Disclaimer: Not mine. Suzanne Collins has all the rights. I just love the characters and had to write something for them.

A/N: Welcome to my contribution for the New Author's Month over at tumblr at loveinpanem.

Nearly two month and 16,000 words later and I can finally present it to you. But this wouldn't have happened if for a couple of very special people, starting with the awesome ladies form LIP: thegirlfromoverthepond, akai-echo, titaniasfics and louezem. Thank you for your dedication and all the work you put in. You're doing a wonderful job.

My biggest, warmest and heartfelt THANK YOU is - together with my INCREDIBLE beta honeylime08 - for my awesome mentor: the unbelievably talented, witty and wonderful xerxia31. I loved working with you so much, and look forward to our future cooperation. :D

And last but not least: to my best friend, Pez. She's not on tumblr, but she helped with this story like it was her own. I love you so much, bestie!

Enough said, let's start with the story. I really hope you enjoy! Thanks for all the support! :)

TUSCANY, MY LOVE

"If you don't show in the next five minutes, she's gonna have a heart attack."

Katniss groans, the strap of her bag constantly slipping from her shoulder. With every other step, she nearly crushes her heels with the suitcase she's pulling behind her. Damn high heels, she should have worn her sneakers. She's a fit person: she jogs, she visits the gym at least twice a week, she loves hiking. Ok, fine. She could eat a little healthier, but between jobs and her sometimes very atypical hours she can't find the time to cook as well. So it's fast food most of the time. But all in all she thinks of herself as a person with good constitution.

Right now, she huffs like a railroad engine, and her feet hurt like she ran a marathon. All the while she tries to hold her cell to her ear and listen to her best friend's calm but slightly sarcastic voice. Even though she's running through a busy airport, she can hear Prim's hysterics in the background.

Code Red it is.

"Hey!" she puffs slightly irritated. "It's not my fault the flight got delayed."

"Hey!" Madge responds immediately. "It's not my fault you didn't take yesterday's flight."

Katniss rolls her eyes and is thankful her best friend can't see it. "Excuse me that my editor wanted to meet. And I'm here now, so tell her to calm down and I'll be there shortly."

"Sometimes I really think you don't know your sister at all. And don't roll your eyes at me."

It's freaky how Madge just knows the stuff she's doing while only listening to her. It's no surprise they're soul-sisters after all.

Katniss slows to a walk. For one, she's simply out of breath and needs a break, plus the extra 30 seconds at the taxi stand won't make a difference.

"Listen, Madgy," she tries again, this time without the sass. "Tell her I'm sorry. That I'm on my way and will arrive soon after lunch. That I promise the next three days are all about her. She should relax and enjoy the time with Mom and Dad and all the relatives she hasn't seen in almost two years."

It's funny, she thinks, but she could swear Madge just rolled her eyes.

They end their phone call just as Katniss steps out into the heat of Tuscany's summer.

xXx

Uncle Haymitch, her mother's older brother, was 19 when he met Evelina Trinchini, an exchange student from Italy. She was superficial, arrogant, and shamelessly flirty - or at least it seemed like it. In reality Effie, as everybody called her, was clever, witty, and generous. Loyal to a T.

It was in the heat of an argument that they started their affair.

It took them six months to realize they were head-over-heels in love with each other. But her exchange year was coming to an end, and before they knew it, Effie had to return to Florence. Haymitch followed her, arguing that as a writer he could work anywhere.

They were like day and night, but somehow made it work. Endless arguments, fights, making up, two sons, four books, and a gorgeous estate in the Chianti valley later, and they still were madly in love.

The year Katniss turned twelve her parents gave her the choice between summer camp or staying for a couple of weeks with family in Italy. Of course she made the decision to visit Italy. Dreary, old summer camp would still be there next year.

It was soon discovered that Haymitch and Katniss had a very unique sort of connection. They were so similar in their behavior, their thinking, even their body language; nobody could deny they were related.

From that moment on, dreary, old summer camp was never an option again. Summers were now spent in Italy. Even as a grown-up she visited frequently, spent her holidays on the tuscan estate, and learned to appreciate Uncle Haymitch's fine taste in wine and his excellence in winemaking.

So when Katniss finally - finally! It's late afternoon already! - arrives at her uncle's estate and stores her suitcase and garment bag in her room, her first visit is to the wine cellar.

"Sweetheart," Haymitch welcomes her with a big hug, the crinkles around his eyes showing his age but mostly his joy that she's back.

"Hey, Uncle Mitch," Katniss sighs, and for the first time today feels herself relax. It feels a little bit like coming home.

"Did you see Primmy, yet?" he inquires, amused, while pushing a glass of wine into her hand. The smell of her uncle's famous Chianti Classico makes her close her eyes as she takes a sip. The ruby red liquid is still her favorite.

"Nah. I had the worst day, so my first stop was down here in the hopes of tasting the latest Abernathy vintage. It gets better every year."

"You still know exactly what to say to make me smile. Complimenting my wine will get you everywhere." They share a grin, but it only lasts a moment before Haymitch sighs, "But it can't be helped, Kitty. Avoiding the crowd won't change a thing. Hurry up, girl! Or your sweet little sister will have a heart attack." His laughter is deep and rumbles through the cellar, the walls reverberating the sound.

Katniss rolls her eyes and takes a last sip. "You're the second person to tell me that today." And with that, she presses a kiss to his cheek before going upstairs in search of her family.

Effie is the first one to spot her, and the screech erupting from her aunt makes her cringe slightly. Seconds later she's once again encased in a tight hug.

"My dear, dear girl! How I've missed you!" the older woman exclaims happily in her still slightly accented English, making a couple of heads turn in their direction.

Katniss embraces her back, and tells herself to ignore the slightly uncomfortable feeling she gets every time someone directs attention towards her, even if it's only within the family. She loves Effie, even though she prattles constantly about fashion, designers and beauty, so Katniss forgives her for the enthusiastic greeting.

It's then that the rest of the family realizes that she's finally arrived. And it's quite a crowd, starting with Prim, and her groom-to-be, Rory, her parents, Rory's parents and younger siblings, Effie as hostess with her sons, Katniss' cousins. Of course Madge and Gale are there, too, with their two beautiful daughters. Katniss adores them.

The moment Effie lets go of her, Katniss has her arms full of her little sister, who's actually half a head taller than herself.

"Finally!" Prim snickers. "For a moment there I thought you would pull a no-show."

"Sis …" Katniss sighs over her shoulder and can't stop the eye-roll. "As if I would miss the social event of the decade."

Prim's laughter sounds like tiny bells, and once again the older Everdeen realizes the effect her sister can have. She's charming, and funny, and stunning. Everything Katniss isn't. And to top everything off, she's a freakin' genius.

While other kids played in kindergarten, Prim solved the most complicated puzzles. When one of the teachers discovered that the child was able to spell every word one told her, they had their answer: Prim had an IQ far above the norm.

Although two years younger than Katniss herself, Prim graduated high school three years before her. Her undergrad studies were finished in a quarter of the time regular people normally needed. Medical School was finished in half the time. Residency followed, before the young woman decided to go into the teaching field of her profession.

At 24 years old, Dr. Primrose Everdeen was the youngest professor to ever teach at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine. When JHSM started a cooperative research program with the University of Florence, Prim was offered a 3 year contract in Italy. Having family near Florence - and Rory's job as a software engineer being flexible - they decided to move to Italy for the next few years.

A squeeze to her hand brings Katniss back to the present. She starts to greet the rest of her extended family, gives hugs and listens to news before Haymitch enters with a couple of bottles of wine and announces that they should finally start with dinner, he's as hungry as a 'fucking bear᾿. Which gets him a reprimand from Effie ("Manners, Haymitch!").

Dinner is amicable and light-hearted. Everyone has something to contribute, and conversation never stops at the table.

At one point Madge excuses herself, grabs her daughters and hustles them, under huge protest and with a stern look from their father, off to bed.

Prim mentions how thankful she is that one of her colleagues agreed to be part of the bridal party on short notice, and what a great help he has been the last couple of weeks. Katniss is intrigued, simply for the fact that while her little sister is amicable towards nearly everyone, she is always reluctant to give high praise. Her recognition is hard-earned.

"He is wonderful," Prim gushes, before she nudges Katniss with her elbow and winks. "I'm sure the both of you will get along beautifully."

And that's when Katniss' mother decides to drop the bomb. Now that she thinks about it, she's surprised it took so long. Still, it catches her off guard. A second ago she was talking quietly with Prim about the bridesmaid dresses when suddenly her mother's voice dominates the entire room.

"So, where's Oliver? Will he arrive later? Or tomorrow?"

While there was a constant humming of conversation in the air just a moment ago, now it's deathly silent. You could hear a pin drop.

"Mom …" Katniss finally tries to answer, already feeling the pounding in her head. It's not like her family doesn't know she and Oliver are no longer together. But she didn't tell them what exactly happened either. Only Prim and Madge know the gory details.

But it seems her mother isn't finished. "A couple of weeks ago, you told us you'd bring him."

"Mom." Even Primrose tries to intervene now, while Mr. Everdeen tries to stop his wife with a calming hand on hers. But it seems not even her husband nor the bride-to-be have any power to stop the oncoming storm.

"I'm just curious," Mrs. Everdeen continues, her eyes resting on her eldest daughter, "Six months ago we thought it would be your wedding we'd be celebrating. After all, everything was organized. And now he's not even here on time? He's going to be a groomsman, isn't he?"

