Kotoko's teachers were extremely pleased that she had been accepted into her preferred university. They made a point of congratulating her, and several of them kept her listening to drawn-out reminiscences of past trips to Kobe and enough contradictory advice to confuse a guided missile. The Class A teachers were not so pleased at Naoki's decision, and he too was the recipient of long-winded (and, in the end, unfruitful) arguments to reconsider.

Kotoko had been dreading the response that Kinnosuke would provide. It proved to have a twist from left field. "Kotoko! You're finally leaving that damned Irie house! It's too bad you're going so far away, but I've got some great news to cheer you up. Did you know that Kobe is only a half hour from my old stomping grounds? Expect to see me whenever your dad gives me time off!"

"Uh, Kin-chan," Satomi ventured, "you do know that Irie-kun is going to the same college as Kotoko?"

"Huh? Ha! That's a good one! His dad won't let the genius of Japan and heir of Pandai go anywhere but Todai, no matter what he's saying now."

"But Irie-kun didn't take Todai's test!" Jinko insisted.

Kinnosuke waved that argument away. "I know I've made fun of him being a super Class A nerd, but this time I'm glad that's what he is. No school's gonna turn him away!"

"Give it up, Jinko," Satomi advised. "No need to waste any more breath trying to change his closed mind."

As the school year wound to an end, Mrs. Irie's excitement grew. Kotoko tried to curb her enthusiasm over furnishing the rental house, primarily because she didn't want another pink bedroom.

"Tell her that pink is too juvenile a color for a college student," suggested Naoki.

"I did," she replied glumly. "Now she's talking flamingo and watermelon. But do you know what? They're still pink!"

Finally the big day arrived. Kotoko and Kinnosuke had been chosen to be the representatives who would present the diplomas to Class F: Kotoko for her unprecedented academic achievement, and Kinnosuke as a consolation prize for being the one student in the school who was accepted to no college whatsoever.

Blissfully unaware of the reasoning behind his selection, Kinnosuke had woven an elaborate daydream about his and Kotoko's future. "Y'see, guys," he concluded his narration to Dozo and Gintaro for the seventh time, "it's a done deal when the teachers, who've been with us these past three years, think that we belong together!"

From that erroneous assumption, his imagination took a hop, skip and a flying leap and substituted "wedding" for "graduation" as the ceremony on tap for the day. The sun slanting through the high gymnasium windows shone down upon him like a benediction from heaven and even allowed him to smile blissfully through Naoki's valedictory speech. As he and Kotoko approached the steps of the stage, he felt the eyes of the audience (congregation!) upon him and projected himself completely into the bridal fantasy.

"C'mon, Kotoko, we've gotta link arms," Kinnosuke urged as they made their way down the aisle.

She gave him a sideways glance. "They didn't mention that in rehearsal. I think I'll walk normally."

Undeterred, he continued. "Ahhh...this is a great feeling, isn't it? Everyone is gazing so warmly at us."

"Crap," she muttered, "I bet Obasama is recording this!"

"Yes," he sighed, "a videotaped souvenir of the ceremony. And one of the onlookers is that jerk Irie." Even in his presumed moment of triumph, he was unable to be a good sport. He turned and hissed, "Loser!" at Naoki, who just shrugged.

When the headmaster identified them to the assembly and spoke their names, he responded to what he thought were the wedding vows. "I do!" he shouted.

"Do what?" asked a peeved Kotoko, now in possession of all the diplomas, since the daydreamer had ignored the ones he was supposed to receive. "Concentrate. You're not the only one up here, you know."

"Oh, you don't want traditional vows? Well, you are an independent spirit. Here goes!" He turned, grabbing the microphone from the startled headmaster. "Today I declare my intention of taking Aihara Kotoko as my bride. I will not go to college like some freaky nerd‒yeah, I'm lookin' at you, Irie!‒but will work my way up in society with my own will, strength and hands!"

Watanabe leaned over to Naoki. "Have you any idea what he's doing?"

"Besides embarrassing Kotoko? Having a nervous breakdown, maybe."

"You, my witnesses, have all heard my public avowal of love. Since Kotoko and I are perfect together, I bet there are no objections," he jeered in Class A's direction.

"I object!" came from the back. Naoki and Kotoko both closed their eyes, recognizing Mrs. Irie's strident voice. "Kotoko will never belong to you! Tell her, Onii-chan!" Mr. Irie frantically tried to get her to sit down while Mr. Aihara, channeling his inner paparazzi, focused the camera on her for an extreme closeup.

"I feel for you, man," Watanabe whispered.

