie too much for you?" Jacob asked Mike bitterly.

"I actually didn't see much of it," Mike snapped with a biting glare. "I wasn't feeling well before the movie."

"Regardless," Bella said, turning to Jacob to glare at him for his heartless comment towards Mike, "we should get him home."

While Bella turned to get Mike out of the cinema, Jacob paused.

Knowing the long ride ahead of them back to Forks, Jacob quickly went up to the girl working the concession stand, and asked for an empty popcorn bucket. Taking one look at Mike, she shoved not just one, but two at Jacob and insisted that they get Mike out of there.

While Bella helped get Mike into the backseat of the Rabbit, Jacob thrust the popcorn bucket at the him, begging Mike to use it. Rolling down the windows for some fresh air, Jacob turned on the car and headed towards Forks.

Every so often he'd glance back at Mike and wince whenever he heard him puke into the bucket. Jacob just praying that he didn't mess up his car. Jacob looked over at Bella, seeing her with her arms wrapped around her legs, keeping herself warm while the cool, fresh air blew into the car. She pulled up the sides of her coat around her neck and glanced over at him when she caught him staring. Jacob quickly looked back out the windshield.

She hadn't said a word to Jacob for the entire ride back to Forks. Even when they quickly dropped Mike off at his house with the assurance that they'll bring his Suburban over from her place she didn't even pay Jacob any attention.

As Jacob watched Bella walk over to his car after giving the keys to the Suburban to Mrs. Newton at their door, he made a decision then and there. He was going to get her talk about what was going on between them, whether she wanted to or not. Jacob knew her well; she'd try to avoid him or try to make an escape, so he took her to the one place where she'd have no where to go. It didn't take Bella long to realize that he wasn't heading towards her house, but they were going towards La Push.

"Where are we going?"

It was the first thing she had said to him and was said in such an accusatory tone, that Jacob couldn't help but clench his fingers around the steering wheel and bite his tongue to prevent a smart remark to come back at her.

"Jacob, take me home," she demanded.

"No," he said, scowling. "Not until you talk to me."

"We ARE talking!"

Her outburst caught Jacob momentarily by surprise. He had never heard her yell at him before, or anyone for that matter. For so long, he had been used to her melancholy and even placid personality that to hear her raise her voice was unusual. Still, he couldn't help but match her frustration with anger.

"No, we are shouting!"

Jacob made a quick turn, the car tires squealing as they slid on the asphalt.

"Jacob! You're going to get us both killed!"

Jacob snorted bitterly at her lack of faith in his driving skills.

The Rabbit continued down a dirt road before he finally brought the car to a stop in a small clearing. Satisfied with himself, Jacob turned off the ignition and sighed, silence and darkness flooding the inside of the car.

Jacob let out a deep breath before turning on a single light above the rear-view mirro. He could almost hear Bella silently fuming beside him.

"We need to talk," Jacob said, his tone softer than it had been while they were driving along.

Bella shrugged, looking straight ahead out the windshield. "There's nothing to talk about. Take me home."

"Not until we talk about what almost happened back in Port Angeles," Jacob said, turning in his seat. "Admit it - You were going to kiss me."

Bella shook her head and chuckled incredulously. "No, I wasn't."

"Yes, you were. Why are you denying it?!"

With a frustrated sigh, Bella took off her seatbelt and opened the door to the Rabbit, slamming it behind her before she made her way down the worn foot path.

Leave it to Jacob to know exactly how to force her into a corner. But she was determined to either fight back or crawl her way out of it. She was no longer the meek, quiet and broken girl that was found crying in the woods a few months ago. Jacob's friendship had healed that wound in her chest and reminded her that she was a strong and confident woman with people who cared about her. At the same time, Jacob had weaved his way into her heart; a place that Bella had thought she had locked up tight following her breakup with Edward. But he ultimately broke in and changed her. As much as she had fallen in love with him, there was no way that she would have this discussion with Jacob. He knew her well and would see the truth about how she felt so clearly on her face when she was would insist that she wanted them to remain as friends. Bella chastised herself, knowing that she shouldn't have accidentally led him on so many times, especially with that almost-kiss. Yet in the same conflicted thought, Bella knew that she would never be satisfied as being only friends with Jacob.

