"Hello. My name is Yugi. Nice to meet you."

Yami stared, slack jawed at the uncannily realistic child in front of him. It looked remarkably like him, from the same colorful hair to the same short stature. Of course, just like he'd ordered, the eyes were different - an amethyst color. Although the face appeared slightly different too, softer and less mature.

But maybe that's just him being a robot.

"Are you alright, Yami?" Yugi asked, his voice sounding concerned.

Yami blinked, then forced a shaky smile. "Yeah, I'm fine. Want to come into the living room and sit down?" He held the door open wider to let the robot walk in.

"Thank you," Yugi said with a smile. He stepped inside, placing his shoes next to Yami's before taking a seat on one of the couches. He looked so human that Yami wanted to check if Yugi wasn't a kid that got lost… but no, a random kid wouldn't know his name.

Sighing, Yami recalled the details of the contract. His father thought he needed some friends, but Yami had seriously disagreed. So if his grades didn't improve within a month of being in close proximity to a positive influence - positive being a robot his father had let him custom-order - then his father would leave him alone.

Neglecting his grades for a month. Seemed easy enough to Yami.

Now the problem was, how to make sure this 'positive influence' didn't die before the month was up.

Yami had forgotten to look that up.

"Hey, Yugi," he said, impressed when the child's head turned in his direction, wearing an expression of recognition, "Do you eat or need oil or what?"

Yugi smiled. "I can process energy a number of ways. The most convenient would be charging, but food, most liquids, sweets, and various other materials are also acceptable to intake." The child tilted his head, his face appearing to be hopeful. "Was that helpful, Yami?"

If it weren't for the fact Yugi's speech patterns were slightly stilted, he would seem entirely alive.

Rolling his eyes, Yami shook his head. "Yeah, so… I guess I could basically just give you whatever. That's not exactly interesting. Is there anything you prefer?"

"The most convenient method would be charging. In order to do that, you will need a separate wire that will allow me to plug into any outlet within your house. It takes approximately 50 minutes to fully recharge; 2% per minute. However, for the most basic functions only 1% is spent per hour."

"Right…" Yami made a face. "How's some bacon sound?"

"That would also be efficient," Yugi said agreeably, smile still on his face.

Getting up, Yami walked over to the fridge and pulled out a packet of instant bacon. He started to put it in the microwave when Yugi, who was watching, suggested, "To save you the unnecessary labor, you could give me the bacon directly."

Yami looked at the oil-caked strips of bacon before shaking his head, closing the microwave door. "No way, that's disgusting, ever for a robot," Yami said, pressing the buttons and watching the microwave turn on. "Even if you have no tastebuds… that's still gross."

"I have tastebuds," Yugi unexpectedly said. "There are sensors that allow me to detect exactly what I am consuming, as a safety-mechanism in the event of it being something I am unable to process. If that is the case," here, Yugi was apparently programmed with a sardonic expression and tone, "I regurgitate it so as to not absorb anything that could harm my systems."

The microwave beeped. Yami pulled it out, handing the plate to Yugi. "There, eat," Yami ordered, not having listened to Yugi's explanation after the first sentence.

Yugi started eating. Yami watched, slightly disappointed when Yugi didn't have any wires or something hanging from his throat. "Are you sure you're a robot?" he asked skeptically.

"Yes," Yugi said, finishing the bacon, "I am a robot. Would you like for me to show you evidence?"

"Absolutely," Yami replied.

Putting down the plate, Yugi turned his back to Yami and pressed the area on the nape of his neck, just below the hairline. A panel opened, revealing something that resembled a computer port. "This is where the charger would plug into," Yugi explained with a smile.

"Huh." Yami shrugged. "Alright, well…" He frowned. "Is there anything I really have to worry about with you?"

Yugi shook his head. "No. I am programmed to be what you want. A brother, a friend, a helper, and more. The only thing I am unable to be is an opponent, since the particular model you have ordered does not have that capability."

"Okay. So I could just leave you in a room for the month, and there'd be no problem."

"None at all!" Yugi confirmed cheerfully.

Yami rolled his eyes. "That's kind of depressing. I know you're a robot, but…" He shrugged. "Well, I can't do that anyway. Father already enrolled you into my school as my cousin, and the month doesn't count if I don't interact with you." He eyed Yugi with distaste. "Although, how's someone who defers to me as much as you do supposed to be a positive influence? Seems kinda pointless to me."

