AN: This is my version for the ShAmy proposal in the ending of the tenth season. Thanks for ever for being my beta Tammy (Bigbangenthusiast) I decided to divide this story in two chapters because I thought that way it'd work better. BTW I don't really like headlines or introductory pieces, I just do it because it is a mandatory requirement, so I know it's kind of awful.

Sheldon was on his knees, waiting for her answer as patiently as she had been for him during all these years in their relationship. Despite his inconsiderate and sometimes rude behavior towards her, she was always standing by him. Thanks to that he was now more mature emotionally, and even in more aspects he was not willing to list right now. He was trying to keep calm and avoid all the negative aspects of his decision. He softly breathed in and stared at her face smiling slightly, drowning in her emerald eyes. He could hear her hyperventilate. His thoughts were interrupted by her trembling voice.

"Sheldon, this is a huge surprise. I didn't expect you to come here; it's late! Why now?" She asked a little confused, trying to process everything. She couldn't believe it. It was so sudden and fast that it started to concern her, but without being able to look away from his face, he was looking so lovely, and the ring was so beautiful, she really wanted it on her finger and to become her boyfriend's fiancée.

Still on his knees and looking right at her face he had the courage to answer her. "Because right after Dr. Nowitzki kissed me, I felt that I was living in a nightmare, that I don't need to feel anybody's lips on mine but yours, that the person I love the most is you, and that I don't want to waste more time without you. I know we've been living together for a couple of months since the problem with your apartment. I know we already live compromised to each other, but I really want to make it official. I know that you deserve it. I want to give you everything because you've given so much to me, Amy. I mean it. You give me the purest thing in this world, that... that I never thought I'd had, that... that I never asked for but unexpectedly came when you got in my life, true love... Why are you crying? Are you mad at me, or are these ones happy tears? because this is exactly what I hope those to be, I don't want to see my pretty girlfriend sad."

"Stand up you silly clown!" She says between sobs and drying her wet eyes with the fabric that was covering her right arm. "You must to be tired for being holding that position for so long. Sorry

I was shocked. I didn't know what to say, and yes I'm both happy and angry, but now I think we need to talk. Come on in. Let's close the door and have a conversation about this."

He closed the little black velvet box that contained his great-great-great nine-fingered nana's ring and stood up with a grimace in his face because his knees and legs hurted a little.

She stood aside for him to get into her temporary apartment, and he closed the door behind him. She pointed to the couch and said, "before I take seat, I'll let you choose a spot first."

"Awww! Amy, you are so thoughtful!" He said, looking and smiling at her with tenderness. "This is why you are my girl. You know me more that anyone in this (or another) planet."

"Yep! That's me, the thoughtful one, even with the boyfriend she trusted with her life who cheated on her kissing with that one which name I don't want to hear spoken anymore!" She said in a bitter mood.

Sheldon sighed loud in frustration, first because he was struggling trying to find a perfect temporal spot on Amy's temporal apartment couch. He also knew that he'd face Amy with what happened because of Ramona, but his mind did not do enough foreplay for what was happening now - a girlfriend disappointed and mad at him, not that it was a bad thing. He secretly enjoyed her jealousy part, but this was serious. Their relationship could be in danger. All that was so overwhelming for him. He was a fool for not realizing that woman's intentions since the beginning.

What was he thinking? Why was he so blind to see?

"Are you just going to ignore me all night long?" She almost yelled at him.

"Of course not. I'm trying so hard to make my bottom feel comfortable sitting on this couch, but I think I'll stay here, in the right corner of it. Join me; sit beside me" he offered, patting with his left arm the empty spot for her. "And just to be clear, we were not kissing. She did kiss me. She was the one who came to me when I confronted her. I promise I didn't do anything but say 'Excuse me a moment' and go on my way here. I didn't meant to do anything wrong. I'm so so so sorry," he added and shook his head sobbing.

She instantly wrapped her arms around him to comfort him. She was pissed, yes, but it was that cheap bitch's fault. Now she understood that. "I believe you Sheldon. You probably went into shock and couldn't say anything more, but please, not all kind of people have good intentions. It took me so long to become close to you, and you just started to spend so much time with her. I'm going to be absent for three months, and I don't know how long she's going to stay there. Do you know how long her research will take at Caltech?" She asked with interest.