In the darkness, she could barely tell where she was going, but she make out the path in front of her. Past the tree line, the sound of the surf crashing against the rocks along the coastline roared up at her. Bella knew she wasn't far from the beach. Behind her, she suddenly heard Jacob calling her name and a flashlight cutting within the darkness. She walked a little further and felt the cold wind blowing up from the ocean against her face as she realized she was standing on the top of the cliffs overlooking the ocean.

Realizing that she was suddenly standing between two precipices - the cliff and Jacob - she paused, not certain which way was the safer option.

"Bella, will you just stop for a minute?" He said, shining the light at her. "I want to talk to you."

Bella sighed and nodded.

"Then, talk."

Jacob let out a frustrated breath and looked at the ground between them.

"I'm just going to put this out there cause it looks like there's no other way to do it," he mumbled anxiously before he looked at her. "I like you...no, it's more than just that. I'm pretty sure that I've fallen in love with you, Bella." He paused and walked up to her, stopping short to give Bella space but close enough to be able to hear her over the loud surf below. "And I know that deep down, you feel something for me."

Bella let out a breath, silently debating whether she should confirm his suspicions or hurt him with a lie. Although that lie would protect her heart from possibly being broken again, she just couldn't do that to Jacob.

"Maybe I do feel something for you. But it doesn't matter. We can't be more than friends."

Jacob took two big steps towards her, taking her hands and instantly warming them within his own. He was happy to have just hear her admit what she had been feeling.

"Why? Why can't we be together? Is it because I'm Quileute? Is that it? I know some of the old folks around here frown on mixed relationships, but I don't give a damn about what people would think of us being together."

Bella shook her head and closed her eyes. Inwardly, she was shocked that he even brought his heritage up as a reason behind them unable being together, as it was something that never occured to her.

"No, no! It has nothing to do with that."

"Then what is it?"

Bella took a deep breath and looked out at the ocean waves below.

"I'm scared."

"Scared?"

Bella let out an exasperated breath, frustrated that Jacob wasn't getting what she was admitting to him.

"Jake, I'm scared that I've fallen in love with you," she told him.

It took a few seconds for it to sink into Jacob's head.

"That's why you've been pushing me away?" he concluded softly, watching her face before confusion etched his own. "You're afraid of me?"

Bella quickly shook his head. "No, of course not."

"Then what is it? Help me understand."

Bella swallowed.

"When...he...Edward left," she began, no longer feeling that pain associated with saying his name that had been a constant companion of hers for months, "it felt like a hole had been punched in my chest. I couldn't breath, or think of anything except for the loss that I felt. Then you, somehow you put me back together and at first I craved your companionship because it seemed to keep the pain away. I admit that I was selfishly using you. But as time went on, I realized that pain was no longer there and I was just wanting to be with you because deep down, I felt something for you. And I don't want to go through that pain again of losing someone. I don't want to lose your friendship and to know that I've fallen in love with you scares the shit out of me."

Jacob smiled, reaching forward to put his hand on Bella's cheek.

"You wont ever lose me," he assured her. "I would never hurt you like that, Bella. I promise you." He paused for a second. "I love you."

With a deep breath, a smile came to Bella's face. She believed him when he said that he loved her. She could see it on his face. The wind blew up from the surf and came up the cliff, before blowing against Bella's skin. She wasn't certain if it was the cold or Jacob's hand on her cheek that caused goosebumps to rise on her flesh.

"I love you, Jake," she said softly, the words falling easily from her lips.

Jacob smirked as he slowly moved closer to her, looking between her eyes and her lips. He slid his hand behind her neck before leaning in. Just as he was about to kiss her, Jacob paused, hearing her light gasps of anticipation of that first touch.

"Don't be afraid," Jacob whispered at the last possible second, his lips nearly brushing her own as he spoke.

...to be continued...please review