"Jesus Christ, Haydee!" Haymitch's angry growl suddenly fills the room, his glare directed at his sister. "She arrived an hour ago. Give the girl a fucking break!"

"For heaven's sake, Haymitch! Language! Thank goodness there are no children present!" Effie chides her husband once again, who obediently only grumbles under his breath, eyebrows knitted.

At the same time Katniss throws her napkin on the table, her appetite completely lost, clears her throat once and stands up. For months now, the story with her ex-boyfriend has been simmering under the surface, an explosion was bound to happen.

"Thank you for reminding me, Mom, that I forgot to inform everyone in this room that I uninvited Oliver, because he's a cheating, conniving, stupid asshole, who thought it okay to bring his mistress to my apartment and fuck her into oblivion while I was on a photo shoot for two fucking hours. So, excuse me if I decided to attend my sister's wedding without him, and that I'm happy I got rid of this fucking piece of shit. I'm off to bed now, thank you for dinner." Katniss turns to her aunt. "Sorry for all the swearing, Effie."

As she leaves the room she can feel the stares following her. The last thing she hears before she turns the corner and rushes upstairs is Rory's calm voice explaining, "Actually, Haydee, Oliver won't be part of the wedding. The colleague and dear friend of ours that Prim mentioned will take over his part. His name's Peeta Mellark."

xXx

Two days later the estate is filled with people.

Her mother apologizes in the morning after the dinner debacle, stating that she's just worried, because when Katniss told them she and Oliver broke up, she shrugged their relationship off as just another bump in the road in her life. Nothing more.

They were together for four years.

Truth to be told, Katniss doesn't believe in love, although her family seems to be a parade full of people finding their happily-ever-after. Her relationship with Oliver had been fun. At some point she almost imagined herself in love. The next reasonable step would have been marriage. But she never felt like he stole her breath away, or made her heart race.

So when she found him and his dirty little secret in her bedroom, of course she was hurt. But more about the fact she didn't see it coming than the actual cheating. Needless to say she threw them out of her apartment, closely followed by the mattress and all of his remaining stuff.

His last words to her had been, "You're seriously surprised about this?! You're as cold as a fish when it comes to feelings, Katniss!"

Of course she cried. A little. Four days later she felt ok. His parting words had cut her, but she simply ignored it and plunged into her work. She was rewarded with a nomination for the International Photography Award for one of the pictures she sold to National Geographic. It's telling that this made her happier than Oliver ever did.

So, while the major part of her family lives their happily-ever-after with their significant others, Katniss concentrates on her career and is happy with that. Ok, maybe not exactly happy, but content. Yes, content is close enough to happiness, in her opinion.

Therefore, she doesn't really mind going alone to her sister's wedding.

The rehearsal itself is uneventful, everything goes according to plan. The colleague Prim and Rory talked about the night before - What was his name again? Something with Pe? Pa? - arrives a little late. It irritates Katniss slightly, even though her heart seems to skip a beat when she first sees him. He's the epitome of sunshine, nearly blinding: his honey blond hair styled in a short cut, sapphire blue eyes sparkling, his somehow impish smile forming dimples. He's not that much taller than she is, but has broad shoulders and looks downright scrumptious in his grey suit. Handsome gets a totally new meaning.

When he rushes through the garden over to the rest of them, and apologizes profusely to the bridal couple, Katniss' anger vanishes. It seems to have been an honest mistake.

All through the rehearsal, she can't stop her eyes from developing a life of their own and drifting over to him, only to catch him looking back every single time. Which makes her smile softly. It gives her slightly ruffled ego a boost that a very attractive man keeps glancing at her. It even goes as far as her trying to figure out how she's going to be seated beside him at dinner without attracting attention.

Afterwards, her uncle and aunt's estate hums with excitement for tomorrow's event. Prim has never looked lovelier as she and Rory mingle with the people invited to the rehearsal dinner.

While the evening before was spent with alcohol, bright pink feather boas, and bursts of laughter at Prim's bachelorette party - Katniss truly outdid herself - tonight is an elegant affair. It surprises her that so many people are actually here. Wasn't the rehearsal dinner normally an event reserved for the bridal party?

Whatever, she thinks. Her eyes wander over the crowd, unconsciously searching for the attractive groomsman. When she finally spots him, her uncharacteristic giddiness deflates. He's standing with a pixie haired woman at his side and talking to Madge. Although he smiles fondly at her best friend, he looks rather skeptical at the woman beside him every time she says something. Nevertheless he hasn't shrugged off the arm which she has wrapped around his shoulders. When she seems to make yet another comment that makes his frown deepen, the pixie laughs out loud and presses a kiss to his cheek.

Even though the presence of his girlfriend is an unpleasant surprise, Katniss thinks very little of his animated conversation with her best friend, because Gale is also standing with them. But when the girls run up to them and need their father's assistance dragging him away, she can't believe her eyes when she sees him lean into Madge, brush her hair off her shoulder, caress her wrist. And Madge doesn't even seem alarmed in the slightest!

If that hadn't been enough testimony for her, the blatant brush-off and eye roll in the direction of his girlfriend right beside him that follows another of her statements would have been everything she needs to know.

For the next half an hour she mingles, fuming inwardly about the audacity of this man. Who does he think he is? God's gift to womanhood? The attractive ones are always the cockiest.

Finally, she steps up to the bar to order another glass of wine. While she waits she adjusts the neckline of her strapless cocktail dress for approximately the hundredth time tonight, cursing Madge for persuading her to buy it in the first place. It's normally not her style, way too short and it feels like a second skin. Underwear is not an option in this thing. But her best friend insisted that she looked "sinfully hot".

"Hi," a voice interrupts her struggles with the dress, and she gasps slightly out of surprise.

When she turns around she finds herself in the presence of none other than Peeta Mellark (yes, she learned his name by now).

She would have gotten weak in the knees at the smile directed at her if she hadn't witnessed the shameless flirting with Madge. The nerve of him now trying to chat her up. She is about done with the overly flirtatious assholes of this world. Therefore she simply raises one of her eyebrows, scowling at him.

"Hi," she offers curtly, before she grabs her glass of wine, turns around and simply walks away. She's only holding back because she doesn't want to cause a scene on the eve of her sister's wedding.

Katniss is nearly out of earshot when she hears an amused female laugh, and can't help herself but throw a curious glance back. His girlfriend joins him, all spiky hair and skin tight dress, her face nearly … gleeful? Katniss doesn't get it, they must have a very strange relationship. Nethertheless, she can't help but smile proudly when a couple of words reach her ears.

"If I ever saw a brush-off, Peeta, that was the mother of them all."

xXx

Prim is a vision in white.

It's not only Rory who can't take his eyes off of her. Katniss has to use all of her willpower not to burst out in happy tears at the picture of her little sister.

The ceremony is beautiful, as are the vows, and Katniss nearly forgets all about that annoying man from the night before, if he hadn't turned out to be Oliver's replacement. Of course, it's just her luck that one asshole gets replaced by another.

Speeches are given, and they're surprisingly good. The obligatory dances are danced, bride and groom for their first official dance as husband and wife, followed by their father with Prim, Rory with his mom, herself with Gale.

Time flies, and with all the delicious food and splendid wine it's soon time for the newlyweds to wave goodbye to start their honeymoon, leaving all the guests behind to celebrate into the early hours of morning.

Hours after Prim and Rory leave, Katniss finds herself leaning on the bar, but this time a small smile graces her lips. She observes the dance floor, where part of her family is gathered. Moments ago, the band started one of those old, romantic ballads, which somehow makes couples automatically find their way to each other.

She sees her parents sway to the soft tunes, her mother's head resting on her father's shoulder, his hand splayed on the small of her back. Not far from them are Haymitch and Effie, talking quietly to each other, both smiling softly at the other, their swaying out of time with the music. Madge has her arms wrapped around Gale's torso and his fingers play absentmindedly with the strands of hair sweeping down her back. His lips are pressed to her temple.

A surge of sadness rushes through Katniss. It would be a lie to deny that sometimes she feels lonely. Or that she sometimes wishes to feel that kind of happiness, too.

She downs her glass in a single move and reprimands herself, her signature frown back. It's just the sentimentality of the situation, she thinks. And those fucking love songs.

On purpose she lets her eyes wander in the opposite direction of the dance floor, only to catch Peeta Mellark watching her. His smile is much softer than the first one she received from him, not a trace of roguishness to be found. For a second she simply forgets that he annoys the hell out of her, getting lost in his stare which seems to hold her captivated. Suddenly every laugh, every word spoken, every note and sound, turns to background noise. All she can hear is her own breath and the blood rushing through her veins, while her eyes never leave his. The thought that this borders inappropriateness only fleetingly crosses her mind. Time seems to stand still.

And then he winks.

The nerve of that man! The spell broken, she turns her gaze away and gets angry. At him and herself. But more at him. Yes, definitely more at him. It wasn't like she was staring back. At all.

"You're amusing!" she suddenly hears to her right, followed by a chuckle.

When she turns to look at the person laughing at her, she finds the spiky haired woman. Her grin is devilish. Of course, out of everyone, it has to be his damn girlfriend witnessing their staring match.

Not that she was staring. She wasn't.