Breaking apart but softly caressing one of her arms he smiled at her. "Thank you for believing me, and honestly I don't know how long she'll stay in Pasadena. She never told and I never asked."

"Well, I'd really appreciate that you keep away from her while I'm here, and when I'm back, I'll want to talk to her if she's still over there spreading her germs in the pool with somebody else's boyfriend," she said, looking seriously at him.

"Hey! Who told you that?" He asked a little surprised.

"Penny and Bernadette. I asked them to keep an eye on you."

"I could notice they were behaving in a strange way when SHE was around, but I really never knew what was going on."

"You are a genius, but sometimes you are so silly," she said with her lips curved up.

"Sooo, what do you say to my proposal?" He asked, looking at her, a little scared of her answer.

"No!"

He could hear his heart shatter like a glass in thousands of little pieces. While her 'NO!' was making a huge echo in his mind he realized that there was no hope left, the little relief he was feeling for a couple of minutes was totally faded now. There were no signals of it anymore, only the pain was left, the pain of a broken soul. It was like being stabbed in the chest by at least ten knives at the same time, over and over. He also thought that he had it coming because in the past he had hurt her so much. He thought he was changing, but no, once again he ruined it.

The confusion filled his mind. She just said she believed him, so why wouldn't she accept the proposal then? It doesn't make any sense. He was struggling trying to figure out what was up in Amy's mind. The frustration was covering him, stifling him, drowning him, like when you don't know how to swim in a sea while its waves are dragging you into its most deep and dangerous part. Sometimes he really hated himself so badly. Back there, when he was acting like he didn't want to be with her in a relationship, he used to punish himself calling himself a worthless piece of human flesh, a hypocrite pretending to be a superior among all those inferior minds, an homus-novus. He would scream in rage against his pillow. A lot of things he has gotten over for her, his reason to be, the one who came in his life like a tornado and changed everything since the very beginning. Since the first time he couldn't help it, he had to look twice at her. He had fallen for her first, but he had been such a fool. Even when she fell for him, her intelligence was so complete that she didn't even fight the feeling for so long like him. She trusted and gave him the chance to let him be loved by her. Certainly all the difficult formulas he easily had solved correctly were nothing compared to try to figure out other's people feelings. Nothing was harder for him than that. Since then he's been trying to learn a lot about it, but it was no use. He didn't know enough to figure out what was happening now. After all those images and flashbacks he opened his mouth "B... b...but" he couldn't articulate any other word.

"Not like this Sheldon. This was a decision you took rashly, and as you previously have said, this is a very important step, not for one but for both of us. I want you to be sure of what an engagement really will mean in our relationship. I want you to think it and see it in your mind from every possible angle. Then if there is nobody else involved in this decision but you and me and you are still willing to have that wonderful journey with me, then I'll pleasantly say 'YES', but I don't want you to feel like this is your way out of THAT problem. We have the language of communication to solve it and not just run away nor making rush decisions in the heat of burning emotions. It's not easy, but we can make it together."

"I totally understand your point, but Amy, as you said, we can make it TOGETHER. You were not with me in that moment. I was vulnerable, hurt, and still processing the fact that we are going to be living away from each other. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to justify my lack of awareness of what was really going on. I'm sorry I was clueless. I don't want to make you feel guilty for leaving and have a significant opportunity in your work field. Science is important too. It's just that now that I see it feels like I spent all that time in some kind of limbo, in my mind I was always craving you. I was always counting the hours, minutes, seconds for our next video calls. My brain told me to build another you inside to be next to me so I could make it without freaking out and losing my mind because of your absence. Amy I can't even be myself anymore when you aren't around. Do you understand that? You are truly important to me. This was not a hurried proposal as you might think. Believe me or not, I have been thinking about it for a long time. I mean it, I just felt that maybe it was the right time, but do not worry. I completely understand you. You want it to be under different circumstances. I respect that, for you, for both of us, because I love you Amy Farrah Fowler, so much!"

Taking a mouthful of air and making a long pause he just realized that he was talking openly about his feelings with her again, nicely, without hard gulps like if there was a big knot constipating his throat. There was no trembling voice. He didn't even feel forced to do it. He had really done it, a physicist talking like a hippie! The worst thing in all this was that the worst wasn't even existing now. He had no fears of being weak and hurt, no more self punishments for exposing his vulnerability and sensibility to her, none of the things he used to think (do and be) when it comes to feelings. He really loved Amy, and he wasn't afraid of admitting it anymore. He was actually feeling stronger and better than ever. Even though she said 'No', now it wasn't painful. Talking about his feelings with her was the most liberating experience he has ever had.