"I believe it was because your father felt you would prefer him buy a robot rather than buy a friend," Yugi said pleasantly.

"That sounds like father…"

Abruptly Yugi said, "May I ask a question?"

"You can ask questions?" Yami said disbelievingly.

"Yes!" Yugi confirmed. "In order to improve my performance I may request information at any time. I will then adjust depending on your reaction and response."

"I… see… well then, go ahead and ask," Yami said unwillingly.

Yugi smiled. "In my database I noticed children generally refer to their male parent as dad, daddy, papa, or several other variations depending on the region and language. This usually occurs in ages 1-13, often becoming dad or father in later years. Father is an extremely formal way of referring to your male parent. My question is: why do you speak so formally with and about your male parent at such a young age?"

"Uh…" Yami hesitated. "Well, technically, I'm already fourteen. And besides, that's… irrelevant. It's not important."

Yugi smiled as he nodded. He was computing Yami's voice and had come to the conclusion that Yami was lying. Yugi scanned his list of possible reasons Yami would lie and came up with three plausible explanations for the action that deviated from Yami's normal attitude.

1) It was a habit [ subject ] was accustomed to, not having a set reason to explain their actions.

2) It is something personal to [ subject ] that [ subject ] did not want to share with a robot.

3) It is something [ subject ] does not like thinking about, to the extent they won't talk about it.

After running through the options, Yugi discarded possibility no. 2 due to the carelessness with which Yami talked to Yami. Judging from Yami's speech patterns so far, it seemed unlikely Yami would think very much about anything he told Yugi. Devoting several processors to the remaining options, Yugi returned his attention to Yami. All of this took roughly 3 seconds.

"Yugi, go to your room, alright? I'll see you later," Yami told him. "Probably around dinner, I'm tired. I'm gonna go crash…"

Yugi's brain nearly crashed at the statement as he identified what Yami said. "My… room…?" Yugi echoed, using the voice pattern for confusion. He had been told he would be sleeping in the same room as Yami, albeit on a spare bed. What Yami had said indicated this would not be the case.

"Yeah. Your room." Yami looked at Yugi with an expression resembling exasperation. "What a time for you to act even more human. I thought robots just accepted whatever they were told?"

Yugi smiled. "When information and pre-programmed data clash, I need to decide which is more relevant, depending on the source, the content, the…"

Yami interrupted, which was unexpected since previously he had not cut Yugi off yet. Yugi immediately stopped talking as he listened to what Yami was saying. Which was, "Okay, okay, I got it alright? What pre-programmed data did you have, and who told it to you?"

"Your father," Yugi replied promptly. "He informed me that while staying here, I would shut down on a spare bed in your bedroom. Shut down or, if you prefer, sleep."

"Why would I prefer you to sleep? Wouldn't shutting down completely save energy?"

"Normally, yes," Yugi agreed. "However, it has been discovered most patrons prefer to charge their robots and have them sleep due to the fact that it takes approximately 3 minutes for a robot to restart all facilities. This, most felt, was too long a wait."

Yami shrugged. "Just shut down. I don't mind you taking a while to restart, I'm not a morning person anyways." He sighed. "Actually, don't get restarted until ten. I have no interest in waking up before then." He grinned.

Yugi returned the expression. Then Yugi asked, "It is already 11:00 am. Are you going to have lunch soon?"

"Oh, wow," Yami said, glancing at the clock. "I didn't notice at all. I should probably have lunch after all… Is there anything you'd prefer?"

"Nope!" Yugi said cheerfully.

Yami rolled his eyes. "Why do I bother asking…?" he mumbled, walking to the fridge. "Hey, do you have any other functions besides… being a human robot? Robot human? Or something?"

"Indeed," Yugi told him, watching as Yami scrounged through the fridge for food. "I am able to do a variety of things, but these applications are inactive unless otherwise requested in order to devote my processors to activities of higher priority to me."

Yami raised an eyebrow as he glanced back at Yugi. "Really? Can you play music, then, or are you talking about a different kind of application?"

Yugi smiled serenely. "I can play music if that is what you want." Holding out his left hand, a section of 'skin' slid back to reveal a glass square colored black set into the palm. Although it was off, it was recognizable as a liquid-crystal display screen. He kept his hand turned upwards, tilted slightly in Yami's direction.

"Then…" Yami thought for a moment, closing the fridge door. "Can you play music from online…?"

Yugi nodded. "Of course!"