"Pardon?" Katniss finally finds her voice. Maybe, somehow, she still can conceal that something took place here. She's not even sure what she's talking about.

But then the woman starts to speak, and Katniss doesn't get it how she can still be so amused about all of this. Seriously, what kind of strange relationship do they have?

"At first I simply thought you were immune to his charms. That would have been a miracle on its own, let me tell you. But now I realize there must be something else."

Confusion must be written all over Katniss face. "I don't -"

"Oh, don't play dumb with me, sweetheart. You think I didn't see the staring contest taking place just now?"

Katniss blushes deeply. It's embarrassing to get caught in the first place, but when the other one so blatantly points it out it's simply humiliating. And normally, she's not even the kind of woman who would allow such a situation to take place. Especially after what happened to her.

"I'm so sorry!" Katniss therefore starts, guilt and anger - towards him? Towards herself? She's not even sure anymore - battling a war within her. "Really, I don't even know what happened here, but please, let me assure you that I would never ever make a move on someone else's boyfr-"

The thunderous laugh coming from her right makes her stop mid sentence. Ok, all this laughing at her expense actually makes her a little frustrated. What's up with these people?

"Excuse me, but what is so funny?"

The short-haired woman starts to hiccup from laughter, and Katniss is seconds away from simply turning around and leaving.

"Now I get it!" the other finally presses out between gasps for air. "You're simply brainless! This is going to be so much fun to watch." And with these words, a slight shake of the head, and another burst of laughter, the pixie turns around and walks off.

What. The. Fuck?!

What kind of Twilight Zone Scenario has just taken place here? How much wine had she drunk? What did they put in that cake?

When she's finally able to make out her surroundings again, it registers with Katniss that the music has changed to something faster and that people are no longer dancing in pairs but in one huge crowd. Madge and Gale, now joined by his siblings, signal her to join them.

Her eyes wander in the direction to where the strange woman just disappeared, only to discover that she's standing with Peeta Mellark, still laughing and with tears running down her face, while he seems to be getting paler by the second. When his gaze shoots up abruptly it immediately finds hers.

Fabulous! This couldn't get any more embarrassing. Nethertheless she simply redirects her gaze, juts out her chin, and marches over to her best friends to join them dancing.

So, he and his crazy girlfriend are going to make fun of her? Let them, she couldn't care less! They deserve each other, and she has way better things to do than be bothered by Peeta Mellark's opinion of her.

For the rest of the evening she simply ignores the nagging voice at the back of her mind which calls her a liar.

xXx

It's still early when she steps into the garage and borrows one of the cars. The sun just rises over the hills of Chianti Valley, making the colors richer and deeper, the first rays kissing the tops of the olive trees and grapevines rushing by the window.

It doesn't take her long to arrive at her destination. She parks the car and grabs her camera from the passenger seat.

Although it's been almost three years since she last was here, Katniss still knows the streets like the back of her hand. When she arrives at Piazza del Campo she takes a deep breath and inhales the morning air. It's her favorite time of the day, the place still deserted except for the occasional local. No tourists yet. No street vendors. No constant humming of voices, and life, no oppressive heat. It's like the city takes its breath before another day filled with crowds and noise.

Katniss fell in love with Siena the first time she stepped into it, preferring it over Florence every time. Of course she knows she could never say this out loud or Effie, born and raised in Florence, would be deeply offended. It's no secret the two cities are rivals.

And still, the charm and beauty of the smaller city is undeniable.

She sits down at the piazza, takes out her camera and starts to watch the city through the lens. Now and then, the soft click of the shutter resounds in her ears. She discovers two young women talking, one with a basket full of fresh tablecloths, the other with a watering can. It seems they're preparing the tables of a café for another day of tourists.

And then - she's not sure how it happens - her camera finds the last person she expects to see here.

Peeta Mellark sits leaning against a wall not far from the café, a sketchbook on his knees and a pencil in his hands. He's concentrating, she can tell from the way his eyebrows knit together. In the early morning light his eyelashes seem endless and Katniss wonders how they don't get all tangled up when he blinks.

She shakes her head, reprimanding herself for even thinking stuff like that. She has no business with him and wants to keep it that way. Best thing to do is simply turn around and visit another of her favorite spots in the city. Far away from the blond devil.

Unfortunately, just a moment later something breaks his concentration, and he looks up. Surprise is written over his face when he sees her standing a short distance away. But then it morphs into a soft smile and he raises his hand in greeting.

Awesome, no she has no choice but to at least say hello.

Katniss is still contemplating if a simple wave back will be enough, and she can be on her merry way, when he makes the decision for her by standing up and walking over to her.

She sighs, but at least remembers to be polite. "Good morning."

"Good morning, Katniss. How are you?" He sounds genuine and nice, and she hates him more because of the little jump her heart makes. Treasonous heart, being affected by such a man.

"Fine," she answers, short and pointed.

A silence settles over them, it's nearly painful, and she desperately thinks of a way to say her goodbyes again.

"Did you catch anything good?"

His question takes her by surprise, and first she doesn't understand what he's talking about. Only the pointed look at her camera makes her realize what he means.

"Oh … um, yeah, there should be a shot where the first rays of sun brush over the top of the Torre del Mangia."

Katniss pauses, not sure why she just told him that. She could have said no and gotten on with her day. But there's no time to ponder over the fact, because Peeta addresses her again, and she's astonished more than anything else at his words.

"That sounds wonderful. Prim showed me some of your pictures from the last time you visited here, and I especially loved the one where you captured Haymitch, crouched down in front of a grapevine and smelling the earth on his fingers, engulfed in the morning light spreading over the Abernathy estate. I looked at it and felt at peace. Your talent is exceptional."

And then he smiles at her, full of warmth and joy, his eyes a sparkling azure and his whole expression showing adoration. And she's not sure if it's for her work or for herself.

It makes her thoughts stop, and her heart beating twice as fast, because he's just mentioned the picture she loves most in her portfolio, and she can't help but softly smile back at him.

For the first time in months it feels like all the stress leaves her shoulders, lightening her soul, and letting her breathe. The sun shining on her back not only warms her skin, but reaches into the depths of her being and spreads all the way to the tips of her body.

Something between them shifts, and Katniss can't for the love of god remember why she ever thought him so unbearable.

Peeta's arm still holding the sketchbook lowers a little and she catches a glimpse of his drawing: the slender neck and half exposed shoulder of the young woman with the watering can.

The moment they shared is smoke and mirrors.

"Of course," she murmurs. Her smile vanishes, making room for the typical scowl. She should have known. Lowering her guard was simply stupid. This pervert has nothing else on his mind than pursuing women, and Katniss can't believe she forgot that even for a minute. "I have to go."

Where there was a smile a moment ago, utter confusion now resides on Peeta's face. He grabs at his things. "What … why … Katniss?"

"Goodbye, Peeta." Her tone is cold and brisk, and before he has the chance to inquire about her sudden change of mood, she disappears around a corner and is gone.

xXx

When she comes back to the estate she's still rather irritated.

The thing is, she doesn't get him. When they talked today he seemed nice and charming. Genuine. Oh, and let's not forget, attractive. And the next moment she discovered once again that he's a pervert. With no inhibitions. And no shame.

When she rounds a corner into the garden, deep in thought, it takes her a moment to realize that Madge is walking in her direction.

"You missed breakfast," the blonde snickers, but when she sees her best friend's face, her amusement turns serious. "What happened?"

Katniss shrugs and tries to wave it off, but somehow forgets that Madge can be like a dog with a bone. Her pointed look pierces her down.

"He annoys me," she blurts out, frustration evident in her voice.

"Who?" Madge wants to know, but secretly has a suspicion.

"Peeta Mellark. I ran into him in Siena this morning." Katniss simply states, but can't suppress her eyeroll.

"But why? He's like, the nicest person on earth!" Madge looks at her as if she'd grown a second head.

Katniss grows more irritated. How come he has everybody so wrapped around his finger?

"Excuse me?!" her bewilderment is palpable. "Not only does he think he's God's gift to women, he's also a terrible flirt. You should know!"

Madge is now irritated, too. "What are you talking about? Sometimes you make no sense at all, Katniss."

It's like a dam has broken, and Katniss can't stop blurting out the words. "And I can't believe you didn't recognize his shameful flirting with you the second Gale turned his back. He was all touchy-feely at the rehearsal dinner. Your wrist, your shoulder. And he knows you're married, what does that say about him?"

"What?!" for a second Madge gaps like a fish, before she finds her voice again, her disbelief clearly recognizable. "Katniss! You do realize that Peeta and I go way back, don't you? We both grew up in Old Saybrook, went to school together. It was a nice surprise when we met here. He complimented the bracelet Gale gave me for our wedding anniversary and brushed a wasp from my shoulder so I wouldn't get stung!"

Silence follows in which the two best friends stare at each other.

So, okay, maybe she misinterpreted his actions towards Madge. Now that she explained the situation it makes perfect sense. And it was awfully nice of him, especially with the risk of getting stung himself. Still, that doesn't explain his obnoxious behavior towards his own girlfriend. Surely Madge can't argue that.

"And what about his girlfriend?" Katniss therefore continues. "I can't believe how rude he was to her, rolling his eyes and brushing her off. Nobody deserves that, although their relationship does seem quite strange."

Now Madge is sitting down on the stone wall surrounding the herb garden, and confusion doesn't even explain the look on her face anymore. "What girlfriend?"