When he saw that Amy started to cry again, he wasn't sure of how to proceed, what to tell her, or ask. He wasn't even sure of how she was feeling, if she was still pissed or if those were happy tears, but his intuition told him to hug her. After two minutes when she stopped crying, he wiped her tears with his thumbs and kissed her cheeks softly swallowing and flavoring the salty liquid inside his mouth. Then she took his hands in hers and looked deeply into his eyes. In that moment he really wished their world would stop, right there, with them looking at each other, more in love than ever, without any physics theories to discuss, without any math problems to solve, without all that shit they were going through now. He was still swimming deep inside his head when suddenly he felt that the spell was broken by her.

"I just want to have a mature, healthy, full of love relationship with the man that I love, and this is exactly the kind of things that prove to me that we've really progressed together, I can say with all the security in the world that I'm not afraid anymore of ending up lonely, without our friends and without you. I trust you Sheldon. I know that you truly love me, and I think even death can't tear us apart. What you've done tonight is a living proof, not just because you've proposed to me, but because you came over here and have spoken with the truth. Then all the things you've said about us tonight, those are the most beautiful words I've ever heard Sheldon. I'm sorry if I let your hopes down a little by saying 'No', but I love you and I really hope you want to live this life, this adventure, next to me. I want you to know that a marriage is not what makes a relationship work. Our bond is built with the effort that we put together in the relationship, and we've achieved that without the need of a piece of paper."

She noticed that he lowered his head a little. "Please Sheldon, understand that I don't mean to reject you. I'm just letting you free of that archaic thought of marriage people used to have. Marriage is not mandatory. If we decide to have it one day, it'll be because we both really want it and not just because our society dictates so."

He rose his head to make eye contact with her again. "But what about my mother? You know her; you know the way she is. She might be okay with it so far, but eventually she'll start to ask and everything. How are we going to face her? I'm not even sure if she is actually aware of what we've been doing; I mean that's a sin for her."

"Exactly. For her it is a sin, but for us it's a physical demonstration of what we feel for each other," she replied, rubbing a leg against his softly and a little seductively.

"And a physical proof of what endocrine system and its hormones can do to our brain and bodies making us look like animals in heat, complying to their purpose of perpetuating their species, without mention of all the creativity we have in it," he added, raising an eyebrow giving her a look with his sparkly blue eyes.

"Yes, that was romantic," she said with sarcasm, but still flattered. "The point is that we don't have to mind her too much. Let's not worry about her right now. She's fine with us living together." She placed a kiss in his cheek and whispered in his left ear, "our day will come."

"The worry is inevitable with me. You should know that, little lady, but I'll try my best to not overthink it, for you, but don't you dare to say I didn't warn you. My mother can be very persuasive. I just stopped worrying about a thing, but now another worry just came to me. Now I realize I didn't take anything with me. What am I going to wear? I'll feel so uncomfortable with the same clothes on tomorrow."

"Do not mind that too much either. I secretly took one of your tees so I could smell your scent while we are not living together. Please don't be mad," she pleaded, looking at him like a sad puppy.

He looked away and sighed. How dare she? But the most important question is; why didn't he even notice that one of his tees was gone? Probably he was so out of his mind, everything was out of control, his world was literally crumbling lately, but at the end he came into the conclusion that it was fine. He actually liked that she took that piece of him to comfort her, and that gave him such a bright idea!

"I'm not mad at you," he answered, turning his look back to her. "I'm actually glad you brought my favourite Flash tee with you, but it doesn't solve what I'm going to wear to sleep tonight. I suppose I can wash my pants, but what about my undergarment?"

"That's a good idea, Sheldon. Before going to bed, you can wash your pants while I make you something yummy for dinner. Then I think I can go early in the morning to a tent I know. I will find some of the undergarments in the style you like. Plus you can sleep with the one you are wearing now," she added with a naughty smile.

"I know why you are smiling, naughty girl. You know I don't like sleeping naked, but desperate moments require for desperate measures. I really hope you can find a decent undergarment for me, white one-hundred percent cotton fabric. Make sure it's soft to the touch but not too slippery."