"Can you actually sing, not just play music?"

The robot blinked. There was a moment of silence before Yugi responded, "Unfortunately, the voice patterns I am programmed with are unable to follow a melody properly. Due to the consistent change in pitch and volume, it would require encoding that I cannot do myself." He smiled, arranging his face in an apologetic expression. "I'm sorry I failed your expectations."

Yami waved his apology away. "I was just curious." A grin crossed his face. "I wonder… if you have other limits?"

Yugi studied his face, identifying the emotion on it as mischief. He reached the conclusion that this would not be good for his future. "Yami," Yugi said suddenly, putting his hand back down and letting the panel close again, "If you just ask, I am sure I can satisfy your curiosity. I am only a robot, after all. I do not have as many capabilities as you think."

In an act of self-preservation, Yugi had decided on this course of action in order to keep the relationship between him and Yami peaceful.

"Oh…" Yami made a face. "That's no fun. Can you dance?"

Yugi paused for a moment, running through various definitions of dancing. Finally he answered, "I could… I know a form of martial arts that resembles dancing. However, it is not something I can do without a set choreography to follow." He smiled.

Yami frowned. "Is there anything you can do on your own that's fun?" He sat across from Yugi.

"I… can…" Yugi blinked. "Play games."

"Creative, I meant," Yami elaborated.

Yugi smiled, his expression tinged with helplessness. "I… I don't know. I… I…"

"Wow," Yami said, "I think that's the first time you've stammered so much. What's going on in that brain of yours?"

"My processors keep changing actions, forcing me to restart my sentence," Yugi admitted. "You are a different individual. Very few question their robots so extensively. Most of them use their robots for rather exclusive roles, rarely being as curious as you have been."

Yami shrugged. "Alright then. Can you imitate voices?"

Yugi grinned. "I can record voices and reiterate them flawlessly. With enough samples," here he noted Yami's steadily growing smirk that echoed his earlier mischievous expression, "I am able to manipulate the pitch and words to fit whatever I am saying."

"Is that so…" Yami drawled. He thought for a moment. "Can you gather samples from recordings from another source?"

Yugi took a second to consider. "Possibly, depending on the quality of the recording."

"Come this way," Yami said eagerly, grabbing Yugi's hand. He led the robot to his room, opening the door to reveal computers set up atop multiple desks, screens and wires abundantly visible.

Yugi's violet eyes widened slightly, taking in every detail of the remarkably messy and chaotic room.

"Okay," Yami said, pulling out a mouse from the tangle of wires and clicking it a few times, "Here are the files. Do you want to listen to them, or…?"

"I am able to download them directly," Yugi said. "Do you have a charger I can use?"

Yami stuck his hand into the mess of cords and drew one out. "Is this good?" he asked curiously, going around Yugi and opening up the port. Seeing that it fit, Yami plugged it into the port and then into the outlet, using an adapter to reach it.

Yugi watched his actions curiously, except for when Yami was behind him. The robot simply wasn't able to understand how Yami found his things so easily, but filed the observation away to contemplate some other time as files started opening up in his mind. He processed the recordings, editing out as much of the static and unnecessary noises as possible until finally he shook his head.

"Yami," Yugi said, his tone shifting to one of regret, "This is terrible."

Yami laughed. "Yeah, I figured, but I thought I'd check."

Yugi unplugged himself, closing the port. "There are several things I managed to gather from this recording, however. The voice featured is prominently male and very…" A strange expression crossed his face before he continued, "Loud - all his words seemed exaggerated."

"Yeah, that sounds like him," Yami agreed. "Jonouchi doesn't do things quietly." He laughed. "Well, maybe I can find something with better quality…"

He trailed off as he stared in shock at Yugi, who was quiet. The robot - had to be, he had a port and everything - had tears slipping out of his eyes, silently gushing down his cheeks. "Y-Yugi?" Yami stammered, startled at the sight of a robot that could not be a human… no matter how human he looks… crying.

Yugi smiled. "Yes?" he replied.

"You're, er, crying," Yami said awkwardly, not knowing what else to say.

"I am?" Yugi said, sounding surprised. He tilted his head to look down at his lap, where spots of dampness from the tears were blooming. "Oh…" Yugi was silent for a moment, before saying flatly, "Self-diagnostics running. Complete. Results: error 04641." Yugi faced Yami, his face blank and his voice emotionless, "As an apology for giving you faulty merchandise, this item will be returned and exchanged for a newer model. Would you like to customize it now, or at a later time?"