Katniss audibly exhales, and can't believe how dense Madge sometimes can be. "The pixie girl? With the spiky hair? And the strange attitude?"

It takes a second, but Katniss sees the moment her best friend realizes who she meant.

The blonde snorts. "Johanna is not his girlfriend. Peeta doesn't have a girlfriend. But let me tell you: it's funny you assume he was making advances when in reality it was her who was shamelessly flirting with me. Peeta stepped in."

Silence.

Well, damn. That actually makes a lot of sense, too. And was quite gentlemanly of him. And she is a fucking idiot, once again seeing something out of context and automatically coming to her own conclusions.

Only now she realizes how incredibly rude she has been every single time they interacted, the last time not even an hour ago. The blush that forms on her face can't be compared to any previous one. She feels like the biggest asshole on earth.

"Oh, sweet Jesus … I'm … Seriously?!"

Madge frowns and nods, her arms crossed in front of her.

"Geez, I really messed up!" Katniss doesn't whine about things, but this situation comes very close to it. Why didn't she simply ask before jumping to conclusions? She can't believe that she misinterpreted his genuine, friendly behavior for a cruel seduction act.

They won't ever let her live this one down.

Madge's anger lasts five seconds, then she relaxes a little and Katniss sees a hint of sympathy flicker over her features. That's her best friend in a nutshell: steadfastly protective when the moment calls for it, but compassionate the very next.

And still, the blonde seems unable to prevent her from more embarrassment.

"And afterwards he still somehow shyly asked about you, because he clearly thought you interesting. And not to forget attractive. It was all over his face."

It feels like a slap in her face. Asshole doesn't even describe her any more. Katniss wishes the ground would open up and swallow her whole. Nothing in her life had ever been this mortifying. Hopefully she'll never see him again, or she probably will die from embarrassment. With a huff she sinks down on the stone wall beside her friend, shoulders hunched and head down.

"Listen," Madge pulls her out of her thoughts. "I can see where this came from. You've had a bad experience, Katniss, and it's understandable that you guard yourself. And with your talent of somehow always completely misinterpreting situations, I can even comprehend your conclusions. I'm sure, when you explain the next time you see him, he will understand."

She wraps an arm around her shoulders and smiles reassuringly. Katniss leans her head against Madge, but can't suppress a groan, "What makes you think I ever want to see him again?"

xXx

The next couple of days are a little … let's say hectic.

Haymitch's deadline for his latest book is approaching, and he needs to concentrate on his writing, while his eldest son, Nate, keeps everything up and running with the winery.

Effie gets a call from one of her celebrity-clients, the shoes they wanted to wear don't match the fabric, or whatever shit they come up with, so her aunt meets up with her contacts at Salvatore Ferragamo in Florence for an emergency meeting. Katniss didn't even know that a personal shopper could have an emergency meeting.

With Katniss being considered part of the Tuscan household by everyone, it falls on her to entertain the remaining guests for the next couple of days.

While they are at the Leaning Tower of Pisa, Katniss has to take approximately 500 pictures of Madge and Gale's girls trying to lean on it, or push it up, or kiss the top.

When they visit Montepulciano it takes her nearly 30 minutes to convince them to try one of the delicious wild boar dishes the area is famous for. She doesn't have to convince them to drink the Vino Nobile di Montepulciano aplenty.

In Pienza Katniss has to remind her father that they're only allowed 23 kg of luggage per person on the flight back, after he nearly buys a shop out of their famous cheese. Only the promise of convincing Haymitch to send some in the future makes him halt his shopping spree.

In Florence they nearly lose Lily, Gale and Madge's 4-year old daughter, on Ponte Vecchio because she's transfixed by a tiara in the window of one of the many jewelry stores. The girl has the loudest cry in history, so they find her shortly after, and italian ice cream is the cure for everything.

Although Katniss loves her family dearly - and it's fun to show them around what feels like her second home - she can't wait for the return of a little peace and quiet. Yes, she missed Italy. She missed the area, the people, and the Tuscan charm. She even missed the heat.

But she also misses the solitude to concentrate on her own work. And none of all this chaos helps her to get started on her new project.

The meeting with her editor that had delayed her arrival in Tuscany, was actually to discuss the next step of her career: a collection of her most valued photos. Pictures that made her known. Pictures of people, of landscapes, of fashion. She has mountains of material, and she needs time to sort everything out, including her ideas.

Six days after the wedding she gets the remaining horde to Peretola Airport near Florence and waves them off as they board the plane to Munich for their connecting flight to JFK.

Madge is the last one to say goodbye, and they share a tight hug.

"Make amends, hon," she whispers in Katniss' ear, "He's truly worth it. I promise." One more tight squeeze and the two friends let go. Katniss knows what her friend is implying. A funny feeling spreads inside her, though she can only guess what it might mean.

When they part - one last wave, one last kiss from the girls - Madge gives her a reassuring smile and winks once. And then they're off.

Suddenly it's quiet around her, even though she stands in an airport. She feels ambivalent about the change. On the one hand she already misses the happy babble from the girls, or Gale and Madge's constant banter like flirting. Her parents and the Hawthorne's conversations and amazement about the things she showed them. On the other hand now she's free to plan her days the way she wants.

With a last smile in the direction her extended family just disappeared, Katniss turns around and starts to leave for the taxi stand.

She stops short when her eyes fall on a blond man a few steps over. What are the odds? It feels like Madge just tempted fate with her half-cryptic order to right her wrongs.

But when the man turns around fully she realizes it's not Peeta. Now that the first shock is gone she even recognizes all the details which don't fit: The blond is a different shade, the shoulders are not wide enough, the eyes are brown and not blue.

Half relieved, half disappointed she continues on her way.

And then, halfway back to the estate, it suddenly dawns on her that somehow she's filed away every single detail she's learned about Peeta Mellark so far.

Panic starts to rise; it's nearly overwhelming in its force. She's not sure, but by the look on the driver's face she must have gasped. Thoughts race in her head, and the blood rushing through her sounds like thundering water in her ears.

What is happening here? Where are all these different feelings coming from? First, attraction. Followed shortly by hate and disappointment. Now, shame. Regret. But the most alarming: desire.

It's the guilt, she tries to convince herself, ignoring these most inconvenient feelings, pushing them back into the depths of her thoughts, and concentrating on her breathing. Thinking like that is not only dangerous, but most of all senseless. Her mind needs to focus on the thing she came here for: her work.

If she ever meets him again, she'll apologize for her behavior and then be on her merry way. He will live his life, and she will live hers, and everyone will be happy. End of story.

For the time being, she convinces herself, simply ignoring yet another thing by pushing it out of her mind. But she can't stop the single thought racing through her head: What is it about Peeta Mellark that she can't stop thinking about him?

xXx

It's raining cats and dogs. The cobblestones of Piazza della Signoria are old and smooth, and therefore so slippery she nearly tumbles down a couple of times. The soles on her sandals are not helping matters. Finding shelter under the Loggia dei Lanzi is useless, tourists are squeezed together tightly there, so Katniss makes a run for the Galleria degli Uffizi.

Somehow she makes it to the entrance of the museum without getting totally soaked through. There are surprisingly few people, and Katniss decides to take the tour. It's been years since she did this, last time she went with Haymitch when she was still in High School.

She forgot how beautiful it is.

She finds da Vinci, and Botticelli, and Michelangelo. Venus' Birth and The Annunciation are exactly as spectacular as the last time she saw them. She gets lost in the paintings and sculptures … and the people watching them. The urge to take her camera and start taking photos of them looking at the wonderful art is nearly overwhelming.

A small group enters the hall, but they don't look like tourists. It takes Katniss a moment, but then she realizes these are people who clearly work in the field of art. Here and there she picks up a phrase or two, but her Italian isn't what it should be, given all the time she's spent here.

When she turns, she finds herself face to face with Peeta Mellark.

He stands a couple of feet away, hands in the pockets of his jeans (and boy, do they fit him well, she can't help but notice), and he appears half surprised, half amused at the fact that she's there.

She'd forgotten that he's an exchange professor at the art department of the university. That's how he knows Prim.

Katniss wants to vanish. She is still mortified by her behavior toward him, and the smile he directs at her doesn't help, especially because she really doesn't deserve it.

It seems she can't make her eyes to cooperate, though. They skim over his figure, take in lean muscles, broad shoulders, sunkissed skin. Forearms carved from marble, like the sculptures surrounding them. She soaks in his appearance - for the first time with no assumptions - and realizes he's beautiful. Her first impression of him being handsome doesn't even come near it.

She allows herself to get weak in the knees, but tries her hardest not to show it. Embarrassment is still the predominant feeling when she's around him.

"Hello, Katniss," he finally breaks the silence. Once again it's him who takes the first step in her direction.

"Hello, Peeta." She sounds like a frightened child, which annoys her and makes her scowl. The laugh from him following that action surprises her.

"There it is," he chuckles. "It's not the same when you don't scowl at me. I'm rather fond of your scowl by now."

This makes her blush, and the urge to simply turn around and flee is strong. But she promised herself to make amends the next time she saw him. Therefore she takes a deep breath and braces herself. With every single spark of courage inside her she finally looks up, their eyes connecting.

His expression is open. Friendly. Somehow tender.

The words get stuck in her throat. Silence stretches between them once again, and Katniss hates herself for being such an idiot when it comes to words and apologies.