She stood up and smiled at him "I know your underwear more than you think Dr. Cooper. We live... well, we were living together, remember?"

He took air with his mouth wide open and slapped her ass. She gasped in surprise and made her way to the kitchen. "I have an eidetic memory. I never EVER forget anything, remember?" He sputtered.

"I'm sure you're hungry. It's kind of late, and you need to have your lunch/dinner," she said between giggles, trying to change the subject.

It was so yummy indeed. When he went to wash his pants, the smell that was coming out of the kitchen was torturing him. He was starving because he didn't have the chance to eat lunch in Pasadena and Amy was such a great cook! He was also feeling so awkward of the fact that he'll spend the rest of the night nude, but now it didn't bother him because he was feeling full, not only his stomach, but him, completely, cuddling under a soft blanket with the woman he will always love while watching a French movie in his temporary spot on Amy's temporary apartment couch.

When the movie ended he turned the TV off, and they walked together to her room. He had a little surprise for her. She slid under the covers and waited for him, ogling at his naked body. He was just wearing his undergarment. When they made eye contact, something told her that he was no longer the sweet innocent man she knew. He was a beast about to devour her. The tension filled the small room, and she felt an electric charge running from her spine to all her body. She felt her body shiver and her panties get wet. She smiled wickedly, thanking herself she didn't turn off the light.

Without breaking eye contact, he climbed to the strange bed and positioned his body over her, holding his weight with his left arm. She closed her eyes, trusting his soft caress. He teased her, touching his lips to hers. He felt how she pulled his head closer and took over his mouth. Now she was devouring him, tasting the delicious flavor of his lips. They became desperate and started to squeeze each other's bodies, rubbing their pelvises between moans and gasps. He really was enjoying rubbing his manhood against her hot wet spot. She was pulling him by his hair. The feeling of her heavy breathing on his neck drove him crazy. He started to feel like he was losing control of his body, and he wouldn't allow that. He slowed down the rhythm, and she rapidly got the message.

Her breath was calm again. He got on his knees while covering her neck with kisses as his hands untied the knot on her bathrobe. When he was done, he admired the pale skin of her chest. His penis was hurting in pleasure. It was so hard at that point. Her breasts were exposed now. He looked into her eyes, and she smiled in consent. With that, he took a nipple in his mouth and played with it with his lips. He felt her body tremble under that stimulation, and he loved it. He wanted to please her so bad. After a little while of giving attention to her breasts, he started to crawl down, kissing her tummy and teasing her by touching her inner thighs with the edge of his fingers. She really was enjoying that. He could tell by the way she was swaying her hips. Her back was arching, and the sensual sounds coming out of her throat mixed with her voice calling his name.

His way down was almost ending. When he found himself in front of the source of his favorite nectar, he smiled and looked at her. He heard her breath speed increase as his tongue caressed her sensitive swollen beating button. He drew circles with his tongue and kissed her center. He enjoyed tasting her delicate pink flesh. He was driving her crazy. She couldn't control all the loud noises that came out of her. With the frenetic moves of her pelvis, she called his name desperately while he was pleasuring her. He didn't invade her, even with his fingers. His target was to give her pleasure with his mouth.

When her body warned him that she was close to exploding in ecstasy, he picked up the pace and did it faster. With a noisy groan and a strong shake, she gave it to him. After a few minutes, when she was able to talk again she took him by his hand. She reached for his face and kissed him, deeply.

"I love you" she said with a big smile.

"I love you too," he said smiling back and looking at her as his most precious treasure.

"Now let me help you with that," she said, pushing him to lay on the bed.

He thought about refusing her help, but then he looked down. He really needed her. "Alright," he answered shyly.

She helped him to take his now wet underwear off, grabbed his long penis and slowly started to stroke its length. He hissed when her tongue licked his wet tip because of the precum. He knew that she was playing with him, but what really surprised him was when he felt his testicles were being covered by and hot wet at the same time. The sensation was unfamiliar but extremely pleasant. She sucked them while she stroked him speeding up and slowing down. He was trying to hold it, but he knew he wouldn't be able to do so. Grasping the sheets, he came for her, screaming her name and saying 'I love you' unintelligibly, while he struggled to take his breath back.