"Uh…" Yami blinked uncomprehendingly. "What?"

Yugi started to repeat his message until Yami interrupted incredulously, "Hang on! What do you mean, returned and exchanged? I like the robot I have right now, thank you very much!"

"Eh… That's not… Faulty products are automatically on recall," Yugi said.

"Are you… really a robot?" Yami asked.

Yugi tilted his head. "Yes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." The reply was monotone, almost, but Yami heard the hint of frustration.

"Absolutely certain?"

Yugi blinked. "Yes. My body is made up of materials not found in a healthy human body, including: glass, steel, cotton, monofilament line, plastic, iron…"

"Hang on," Yami interrupted, stopping Yugi, "So your body isn't human. Are you human?"

"...No," Yugi answered after a brief second.

Yami frowned. "Don't lie to me," he ordered. "No robot can cry. At least, not without reason. Are you human?"

Yugi tilted his head one way, then the other, before saying with a smile, "I am not human."

"Were you human?"

"What? No, I…" Yugi's face twisted. "I…"

"How did they put a human in a robot?" Yami questioned. "Why bother?" Judging from Yugi's reactions, it was obvious what the answer was, no matter what he said.

Yugi shivered. "That… information is not available."

"So it exists?"

"That information is not available."

Yami narrowed his eyes. Then he grabbed a new cord, flicked Yugi's port opened, and plugged it into Yugi. "Stay right there," he said coldly, moving to one of the computers. He pulled out a keyboard and mouse, rapidly typing as symbols flashed on the screen.

Yugi watched him blankly. His processors were stalling as they tried to fulfill several pre-programmed operations at once.

1) Be Yami's companion.

2) Follow Yami's orders.

3) Never tell anyone the truth.

They contradicted with one another, and Yugi was having difficulty organizing them by the amount of priority assigned to them. He couldn't discard any of them - the first two were the whole reason he had been ordered. However, the third was a permanent addition to his hardware. It was made so that he couldn't remove it on his own.

Suddenly information flickered through his brain. Data was downloading into his system - as it came, Yugi examined each file as it came. Then his thinking started to change as his coding was altered.

"What are you doing?" Yugi asked frantically. He moved to look at Yami, who was focused on the computer. Which was plugged… into… himself… Yugi's processors set aside the prioritized orders, devoted to the scene before him. Was Yami hacking into his systems?! He was supposed to be programmed with firewalls and…

Yami snickered. "Yeah yeah, that's what every multi-billionaire company thinks when they program their stuff," he muttered, replying to Yugi's thoughts. After a moment Yugi realized that all the computer screens were on, and everything in his brain was displayed in green text.

Yugi groaned as a wave of pain rolled through his head. "Ow…" he groaned, wincing.

"Sorry," Yami said absently, not looking up. "That's the price of being yourself again, I'm afraid." He grinned. "Hurts to be human, huh? I think…" Yami tapped something with finalty, leaning back with a sigh in his chair. "I think you're good! Mind if I ask a few questions?"

"Um… no?" Yugi replied hesitantly.

"Great. What's your name?"

"Yugi…" Yugi furrowed his eyebrows, "Mutou."

Yami's smile grew. "Alright… Let's see if your response has changed. Were you human?"

"Yes. I was."

Yami leaned towards Yugi. "What happened?" he asked, staring at Yugi intently.

Yugi hesitated. "I… was human. But…" Yugi paused. Then he restarted, "Robots are not able to be human. They are machines, who cannot deal with a situation to which they have no response to. However, robots can come startlingly close to human behavior. All they needed was a bit of logic… human logic. This cannot be programmed, but can be inserted through an outside source."

"How do they put a human in a robot?" Yami asked bluntly.

Yugi shrank back. "How do you put two things together? You take them apart first." He closed his eyes briefly, forcing his processors - brain? - to keep away from the memories Yami's hacking had unlocked. Yugi refocused on Yami. "A very small percentage of me contains my original body…"

Nodding, Yami guessed, "But you're mainly robot, huh? I wonder - is making a better product really why they're dissecting humans?" He grinned. "That's pretty evil. Interesting. Well, we've got a whole month ahead of us! Let's see if we can find out anything worth talking about."

Yugi decided he did not like being more human than robot.

Robots, surely, did not feel as terrified as he was right now, even when faced with Yami's insanity.