It's him who takes a deep breath and starts, "Listen, Katniss -"

But one of the men who entered the gallery with him steps up to them, nodding once in her direction, and then asks him something.

She's too flabbergasted to pay attention, barely notices that Peeta responds to his colleague in fluent Italian before he turns back to her, now looking slightly annoyed.

"I need to go, I've got an appointment with the curator. But …" he pauses, his hand coming up to scratch the back of his neck. A nervous tick, she assumes, which she finds surprisingly endearing. "Could we meet afterwards? I think …" another pause, but this time when he continues he's certain, "I really think we need to clear some things up."

It takes her a moment to process his words, but finally she just nods dumbly.

Peeta rewards her with a blinding smile, then explains he'll be done in about an hour and suggests they meet at the Statue of David.

And this time it's his turn to disappear around a corner before she gets the chance to do more than accept his proposition.

xXx

Within the next hour Katniss changes her mind approximately 27 times. In the end, she decides to simply bite the bullet: apologize for her terrible behavior towards him, then wish him all the best before a swift escape.

The plan she forms in her head (and which repeats itself in an infinite loop) actually takes some of her anxiety away, together with the reminder that he was the one who suggested they talk. And that he acted collected and nice, with no evidence of anger present.

Peeta arrives 54 minutes after their encounter in the Galleria.

"I wasn't sure you'd actually show," he grins, his hands back in the pockets of his jeans, highlighting his beautiful forearms. Katniss is a goner for arms.

She rips herself out of her thoughts and even finds it in her to answer him with half a smile, "I considered bolting."

"Glad in the end you decided not to let me wait for hours."

He's joking, and there's not even a trace of accusation in his voice. It makes Katniss suddenly remember why she agreed to meet him in the first place. Wringing her hands, she tries her hardest not to blush. She knows he deserves an apology more than anything else. So before he gets the chance to continue with idle conversation, Katniss takes a deep breath and tells herself to just get it over with.

"I'm sorry," she blurts out. The dam is broken, there's no stopping her now. "So sorry. I know now that I behaved like a lunatic, blamed you for stuff without knowing the background, assumed the worst of you. Now I know you're neither a shameless flirt nor a cheater, but a gentleman. I was rude, and insensitive, and - to be blunt - a complete asshole. And I'm really, very sorry. I'm not sure I can ever make it up to you. You didn't deserve my brusqueness, nor my anger, or prejudice."

When she's finished the silence is palpable, even in their busy surroundings. Peeta simply stands in front of her and stares. It's intense, she can feel an excited prickle under her skin, the sounds around them still muted to her ears.

"Wow," he interrupts their silence a second later. "I really didn't expect this. Actually, it was me who wanted to apologize to you in case I did something to offend you in the first place, and it being the reason you've been acting so cold towards me. Seems we were both in the wrong." He nearly looks bashful.

Katniss blinks once. Twice. Isn't sure she heard him correctly. "What?!"

"It's fine, Katniss. How about we simply forget about our unlucky start?" he rephrases, even smiles at her again.

"How do you do that?" She looks frustrated and ashamed at the same time, and now his confusion is clearly visible. It takes everything to not stomp her foot like an angry kid.

"Do what?" he inquires, not sure what she means.

"How can you forgive me, just like that? I would hate me if I was in your shoes." Her eyes drop to her feet again, and she can feel the blush rising again in her cheeks. Shame consumes once more. This whole situation is more than uncomfortable.

Surprisingly Peeta only laughs, and there's nothing malicious about it. "So, thank god you're not in my shoes. Yours are way more attractive anyway."

Her blush deepens, but this time for completely different reasons. "Peeta …"

He sobers up, but doesn't lose the friendly tone to his voice. "Listen, Katniss. You apologized, you explained yourself, you feel remorseful. I would be spiteful and narrow-minded to hold a grudge against you when you chastise yourself the way you do. Which - by the way - isn't necessary at all. To be honest, the whole situation is a bit funny. Very romantic comedy, if you ask me."

His smirk is contagious and Katniss actually has to laugh out loud at his explanation. It somehow feels like all the worries she carried on her shoulders the last couple of days simply fall away with his forgiveness. She can't help but join in his friendly banter. "Only that there's nothing romantic going on here."

For a second he pauses, and she could swear his smile freezes on his face, but then he's back to nodding along, together with an amused, "Yeah … um. Of course."

She writes it off as imagination.

"So …" he starts speaking again when their chuckles die down. "Now that we've come to the conclusion that you're not totally disgusted with my presence, how about I buy you some gelato? I happen to know the best gelateria in all of Florence."

She crosses her arms in front of her. "Shouldn't I be the one offering to buy you ice cream?"

His smirk turns mischievous. "Not when you call it plain, ordinary ice cream. It's gelato. That's not the same. And let's face it: You have a lot of groveling to do, so if I say I'm going to buy you some gelato, you simply have to accept it as part of your groveling process."

Katniss playfully groans. "I'm never going to live this down, am I?"

"Nope," he beams, showing his dimples. Now that they've cleared up the situation, she at least doesn't have to feel bad about finding his smile drop dead gorgeous anymore.

Or, him. Like, all of him. Not that she's ever going to admit it out loud.

Peeta nods towards his right, and with an answering smile from Katniss they start to walk.

xXx

Weeks fly by.

Katniss isn't exactly sure how it happens but somehow she finds herself spending quite a lot of her time with Peeta.

Sometimes they share lunch when she happens to be in Florence and he has no lecture. They visit vernissages together; Peeta has a nose for upcoming artists. They go for coffee, or gelato, or a glass of wine.

One evening they join Johanna - who turns out to be part of the university's biology department and not his girlfriend - for dinner and drinks afterwards. When Katniss winds up quite tipsy, Peeta puts her in a cab, wishes her a good night and pays the fare upfront, without her noticing of course.

If asked a couple of weeks ago, Katniss would have vehemently denied that Peeta Mellark could ever be more than an annoying acquaintance.

As it turns out, now she considers him her friend.

"See? I told you!" Madge gloats when they talk over the phone one evening.

"You're going to be obnoxious about this, I can already tell," Katniss deadpans, her cell pressed between her ear and shoulder while she sorts through some of her photos.

"You know me so well, bestie!" the blonde snickers. "I love to be right."

Katniss snorts. "As if I didn't know that."

She misses Madge. It's not the same when they don't see each other regularly. Normally, not a week goes by without them meeting at least once. It makes Katniss cherish Peeta even more, for he often resembles Madge's character. They're both thoughtful and genuine. Friendly. Amiable. Loyal to the bone.

She and Peeta fall into an easy pattern; their friendship feels so natural Katniss can't fathom how she ever thought of him as an asshole.

And then summer turns into autumn. It's harvest season.

And suddenly, everything changes.

xXx

It's October and Abernathy Vineyards is preparing for the vintage. Grape harvest is something special at the estate, as well as the surrounding area. Uncle Haymitch told her once that people were skeptical when they first started as vintners, because they didn't trust an americano to follow their traditions. The other winemakers' respect was hard earned, but in the end, Haymitch succeeded.

The area the vineyard lies in - the zona del Chianti Classico - is the oldest and most prestigious one. Only here is it allowed to produce the Classico, following strict rules and stipulations. Downgrading to a simple Chianti is not allowed. Winemaking is an art here.

Harvest at Abernathy's takes between two and three weeks, during which time the estate hums with life. Harvesting still happens by hand here. It's Effie's favorite time of the year, playing hostess to so many people, while Haymitch looks forward to when the harvest is done and everything returns to normal.

The highlight of harvest season is the wine fest when they're finished. Tons of food is served, lots of wine gets drunk, and live music invites everyone to dance. It's always fun, followed by a huge hangover the next day.

Katniss is leaving the room she claimed as an office for the time being when Effie intercepts her and asks if she wants to invite anyone to the feast.

She pauses when her first thought is to invite Peeta, but shrugs it away as coincidence because she just read an email from him a couple minutes ago. Katniss tells her aunt that she'll ask Peeta if he wants to come, and Effie smiles brightly. "That's wonderful, dear. He's such a nice young man."

When she and Peeta meet for lunch the next day she tells him about it, and he gladly accepts.

xXx

The band switches to softer music.

Katniss feels the world spin slightly and giggles. As it is with her and alcohol, she normally becomes a happy mess, with her inhibitions lowered and her scowl as good as gone. Madge told her a couple years ago she sometimes acts like a completely different person when inebriated, looks younger and free, isn't as serious as normal.

She's not so drunk that she can't tell that now is such an occasion.

Most people have already gone to bed. A few small groups still linger around the bar, but the raucous laughter has changed to muffled conversation.

She and Peeta share one of the loveseats under the gazebo, both of them pressed into opposite corners. From the huge smile on his face Katniss can tell he's slightly drunk as well.

Conversation is easy and never stops, the topics jumping from politics to gossip to art and so on.

"You should wear your hair down more often," he tells her at one point, after taking another sip from his wine. He stretches his arm out on the backrest, so his fingers reach her locks, and starts to play with one of the strands. "It really suits you."

Katniss doesn't even blush, only grins back at him. "That's really nice of you, Peeta. Unfortunately it's very impractical when working." She pauses, but her brain doesn't work as fast in her tipsy state as it normally would, and before she can stop herself she confesses, "You, on the other hand, always look handsome."

If possible, his grin broadens. "Is that so?"

