Reviews!

Musicalocelot: Oh my gosh this story makes me happy! I am quickly falling in love with this AU! I just love everything about it! Failing. Words! XD. Mabel has the journal but is still being her peppy crazy self. Dipper doesn't have the journal but is still be his curious, sceptical self. And Ford. It seems he's doing his very best to discourage the twins from exploring the oddities of Gravity Falls to keep them safe. Unfortunately, he doesn't seem to realize that the more you tell a person not to do something, the more they want to do it. I wonder how long he'll keep up his charade of ignorance? StayAwesome~

Wow, I love how you made that argument scene a bit deeper. And Wendy finding him in the attic instead of Soos! Brilliant. She so would spy on her boyfriends wouldn't she XD. StayAwesome~

Me: You caught my flow perfectly! That's exactly what I was doing with Dipper, Mabel, and Ford! I wasn't expecting people to be so smart. My full au description is on my DeviantArt, hannahthepadawan, so look at that. And totally, Wendy would SO spy on her boyfriends! it made sense to put her in, since I tried to reverse their roles, and also since Wendy is their babysitter, and she's been doing a bad job of knowing where they are so far.

The doorbell rang at five o'clock on the dot. Mabel raced down the stairs, pulling on a purple sweater and tucking the Journal into the inside pouch. She wouldn't let Dipper get his hands on it again. The sweater was one she was quite proud of. It had a cat face on it and, in sparkly letters, said "meow wow". One of her personal bests, if she did say so herself.

The doorbell rang again. "Coming!" she shouted, dashing to the front door. Norman stood on the other side, looking dapper as always. "Hey, Norman," she said, showing off her sweater. "How do I look?"

Norman stared, mesmerized by the sparkly letters. "Shiny..." he grunted.

Mabel rolled her eyes playfully. "You always know what to say!"

Dipper watched them leave from a seat in the living room. He sighed, watching his video on the camcorder. "Wendy was right. I don't have any real evidence." He muttered, watching Mabel teach Norman to play hopscotch, only for him to collapse head first onto the ground. He fast forwarded to Mabel and Norman watching the sky. He had his arm around her.

"I guess I can be kind of paranoid sometimes and—" Suddenly, on the tape, Norman's hand fell off. He reached around Mabel and reattached it, glancing around warily. "Wait, what?!" Dipper rewound the tape and watched it again. "I was right!" He gasped, his panicked movements suddenly tipping the armchair backwards.

Dipper emerged from behind the chair in a panic, dropping the camera as he dashed off, shouting for Great Uncle Ford. Where was he?! This was the worst time for him to disappear. He ran outside; he had to find a fast way to follow Mabel! They were probably in the middle of the forest by now!

Then he spotted Soos, and more importantly, the golf cart he'd reassembled from parts and modified. He'd always talked about adding nitrogen boosters, even though those were illegal.

"Soos!" He gasped, dashing towards the chubby man. "Soos, I need to borrow the golf cart to save my sister from a zombie!" He shouted, waving his arms wildly.

For a couple seconds, Soos only stared at him, and Dipper was worried for a moment that he'd be called crazy. But Soos laughed. "Sure, dude. I've been wanting someone to test this out for a while." He said, dropping the keys into Dipper's hand. The key chain had a UFO charm on it. The same one he saw in Great Uncle Ford's pocket.

Dipper inserted the keys into the ignition and heard the engine rev with a satisfying growl. He put his foot lightly on the pedal and began to back up when he passed Wendy and stopped.

"Hey," she said casually, then leaned in, her hands were behind her back for some reason. "So, I know I'm probably supposed to, like, stop you or something," she said, "but if you're going off to fight Zombies, you should probably take this."

Suddenly, Dipper found Wendy's ax in his hands. It was pretty heavy, but he could lift it. "Goodluck," she said with a wink.

Dipper smiled and began to drive off, hearing Wendy shout in the distance, "I want that back, by the way!"

Time to rescue Mabel.

Norman had his back to Mabel, playing with his zipper tab nervously. "Uh, Mabel, now that we've gotten to know each other, there's..." he took a shaky breath. "...there's something I should tell you."

Mabel took a step forward, the wind tousled the weird floppy bits of hair at the back of Mabel's head. "Oh, Norman," she said with dramatic passion, "you can tell me anything!" But in the back of her mind, she kept repeating the same thoughts over and over: Please be a vampire, please be a vampire!

Norman turned around, nodding his head anxiously. "All right, just... just don't freak out, okay?" he said raising a hand in a calming gesture. "Just... just keep an open mind, be cool!"

Mabel's eyes widened as Norman slowly began to unzip his hoodie. Was he taking off his shirt? That was what guys did in movies. But what Mabel saw when he cast off the hoodie was nothing she had expected.

Standing before her were five tiny men, two at the bottom for feet, two on top of them holding fake foam hands on sticks, and one on top of them all as the head. They all had beards and red pointy hats.

Norman had revealed himself... as a bunch of gnomes.

The top gnome brushed his hair out of his face. "Is this weird?" he asked, his voice much different than Norman's. "Is this too weird? Do you need to sit down?"

Mabel could only stare.

He nodded. "R-r-right, I'll explain. So!" he snapped his fingers. "We're gnomes. First off. Get that one outta the way."

"Uh..." Mabel's eye twitched.

The gnome continued. "I'm Jeff," he said, then began pointing to each gnome in turn, "and here we have Carson, Steve, Jason and... I'm sorry, I always forget your name," he said to the bottom-right one, one with a wild beard and crossing eyes.

"Schmebulock," it grunted, revealing its crooked teeth.

Jeff snapped his fingers again. "Schmebulock! Yes!" he said.

Mabel sat down on a log, smacking her forehead. She felt dumb. She felt gullible.

"Anyways," Jeff started again, "long story short, us gnomes have been lookin' for a new queen! Right, guys?" he asked the others.

The gnomes below him began reaching out for Mabel, chanting "Queen! Queen! Queen!"

Jeff laughed nervously. "So what do you say?" He tapped his foot twice, and the gnomes worked together to make Norman's body kneel down in a proposing fashion. Carson used the hand to present a ring in a box, one with a cluster of forest crystals as the diamond. Jeff clasped his hands together. "Will you join us in holy matrignomey?" he blinked, then corrected himself. "Matri...matri-mo-ny! Blah! Can't talk today!"

Mabel slowly stood up, biting her lip. "Look... I'm sorry, guys," she said, feeling a pang of guilt as Jeff's excited expression melted into a sad frown. "You're really sweet, but, I'm a girl, and you're gnomes, and it's like, 'what'?" She sighed, looking down. "Yikes..."

Jeff nodded somberly. "We understand." He said. "We'll never forget you, Mabel."

Mabel smiled. They were just cute little forest creatures. Maybe they weren't so-

"Because we're gonna kidnap you."

"Huh?" Mabel blinked.

Suddenly, the gnomes became rabid, and jumped at her, growling.

Mabel screamed. This was bad.