WOOKIE KAREOKE

Authoress' note: Thanks goes to Reality Rejection Service, Guest, Same guest from chapter 1, and Datperson for reviewing. Virtual Root Beer all around.

Orio, Luke, and Leia: Yay!

Authoress: Sadly, school is sneaking up behind me like a panther, so I won't be able to write as often (if at all). So here's one last hurrah before the school year begins!

Orio: I'm lucky, I don't have to go to school.

Authoress: (glares) Anywho, my price for finding my wand has gone up. Anyone who finds my wand gets 10 bucks, a pair of reading glasses, and a sock.

Vader: A sock?

Authoress: A sock.

Orio: Joanfenny Kenobi owns nothing but me, a car, a comic book, a sock, a pair of reading glasses, and 10 bucks.

Authoress: Actually, the reading glasses belong to my mom.

Luke: Okay…

19) I will not let droids go to a beauty parlor.

Ezra Bridger approached Hera Syndulla, who was currently admiring a set of gardening gloves. "Hey Hera, where's Chopper?"

"Hiding from you, most likely." Hera responded. "He told me about what you did earlier."

Ezra shrugged. "He stole my credit card."

Suddenly Chopper, as well as R2-D2, C-3PO, and BB8 came strutting (or rolling) down the aisle. They were all covered in trashy make-up. Chopper even had fake eyelashes glued to his camera-eye.

While Ezra laughed his head off, Hera scolded. "Chopper, what happened to you?"

"We found a beauty parlor that gave free makeovers for droids." C-3PO piped up. "Don't we look fabulous?"

As soon as Goldie said "fabulous" Ezra laughed so hard he collapsed. Hera, on the other hand, was not amused. "You guys can't be in the rebellion looking like that! Chopper, wash that stuff off."

Suddenly Ezra gave a manly yelp and fled out of the store, turning around, she spotted a baffled Darth Maul. "Here to stalk Ezra?" She asked.

"Um… actually I'm here because garden gloves are on sale."

Then Maul saw the droids and he too bursted out into mirthful laughter.

20) I will not let Wookies sing Karaoke.

There were no Imperials at McAllister's.

Do you know why?

The Rebels are finally having their Karaoke party!

Rebels that ranged from Rey to Cassian to Leia were all partying up a storm. Luke was floating above the crowd, a Root Beer in his hands. About half of the Rebels were drunk, and the other half had just gone nuts.

When Wedge and Dash had finished their duet, Chewbacca climbed onto the stage, snatching the mike from a drunk Wedge. Then he pushed the two rebels into the crowd, where they began floating above it with Luke. Soon the song "Shake it off" started playing, and Chewie began roaring his heart out. Unfortunately, most of the Rebels had no idea what he was saying. To make it even worse, he also started dancing.

Two minutes later the restaurant's manager run onto the stage and started beating the Wookie with a broom (strange choice of weaponry). "Get this Big Foot out of my restaurant!"

I won't tell you what happened to the poor guy, but let's just say that his head got stuck in a toilet.

That's what you get for messin' with a Wookie, pal!

21) I will not attack villains with house pets.

"Oh, come on! We can use it to eliminate the Rebels." The Grand Inquisitor whined to Lord Vader. While the Rebels were going crazy with their Karaoke party, the Imperials were gathered at Kowls. The Seventh Sister had chocolate on her face, Palpatine was still drunk, and in Vader's hands was the great and powerful Authoress Wand.

"I say we turn them all into chocolate." The Seventh Sister slurred.

"NO! We can make them do the chicken dance forever!" Caedus shouted.

"Why the chicken dance?" Asked Kylo.

"So I can film Jaina and Anakin, and then post it on YouTube."

"I think one video of a Skywalker doing a ridiculous dance is enough for one day." Vader objected, remembering his son's little Gershwin jig.

"Yeah, that video's already got, like, seven million views!" Palpatine hiccupped. Then he passed out.

"Whatever we do with it, we can't let Joanfenny know we have it." Vader stated.

"Attack, my Guinee pig army!" a young voice shouted. Suddenly a wave of furry rodents overpowered the villains. The only one who escaped was Kylo (of all people) and he escaped with the wand.

Uh-oh…

Meanwhile, on the other side of the store, Sabine Wren crackled madly.

Geez, what's with her and house pets?

Meanwhile, at Joanfenny's house…

Joan was having a very difficult time getting Orio to talk. After the whole banana incident, Orio found his stash of Catnip (that Joan had hidden away) and now he was rambling on about crocodiles or something.

"Orio, be strait with me, how did you get that banana?" Joan growled.

"Crocodiles aren't strait, they're fluffy…" Was the reply.

"If I had my wand right now, I would make Orio sober." Joan mumbled to herself. "I just hope Kylo Ren doesn't have it or something."

Meanwhile, back at the mall…

+Bonus

With great power comes great responsibility. Unfortunately Kylo Ren wasn't a Marvel character, so he had never heard of that quote.

Now that Kylo had the wand, he could do whatever he wanted with it. He could eliminate the Rebels, he could buy a cat, he could even…

Kylo's thought journeyed back to Rey. How easy it would be to just wave the wand around and BOOM, Reylo will be a thing. The Dark Knight smiled maliciously.

Rey: Hey guys, while is Kylo giving me a funny look?

Luke: I donno. Maybe he's thinking of singing cheeseballs.

Leia: that's how his face normally looks.

Rey: A little crazed?

Leia: Yup.

Orio: Flowers are astronauts…

Rey: Seriously, Kylo's freaking me out.

Finn: Don't worry, Rey, I'll protect you! (Runs off to challenge Kylo.)

Luke: Should someone stop him?

Joanfenny, with popcorn: Nah, this outa get interesting.

Authoress' note: Anywho, this will probably be my last chapter for a while. I know, I hate it when fanfic writers stop their stories, so I understand your pain. I promise that I will get back to it ASAP. I originally wrote this story as a way to pass the time while I work on A Writer's Mind, but I've just been having too much fun with this. Thank you so much for reviewing, favoriting, and following.

Luke, waving his hand: And you will continue to favorite, follow, review, and subscribe to this story.

Everyone else: THAT'S YOUTUBE!