And again her mouth is faster than her brain when she replies, "Come on! You totally know that you're drop dead gorgeous, and to top it off, devilishly charming." She laughs softly, taking another sip.

When her amusement flattens, she realizes that conversation has stalled for the first time since they sat down here. When she offers him a confused look, she's nearly taken aback by the sheer intensity in his eyes. She notices that they have somehow moved closer to each other, her knee pressing into his thigh. His hand brushes her hair out of her face now. Tucks it behind her ear. Repeats the action.

"I think you're beautiful," he says. It's nearly a whisper.

Even half drunk she feels her cheeks redden. Her pulse starts to race, and she's not sure if it's from excitement or fear. Because the look in his eyes scares the shit out of her.

Peeta Mellark is the nicest, most generous and beautiful man she's met in her life. And there's no possible way that he can seriously be interested in her. Not after their disastrous start. He must have seen her inability to trust, or the way she's prone to overreacting. He deserves so much more than to get involved with a broken and insensitive coward.

Her half befuddled brain registers then that he's leaning towards her. Panic rises within her, and every single cell tells her to 'Run away, now!'. The small voice in the back of her mind whispering that this could be something wonderful gets ignored.

With half a cry, half desperate laugh, Katniss jumps up from her seat. Her fingers fumble with the wineglass she's still holding. She avoids looking at him, her eyes fixed on the spot in front of her feet.

"Good … um … good night, Peeta," she tumbles over the words. "Thanks for coming tonight."

And then she flees, nearly running all the way up to her room, the unbraided hair flying behind her, her breath heavy and short. Reminding herself that this is for the best, that she saved herself from more heartbreak. That Peeta is way better off like this, their friendship so much more important than any half-drunken mishap both would regret the next morning.

She will give it a couple days and they'll be back to normal, she's sure of it.

Not once does Katniss turn back, or she would've seen the devastation she's left in her wake.

xXx

A couple days later, nothing is back to normal.

Panic ebbs and flows, and about a week after the "near-incident", Katniss can't handle it any longer. She hugs Haymitch and Effie goodbye and boards a plane back to the States.

"My editor called, we need to meet," she explained while packing her suitcase. "I'm done with the pre-arrangement of the photos; now the real work starts."

Work comes in handy, explains away her rushed departure, and lets her concentrate on something other than the fact that she ignored every single call from Peeta since that fateful evening.

She knows it's a shitty move, but can't help but think that it's also the only possible one. Best to cut off the starting attraction before anyone gets seriously hurt.

As the plane takes off, Katniss stares out the small window, takes in the scenery once more, and allows a single tear to roll down her cheek, not bothering to brush it away.

This is goodbye, and it's for the best.

xXx

When November turns into December, Katniss has nearly forgotten all about Peeta Mellark.

Or at least that's what she tells herself.

In reality, not a day has gone by without her thinking of him at least once. It's the small things that get to her: a glass of wine, a piece of art, a dimpled smile.

Katniss delves into her work, rises early and stays up late. Exhaustion is her constant companion, but at least it occupies her brain most of the time. Only on nights when sleep won't come do her thoughts drift to a gazebo in a familiar garden.

The gallery she and her agent decided on lies near Chelsea Waterside Park. It's a beautiful place, and Katniss can't wait to exhibit her pictures there. Unfortunately, the book presentation together with the showing, and everything around it, requires significant preparation.

She hurries down the street for an appointment with her agent and the gallery-owner. Thanks to New York's public transportation system and its vulnerability to break down at the most inconvenient times, she's already five minutes late.

She's just ended a call with her agent to apologize and explain, when she stops short. Because in front of her - not ten yards away - Peeta Mellark buys a newspaper from a street vendor. He smiles at the lady behind the counter, and Katniss feels her knees get weak. Eight million people in this goddamn city and he's here at this very moment. What are the odds?

He turns around, and before she can react, his eyes settle on her. Katniss sees his surprise. She expects he'll turn around and walk away, without even acknowledging her. Astonished she sees Peeta taking a deep breath and stepping over to where she stands.

"Hello, Katniss," he greets her, and he sounds … normal.

She's relieved; it seems he doesn't hold a grudge against her. Nevertheless she doesn't trust her voice, so she smiles back at him in greeting.

"How are you?" he inquires. Peeta's voice is calm and collected, his posture relaxed, his whole demeanor friendly but also somehow distant.

"I'm … I'm good. Busy. Thank you. And you?" It takes everything for her to sound casual. The urge to throw her arms around him and apologize for her cruel dismissal back in October is nearly overwhelming. Her heartbeat is twice as fast as normal, and despite the chill in the air, her cheeks are glowing and her hands are sweating. Breathing gets harder by the minute.

What is happening?

"Good, I'm good," he answers, still polite, still collected. She hates that all the warmth he once directed at her seems to have frozen in the cold December air. "Back to Columbia, now that my visiting professorship is over. You're still working on your collection?"

Katniss nods and tells him about the gallery around the corner, about the presentation of the book in about two weeks, that preparations are in full swing.

He nods politely, asks questions at the appropriate times.

Before she's ready, he smiles once more, wishes her all the best for her presentation, and then turns around and is gone, swallowed by the people hurrying down the streets.

She wants to call after him, but her knees get weak again, and she has to hold on to the wall beside her. Her breath comes short, her vision is splotchy. Drops of sweat run down the back of her neck; her skin feels clammy.

It takes a couple of minutes for her heartbeat to return to normal, and her breathing to regulate.

Awesome, she thinks. You're working yourself into a panic attack.

When at last her vision turns sharp again, and the weakness in her knees dissipates, Katniss decides from now on she'll slow down a little. After the meeting at the gallery she'll take the rest of the day off. Maybe visit the Hawthornes.

It won't help anyone if she works herself to death. The panic attack right now showed that. Meeting Peeta Mellark was simply the icing on the cake, and gave her already frail nerves reason to go into overdrive.

With a last deep breath she continues her way to the gallery, successfully blocking every thought of Peeta Mellark from her mind.

xXx

"I'm worried about you."

Madge turns around from preparing PB&J sandwiches for the girls and gives her best friend a concerned look. Katniss sits at the Hawthornes' kitchen table, sipping from a mug of hot chocolate. She made her promise true, and drove upstate to visit her best friends after the meeting at the gallery.

"Why?" she replies, curious what Madge means.

"It feels like you're working 24/7, Katniss. Today's the first time in three weeks you had time to come by. And it's not only me, Gale is worried, too. The girls ask about you all the time," the blonde pauses, and Katniss can see she struggles with whether to continue. In the end Madge swallows down her doubts. "Ever since you came back from Italy something has changed. Did something happen there?"

Katniss sighs. Her first instinct is to deny everything, but who's she kidding? She's talking to her best friend. If she can't let Madge know, she can't talk to anyone else.

"You're right," she admits. "I'm worried about myself, too. My schedule needs adjustment; I need to cut back on work a little."

Madge is visibly surprised. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

It takes a few moments, but finally Katniss surrenders and decides to tell her. "Before my meeting at the gallery earlier, I had a full blown panic attack."

"Katniss!" the blonde gasps. Jam is dripping from the spoon onto the countertop, the PBJ's totally forgotten. "What happened? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine now, don't worry. It's just everything with the presentation. I promise, I will take better care of myself. And when opening night is done, I'll take a couple days off." Katniss smiles and takes another sip from her mug, secretly hoping the other woman won't notice that she never answered her first question. There's no reason why she should explain what happened immediately before her panic attack, all the more because it was just mere chance that she had run into Peeta.

But once again, she underestimates Madge. The look Katniss receives is intense, blue eyes boring into silver ones, tearing every carefully crafted layer of nonchalance to shreds. Madge Hawthorne is a bloodhound. "Answer my question: What happened? And don't you dare give me the 'Nothing'-excuse."

"New York public transportation is what happened." She tries nevertheless.

"Bullshit!"

Surprise and shock is written all over Katniss' face. Madge isn't one for swearing. To the contrary, she often reprimands Gale to watch his tongue in the presence of the girls. So when a curse word falls from her lips, Katniss knows she means serious business.

Actually, now that she thinks about it, why shouldn't she tell Madge? It's not like the chance encounter with Peeta has any serious implication on her.

"So, okay," Katniss therefore relents. "I ran into Peeta on my way to the gallery. We talked a little, and then went our separate ways."

For Miss Everdeen, the chapter is closed with this, and she hopes that her friend returns to other topics as well. Even if she's quite sure that hope is in vain.

And she's right.

"When exactly did you have that panic attack?"

Katniss is confused. "What do you mean by 'exactly'? I told you -"

"No!" Madge interrupts. "What happened at the moment you realized you were having a panic attack?"

The scowl on the brunette's face makes her forehead wrinkle, but for the sake of getting done with the topic answers truthfully, "I hurried down the street and unexpectedly ran into Peeta. I started to feel unwell, we talked for a moment, parted, and then I had the attack."

For a couple of seconds everything goes quiet. Madge stares at her, and Katniss can't for the love of it tell why she looks so incredulous.

"Honey …" she finally addresses her, disbelief and sympathy in her voice. "You didn't have a panic attack."

Katniss snorts. "Of course I did. You think I don't know what a panic attack-"

But Madge cuts her off again, and the young woman freezes at her next words.

"You're in love, Katniss!"

It takes her a moment to respond, but then it's her turn to swear. "Bullshit!"