"Kin-chan, give the microphone back so our classmates can get their diplomas." Kotoko tried to reason with the deluded boy.

"We have something more important to do. We need to seal the deal with a kiss. How about it, bride?" He leaned over, eyes closed and lips puckered.

"Are you going to stop him?" Watanabe asked at the exact moment Naoki's mother shouted the same question.

"No need," he replied calmly. "I believe he just overloaded her annoyance meter."

Kotoko swung the stack of heavy cardboard upwards and cracked it into Kinnosuke's chin. His eyes crossed from the blow before he let out a high-pitched yelp when she stomped on his foot with her new shoes ("Only four centimeter heels, Kotoko-chan, surely you can manage that!"). For the coup de grace, she kicked him in the back of one knee, and he rolled down the stairs to land at Naoki's feet.

He leaned down and, once he was sure Kinnosuke's eyes had refocused, spoke softly, "I believe the 'bride' said 'I don't'." Since the ersatz bridegroom still held the microphone in his loose grasp, the entire auditorium was privy to the comment.

Kotoko, who had retained her grip on the diplomas, held them above her head with both hands, like Rocky displaying his championship belt, to the cheers and laughter of more than just her Class F classmates.

"That was quite a show you put on, Kotoko-chan," Mrs. Irie commented as she smoothed the girl's hair after the ceremony.

"It wasn't too ladylike, was it?" She bowed her head in apology.

"Never mind!" She hugged her. "Considering the situation, I think your tomboy persona had the correct response! Perhaps it's just as well that most of my lessons didn't 'take'. So," she turned to Kotoko's friends, "are you two excited to have put high school behind you?"

"Sure," said Jinko. "It's been a‒holy moley, wouldja look at them!" A couple of recent graduates were kissing at the corner of the building.

"Over there too!" Mrs. Irie pointed toward some bushes. "I must find Onii-chan! I need a picture of the two of you. Surely he can't refuse me today!" She departed in a rush.

Kotoko turned to her friends. "Satomi, are you and Watanabe going to take pictures together?"

"No," she replied, "we've called it off."

"What?!" Her friends were astounded.

"Well, he needs to concentrate on his studies. Waseda University is quite demanding, from what I hear."

"But still‒! It's not that far away!"

"You could have made it work!"

"We weren't that serious," she tried to reassure them. "Besides, I could tell that I didn't hold all of his heart, and that's a deal-breaker for me!" She tossed her head.

The girls nodded at each other. Satomi could be high maintenance at times.

"Although," she laid a finger at the corner of her mouth, "I have determined what my type is."

"Type?"

"There's just something about a man in glasses…" she sighed.

"Kotoko-chan! Kotoko-chan! I found him!" Mrs. Irie was headed that way with her elder son in tow, an irritated albeit resigned expression on his face.

"Now!" she ordered him sternly, "I want a picture of you and Kotoko-chan. No arguments! After that imbecilic performance inside, we need to set the record straight."

"Set the record straight?" Turning, he grinned at Kotoko and grabbed her diploma holder and tossed it, along with his, to the girls. "Why not?" He took hold of Kotoko's shoulders and began to lower his head, only to be stopped a few centimeters from her face by a hand firmly planted on his breastbone.

"Hold it!" Kotoko glared at him, although a twinkle could be seen in her eye, "what about not wanting to provide your mother with‒what was it?‒'enjoyment and triumph'? Have you changed your mind?"

"Not at all!" He winked at her. "But just imagine her frustration at the fact that we're moving over 400 kilometers away where she can't pop in and spy on us at any time."

"Why do I like that little spiteful streak in you?" she asked rhetorically. "Well, since that's the case," she tugged him closer by his school tie, "let's go for it!" And thus began the most dramatic and romantic kiss ever seen on the Tonan campus.

Naoki's mother stood frozen. "Dammit, the camera!" Satomi pried it from her hands and proceeded to record the moment for the Irie photography archives in her place. Not that it was necessary, considering the number of cell phones being held up by the rapidly expanding audience.

Shaking herself out of her trance, Mrs. Irie fell to her knees, raised her arms to the sky and cried, "Yes! I will have my grandbabies!"

Somewhere in the distance was heard a plaintive, "No-o-o!"

A/N: Thank you for reading my alternate timeline with a feisty, non-feminine and frequently potty-mouthed Kotoko. I may have a college sequel if I can think up a halfway decent plot to string together the scenes that have already come to me. Right now I'm going to try to complete the Kotoko Volant series with the pregnancy story. (My husband almost had a heart attack when he saw the book I purchased for that segment's research!)