A/N: I accidentally deleted this chapter so I had to post again. Nothing has changed, I just fucked up.

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A couple days after Zabuza leaves, Kakashi wakes in the middle of the night to a shadow looming over his bed.

"Not now," Kakashi groans in annoyance and rolls away.

A normal jonin would be wide awake and reaching for a weapon already. Unfortunately for Kakashi, the stalker problem has completely killed any iota of caution he has.

It takes him a few seconds to realises that none of the dogs (both rescue ones and his own summons) scattered over his apartment alerted him to the intruder. Only his father and Guy can get past without setting the dogs off, and it can't be either of them since his dad would have just woken him up normally and Guy is as silent as a walrus giving birth.

Kakashi rolls over again to face the intruder who somehow got past trained ninja dogs, really hoping it's not Danzo again. That was a traumatic night; being lead to the secret Root lair and interrogated about what he wanted for Christmas.

The shadow at his bedside slowly gains definition from the moonlight streaming through the window. The Root operative stares down at him and Kakashi only now remembers leaving them behind in Wave.

They lift an edge of Kakashi's quilt and starts sliding into the bed with him. Kakashi sits up, incredulous at how the other just steals the pillow and goes straight to sleep.

Kakashi gives up. Yep, he just doesn't care anymore.

He shoves the quilt off his legs and crawls to the end of the bed since he's blocked in by the Root operative and the wall. He then feels his way through the dark room, carefully stepping over the dogs that litter the floor all the way to the front door.

The dogs watch him go in curiosity, having woken up when Kakashi told the intruder to leave. A few stand up, tails wagging.

"I'm going to dad's," Kakashi explains as he slips on some shoes.

A flood of hounds follow him outside and trail him across rooftops.

Kakashi is wandering through the Forest of Death in preparation for the Chunin exams, checking for any tampering. Well, any tampering past what Konoha has officially done.

The participants started arriving a week ago so free jonin and chunin get conscripted into combing through the forty-fourth training ground and disabling any and all pre-set traps. The exams are supposed to be a surprise to see how the contestants think on their feet, but the events always leak considering how many people are needed to set it up.

Kakashi stops at the edge of a quicksand trap and uses a hardening jutsu to cancel out the soft ground.

"Senpai."

Kakashi whirls around in a blur, kunai already in his hand even before he lays eyes on the man who snuck up on him.

Itachi stares at the silver haired jonin.

Kakashi relaxes but doesn't let go of his weapon. Itachi is strange, one of the few where Kakashi can't pinpoint the moment he revealed his face to the other.

The Sharingan is especially dangerous since the wielder's edict memory combined with control over genjutsu means they can pass along the image of Kakashi. If they're good enough, the obsession passes as well. A few Uchiha knew, but the… infection comes with a feeling of possessiveness and most would hold onto the memory rather than freely give it away.

The Hyuuga are just as much of a threat. The mask blocks their eyes, but he has to constantly wear it and always be on guard. Plus, they tend to get suspicious when they can see through everything except one person's clothes.

"I told you to stop sneaking up on me," Kakashi says.

"I apologise, senpai," Itachi replies without sounding very apologetic. "I was passing by and decided to visit. I… thought you had noticed me."

There's something in the younger man's voice that makes Kakashi think he needs to tread carefully. Maybe a double meaning? Kakashi tries to compare the words to standard Konoha code, and then tries with the secret ANBU one but comes up with nothing.

"No," Kakashi says slowly. "No, I didn't notice you."

Itachi nods, his face blank.

Kakashi feels guilty for some reason. "You're very good at stealth," he praises. "I never notice you."

Itachi says nothing, just turns and starts walking away. His expression right as he starts leaving is crushed, like someone killed his family – oh, wait a second.

"Turn yourself in!" Kakashi calls out at the retreating figure because he feels like he needs to try something. "Or at least stop breaking into Konoha!"

There's no reply. Kakashi wasn't really expecting one.

He checks that the quicksand has been neutralised and heads towards the Hokage's tower. He's been ordered specifically to not fight when his more dangerous stalkers show up. It was decided that Kakashi being on good terms with the stalkers means that they don't go out of their way to cause more trouble for Konoha.

Plus, he always reports when he encounters actual threats. He's kind of like a spy – except everyone knows it and he's also mildly unwilling.

Sometimes he hates it. He's better than this -over a thousand jutsu, ANBU at thirteen- and yet he's been commanded to play along. Kakashi understands the logic, but he has pride as well.

Ten minutes to make them drop their guard and one Chidori. That's all he needs.

Kakashi shakes off the part of his mind that immediately starts planning in a cold, clinical process. He's a bit sleep deprived because the Root operative keeps showing up at night and wanting to snuggle, that's all.

Kakashi is walking out of the meeting room, three slips of paper in his hand for his genin to fill out for the chunin exam. Iruka strides after him, determined. Kakashi has honestly thought about this, weighed the pros and cons, and this is the decision he's making regardless if Iruka protests or not.

"Kakashi," Iruka calls out.

"I'm not changing my mind," Kakashi warns. He's known the other since he was twelve; it's best to cut Iruka off early.

"It's not about that," the academy teacher protests, beginning to get that strange look in his eyes that all of Kakashi's victims have. "I just wanted to give you this." He pulls a small pink flower from his pocket and holds it out.

Kakashi starts walking faster.

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A/N: You have no idea how tempted I was to have every Hyuuga be able to see Kakashi's face so it's just an entire clan (cult) dedicated to poor Kakashi.

For those of you who don't remember, Iruka was mentioned last chapter as having been accidentally shown when they were kids. I think Iruka is less 'evil mastermind' and more likely to ask Kakashi out on dates where Iruka gives him flowers and pays for food and walks Kakashi back to his apartment.

Which stalker do you guys like the best? I have a particular fondness for the ANBU commander, who is never mentioned but is definitely watching Kakashi in the background.