Madge crosses her arms in front of her, one eyebrow skeptically raised, before she starts to count down the facts. "Racing heartbeat, sweating in December, blotchy vision, dizzy feeling, problems with breathing. You tell me you had none of these symptoms and I'll leave you alone."

Katniss bites her tongue and glares at the blonde in front of her, but can't protest. It's hard to admit to any of it, but she would never lie to her best friend.

And clearly she was … or is … or whatever … fond of Peeta. They formed a close friendship while in Italy.

But love?

That's impossible. She's come to terms with the fact that love, marriage and kids aren't in her future. And she's okay with that.

Katniss is so deep in thought she only notices Madge's close proximity when she feels the woman sitting down beside her and squeezing one of her hands. A deep sigh escapes her friend.

"You're so dead-set on believing that love isn't in your cards that you're too blind to see what's right in front of you."

xXx

Shortly after the revelation, Katniss says goodbye, this time dizzy for a totally different reason.

Madge understands, hugs her tight and makes her promise to call if she needs anything. Katniss is thankful but needs some time alone to sort everything out. Especially the question: Is she really in love with Peeta Mellark?

She has no recollection of how she makes it back to her apartment, or to her bedroom, or if she sleeps at all during the night. You're in love, is constantly racing through her thoughts. She tosses and turns the whole night, and when dawn is breaking and the first grey light creeps through the curtains, she's none the wiser.

Around eight she gives in and calls her agent to cancel all appointments for the day. There's no way she can concentrate on anything work-related anyway.

After a quick shower and a half eaten bowl of cereal Katniss finds herself at her desk in her living room, wearing her most comfortable yoga pants and sweater, trying to take a break from her confusing thoughts. Listening to the radio as a distraction turns out to be the worst idea yet, as Mariah constantly blares "All I Want For Christmas Is You" on every fucking station. She aimlessly clicks through pictures on her Mac, the ones she took in Tuscany, but doesn't even register what she's looking at as she jumps from one to the next. It's all a swirl of colors and forms, making no sense.

And then she stops short.

The random clicking stops at one of the photographs she'll show at the gallery. It's her favorite. She worked hours on perfecting the light and color scheme, depth and contrast, sharpness and brilliance.

Only now she discovers why it is her favorite: it's the one single picture she has of Peeta.

It's not even a clear shot, at least not of him. He's off to the right, half of his body not in the picture. The focus is on a little girl in a red dress, her dark locks in two braids, shyly eyeing him while he crouches in front of her and holds out the stuffed animal she accidently dropped. Part of his face is visible, a soft, dimpled smile playing around his lips.

Katniss remembers that day in Montalcino, where they spent an afternoon strolling through town and talking about everything and nothing. They were on their way to a restaurant for an early dinner when they came upon the girl and her mother, who had not realizing that the beloved toy was missing. Peeta had called after them, and when the woman and her daughter turned around, Katniss grabbed her camera by instinct. She also remembers her fascination with the girls typical italian complexion, but her atypical stunning light blue eyes. After she returned home that night Katniss giggled happily when she discovered the perfect shot she had taken.

Months later she realizes that it's Peeta who makes the shot perfect.

She's an idiot!

No.

Wrong.

She's a gigantic idiot!

With a desperate cry Katniss jumps off the chair and rushes to her front door, grabs her keys and phone and ignores the fact that she's not really wearing clothes to leave the house in.

It doesn't matter.

She has to apologize once again, and desperately hopes that Peeta is generous and doesn't turn her down immediately.

Hopefully this time will be the last time she has to ask for his forgiveness.

xXx

The campus of Columbia University is busy, even though temperatures are low. Katniss is freezing in her outfit, only remembering that she didn't bring a warm enough jacket after the taxi was halfway to the school already. But she doesn't let this stop her as she hurries over the vestibule to the arts-building.

As she runs through the doors it strikes her for the first time that she has no idea how to find Peeta. Or if he has a lecture. Or if he's even here today. Katniss pushes these thoughts to the back of her mind and steps up to the digital information board.

She enters his name and a moment later the screen shows her his contact information as well as the room number of his office. The odds are in her favor, too, for he has office hours at the moment. In the blink of an eye she's on the stairs to the second floor.

Before she steps into the corridor where his office is located, Katniss closes her eyes, takes a deep breath and tries to swallow down the knot forming in her throat. She feels like a fish out of water, well outside of her comfort zone. Words don't come easily to her, but she knows they are needed now.

You can do this, she tells herself, desperate to talk to Peeta as soon as possible. Another deep breath and she turns the corner.

And freezes in her tracks.

The blonde woman who has her arms wrapped around Peeta is beautiful. The golden locks flow down to the middle of her back, her figure is voluptuous, and Katniss has never before felt so inadequate as in this very moment.

Peeta's smile is contagious, Katniss can tell, even though at the moment she feels like she might never smile again.

She swallows down her tears when the two people break their embrace, but still hold onto each others arms, smiling and laughing at each other. Katniss is thankful that there are quite a few people surrounding her, so the couple doesn't notice her standing there.

When the woman reaches up to brush a kiss to his cheek, followed by her thumb rubbing over the spot to get rid of some of the lipstick she just left there, Katniss finally turns around and makes her exit. Thankfully Peeta hadn't seen her, or the whole situation would've been more than awkward.

Pain throbs in her chest, rushing through her in waves. Nothing has ever hurt like this before. Katniss feels her eyes getting glassy, but tries her hardest to not let any tears escape.

When I'm home, she promises herself. When she's home she can open up the water works, wallow in self-pity and curse herself over and over again.

Because Peeta Mellark has moved on, and it's her own damn fault.

xXx

She cries herself to sleep two nights in a row. Her break-up with Oliver hadn't made her feel even close to the way she feels right now. And that's considering that she and Peeta weren't even a couple.

Work distracts her only little, even though she tells herself to concentrate on it. She doesn't take another day off. After all, she's a responsible adult, and needs to act like one, not like an emotional teenager broken-hearted over their first crush. When the presentation is done, and opening night at the gallery is over, she will have enough time to give way to despair.

Karma really is a bitch.

Of course she tells Madge all about it a couple days later, and her friend has the decency not to comment on it. Instead, an hour after their talk on the phone she stands in front of Katniss' apartment with a bottle of wine in one hand, a bag full of cookies in the other, and 'The Notebook' in her bag. Katniss thinks she's never loved her more.

There's only one thing Madge asks her before they start the movie, "And you're sure you didn't totally misinterpret the situation yet again?"

Katniss deadpans, "They hugged. And kissed. And beamed at each other. I'm not sure what there is to misinterpret." Madge holds out another Oreo and the two friends close the topic for good.

(When Allie and Noah break up the first time in the movie, both women sob like two emotional teenagers broken-hearted over their first crush.)

xXx

It's the night before the presentation, and Katniss walks into her apartment after picking up Haymitch and Effie from the airport and dropping them off at their hotel. Of course her uncle and aunt were determined to be there for her big, big, big day. Effie's words.

She's just dropped her keys in the bowl beside the door when she gets a phone call from Rue, the assistant provided by her publisher, insisting that she needs to get to the gallery as soon as possible. Something about a light installation or whatever. With a sigh and an eye roll, Katniss grabs her keys again and leaves in the direction of Chelsea.

"I'm here," she calls 20 minutes later from the entrance area into the gallery. "So, where's this light install-"

The words get stuck in her throat when her eyes don't fall on Rue's figure, but on the blond man she's subconsciously pined after for the last couple of weeks. He stands in the middle of the open floor, hands in the front pockets of his jeans, and his eyes following her every move. Half a smirk plays around his mouth and Katniss can feel warmth radiating off him, even from standing all the way over there. The whole situation already feels so different from their chance encounter from a few days ago.

"Peeta …" she whispers, staring at him, and not sure if she's dreaming and will wake up at any moment. "What are you doing here?"

He takes a step towards a small table and busies himself now with a bottle of wine she hadn't realized was there in the first place.

Now that she takes a better look, she notices a loveseat which wasn't there earlier, as well as a little table with two glasses and the aforementioned bottle of wine. And the label on it looks conspicuously familiar.

"Rue let me in. She's a peach. You should keep her as an assistant."

He sounds relaxed, takes the couple of steps over to her and holds out one of the wine glasses. Katniss takes it by reflex, and Peeta steps back over to the table to grab his own glass. She finally finds her voice again.

"How?" She sounds raspy, but at the same time is happy she can speak at all. Even if it's a single syllable.

Peeta seems to understand what she's inquiring about, and shrugs once. "Oh, Madge gave her a call to tell her who I am."

This gets more surreal by the second, but when her best friend's name is mentioned she listens up.

"Madge? That doesn't explain-" she stops again. Taking a deep breath, she squeezes her eyes closed for a moment to gain her composure and hold back the tears. When she opens them again, she puts the glass of wine down, neither in the mood to drink nor feeling like she can handle alcohol at the moment. Then she looks him straight in the eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"We have to talk," he shrugs, putting his glass down as well. He steps back over to her. Katniss feels a gasp leave her when he gently but firmly holds her by her upper arms, preventing her escape. "You really need to stop making assumptions from now on or one of these days my heart might give out."

"Christ, Peeta!" she hisses, her frustration level reaching a new high. None of this makes sense, her heart nearly burst from aching so much, and she only can hold back her tears for so long before she'll turn into an ugly sobbing mess. "Answer my goddamn ques-"

"That night in Italy I wanted to kiss you."

