A/N If you haven't got the whole disclaimer thing by now, I can't help you. I am not saying it again.
In the words of Mushu from Mulan…. IIII LIIIIVVVVVEEEE!
So when I posted the last chapter, I didn't expect to take nearly a year and a half off before posting the next one. I have seen all the reviews that have come my way and I really appreciate that so many people have enjoyed my little story. I do feel bad for having procrastinated for so long to have done anything towards this but I let life get in the way and then had writer's block, then other pursuits and more writer's block. Before I knew it, more than a year had gone by. Being a dad for two kids is tiring but at least I graduated from university now.
Don't know when the next chapter is going to come out. I have written a proper novel and am now trying to edit it properly which is taking a lot of time. I have started it and know where I want it to go and it continues the same darkish themes that some people seem to really enjoy, hopefully it will be up in the next couple weeks but I am not making promises. In the meantime, because I have been taking so long to get another chapter out, and because I have had so many people commenting that they loved the krogan reviews, I figured I would put this little bonus chapter up as both an apology and a notice that this story is not abandoned. Thanks for sticking with me awesome readers!
TL;DR – Sorry for taking so long. It's life. Wrote a book and now editing. Not sure when the next proper chapter for this story will be but hopefully not too long. This is my apology chapter coz people like krogan movie reviews.
Hope everyone is staying COVID-19 free!
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BONUS (I'M SORRY) CHAPTER
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Krogan Word
Ognut Grax
Citadel Weekly Factoral
Aliens
You know what? I haven't really had too much interaction with humans outside of these vids. I think that needs to change, coz they seem to know how to think up one helluva challenge. These xenomorph things might be even better than dinosaurs! Hell, you manage to tame these things and I don't that any merc in the galaxy would face you without pissing themselves. Soooo STG… if you can get on to making one, can I have it?
Can you imagine if some dumbass asari tried mating with one? Actually, I think I'm in love now! The bloodshed would be glorious!
Oh, but no face-huggers. Even I ain't dumb enough to want that happening to me.
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Dirty Harry
I think I found it. The first honorary krogan from human civilisation. The way he was taunting that first criminal? Didn't even stop eating his food! I did the same thing to some random turian merc a couple hundred years ago out on Omega. This guy had a quad and a lack of respect for idiots that I think I can get behind. And the way he dealt with the jumper? Good way to stop stupid people by messing with their heads.
Also, to the dumbass that thought that I was giving advice on how to kill people with tomahawks in that other review, I really didn't enjoy being dragged into CSEC to answer questions on why I was giving out murder ideas. So you better get the hell of the Citadel with that nonsense before I find out who you are. That sorta killing is for places in the Terminus you moron. Get it right, rookie!
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John Wick
Is this part of the standard Alliance training program? Coz it probably should be. All I know is that human mercs ain't like this. That's probably a good thing though. Most of them are dumb as rocks. If they fought like this guy, they could probably rule Omega. I imagine that they would be 'retired' by the Council before that happened. So heads up Alliance, if your soldiers were all this good, then be ready for the Council to 'request' you make changes to your training program. Trust me, we krogan know how they deal with people they consider threatening.
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The Terminator
I kinda imagine that this is similar to how a fight against the geth would be if they wanted to straight up attack the rest of the galaxy. I fought against them maybe a hundred and fifty years ago and they did build themselves to kinda look like the quarians. If they managed to put themselves in fake biosuits, then that would probably be bad. Of course, us krogan would be fine but it would be pretty funny to see the Council crap themselves about finding out who the real threats were.
You know, until the salarians just decide to wipe out the quarians… again.
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Terminator 2
I dunno what to make of this film. I mean, great action and effects and stuff. Blowing up that building was nice, (I already ordered a minigun from some guy on earth that the vid owner knew). All in all, a helluva vid. I just don't see a geth fighting with humans to help stop other robots and then killing itself to make sure that everyone wins.
Also, that grenade launcher? If someone can stop sending me erection pills and send me that instead, I wouldn't need the damn pills!
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Mad Max
Believe it or not, if there was an actual law enforcement on Tuchanka, or even if there was a vigilante that had a problem with the Blood Pack, this is probably close to how I imagine it going. Just, you know, with more krogan. And explosions. And probably a thresher maw. The scenery looks about right though.
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The Notebook
Not gonna lie. I got bored and fell asleep. I didn't need to stay awake through something that was clearly what would pass as an asari romance film.
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Lethal Weapon
Did the whole series. Not bad. Gotta admit that I liked that Riggs guy. Don't think he would last long as a cop in CSEC but it would be funny while it lasted. Like the beginning of the 4th one where he convinced his partner to run around naked in front of a flamethrower? I actually could picture some dumb turian merc doing that in front of a vorcha as a distraction. Made me laugh my hump off.
But yeah, they would be fired real quick in CSEC. Shame.
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Saw
It's not often you see something that looks like a mind screw from any vids other than the salarians, and those ones are more about facts and stuff. This is more like a batarian torture chamber. The later films had more blood but they were more like blood for bloods sake. Gimme a straight up fight any day over this sorta thing.
Pretty sure that I saw the batarian film critic playing with himself during those blood scenes though.
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A/N Did you like the extra krogan reviews? Send me a review and let me know! And Follow/Favourite while you are at it.
As I said before, didn't mean to let it go this long before I updated so I hope this little bonus chapter is a sufficient apology as well as a notice that this story is not over yet. If there are other movies that you want a krogan review on, let me know in either reviews or through a message. Flames are ignored.
Anyone notice the Legion similarities with Terminator 2?
Stay safe friends.