This shuts her up for good. The frustration vanishes, leaving her speechless. The tears she hardly could hold back disappear completely. All kinds of different feelings rush through her, from surprise to panic, to hope and euphoria. She must stare at him for what feels like hours.

Peeta, on the other hand, beams like a kid at Christmas. Katniss feels his thumbs starting to brush her arms where he still holds on to her. The sparkling in his sapphire eyes was never brighter. Even his smile seems softer, warmer.

"And now that I finally have your undivided attention, I will explain a couple of things. Madge called me this afternoon."

Katniss gasps and starts to protest, but Peeta interrupts her by simply continuing. "My turn. As I said: she called. I was surprised about it, let me tell you. She asked how I was doing, if I was looking forward to Christmas, and what the fuck had happened in Italy. Because you're miserable, she told me. And that you stopped talking about me, when before you nearly wouldn't shut up. Which flatters me immensely, by the way, but we will come back to that later. So, Madge tells me all of this, and I get confused. Even more than I already was. Because - I have to tell you - you left me high and dry. And I was hurt, Katniss. And kinda angry, because I didn't know what exactly I'd done wrong to make you vanish on me. And I told myself, if we were to ever meet again, to simply ignore you. Move on. That you wanted nothing to do with me, and that I had to accept that. And then suddenly you were standing there, half chilled through, hair a mess, your eyes the loveliest shade of grey. I tried to act friendly, but nonchalant. Tried to communicate to you that I got your message to leave you alone from now on. I-"

"Stop!"

Katniss shrugs off his hands and takes a step back, ignoring the fact that her tears started to flow after all. She can't listen to him utter another word about her being a insensitive human being and hurting him. If he continues, she might burst at the seams.

He's too stunned by the interruption and her tears to react immediately, but when he finally moves, Katniss raises her arms and stops him from getting nearer.

"We can't be friends anymore, Peeta."

Silence settles in, the air thick with emotions, ready to explode in one direction or another. His eyebrows draw together, his fists tightly clenched at his sides. All signs point to storm.

"Pardon?" He nearly hisses, but she can tell he's still tryings to be calm and collected. The patience of this man …

"I can't. I'm so sorry, really. For everything. I was a fool, and a jackass, and I don't deserve your friendship."

Peeta's expression softens, his whole posture relaxes. "Katniss …"

But she's having none of it, needs to get the words out before the tears choke her up for good. "Please, let me finish, ok? That night at my uncle's estate? I got scared. Shitless. And I reacted in the worst possible way. And it has haunted me ever since. You're the bigger person, Peeta. You came here to make amends, graciously forgiving me again after the way I treated you, and I can't tell you how much this means to me. But I can't be your friend anymore. It would kill me, Peeta."

Once again his eyes fill with confusion, but only a moment later something like realization flickers up, although she has no idea how he could know about her predicament.

He tries again, his patience slowly waning. "Katniss-"

"There's no way I can handle watching you with your girlfriend!" she blurts out before she can stop herself.

She's surprised when instead of discovering a pitying expression on his face, he takes her head in his hands and crushes his lips to hers. At first she can't comprehend what's happening, but only for a moment, before she falls into the kiss with a moan.

Kissing Peeta is like second nature. There's no shyness there, no reluctance. It's straightforward, all-consuming, nearly possessive. She loves the way he consumes her.

"Seriously, Katniss!" he whispers against her lips, his nose rubbing against hers, when they finally have to come up for some much-needed air. "If you would shut up just for a second I could tell you: There is no girlfriend. Didn't I tell you to stop making assumptions? I was getting there before you interrupted my well-prepared speech yet again."

She holds onto the front of his shirt for dear life, afraid her knees might give out if she lets go. Peeta's still holding on to her head, his fingers buried in her hair. His thumbs brush lightly over her cheeks.

Katniss' body tingles where they touch. Which seems to be everywhere since they're so tightly pressed together. The smile he gives her is nearly blinding, but that little bit of doubt in the back of her mind still needs further reassurance.

"But … the blonde girl-"

"Delly. My cousin," he chuckles, and she feels the vibrations all the way down to the tips of her toes. "She was the one you saw me with."

Wait a second … how does he know she was there?

"How do you …" she starts her question, but then it dawns on her. "Madge."

"Exactly," he confirms. The smirk now adorning his face gets mischievous. "Let's recreate that night from October, what do you say? I got the wine, and a loveseat. I couldn't figure out the garden, though."

Now Katniss beams back at him, no longer able to contain her utter joy. "Doesn't matter. Wine and loveseat are enough."

"Katniss, you're beautiful." His fingers secure some strands of hair behind her ear.

Her arms sneak around his waist. "And you're devilishly charming."

He chuckles again, leaning in, and stops shortly before her lips. "May I kiss you now, again?"

Katniss can't stop laughing out loud, at the same time tightening her grip on him.

"I'll allow it."

And before she loses herself completely to the feeling of their kiss, Katniss makes a mental note to send Madge the biggest bouquet in the history of flowers.

xXx

Two Years Later

Exhaustion nearly overwhelms her. With a sigh she leans against the closed door and takes a deep breath.

Vogue pays good money, but after years of frequently working for them she also knows why: some supermodels can be a serious pain. Good thing that by now Katniss is a well enough known photographer that she doesn't have to take all of their shit anymore.

Still, the shoot takes longer than she anticipated. At least the pictures she gets are really good. But she's looking forward to having some time off now.

A loud hiss makes her open her eyes. Buttercup, her sister's ugly orange cat, stares at her, and because she's had an exhausting day Katniss simply stares back. She could swear the cat raises a bored eyebrow before it turns around and strolls back in the direction of the living room.

Katniss glares at the retreating form. "I hate you, you ugly beast."

"Well, thank you, babe. I love you, too."

Peeta steps out of the office down the hall and walks over to her.

Katniss ignores his teasing and gives him a short peck. "If Prim ever asks us to look after this devil-cat again, she can go sit on a tack."

"You're overreacting," he smirks before they step together into the living room.

"Am not," Katniss grumbles, but lets herself get distracted by the delicious smell coming from the table. Buttercup isn't worth all of this attention. "It smells like pizza from Sae's. With pepperoni and mushrooms."

She turns to him with a soft smile. Only now does she realize that she's starving. Her last meal had been breakfast, with only an apple somewhen in between. "You're way too good to me."

"It arrived only a minute ago. Want a beer?"

Katniss nods and sinks down on the couch. A moment later Peeta returns from the kitchen, holds out a cold bottle to her and takes a sip from his own as he sits down beside her. He opens the box on the table and grabs a piece.

After she swallowed nearly half the bottle, she takes another deep breath and feels all the stress leave her shoulders. "I'm glad we're going to have some time off now. It feels like we haven't really seen each other the last couple of weeks."

Katniss shifts and cuddles into his side, taking a bite when he offers his slice. Peeta wraps his arm around her shoulders and presses a kiss to her temple. "I picked up the tickets today, so we're set. I'll drive over to Finnick's around noon tomorrow."

She frowns. "But he won't get you stupid drunk tomorrow, right? If you're hung over the next day I swear to god your best friend will father no more children."

Katniss loves Finnick to bits and pieces, but his ability to get Peeta and himself in trouble at the most inconvenient times is extraordinary. She and Annie - Finnick's wife - could sing a song about it.

Peeta laughs out loud and promises that they'll behave. He grabs another slice and offers it to her. She takes it from him and starts to eat. For a couple minutes they quietly enjoy their pizza.

"Madge and Prim probably will be here before the break of dawn on Friday. Your parents arrive around lunch. We'll meet the rest directly at the city clerk's office about half an hour before we have our appointment."

"Good," Katniss nods and munches on another slice. "When's the flight again?"

"Noon the following day," Peeta replies and swallows a bite of his own. They fall into another comfortable silence.

When their bottles are empty and the whole pizza is eaten, they clean their fingers with a wet wipe and she cuddles back into Peeta's side. Her head rests on his shoulder and she closes her eyes, enjoying the feeling of him running his fingers through her hair. This is the best part after a busy day: relaxing with Peeta.

With a drawn-out sigh Katniss finally turns her gaze and looks up at him.

"Organizing this wedding was way simpler than Prim and Rory's, let me tell you," she snickers, and nuzzles his neck. Takes in the scent of him and once again thanks heaven and the stars for Peeta's patient soul. Especially when it comes to her and her temper.

"Thankfully we're both not keen on rehearsal dinners with a hundred people around. Although, the location would've been nice," Peeta muses playfully.

"You mean a garden?" she inquires, being fully aware that's not what he meant at all. He's talking about Italy, about her uncle and aunt's estate. About the vineyards, and the olive groves, and the fields upon fields of lavender, poppy and mirasols. He's talking about where they'll be in about three days time. She knows all of that, but likes to pretend otherwise. Only to make him say something cheesy and corny, which he knows will make her roll her eyes, but which they both secretly enjoy.

Peeta leans down and kisses her. Deep, and thorough, and with so much love Katniss wants to burst with happiness. She's the luckiest woman on earth.

When they eventually part, Katniss smiles softly at Peeta, looking forward to spending all of her future with him. Starting a family. Growing old together.

He beams at her and doesn't disappoint. "Not simply a garden, no. But where everything started, of course: Tuscany, my love."

FINE